


Tethered

by Metope0



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra, Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Romance, Soul-Searching
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:14:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 131,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26184772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metope0/pseuds/Metope0
Summary: She had to get away. And she had to do it in such a way that she wouldn’t be found. It was better that way. She wouldn’t wreck a home that way. Would be out of her mother’s hair, away from her sister’s pitying looks, and no longer a burden to the rest. The frown that seemed to permanently grace her face these days, grew deeper as she thought back to how stupid she had been. She was thirty five years old for spirit’s sake, and she still made choices as if she was fifteen.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------It has been five years since Lin and Tenzin broke up. Five years in which they hardly spoke. Five years in which Lin has worked hard on getting control of her life and her career, as she is expected to follow in her mother's footsteps. But life only lets itself control for so much. And when one night that should never have happened, leads to far-reaching consequences, Lin decides she has had enough of the feeling of constantly failing her family's expectations of who she should be. For the sake of her family, and because in the end she only wants what is best for them, she leaves...
Relationships: Lin Beifong/Tenzin
Comments: 471
Kudos: 611





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there,  
> So this is my first Avatar fanfiction. I binged Legend of Korra the other day, and let's be honest, the kids of Team Avatar are basically the most interesting about the whole series, especially Lin. I didn't read the comics, so all my Avatar knowledge is based on the two series (and whatever I picked up on through social media, but oh well). 
> 
> Anyways, long story short: I think the Lin-Tenzin pairing is an incredibly interesting one, because it has so many layers. As is the relationship Lin has with her mother and sister. So I thought I would write about that. The set up of this first chapter is not shockingly original - in fact, there are many fics that have this event at the centre of their plot. But I still hope that I can take this story in an interesting direction, especially because this fic will remain Lin centered. 
> 
> Let me know what you think! I would love to hear if this first chapter has peaked your interest, or that I can better go back to the drawing table with it. 
> 
> Best,
> 
> Metope

She had to get away. And she had to do it in such a way that she wouldn’t be found. At least not right away, and _especially_ not by her all seeing mother - the irony there wasn’t lost on her.

She had pondered on how to do it for almost a week, until she had come up with a plan. Actually, it was more of a half-baked plan, only good for the first few weeks of a journey. A week wasn’t enough to think the rest of it through, but she didn’t have more than a week, either.

She could kiss her career at the police department of Republic City goodbye with this move. But then again, that career would be over soon enough anyways, once they would find out.

She wouldn’t be able to metal bend that much anymore either, only earthbending from now on. There weren’t that many metalbenders yet, and there definitely weren’t many female benders - her level of skill would stand out too much. Well, she would just have to accept that then. She would manage one way or another.

Then there was the matter of where she was going to stay. In the earth kingdom she would blend in nicely, but stand out at the same time because too many people knew her - or knew people who would know her or her family. Air temples were of course no option, nor was the South Pole, and she was not planning on freezing to death willingly anyways, so the North Pole wasn’t a candidate either.

That left the fire nation - and wasn’t that actually perfect? Large enough to find a nice town here or there that was neither too boring nor too obvious. And, although Zuko and Izumi were close friends of the entire extended family, due to all that happened her family didn’t visit the fire nation very often. Plus, it’s beachy but also rocky landscape would make for a niche change as well. And then there was of course that other very important fact: her father had supposedly been from the fire nation.

And that is how Lin set out in the direction of the earth kingdom that morning - before she could go to the fire nation there were some things that she needed to take care of first. And while she did them, her mother would still be able to follow her through the earth and vines of the trees. Going directly to the fire nations was therefore no option.

That was alright, though, as long as Toph didn’t know _what_ she was doing exactly it didn’t matter if she knew where she was. And as long as Toph would be able to follow her - as would Suyin - neither of them would alarm the rest. Quite the opposite, the rest would probably be alarmed upon her disappearance, and though her mother would be furious with her for leaving the police force and ruining the Beifong name, her mother and Suyin would dismiss the worries of the rest. Precisely because they could still track her, follow her, and by default come and drag her back to Republic City once they lost their patience.

Patience wasn’t a virtue the Beifongs were very good at. That meant she had about a week, two at the most, to disappear from the earth, at least, for as far as her family was concerned.

It was better that way.

She wouldn’t wreck a home that way. Would be out of her mother’s hair, Away from her sister’s pitying looks, and no longer a burden on the rest.

The frown that seemed to permanently grace her face these days, grew deeper as she thought back to how stupid she had been. She was _thirty five_ years old for spirit’s sake, and she still made choices as if she was fifteen.

A fight with Pema, another fight with Pema, rumors of the great Airbender staying in a hotel instead of going back to his wife after work at the council, and then suddenly there he had been, at her _office_ of all places. Casually stating that he was ‘just in the area’. But he hadn’t been ‘in the area’ for the past five years, not since they broke up. And Tenzin didn’t do things casually, so all of it was a obviously a lie. She furiously had turned him away. What did he think? -showing up at her work like that.

But somehow he had managed to get her to agree to dinner later that week. Just for old time’s sake, he had said, and because they couldn’t keep avoiding each other. Their work made it impossible. The entire week she had gone back and forth between cancelling it and going through with it, until suddenly it was the night of the dinner already and cancelling wasn’t really an option anymore.

She had gone to the restaurant with her usual scowl on her face, and in uniform. At least, that way it seemed like a business dinner to snooping eyes - and there were enough of those.

Dinner had started awkward and distant. But to her great frustration somewhere down the road it has morphed into somewhat of a pleasant evening - feeling just like old times. They had one, two, three glasses of wine and then some sort of dessert that most definitely held some sort of liquor.

After dinner they had parted ways quickly. She had been tired, both physically and emotionally. She went back to her apartment and was already getting ready for the night when she heard someone walking up to her door. Three short staccato knocks betrayed who it was. With a frown and a raised eyebrow she had opened the door to Tenzin. That is when he had told her that things weren’t good between Pema and him. That the rumors were true. During the entire dinner he hadn’t brought it up, and she hadn’t asked. But now, it seemed he needed to get it all off his chest. He told her that they had decided they needed space for a while, so he had gone and booked a hotel. While listening to him, she had unconsciously opened the door further, thus allowing space for him to enter the apartment.

He went on, rambling – aided by the alcohol of earlier that night no doubt – explaining how he had noticed Pema and one of the male acolytes getting a little too close for his taste - had confronted her about it after hesitating and doubting and pondering about it in true Tenzin fashion, only to find out that he hadn’t imagine it.

That had surprised Lin. Lin thought many, not so very kind, things of the acolyte, but this she hadn’t expected of the younger woman. Then again, it made sense: Tenzin was ten years older than Pema. Pema was _quite_ young, only 28 years of age. And while Tenzin was working late and away a lot for the council, Pema would be stuck at that island. No wonder her eyes had started wondering.

But the hurt Lin had seen in Tenzin’s eyes that night as he told her about all of it, had made her feel ashamed about the slight glee she had felt over the fact that ‘Perfect Pema’ didn’t seem to be so perfect after all.

In an attempt to somewhat comfort him, she had tentatively put a hand on his upper arm. Whether it was the alcohol, the emotional state he was in or her own judgement that had been lacking she didn’t know, but Tenzin had interpreted it as something else than what she had meant by it, and suddenly he had come really close, holding her eyes with his gaze and breathing suddenly growing shallow.

With her voice barely more than a whisper she had told him that this wasn’t a good idea; that he had to leave. And to prove her point she had distanced herself from him, opening the front door of her apartment to let him out.

Shaking himself out of whatever trance had been in, he had agreed with her and had left - albeit somewhat reluctantly.

She waited until she felt him leave the building before she returned to continue her routine to get ready to sleep. No longer paying attention she therefore startled, then grew annoyed, when some minutes later again three staccato knocks vibrated through her apartment.

Opening the door abruptly she took in a deep breath, ready to tell Tenzin off. This was crossing all boundaries.

But as soon as she had opened the door, Tenzin had stepped forward, crashing his lips on hers. And for a few seconds she had been frozen, while her brain yelled at her that this was absolutely wrong. But then she had felt his strong arms wrap around her as he had started to push her back inside the apartment. And with each step her resolve seemed to disappear a little more, until they had reached the bed and she fell down on it with him on top of her.

Breaking the kiss, she had the momentarily clarity of mind to ask him what on _earth_ it was that he was doing, and to tell him that this was not going to help him figure things out with Pema and that she was _definitely_ not some rebound or back up he could go to when he felt down. But he had silenced her with more kisses all the while whispering in between that it was _her_ , that it had always been her and would always be her whom he loved.

And she, with her stupid mind, had believed him. Had let herself go weak and vulnerable all over again, like she only ever let Tenzin see her these days. She had thought it meant that he had _finally_ chosen her.

But the following morning he had said that this shouldn’t have happened, that they had no future together. And they had gone over that particular part countless of times already, so it still confused her that she had felt so betrayed and defeated.

And she had had the guts to ask him what the hell last night’s words had meant then. And he had just looked at her with that infuriatingly calm stare, and suddenly a wave of sadness washed over his face as he told her that all of that was still true- that it would always be her for him, but that that didn’t matter in the real world. Because she still didn’t want any children, now did she?

And she had shaken her head. No, she didn’t. Though not for the reason he thought she didn’t. Not because of her career, but because she was terrified that their children wouldn’t be airbenders, and then what? Tenzin would leave her, or grow frustrated, or start to hate her, it would ruin everything. She would ruin everything, especially his life. And that is the last thing she wanted. And hadn’t she been proven right, when she had seen him the happiest she had _ever_ seen him on the day that he had announced that his by now three year old daughter Jinora showed signs of air bending? With the strong earthbender genes that ran in her family, the chances of their first child, or even their second or their third child being an airbender were slim.

And then Tenzin had gotten up and left, the unspoken expectation hanging in the air that he hoped they would keep this between them. And she had let him go. Best to let him go, anyways.

And during the two months that followed she had buried herself in work, ignoring the whispers of her colleagues about her mood and attitude. And she had buried herself even deeper when word got out that the airbender and his wife were back together again. And she had thrown up when she heard the news that the airbender and his wife were expecting another child.

But then she had thrown up again, and again, and again. And then she realized, she was _also_ expecting a child. And that is when she knew she had to leave…


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who commented on the first chapter and left kudos! That is so much appreciated and really motivated me. So much so that the chapter I had planned to release this weekend, was already finished. So here you go :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

Was she a bad person now? She didn’t know. Was Tenzin? She didn’t know that either.

Did she hate Tenzin? Yes. And also no. Did she hate herself? No. And also yes.

Tenzin had sort of cheated on his wife. They were living apart, but they were still married, had a child together for spirits sake. Though she thought he would probably have told Pema about what had happened before they got back together again. Knowing Tenzin well, she knew there was no way he would have been able to keep it hidden from his wife for long. Guilt would eat away at him if he did. And apparently Pema had forgiven him, because now she was pregnant again.

No Tenzin wasn’t a bad person. Misguided, maybe. But not bad. Though about herself, Lin wasn’t too sure. She had beycome the other woman. Or rather, she had  _ been _ the other woman. Past tense. She wasn’t anymore. But she had been, and that was most certainly bad.

There was the excuse that at the time she had thought that he had finally chosen for her, instead of Pema. But she would be lying if she didn’t admit that that thought had been accompanied with a little voice in the back of her mind the entire time, that told her that of course, that wasn’t true. And it hadn’t been. Nothing was ever that simple. Nothing was ever _just_ about one thing.

Like the reason they broke up wasn’t  _ just _ because she was secretly afraid that she wouldn’t give birth to airbenders. That was a big part, the  biggest part, of her decision to end the relationship, make no mistake there. But it had also been just a little bit because she really wasn’t planning on becoming some sort of baby machine until they would have a child that  _ did _ airbend. And yes, then there was her career too.

But did that make her a bad person? No. Just like it didn’t make Tenzin a bad person for wanting all of that, it didn’t make her bad for not wanting it. Not lik this anyways. It made him a bit of a fool though, always trying to become what his father had been- never himself. But then again, hadn’t she done the exact same thing with regards to her mother? 

Up until now, that is.

With a sigh, Lin brushed a few unruly, lose strands of raven black hair out of her face. Summer was nearing its end, and tried to ensure that no one would forget her by doing her hottest, driest, burning worst in the last few weeks. It was a good thing harvesting was already finished, because crops would certainly die in this heat.

Suddenly she was glad she had left her armour behind. The first four days of travelling she had felt exposed and unprotected without it. But now, on the fifth day she was happy wearing the loose dark green tunic and matching pants of the earth kingdom. It was airy and more importantly: it masked the baby bump that was beginning to show perfectly.

The first part of her journey she had gone by train, until she was in Omashu. There she had taken a rented car to the Misty Palms Oasis and now she was on her way into the desert, looking for the man that would be able to help her to disappear.

After that, she would immediately take a boat to the Fire Nation. She had studied maps of the Fire Nation and had eventually decided that she would be going to Fire Fountain City, or North Chung-Ling as it was now called again. The name it had been given during the hundred year war had stuck however. During the war, the city had been an industrialised, polluted and dangerous place. But over the past decades the city had evolved, becoming more responsible about drilling for gas to supply places like Republic City with energy on the one hand; and guarding the well-being of nature and the health of its citizens on the other. Now, it was a blooming, flourishing city. Bustling with life and clean air. In other words, perfect to raise a child, live peacefully and still be able to disappear in the crowd.

“He!”

The loud voice startled her, so deeply had she been sunken in her thoughts.

A Sandbender was standing not too far away from her.

On edge, she took moved into a fighting stance immediately. And she growled when all it elicited from the Sandbender was mocking laughter.

“Whoa, whoa, take it easy. I don’t mean you any harm, Chief, I just wanted to know if you are alright. It is dangerous to be out in the desert at this time of the day if you don’t know what you’re doing.”

So he knew who she was. Of course he did. The scars on her face have her away immediately. “Who says I don’t know what I am doing?” She snapped.

The Sandbender shrugged. “The fact that youare not covering your face or head from the sun. You’ll get a heatstroke like that.”

“I won’t be the desert long.”

“It doesn’t take long to take a heatstroke. Here,” the Sandbender held out the fabric he had wrapped around his waste until then. “Use this to wrap around your head.”

She looked at him with disdain, signature scowl on her face. Usually that would push people away, but not this man, apparently. Because instead he approached her, arm outstretched with the fabric in his hand.

“Who are you? And what don you want from me?” She bit out, ignoring his outstretched hand.

He shrugged, that infuriating smile still on his face. “I am Koji. I was sent here by Xiaobo. He heard you were looking for him and he wanted to make sure that the two of you would get to him in one piece.”

Lin narrowed her eyes at that, her hand involuntarily but protectively travelling up to her stomach. How did this man know she was with child. Was it that obvious already? And how did he even know she was looking for him. She had shared her plans with no one. “Heard from whom?”

Koji shrugged “From the spirits of course.”

Ah. The spirits. “Of course.” She drawled.

A silence fell between them.

“Well,” Koji spoke, “as much as I enjoy this conversation, I think it is time we leave. Follow me please, Xiaobo is not far away from here.”

While her mind told her not to trust this young man, her intuition told her to go with him. If she was honest, she didn’t have much of an option. Up until then she had pushed the knowledge that she didn’t know where Xiaobo was hiding in the desert  exactly , to the back of her mind. She trusted that she would be able to track him down with her police skills. But once she had been surrounded by sand, that thought seemed to have been one of hubris rather than one of realism.

And so she finally accepted the fabric to wrap as a sort of bandana around her head. And tentatively stepped onto the sandbender’s sand raft.

Only once she sat down, did she notice how tired she actually was. This child was messing with her fitness already.

Leaning her back against the pole of the raft that served as the base for the sail, she allowed her eyes to close. She didn’t even notice it anymore when the bender started to bring the raft into motion, as she had already drifted to sleep. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> I'm back with chapter three! Thanks to all who commented on the previous chapters. I am quite uncertain still about this story, especially since I haven't written any Avatar fanfiction before, so I hope I am doing the character(s) the way I see them justice.
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

“Quite a risky move for the ever mistrusting Deputy Chief Beifong to fall asleep on the sand raft of a total stranger.”

They were the first words she heard when she woke up. She felt groggy and though she had just woken up, exhausted and overheated. Although still mostly invisible from the outside, this child was making its presence known.

“Here. A glass of water. You have to stay hydrated.”

Vision still blurry from sleep, she saw an outstretched hand holding a glass of water in front of her.

Slowly sitting up she took the water before looking suspiciously at the man who had given it to her. He was probably around her mother’s age. His eyes gave it away, though he looked worse. Unkempt brown hair with grey streaks stood out in all directions and his clothes, brown loose pants and a beige gilet, were filthy. Not quite the image she had imagined of the most resourceful man of the desert - or so he had come to be known as. Her hesitation must have shown on her face because suddenly the man gave her a look.

“Oh _now_ you choose to be suspicious. Little late for that isn’t it?”

Giving a shrug she took a sip of the water. The cool liquid was soothing against her sore, dry throat. “He brought me to you. The raft was safe. I knew what I was doing.”

“But you couldn’t be sure of that. Maybe he lied.”

“I could feel that he wasn’t.”

At that the man giggled, moving from where he stood to sit down on the small wooden stool opposite of the cot she was sitting on. Apart from a small table in the corner, they were the only three pieces of furniture in the tent they were in. Outside she could hear the desert wind pulling at the seams of the tent. “But of course you could tell!” He cried out, almost manically happy, and if Lin had been anyone else than the unfazed Lin Beifong, she would have been scared by it. “The daughter of Toph Beifong can tell when someone is lying. A very useful skill, whether blind or not. Very clever that your mother taught it to you. She must be proud of you.”

The glint in his eyes told Lin that he said the latter to taunt her. To get her to admit that if her mother was proud of her, she sure had a funny way of showing it. But she didn’t let herself go down that path. So instead she just took another sip of her water.

“I saw you in a vision. I knew you were coming. Well, the two of you, that is.” He pointed his finger between her and her stomach at that. “But what I couldn’t see, is _why_. So tell me, why have you come to see Xiaobo?”

Finally. They were getting to business.

“I need you to make me a pair of shoes.”

He giggled. “Not a normal pair of shoes, I presume.”

Lin shook her head in agreement. “A pair of shoes with a moderate heel and...a sole of platinum....”

Narrowing his eyes Xiaobo leaned a little forward on his stool, bringing his face closer to Lin’s. “And why aren’t you just asking your sister to manufacture a pair in that marvelous city of hers?”

Lin frowned in irritation. “Can’t you just do it without asking all the questions?”

Xiaobo crossed his arms. “Well, in theory I could, but my prices are high and it just seems a little odd to come all this way in order to ask me to build you a pair of shoes using platinum from the black market, risking your own and your unborn child’s wellbeing to get here, when you could also just buy them at Zaofu. Not to mention that you are the talk of the town in Republic City for just having up and left. If I hadn’t had the vision, I would think you were here undercover for the police to turn me in...”

“Fine. “ Lin huffed. “First of all, I hardly think I risked my own wellbeing getting here, as you put it. Second of all, I cannot get them at Zaofu, because I cannot have anyone finding out what I am doing. And since Zaofu is the only place to source platinum, safe for the black market, I am here to ask you to do it.”

“You want to get away....” Xiaobo mumbled as it started to dawn on him what Lin’s plan was.

“That is why you risked your career leaving like that. Because you won’t be returning. You are going to disappear for those who will go looking for you.”

“Seismic sense doesn’t go through platinum. If I want to get out of this continent without leaving a trail, my best shot is leaving from the middle of the desert on those shoes.” Lin confirmed, eyes averting while Xiaobo’s piercing eyes were still resting on her.

“I trust you will be discreet, though there is no need to lie once they have tracked that I have gone here.” Lin continued. “I will be gone by then, anyways. I just ask that you do not tell them of my...condition.”

It was silent after that for what felt like ages. Slowly Lin started to feel nervous. If this didn’t work out, her whole plan would fail. Her mother would be able to track her all the way to the docks and know exactly where she had gone.

“You are making your life unnecessarily difficult.” Xiaobo finally said. “But I will do it.”

“Thank you.” She replies curtly, trying to hide the relief she felt in her chest at his words.

“What are you doing!?” She then shrieked when Xiaobo suddenly fell onto his knees in front of her and pulled one of her feet towards him by the ankle.

“Measuring your foot. We wouldn’t want you to get any blisters when walking, would we?”

She huffed and rolled her eyes. This man made her feel uneasy. He clearly was the one who was in control of the situation, and she wasn’t used to that.

“I’ll be back before noon with the shoes. Koji can then help you get back to the nearest town. You can be on your way before dark again. In the meantime you can stay here. There is food in that box on the table. Water in the pitcher and try to sleep some more. You don’t look too healthy.”

Before Lin could protest at his insult, he was out the door, leaving her behind and somewhat dumbfounded.

After a while she got up from the cot and moved to the table to get something to eat. Seeing her own reflection in one of the metal plates on the table, she realiszd Xiaobo had been right. She didn’t look too good indeed.

“You have to go easy on me, little pebble.” She mumbled, looking down at her stomach. To the untrained eye it still looked flat. But she knew how flat her stomach had been, and it definitely wasn’t that shape anymore. “We have quite a road ahead of us still before we can find peace and quiet.”

She was suddenly struck by how at ease she was with the life growing inside of her. Her child. Whom she would love unconditionally, whether it would be an airbender, an earthbender, maybe a waterbender through Katara’s roots or no bender at all.

It was the first time that she was pregnant. But it wasn’t the first time that she had _thought_ she was pregnant. Seven years ago there had been a month during which she had thought she was pregnant. In the end it turned out she had skipped her cycle that month due to too much stress at work.

She had still been together with Tenzin then. It had been the beginning of the end. As soon as she had suspected something she had shared the news with him and he had gone and informed half of his family. Aang had still been alive at the time. And before she knew it, everyone knew and was talking about ‘the new airbender’ that was on its way.

It had scared the hell out of her. The pressure she had suddenly felt, had made it almost impossible to breathe. Eventually, she had gone to see her mother, not knowing who else to turn to. Her mother had let her share all her insecurities and fears, only to reply cold heartedly that there was no need to worry because she wasn’t pregnant.

Completely confused she had left again, returned to air temple island where she found Katara and Aang in the kitchen. Katara, ever so empathetic, had immediately seen something was wrong.

There weren’t many people that Lin allowed herself to show her emotions to. But Katara and Aang did belong to that small group. Her second parents. Her second home.

All it had taken was a ‘Lin, honey are you alright? Is it the baby?’ from Katara, accompanied with worried and empathetic looks on both their faces for Lin to break down. She had told them all of it, the visit to her mother, Toph’s harsh words, but also how the pressure and expectations of the past month had almost paralyzed her with fear.

Tenzin had come home somewhere in between, had gone to the kitchen when he heard voices and had been standing in the doorway for half of her story. If she had known, she would have chosen her words differently, would have omitted things. But she hadn’t known.

And once she looked up through teary eyes to see him standing there, disappointment in his eyes that he tried his best to hide, that had been the beginning of the end.

Katara had understood where she was coming from. So had even Aang – later she heard that he had gone in a rage to her mother that same day, asking how she could be so insensitive to her own daughter. But Tenzin, Tenzin had said he understood, but he really hadn’t. The desire to live up to his father legacy, his responsibilities for the air nation taking up too much of his mind.

No. That child, even though it hadn’t even been there, had not made her feel at ease. Had not felt like it was _hers_ even. Not like this child did. And although a single tear escaped from her eyes, a small smile appeared on Lin’s lips for the first time in ages. She knew now, that she had made the right decision in going away.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There I am again, with a new chapter! I figured it would be good to share a little about how the others are experiencing Lin's disappearance. And it also allowed me to let some time pass in the story, without having to describe every move, which I think makes the story more dynamic.  
> Also, although I think many of you have noticed already by now: I am not a native speaker. So my apologies for any weird grammar constructions etc..  
> Anyways, love to hear what you think of this chapter. I'm also still on the fence of what kind of bender (water, air, earth, fire, non-?) Lin's child is going to be. I had/have a plan for this from the start, but I'm still open to alternatives, so whoever wishes to share their ideas is very welcome ;-).  
> Best,  
> Metope

She threw up violently for the umpteenth time that morning. In all of her plans she hadn’t counted on the journey by ship to trigger her morning sickness like this.

What she also hadn’t taken into account, was how often she apparently subconsciously checked her surroundings through seismic sense. Something that wasn’t possible anymore now that she was standing on platinum soles.

To her own dismay she found that it made her feel unsafe, jumpy even.

The good thing about that, was that her little plan seemed to have worked. If she couldn’t ground herself through seismic sense, then her mother couldn’t find her either, nor could Suyin. The fleeting moments where her hands would touch something connected to the earth wouldn’t be enough for them to track her. And Xiaobo had gone out of his way, giving her four platinum thin discs when she left. To put under the legs of her bed, he had said, because she wouldn’t be standing nor wearing her shoes when asleep.

She hadn’t even thought of that. Such a small thing could have ruined her whole plan. She couldn’t afford being that sloppy again. Luckily, Xiaobo had been there. So now she was prepared. And soon, not only platinum soles, but also a whole sea would be between her and her family. And although a nagging feeling of regret and homesickness was already tugging at her heart, she knew she was doing the right thing.

Xiaobo had said the whole town was in disarray about her sudden departure. But she doubted that was true. Probably an enormous exaggeration. She wasn’t even sure if her family would have realized by now that she was not coming back - let alone the city..

..

“Mom!”

“Do you have to shout like that? I already heard you coming my way from the loud stomping of your feet.

“If you did, that would have told you there is something urgent, and you could perhaps stop what you are doing.” Suyin countered as she watched her mother levitating than destroying large boulders in the backyard of her home in Zaofu.

Toph sighed. Lowering the boulders and turning towards her daughter. “Fine, what is it?”

“Do you know what day it is today?”

The older woman shrugged.

“It’s been a week since Lin left. You said she would be back within a couple of days. “ Suyin said, her tone accusatory as she folded her arms as if she was a pouting teenager.

“Funny, I vividly remember you agreeing with me only a few days ago when the entirety of Twinkletoe’s family came here, dragging me with them and ready to start a search mission, that there was no need to worry and that Lin was probably taking a few days of leave.”

“Well, that was before I talked to her colleagues who said she never took any leave there but had handed in her _resignation_. And also back then I was still able to feel a connection to her through the earth. And now I can’t anymore.”

“Why, look at you, worrying about your sister. Who would have thought I would still live to see that day and -“

“Mom!” Suyin called out again, feeling anger rise within her. “I am telling you that it very well looks like your daughter, my _sister_ , has disappeared without so much as a word. And all you can do is joke!? Do you even care!?”

“Hey, watch your tone!”

“Really, now you want to start hanging out the parent?” Suyin mocked, hands now travelling to her hips as she gave her mother a pointed look. Not that Toph could see that, of course, but she still felt like doing it.

For a moment neither of them said anything before Toph let out a sigh. “Of course I care. I noticed this morning already that I couldn’t sense her anymore. And of _course_ I worry. I just don’t like admitting it.”

Creating herself a bench from stone, Toph went to sit down where she stood. The stone allowed enough space for a second person and so Suyin went to sit down next to her mother.

In the distance she saw her five year old daughter Opal playing with the twins. She kept looking at them as she voiced the question that had kept swirling through her head ever since Lin had gone.

“Do you think we drove her away?”

“What? You, by rubbing your perfect family in her face every chance you had and me by leaving her alone with an entire policy academy and unruly city so that I could have some peace and quiet in the swamp? Whatever makes you say that?”

“This is still all a joke to you, isn’t it?” Suyin asked agitatedly.

“You know it is a coping mechanism.”

Suyin nodded. “I do. But that doesn’t answer my question.”

“To be honest,” Toph sighed, “we wouldn’t give Lin enough credit if we make her leaving about us. She is too strong and independent for that. Too much of a loner as well. Now _that_ is something I am definitely to blame for. But that has always been the case. Nothing new there. It doesn’t make sense that she would suddenly be fed up with that. Nor for her to just leave like that. As for your relationship, if anything, I would say that you and she had just started to make amends, didn’t you?”

“I thought so too.” Suyin pouted. “But then over the past few weeks she suddenly got so distant and cold and grumpy again. She buried herself in work.”

“Still doesn’t add up though...”

“Maybe she was taken...kidnapped or something..” Allarm suddenly took a hold of Suyin as she allowed that scenario to settle in her mind.

Toph snorted however. “Skilled guy or gal who manages to pull that off without so much as a trace. I seriously doubt it. If anyone would try to harm, my Lin, she would give them the fight of her life. We would know. ”

“I still I think we should go looking for her.” Suyin replied firmly. “Do you know where she was, the last time you felt her?”

“In the desert. That’s why I thought she was just doing some soulsearching.” Toph noticed. “The desert is a good place for that.”

Suyin sighed deeply. “I am going to wire Tenzin .”

..

“Honey?”

Tenzin looked up from his newspaper to see his wife standing in the door frame, a slight frown on her face.

“What is it, Pema? Are you alright? Is it the baby?” They were nearing the three months mark, but so much could still go wrong with their unborn child.

Pema shook her head, a small smile on her lips as her right hand caressed the baby bump that was beginning to show.

Walking up to Tenzin she went to sit in the chair next to him. “We are good, right? You and I. Even after what happened?”

“Yes! Pema, yes of course we are.” Tenzin was quick to say. Turning in his seat he put his newspaper away so that he could take her hands in his. “Where is this coming from? What’s going on?”

“Suyin just called.”

“Ah..” Now Tenzin slowly started to guess in which direction this conversation was heading.

“She and Toph lost all connection to Lin. Toph apparently knows she was in the desert before she couldn’t sense her anymore. Suyin wants to go and look for her there. She wants you to come with her.”

Tenzin sighed. “Well,” he started. “I would be lying if I said I am not worried. But knowing Lin, she is probably just hanging around in the desert, investigating a lead or just letting of steam about whatever frustrated her, or something.”

“In a place where even Toph, _inventor_ of seismic sense, cannot see her?” Pema countered with an arched eyebrow. “I think they are right in wanting to go looking for her.”

“Well, I will call Kya to accompany Su, because I am not leaving my pregnant wife behind to go look for a grown woman who is too irresponsible to let those she cares about know where she has gone to on holiday.” Tenzin replied defensively.

“Su also asked if we had any idea about _why_ she could have left.” Pema continued, giving Tenzin a pointed look. “All she and Toph had noticed is that she was increasingly more moody over the past few weeks.”

There was no chance avoiding what Pema was hinting on now. Tenzin sighed deeply at that, rubbing his hand over his face and closing his eyes for a moment. “I made such a mess of everything. It wasn’t right to either of you to do what I did. I know that. And-“

“Tenzin, look at me.” The softness in Pema’s voice cut him off. Opening his eyes, he was taken aback by the love shining in her eyes as she loked at him. “We all make mistakes. Some bigger than other. But that is in the past now. We moved on. I forgave you. You forgave me. You have to stop beating yourself up over this.”

“But what if it caused her to leave?”

“Let’s say it did. Would you then regret having chosen the path you did?” Pema countered. And though she tried to keep her face neutral, Tenzin saw she was bracing herself for the possibility of an answer she wouldn’t want to hear.

But there was no need for that. Because in truth, Tenzin shook his head. “There will always be a small part that cares for her. She was my first girlfriend, we grew up together. You know that. But it is a different love I feel for you. For you and our children. You are my family and I wouldn’t change that. I regret that Lin felt the need to leave like she did, no matter the cause. Whether it is me or something else that pushed her to do it. It means that she didn’t feel safe enough within our entire, dysfunctional, extended family to find someone to confide in. That I regret. But I do not, for one minute regret choosing you, Pema.”

A shuddered breath left his wife’s lips at that as she leaned forward to capture his lips with her own.

“If you want to go with Su to look for her, you should, you know.” She whispered when they broke the kiss.

But Tenzin shook his head. “I’m going to ask Kya to go. She will take it as serious as I would, and that way I can stay with you. I feel that is where I am supposed to be right now.”

..

Fire Lord Izumi turned to look at her father.

“You look tormented, my child. What is on your mind?”

“I had to let my friends down. I had to let our family down.” The woman sighed and when her father sent her a questioning look she continued.

“Lin is missing. She had disappeared. They wanted me to send help, send troupes to help in the search for her.”

“And you said no?” Zuko calmly asked.

Izumi nodded. “If she had been kidnapped, or taken, or held hostage, or there were signs of an accident, I would have said yes. Without a doubt. But it seems that she left on her own accord, with the intention not to be found. She can be literally anywhere in the world by now. We could spend days, months, _years_ looking for her and still not find her. Not if she doesn’t want to be found. And I do not think it would be right to ask my men, whom are funded by the taxes that the citizens of this nation pay for, to look for a woman who left on her own volition. So now they are angry.”

“And with they, you mean Bumi and Toph.”

“Yes.” Izumi smiles lightly, chuckling at how her father knew their friends so well, that she didn’t have to specify the story any further.

“They will calm down.” Zuko said. “I take it Katara and the others understood?”

Izumi nodded. “As did Suyin. She mumbled something about hanging up posters and letting the police look into it. They are quite sure she’s hiding somewhere in the earth kingdom, for she was last seen in the desert.”

“Apparently they went looking for her there and found this man. A sort of mysterious handyman of sorts. I don’t really know.” Izumi waved her hand through the air to express the unimportance of that detail. “He said Lin had come to him and asked him to help her to disappear. And so he had.”

“How?” Zuko asked, genuine interest audible in his voice.

“He didn’t want to tell them.” Izumi sighed.

“Lin must have been very lost if she chose to leave her family behind. She is always so responsible.” Zuko remarked

And Izumi nodded sadly as she sat down at the large table in the dining room of the Fire Palace. “I should have written her more often. Checked in on her more often.”

“Friendships are a two way street.” Zuko offered.

“We were both so very focused on our jobs.” Izumi agreed. “But that doesn’t take away the fact that now she is gone. And none of us have an idea of where she is, or if she is okay...I just hope she is okay...”

..

Kya was unseeingly staring at the starfilled South Pole night sky when she heard shuffling behind her. “Mom,” she mumbled, her voice tired, but her eyes continued to stare at the stars. “What are you doing up? You should be asleep, you need your sleep at your age.”

“She will come back, you know.” Katara said, her voice a little hoarse from old age.

Kya sighed at that. “Usually I am the one saying sharing such platitudes.”

“An unusually cynical reply from my spiritual, optimistic daughter.” Katara countered as she slowly went to sit down next to Kya on the woolen blanket that Kya had draped over a bench. She groaned softly as her old muscles protested against the movements.

“I am not feeling very optimistic right now.” Kya mumbled. “My friend is missing. Or rather, she left without telling me. We were supposed to go on holiday together in two months. Or rather, I would go to Republic City and drag her away from her desk under loud protest and she would hate me the entire journey, but once we would get to whatever idyllic, relaxing beach I would have picked, she would forgive me and we would have a terrific time. And now we can’t, and I miss her already so much that it hurts…”

“I know.” Her mother spoke in an understanding voice. Allowing her daughter to rest her head on her shoulder Katara lovingly combed her fingers through thick brown strands of hair as she stared at the star-filled night sky as well.

..

Many kilometers to the north, Lin was falling down on a bed in the best hotel of Fire Fountain City that she could afford.

A satisfied groan left her lips as the softness of the mattress alleviated the pain and pressure she had felt in her lower back the entire day as she had walked from the docks of the nearby village to the city.

A small smile played on her lips as she realized she had made it. Closing her eyes, she slowly let herself drift to sleep. Tomorrow she would go into town and decide what phase two of her plan would look like exactly. For now, she allowed herself to sleep, her hand protectively resting on her stomach.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? Another chapter?? Well: yessss! When inspiration strikes you got to go with it, right? Let's hope it stays that way, or I'll just have spoiled you all with a crazy update frequency right now ;').
> 
> Thanks to all of you who commented and liked the previous chapter. Your comments are a BIG part of keeping my inspiration flowing. It motivates me and also makes me smile when I read them, so again: than you :)!
> 
> I hope you will like this chapter. I had to bring in some 'new characters' into the story, simply because Lin can't just very well talk to no one else but canon characters when I'm divirting from canon with this story ;-). But don't worry, the story will remain Lin-centered.
> 
> Also, I just wanted to share my thoughts with you: The Lin I am writing about in my story is around 35 years old, thus roughly 20 years younger than LoK-Lin. That means 20 years less of having had to present herself as the strong, no-nonsense Chief Beifong. I believe that allows for her to be just a little less defensive and wary of others, than she has been in LoK (and even then, I believe she was never this rouhg police woman, but very diplomatic when needed to be). I used that theory very much in this chapter: Lin has just arrived in a new city, where she knows absolutely no one, and althought proud and stubborn, she is the intelligent enough to know when to accept help - even if she accepts it reluctantly. 
> 
> And then one last note on the previous chapter: I think what triggered me into writing this story, is that in LoK Lin sometimes seems to somewhat take her extended, chosen family for granted and vice versa. I wanted to explore that concept in this story, and the previous chapter is quite relevant for that theme. 
> 
> Well, I talked enough. I hope you like this chapter :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

She woke up with a start. What if her child _is_ an air bender? Then she has a duty to return...right? To let her child grow up on air temple island, among the acolytes and with Tenzin. With its father...

That would be terribly awkward. They would never forgive her for having left, which would defeat the purpose of why she left in the first place: to lift the mutual burden they were to one another.

Then again, it wouldn’t really change anything. She loved this child already, that much she knew. But that love still coexisted with the feeling that she didn’t want children ‘ _on_ _purpose’_. And that is what had driven her and Tenzin apart. Or actually, his unwillingness to even entertain the thought, had. She felt herself get worked up over it by merely thinking about it.

“Deep breaths, Lin.” She whispered to herself, but she didn’t put it into practice. Just lied there on her back, heart beating rapidly in her chest.

Well, it is no use worrying about right now. She finally told herself. She wouldn’t know for at best two years what kind of bender her child could be, that’s when she herself started showing signs, and that had been quite early. Su hadn’t started bending until she was four, mother had almost given up already. With that thought on her mind and a slight smirk on her lips, Lin drifted back to sleep.

In the days that followed, Lin occupied herself with looking for a place to stay. That turned out to be harder than expected. Apparently there was a housing shortage in the now popular town.

If she wanted a chance at a place that would be suited for a child, she would have to look at apartments that were slightly more expensive than her apartment in Republic City had been. With her savings, she could afford such an apartment for only three to four months until things would get strenuous. Which meant she had to find a job first, and as soon as possible while she could still work.

That was easier said than done however. She found that she was still cautious when it came to talking to other people. She wasn’t sure how far the legacy of the Beifongs as founders and shining stars of the Republic City police reached. To be sure, she tried to hide her scars behind her hair, allowing it to fall more loosely around her face than usual. And on the second day she had immediately bought some new clothes that were more customary to wear in the fire nation.

She quite liked the fire nation style. She chose a dark red coat for herself that reached halfway down her thighs. The front closed with elegant gold looking metal clasps. In the back the coat was longer than in the front, allowing enough space to walk, run and more importantly: bend. Underneath the coat she wore a short sleeved shirt in the same shade of red. She matched it with a pair of tight fitting cream pants of flexible fabric, and then finished it of course with her own black shoes with their platinum soles.

They were the only element that didn’t quite match the fire nation style, but she figured that would be alright. Her accent and green eyes gave away anyways that she was not from around here.

She had decided she wouldn’t metalbend in public anymore, and only earthbend when necessary. That way she wouldn’t draw too much attention and could calmly start looking for a job. The only thing was, what kind of job?

She couldn’t very well join the law enforcement units that were in charge in the fire nation - it would draw too much attention. But what else, then? Two weeks in, she still hadn’t found a solution. She spent her days getting familiar with the city. Observing its quirks, systems and characteristic, hoping that would give her some sense of where she could be of use to the city. Because that’s what she found herself looking for in a job: she had to be of use to the city.

The city was built on deposit of natural gas. That is how it had become a famous place in the olden days: the gas would cause people to have visions and thus it was thought to be a spiritual place.

During the war it had been a heavily industrialized city. Located on Shuhon Island, The city was situated at a small bay, surrounded by hills of rough rocks and gravel - quite ideal to her earthbending. From all the factories that had been built in the hills, now only one remained. This factory effectively extracted the natural gas, so that it wouldn’t escape in large invisible clouds into the city anymore. That had brought an end to the hallucinations. At the same time, this factory, which was designed by Fire Lord Zuko together with her uncle Sokka, managed to convert the gas into clean energy that was kind to the environment and powerful enough to function as a source of electricity to power the entire city.

The city itself was still based around a large square, with the streets and building surrounding it in concentric circles. During the war, a large statue of Fire Lord Ozai had stood in the middle of the square. Now there was a beautiful fountain in the middle of the square. These days, people gathered around it to hang out, children played with the water on sunny days and once a week a market would be set up on the square.

The main source of income for the city was the trade in energy coming from the factory. But the factory also had a second purpose. A large building next to it, was dedicated entirely to inventing other, innovative ways to come up with environmental friendly solutions for the ever growing demand for gas and coal. That way, Fire Fountain City had managed to change it image from an industrialized but polluted city to one focused on innovation and working with nature, in less than a decade.

It was quite marvelous, and Lin found that she liked being in a town that had managed to change the path of its future all by itself. After all, wasn’t she trying to do just that?

However, two weeks of marvel were quite enough to her taste. It was time to give her life some purpose again, and she found she was getting impatient.

Mulling over all of these thoughts, her head suddenly whipped to her left as she heard a piercing scream coming from one of the alleys. The city might have been able to change its image- the severe levels of crime that had been present in the olden days, hadn’t quite disappeared yet. And this scream sounded like someone was in trouble.

Without a thought, Lin sprinted in the direction of the scream only to find a woman of around her age being pressed against the wall by a man twice her size. He covered her mouth with one hand, pinning her against the wall with the other, while a second man was trying to pull her purse from her grasp.

The woman, fear shining in her eyes, wasn’t planning on letting go however, which only caused the other man to tighten his grip. Pained muffled sobs escaped the woman.

Without a thought, Lin raised her arms, causing a large rock to fly to the second man. The impact of the collision caused him to stumble backwards and to let go of the purse.

She was almost immediately met by blasts of fire coming from the other man, who had let go of the woman. “Who do you think you are, missy?” He growled.

But Lin looked past him, eyes focused on the woman. “Go!” She said, and when the woman didn’t react immediately she let out a growled “now!” Before having to jump backwards to avoid another fire bolt from reaching her. Her shoulder collided painfully with some wooden boxes that were stacked in the alleyway.

“We got you...” one of the men grinned as the two of them started to approach her.

Lin couldn’t help but smirk. “Oh really? You are no match to me.” She mocked and raising her hands she raised two large stone walls on either side of them. Before they could realize what she was about to do, she pressed her hands together, causing the walls to sandwich the two men with incredible speed and force.

Lowering her arms again, the walls disappeared, leaving the men unconscious on the ground. Stepping over them, she couldn’t help but scoff as she heard the sirens of the police in the distance.

Brushing the dust off her clothing as she rounded the corner she winced as the muscles in her shoulder protested.

“My friend is a healer. You should come with me.”

Looking up, she found the woman she had just saved standing in front of her.

“I thought I told you to run. If I hadn’t won, they would now still have gotten to you.” She replied, her voice more unkind than she had meant to.

“But I had to thank you for what you did.” The woman countered. “Besides, you didn’t look like the type of woman that would let herself get beaten by those two guys.”

Lin felt the corners of her mouth twitch upwards at that. She gave a nod in acceptance.

“So, will you come with me to my friend? I am Miyuki by the way.”

Lin opened her mouth to politely decline. But suddenly it seemed as if her stomach had turned itself upside down and in a reflex she turned away to the side of the road before bending over and throwing up the contents of her stomach.

Just as she thought she could straighten up again, another wave of nausea caused her to throw up again.

“That’s it. You are definitely coming with me to the healer.” She heard Miyuki’s voice behind her, before she felt a hand on her back rubbing soothing circles while the other moved to keep her hair out of her face.

Sure this time that the nausea would stay away, Lin shakily straightened up again. “I am so sorry.”

But Miyuki shook her head. “Nonsense, you just fought two men twice your size. No wonder your stomach got upset.”

Lin wanted to say that the nausea probably had a different cause, but she suddenly found herself unable to speak, and instead just gave a nod.

“My friend’s house is just around the corner. Let’s go there so she can have your shoulder checked out and you can freshen up, alright?”

Declining now would literally only serve her stubbornness, Lin realised. Besides, be it because she hadn’t had a real conversation with anyone for over two weeks, or not, but she found she quite liked Miyuki. And thus she agreed.

The woman who opened the door of the house that was just around the corner, just like Miyuki had said, looked shocked upon seeing them.

“Miyuki, are you alright? You look as if you have cried and are those bruises on your arm? And who is your friend?”

“Calm down, Sora. I am fine. Two men tried to rob me from my purse. But I was saved by this super woman here, who still hasn’t given me her name by the way.” Miyuki joker as she stepped inside.

“I’m sorry.” Lin replied, suddenly feeling extremely tired and finding it difficult to keep up with Miyuki’s bubbling and rapid way of speaking - it reminded her of Su. “I am Lin. Nice to meet you.”

“I am Sora. Nice to meet you too.” Miyuki’s friend replied as she let Lin pass her. “The living room is on the right at the end of the hall, and -“ she then gave Lin a funny look. “Are you alright? I don’t mean to be rude but you energy feels...unstable..”

“It’s alright. I’m just a little light headed.” Lin replied.

“That’s why I brought her here.” Miyuki said from behind Sora. “Lin here is an amazing earth bender who saved me from two guys twice her size. But she hurt her shoulder, so I told her to come with me so you could check.”

Sora gave a nod of understanding before opening a door on her left. “Then please enter, so I can have a look at you.”

Uncertain Lin stepped into the room. She now found herself in a room with a large healing bath in the middle of it. It brought memories of Kya and Katara to her mind and suddenly she felt sad again.

“You can hang your coat and shirt on the right and then please take a seat here.” Sora smiled and she indicated in a bench next to the bath. “And no need to be afraid. I won’t bite.”

“Sora learned from the best. She is from the North Pole.” Miyuki supplied.

Then she hasn’t learned from the best, Lin thought to herself, but she did as Sora asked.

In just her bindings and pants she went to sit on the bench. In the mirror she passed, she saw that the skin on her shoulder had already started to turn purple.

Sora studied the area carefully. “Is there anything else I should know about your health?”

“I am pregnant.” She said it so fast that it almost seemed to become one word instead of a sentence.

Miyuki’s eyes grew wide from surprise, but Sora merely nodded. “That I had picked up on already. How far along are you?”

“Around 11 weeks.” Lin said.

“Are you sure?” Sora frowned. “Your pregnancy isn’t very visible yet for 11 weeks. Have you had a consult with a healer since you found out?”

“I – uh – yes I am sure and – no, I haven’t.” The formal tone of voice that Sora used while examining her threw Lin off her game. It was so different to the compassionate tone of voice Katara and Kya always had. Then again, they were family.

“Why didn’t you say so before?” Miyuki wanted to know. “In any case, it explains the throwing up.”

Lin shrugged. “You are the first ones I ever told I am pregnant.” She said, as if that explained anything at all.

But Sora seemed to understand. “Do you want me to examine you and see if everything is alright?” She asked, this time her voice was lighter.

“Yes, I would very much like that.” Lin said, and she found that the gratitude that was audible in her voice was genuine. She had been so focused all the time of creating a new future for herself and her child, that the possibility that something could go wrong during the pregnancy had never crossed her mind. But now that it had, she was happy that Sora offered to take any doubts away.

“I will do that first, I can feel you are anxious. I need you to lie down in the healing bath for this, though.”

As if it was an everyday routine, Lin moved to prepare for the healing bath, then stepped into the clean water.

“You have had experience with these baths before, I can tell.” It was an observation but spoken as a question.

“Earthbending isn’t the most subtle of bending styles.” Lin shrugged and it earned her a chuckle from Sora.

“Is there anyone I need to inform that you are here, Lin?” Miyuki now spoke up, and Lin shook her head.

“I am here alone.”

While Sora went to work, scanning her body and examining her stomach through waterbending, Lin told her and Miyuki her story. Or rather, the one she had carefully fabricated as to not lead back to Lin Beifong- thank the spirits that at least _Lin_ was a very common name. 

Thus, she told the two women that she was from a small earthbending town, where she had lived with her mother and sister. Knowing she would need to find an explanation for her earthbending skills and athletic physique, she told them that her village was often raided by criminal groups and that she had had to learn how to defend herself. On the question why she had moved to Fire Fountain City, she answered that she hoped to perhaps find the father that she knew so little about. And _that_ , that wasn’t even entirely a lie, if she were being completely honest.

The only part of the story that she didn’t have an answer for, was as to why she decided to do this all alone while being pregnant. As hard as she had tried, every lie that she had come up with to bury her past with Tenzin with, had felt unnatural and treacherous. But luckily neither of the two women asked – both of them sensible enough to realize that it was most probably a sensitive topic, and they didn’t need to know every detail of the life of this woman they had only just met.

“Where are you staying?” Miyuki wanted to know.

“In a hotel in town.” Lin replied. “I am looking for a job so that I can find a house that I can actually afford.”

“How is that working out for you if you also have to pay a hotel room at the same time.” Miyuki frowned.

“I don’t really have another option.” Lin countered.

“You could come and live with me?” Miyuki suggested. “My housemate just left me because she is getting married.” The way in which Miyuki’s nose scrunched up in slight disgust made Lin chuckle.

“I don’t think you would want a grumpy pregnant lady as your housemate.”

“You don’t seem very grumpy to me.” Miyuki shrugged.

“Oh but I am, believe me.”

“Well, I am friends with Sora. So I think I can handle a little grumpiness.” Miyuki persisted, causing Sora to splash the woman with water in her face in indignation.

“Lin, you don’t seem to be someone who is used to accepting help from others, so just let me give you one piece of advice: take the offer. Hotels here are expensive and so are houses. You talk about having to find a job, but soon you won’t be able to work anymore, and then you need a proper roof over your head.” Sora said matter-of-factly as she moved to grab a towel and offered it to Lin.

“Your baby is fine by the way. Small, but strong. _You_ , on the other hand, need to take it easy. Your body is screaming for attention. It is exhausted and also somewhat dehydrated. You need to take better care of yourself.”

“I can make sure that she does!” Miyuki piped up eagerly. “ _If_ she agrees to becoming my new housemate.”

“Well, I don’t have much of a choice anymore, I believe.” Lin sighed. It was a day full of impulses already, she might as well roll with it…


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> Thanks to all of your kudos and comments on the previous chapter! They make me feel so happy :)!  
> So next chapter, I think we should have a sneak peek back into the lives of the others in Republic City and so on. This chapter sometimes felt a little like writing a 'filler chapter', but at the same time, I found it important to sketch how Lin is picking up her life in the fire nation, to make it as realistic as possible. And it also serves a purpose for her character growth. So I hope you will still like this chapter!  
> Let me know in the comments :)!  
> Best,   
> Metope
> 
> Also, someone did something amazing and made a drawing of Lin based on this story! See the note at the bottom for a link.

She wasn’t ‘cold and bitter Deputy Chief Beifong’ here. She was just Lin. And she found she was trying her hardest to make the most out of feeling this way ­– because surely it would be temporary.

She wasn’t one to try new things and be flexible about it. She wasn’t one for impulsive decisions like moving in with practically a total stranger. Lin Beifong was a rational woman, who weighed her options, who thought things through, who tried to imagine what the consequences of one choice over the other would be, who tried to determined what the public fallout would be – because no matter what she did, it would never stay private, always become public.

Because that was also who Lin Beifong was. Thus, at a young age she learned already that all actions have consequences. And that those consequences for her were _always_ blown way out of proportion because she was the daughter of team Avatar, she learned that only later. As did Kya, Tenzin and the others. That wasn’t fair, but it was the life she had come to know. That, and being the daughter of the chief of police, the daughter of Toph Beifong, had made her calculating and wary of others.

But here in Fire Fountain City there was no Toph Beifong, no chief of police, no Republic City Press. And with their absence also disappeared a constant pressure Lin hadn’t even noticed anymore was there. She felt as if she could breathe easier, she felt as if she was allowed to entertain the thought of the not so obvious choices and even _act_ upon some of them without being punished – in private by her mother. In public by the press.

If only she had felt this way in Republic City, or while she was with Tenzin - then maybe things wouldn’t have happened the way they did. Tenzin might have been the one who put the airbender legacy before her, but she had done quite the same with her mother’s legacy, and she definitely hadn’t made it easy to talk about these things.

Whenever Tenzin would try, she would find an excuse to leave, change the topic or she would just blatantly tell him that she didn’t want to discuss it. It felt easier to do that, than to face her fears. But eventually, that tactic had only caused her fear to become reality: they had broken up.

But that was in the past now. That was Lin _Beifong’s_ past. Here she was just Lin. Just an earthbending woman living in a fire nation town. Nothing special. No one paid attention to her. And with a start she realized that this is what she wanted for her child. To feel as normal as she did right now.

Normal, regular. But not unimportant. Because despite her aversion to the public _eye_ , the public _cause_ and contributing to that cause remained very important to her. And right now, she wasn’t contributing very much, and that bored her.

Miyuki had laughed at her when she said as much and had pointed out that by now, she was four months pregnant, so she wouldn’t be able to work much longer anyways.

Lin had scoffed at that. Surely there had to be a way to be useful?

That’s when Miyuki suggested Lin could join her for the day at the local elementary school where Miyuki taught mathematics to the first second and third graders.

This Lin was flexible, yes. Impulsive, maybe. But crazy? No, she hadn’t gone crazy...yet. So voluntarily spending her day among dozens of children really wasn’t her idea of being useful.

Miyuki had laughed only harder at the look on Lin’s face at her suggestion. “You are going to have a child of your own soon, but you dislike children?”

Although meant as a joke, the comment had made Lin’s stomach drop as Miyuki spoke out loud what a little voice would whisper in Lin’s mind at night. Her unease must have shown as Miyuki’s face had instantly grown serious.

“You’re going to make a great mother, Lin.”

“You don’t even know that. That is a stupid thing to say.” She had snapped, immediately apologizing after it. She really had to try to stop that habit. Lin’s lips had formed a thin line as she suppressed her inner turmoil.

Now, the following morning she stood dressed and ready for the day in the hallway just as Miyuki was on her way out.

“Wanna come after all?” Miyuki asked with a knowing smirk and Lin shrugged.

“Possibly. What would I be doing there? A school is not a zoo where adults can go and just watch…although kids and hog monkeys _are_ quite alike sometimes.”

Miyuki chuckled and shrugged. “Oh I am sure we will find you something to do.” But there was a twinkling in her eyes that made Lin frown. Something was up.

As soon as they entered the school building, Lin knew what exactly.

“Head master Miko!” Miyuki called through the still empty and silent hallway. “I found you a new earthbending teacher!”

“Wait, no, what?!” Lin exclaimed. “I am not teaching anyone anything! Besides -“

She couldn’t finish her sentence as suddenly a door at the end of the hallway opened and a short man with a coat that indicated he was the headmaster of the school, came running towards them.

“Really, Miyuki? You did? Oh what a wonderful start of this day!” He exclaimed in a voice that held the midst between delight and desperation. He turned to Lin.

“Is this her? Oh of course it is. I can see it already.” Taking Lin’s hand he wildly started shaking it. “I am so grateful. _So_ _grateful_. You have no idea how grateful I am. We have been looking for an earthbender for so long. The class needs a new teacher. They are good kids, really, they just need a good teacher. And we couldn’t find one, but now you are here and I am so grateful, Miss...”

“...Lin...” she stammered, blinking and feeling irritation rise within her at this rambling man. It was pathetic. “I am afraid there is a misunderstanding. I am -“

Again she was interrupted. “Oh no, no misunderstanding. Please come I will show you the courtyard.” The man quickly said and he started pulling her by her arm towards the back of the school. “I see you are with child. We of course will make sure you will have a job to return to once you need to go on leave. I guarantee.”

“Of course you do. You just told me there is no one else for the job.” Lin replied unimpressed, but it only caused the headmaster to laugh hysterically.

“An earthbender and funny too. Miyuki really outdid herself.”

Lin looked over her shoulder to Miyuki who was walking behind her and sent her a death glare.

The other woman seemed unfazed however. Instead she just gave Lin a pleading look. “Please Lin. It’s only four kids in the entire city who take this class and they have been without a teacher for over two months now. The previous teacher just wasn’t any good. He didn’t teach them well and it made the kids act up. But you are a first class earthbender if you ask me. You are perfect for the job and it is only elementary level bending, so ideal to teach in your condition.”

“Exactly!” The headmaster exclaimed. “And _Look_! This will be your arena!” They had reached the backyard of the school where a pathetic patch of dusty rocks was apparently the earthbending “classroom”.

Lin closed her eyes and slowly shook her head. Her reflex was to say no, and she had done so already. But at the same time, what did she have to lose? It was either this, or being stuck at home and aimlessly wonder the streets again.

“Fine..” she sighed. And she already regretted her answer the moment she felt herself being pulled into a hug by the head master.

“Please let go of me. Now.” She bit out, to which the man thank the spirits had the sense to do so.

“The class starts in twenty minutes. I have to arrange some things now. Miyuki will explain everything to you.” The man called out and he disappeared back inside again.

Lin turned to look at Miyuki, who looked at her with beaming eyes.

“I am mad at you for tricking me like this, you know?”

“Just try it for today and see if you like it. If you don’t, you can always quit.” Miyuki shrugged. “Every second day of the week, the bending kids have a whole day of bending classes, while the non-bending kids can choose an extracurricular like sword fighting or something else. That is today.

You work from nine to noon and then after the break until three. The earthbending kids are with four. Three boys and a girl. They’ll be here soon so you better make sure you are prepared. I have to go and do the same now for my own class. Do you think you can handle this?”

Lin arched an eyebrow. _After handling a police station full of officers? Please_ \- she wanted to say, but of course she couldn’t, so she limited it to a short “sure.”

As it turned out, teaching kids was very much the same and also _very_ much different to teaching officers. At nine o’clock exactly, Lin found herself staring back at four pairs of expectant eyes. There was Mika, a girl of around 8 years old, two boys named Toki and Pling around the age of 10 and one boy, called Timu who was 12 years old.

Having no clue how to start, Lin eventually decided it would be easiest to just pretend she was talking to the officers at the police station when she was explaining a new strategy to them. And thus, she squared her shoulders, folded her hands behind her back and marched from left to right in front of the four children as she introduced herself.

“Welcome. I am your teacher today. I am here to teach you earthbending. When I am done talking I want you to stand next to each other on the line behind you and show me your best move. That way I can see your skill level. Are there any questions?”

Hesitantly Mika raised her hand, Lin gave her a nod. “Permission to speak.”

“What’s your name? Are you going to be a mother? Also, you speak funny. My mommy talks like that too. She is from the earth kingdom. Are you from the earth kingdom?”

Well, so much for pretending she was talking to her officers, Lin thought. She saw the boys trying to hide their grins from the corner of her eye.

“Very perceptive of you, Mika. Perceptiveness and eye for detail are very important when earthbending. You have to be aware and feel and see every piece, every little grain of sand and stone before you bend. Instead of _giggling_ -“ Lin now abruptly turned around so she was directly facing the three boys who immediately stopped laughing and looked at her with wide eyes. “your classmates might want to take an example after you.”

She gave them all a stern look before directing her attention back to Mika. “And, yes I am going to be a mother soon, I am from the earth kingdom and you may call me Lin. Now, I didn’t come here to chat with you all. Let’s get started.”

She turned at the scoff coming from the twelve year old Timu.

“Did you want to say something?”

“I don’t need earthbending training.” He scoffed, crossing his arms. “I already learned all this school can teach me.”

Lin arched an eyebrow. “Oh is that so? Why don’t you show me.”

“Sure, lady. What do you want me to do?” He mocked.

Ah, Lin thought, this was the acting out Miyuki had mentioned. She narrowed her eyes at the boy. “It is Sifu Lin to you, kid. And why don’t we make it a sparring match.”

Timu shrugged. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Lin noticed the other three kids were following the conversation with wide eyes. She had to direct her attention back to Timu however as the boy started to raise the boulders lying on the field and rearranged them to hang in the sky in a straight line with a wave of this hand. His technique was good for his age, Lin had to give him that. But if this was the best he could do, then there was still a lot for him to learn. He clearly hadn’t been challenged enough.

“Tricks belong in the circus. A sparring match is about _sparring_ , I’m still waiting...” She challenged him and the corners of her mouth curled upwards into a smirk as she saw a hint of insecurity settle in his eyes.

“You really want me to attack you? With the baby and all” he asked.

“I can take care of myself, kid. Don’t you worry about me. Now show me what you got.”

She appreciated the look of determination in his eyes at her comment, before he bent the still hovering boulders to fly towards her one after the other with impressive force.

Lin moved to lean against the school building, crossing one one leg over the other and pretending to brush some dust off her clothes as the boulders came flying towards her. She had to laugh internally as she saw the three younger kids anxiously squirm as the boulders neared her.

She tried to look as unimpressed as possible, as she slowly raised her left hand, still without looking up. Then, by curling her hand into a fist, she crushed all of the boulders at once until they were just dust and gravel. Next, with a sweep of her hand, she redirected the cloud of gravel that was now flying towards her to the opposite side where Timu was standing.

She saw his eyes widening as the cloud with sharp little stones came his way, and he started to step backwards in mild fear, putting his arms in front of him in a way to shield himself.

He had learned his lesson.

And so Lin dropped her hand and with it the gravel fell to the floor right before Timu’s feet. With a shocked expression, the boy looked up at her.

“Are we ready to learn now?” She asked, her voice neutral.

He nodded. “Yes Sifu Lin.”

The rest of the day went quite well. She came up with different exercises for the kids to match their different levels and she even found herself mirroring the smile the four sent her at the end of the day as they waved her goodbye.

She tried to school her features again when she registered Miyuki leaning against the doorframe, a smirk on her face.

“Oh come on. I knew you would love it.” She teased. “And we both know you wouldn’t have come with me if I had told you beforehand.”

“And rightfully so. I don’t teach.” Lin countered, but she felt herself answering Miyuki’s smile with a smile of her own.

“You’re a funny woman, Lin.” Miyuki laughed.

Lin raised an eyebrow at that. “I have been called many things, but funny has never been one of them.”

Miyuki shrugged. “There is a first time for everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://tinaducain.tumblr.com/post/629275850927423488/tethered-chapter-1-metope0-avatar-legend-of


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not even remotely sorry for ending this chapter on a cliffhanger (- okay well maybe just a little bit).  
> Curious to hear what you think of this!
> 
> Also for clarification purposes, see the note at the bottom. As well as this note right here on the matter of the ages of the characters in my story (because I got a lot of questions about that).  
> I am staying pretty close to the actual ages of the characters as they are in LoK:  
> We know from LoK that Lin is 21 when "the incident" with Suyin happened (who is 15 at the time).  
> Lin is 35 when my story starts. Tenzin is 38. Pema is 28. Lin and Tenzin have broken up when Lin was 30.  
> A year prior to that, Aang died at the age of 66. That means Korra is born in that same year and is already five years of age when Lin leaves. Thát means we have around twelve more years to go before LoK starts.  
> That makes Lin 47 in my story at the start of LoK, thus only three years younger than she is in canon LoK.  
> Where I diverge from canon ages, is that I already allowed Jinora to be born and made her three years old at the time of writing. That will make her 15 years of age at the start of LoK and will make Ikki 12 years of age. But I think we can all live with that, right?
> 
> Oh and let me tell you right in this moment already: My Lin will NOT have grey hair at the age of only 47, nor will she at fifty. I know they are different times in LoK, where people aged earlier in life. But if the men who are all ólder than Kya and Lin and Suyin don't have grey hair, than those ladies don't need to have it either. - The fact that there is nothing wrong with grey hair is besides the point here. The point is that LoK makes the women age faster/more visibly than the men and there is just no good reason for that. If anything those men should all be grey and bald already (and not because they are bald by airbending-choice) since science tells us that men age faster than women...
> 
> Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.

She spent three more months in this optimistic bubble, teaching one and later two days a week at the school and spending the days in between at home. Which, as the weeks pass, became increasingly more about resting as her pregnancy progressed.

She got to know the neighbors in the street, the vendors at the market and the regular performers at the central square. She is Lin to all of them. No one asked anymore why she was here or where she was from. No one asked about her strange shoes either, they all just assumed it was some earthbending thing.

In the newspapers she hadn’t seen anything about her disappearance either. It proved that she was right in thinking that maybe in Republic City her disappearance was big news, but here, in the Fire Nation, it really wasn’t. Only the bigger news events made it to the papers here – which apparently did include her and Tenzin’s break-up, according to Izumi. But five years was a long time, and luckily she hadn’t been recognized by anyone. Maybe her disappearance from Republic City had been part of the newspapers in the first week or two after she left, but by the time she had arrived in the Fire Nation the news value of it all had diminished. Her newsworthiness was entirely dependent on her being a part of the extend team Avatar family. By removing herself from that family, she was no longer interesting. 

She didn’t read much about the rest of her family in the paper either. Just that Bumi got promoted to general of the United Forces. Overall, that was a good thing. No family in the newspapers meant no big scandals and thus no trouble. How different would that have been if she had stayed and her pregnancy would have become noticeable. One way or another it would have leaked that Tenzin was the child’s father, and then the press would have had a field day reporting it.

Proof yet again, that it had been a good decision to leave. She was happy, her family was probably happy...it was a win-win situation, right?

And then there was her little Pebble. Who, despite staying on the small side, according to Sora, was steadily growing. It was a surreal experience. After the morning sickness had come the exhaustion, but also the strong yet almost rhythmic kicks of tiny baby feet, keeping her up at night. And then there was the weird cravings for watermelon with hot sauce. Every once in a while Lin caught herself wondering if her mother had the same experiences while being pregnant. But then she reminded herself that even if she could ask, Toph probably wouldn’t have answered in a normal way anyways.

The only thing Toph would always say when the topic came up, was how her pregnancies had been a burden to her, since they made it unable to work from a certain point onwards. If they were such an inconvenience, why did you have us then, Lin used to think. Although now, she understood better how not all pregnancies started out as planned.

Still, she would never share any of her discomforts of this pregnancy with her child.

With her little Pebble. It had been a working title that stuck. First she called the child a pebble because it really wasn’t much more than that yet. But as the child grew, it became a vessel to convey her attachment and love to the child.

Miyuki already jokingly asked if she wouldn’t just call the baby Pebble once born. Lin and Sora, who had been there as well, had simultaneously sent her a glare at that. Of course she wouldn’t.

But for now, Little Pebble worked just fine. There were two more months to go. She was going to have one more week at work before taking leave and she found she was actually quite looking forward to it. She had decided on a baby name already and could focus on rearranging her room to be suited for the baby. A domestic desire she never thought herself capable of having.

And then one morning she opened the newspaper, and it all came crashing down.

..

“She didn’t even show up.”

It was a cold night at the South Pole that seemed so much more freezing cold than others. Kya looked up from where two polar dog pups were playing in the snow when she heard the angry trembling in her mother’s voice.

“At least Su was there.” Kya tried.

“But he _loved_ her, Kya. And she loved _him_. And she couldn’t even bother to show up at his funeral!” Katara spat out. “And Suyin being here as a visiting guest is all wrong as well. She was supposed to become Chief now. Or at least have the possibility to decide whether she would want to. We all know she is his daughter, regardless of Toph’s refusal to acknowledge it. She just wanted to keep her daughters to herself. It’s so selfish. And look what good it did. Su was sent away in her teens and Lin had disappeared from the face of the earth!”

Kya frowned at her mother’s words. It wasn’t uncharacteristic for her mother to have an outburst like this, but it didn’t happen often either. She moved to wrap her mother in a tight embrace. “I know you’re hurting mom. I am too. But don’t take it all out on Toph. Besides, we don’t know why Lin left.” She mumbled.

Katara sighed. “Whatever it was, the way Toph treated those girls, _especially_ Lin, played a role for sure. Sokka always went out of his way to make Lin and Suyin feel better. But Toph would never really let him. Even now she refused to continue to search for Lin any longer. She rather denies that any of it happened, so that she does not have to deal with any of it, than that she looked after Sokka’s wellbeing. He was sick with worry the past few months. That certainly did his health no favor, and now he is gone.” Katara answered stubbornly, before biting back a sob as she rested her head on her daughter’s shoulder.

“Let today not be about aunt Toph, Mom. Let today be about Sokka.” Kya said softly and her mother nodded.

They let go of their embrace when they heard the front door open and saw Suyin standing in the doorway with puffy eyes from recent tears.

“Aunt Katara, I was wondering if you could make some calming tea? I - I don’t think I can sleep tonight without it.” Her voice trembled and Katara nodded, placing a hand on Suyin’s shoulder and giving it a soft squeeze as she walked past her on her way to the kitchen, with Kya following.

The two women watched in silence as Katara went to work.

“I should have visited more often.” Suyin said eventually. “He was always there for me when I was younger. And I didn’t even come and visit once he got sick.”

Kya looked over to Suyin and wondered if Toph might have ever talked to Suyin about who Sokka was to her. “He fell ill so sudden, Su. And you were in the middle of the desert looking for Lin. You wouldn’t have made it on time anyways. Don’t blame yourself.”

“But still...” Suyin countered. “If only Lin wouldn’t have disappeared….If only _mom_ would not have refused to continue looking for her… then I wouldn’t have been out in the desert, looking for my ungrateful sister. I only did it for Sokka’s sake, you know. And then it was all for nothing.” She fell silent again, biting her lip before she continued in a much quieter voice. “I feel so alone now, without uncle Sokka, without Lin...”

Kya couldn’t help but scoff a little at the contradictions in Su’s confessions. The Beifong women weren’t one for uncomplicated feelings, that was for sure. “You just called your sister ungrateful and you and Lin hadn’t really talked for over 15 years. Every celebration you both attended, you would make sure to never have to speak to each other.”

“But I always tried to follow where she was and what she was doing.” Suyin muttered. “I would always feel her presence through the ground. I was just waiting for the right moment to fix things between us. And then she was gone. And now uncle Sokka is too. And mom...mom just comes and goes as she pleases. Like she always did, and...” Suyin didn’t finish, but Kya understood.

The tea was finished and Katara turned to pour the hot steaming liquid in three little cups. “We are your family too, Suyin. And we are always there for you, like I hope you and your family are there for us.” Katara spoke softly and Suyin smiled a grateful smile.

“I know, auntie Katara. And we are. I wouldn’t know what I would do without you. If we hadn’t been able to come here every now and then when Lin and I were little, things might have turned out much worse.”

“Well, Lin is gone. I would say that is pretty bad already.” Kya remarked.

Katara frowned. “Such gloominess doesn’t suit you, sweetheart.”

“My favorite uncle died today and my friend has disappeared and by now we can most probably say that she is not going to return. I am allowed to be gloomy every now and then.” Kya countered before reaching for her tea and taking a sip.

She winced as the liquid that was still much too hot burned her tongue. Her head turned to the door as she heard Tenzin entering the kitchen. He looked as miserable and tired as the rest of them.

“Ah, I came to make some tea for me and Pema, but I see you already beat me to it. On top of everything else the baby is kicking so much at night that Pema hardly catches any sleep these nights.” He spoke.

Kya got up at that and retreated to her room. The last thing she needed right now was to hear her little brother lamenting over his perfect little family.

“What a mess..” She muttered to herself.

..

She was actually on her way out to Sora’s when she saw it. With only eight more weeks to go, the pregnancy was starting to become tough on her body and Sora had offered to give her a massage in some healing water to ease her discomfort. That morning it had been particularly bad, with sharp shooting pains running through her lower back and the pain even radiating all the way through her upper legs.

She hadn’t expected to find anything even remotely interesting in the newspaper. She checked it routinely, having picked up that habit in the first weeks in the city, when she was still afraid that she might be in it.

So she was absolutely, in no way, not even a little bit prepared for the large photo of Uncle Sokka staring back at her on page two. And she was even less prepared for the text below it.

She felt as if the wind was knocked out of her and there wasn’t any oxygen left to refill her lungs with. Her ears started ringing and everything around her faded as her mind stopped working. She kept staring at the picture, at the text, without really registering what it said. Trembling hands turned the page and glazed over eyes then moved to the calendar on the wall to check the date.

Oh. It had happened two days ago. Oh, the ceremony was today – and she wasn’t there.

She hadn’t been there when he was ill, she hadn’t been there when he died. She wasn’t there now to pay her respect to him. And why?

Because she had to get away so badly. Because she couldn’t bare being the cause of such a scandal to her family. Because she couldn’t bare having to face the disappointment of her uncle once he would hear the news…

Did she leave for the sake of her family? Or did she actually leave for her own sake? Could it be both? And who really benefited from it all? For the first time she felt true regret over her decision to leave.

Her uncle had died and she hadn’t been there. After all that he did for her. All the birthdays, celebrations and recitals he had attended when she was little. After all those times he would take her with him on his boat when he saw how she was suffocating - first fromt the pressure that her mother put on her, later under the weight of the responsibility she felt for her sister when her mother did not. She didn’t even have to say anything to him about how she felt, he could read her like a book. He would talk to Toph on her behalf – to no avail of course, but at least he tried. He cared.

And this wass how she repaid him. By not being there.

Then again. Did it matter? The rest of her family surely was there. Where she only brought him trouble and caused him to fight with Toph, whom he loved, the rest of the family had brought him joy. His sister whom he liked to tease; uncle Zuko with whom he liked to have conversations about the future, the past and everything in between until well into the early hours of the morning; his nephews and niece who he treated as his own children. And then there was Suyin…who was like a daughter to him. Who _was_ his daughter.

Lin wasn’t even sure Suyin herself knew. Toph had never meant to tell anyone, although everyone had their suspicions, even Suyin. It had slipped from her mother’s lips when Lin had once again touched the topic of her own father. She had only been sixteen at the time. She had been pressing her mother on the question why she didn’t want to tell anything about her father besides his – very ordinary – name and origin in the Fire Nation. Toph kept evading it. Lin kept pressing. Until finally Toph yelled that it didn’t matter, because she wouldn’t allow her father to be part of Lin’s life anyways. Just like she didn’t allow Sokka to be a part of Suyin’s life either. They were _her_ daughters and hers alone.

The silence that followed had lasted for hours, or so it had felt as Lin’s sixteen year old brain had tried to process all the information that had been in that one outburst. Sokka was Suyin’s father. Her mother was insensitive and to be honest also a little crazy. Her mother was possessive, and…insecure? Her mother…loved them so much she didn’t want to share them?...Her mother…

She hadn’t been able to finish those thoughts as Toph had threatened to disown her if she would ever tell Suyin or anyone else what she had just heard. And by the look on her mother’s face and the vibrations in the earth, Lin knew her mother meant it. So much for her mother loving her…Her mother did not love her. Her mother only loved herself. And the fear of a secret getting out was bigger than the price of threatening her own daughter with being disowned.

Lin had tried to create some distance between herself and Uncle Sokka from that moment onwards. Sokka of course noticed, but he never confronted her with it, he let her have her space. And that of course made her all the more grateful towards him. Made her love him even more. Uncle Sokka was Suyin’s father, but secretly, Lin thought of him as her own father too. Even though he did not know it.

And now he was gone.

Another jolt of pain shooting through her lower back brought Lin somewhat back to her present state of mind.

She had to get to Sora.

Uncharacteristically slow steps brought her to her front door and then unto the street. Unfocused eyes stared at the road in front of her. Her mind kept showing her images of her uncle as she walked.

“Watch it! – Oh spirits, I am sorry Miss. Are you alright? You shouldn’t just turn a corner like that without paying attention. Miss? – Miss, are you alright? Did I hurt you?”

It really wasn’t that bad of a collision. Just some guy with a cart full of vegetables who bumped into her on the side walk as she rounded the corner.

The blow had pushed her back into the wall with stones uncomfortably pressing into her back. But it wasn’t much more than that. She hardly felt it. In any case she really didn’t think it was worth the number of bystanders and the worried expression on the man’s face.

With her mind still not fully focused on where she was, she tried to engage in the conversation the man was trying to have with her as he was asking her if she was feeling alright.

“I am fine.” She brushed it off, and when he suggested he would take her to a healer she shook her head. “I really am fine, it probably looked worse than it felt – If it makes you feel any better, I am headed to my friend, just one block away from here, she is a healer.”

“Your head is bleeding, miss.” The man countered.

Slowly Lin reached to touch the back of her head, and felt the wet sticky feeling of blood mixed with tangled hair. Oh, to her surprise she found he was right.

“Just a sharp stone sticking out, probably. A bit of bad luck.” She shrugged. “Again, it looks worse than it was. I am fine.” She was really was. She really didn’t feel anything, to the extent that she almost felt…numb.

“Alright…if you say so, Miss..” The guy hesitated.

“I do say so.” She was losing her patience. She just wanted to get to Sora.

Finally he let her go and she continued her way. With every step she set however, it felt as if her shoes were filled with led instead of just having platinum soles. Her breathing grew labored as the shooting pains in her back returned. This time following each other in a faster rhythm and spreading towards her stomach.

Something wet trickled down her leg. Was that more blood? No, it wasn’t red. More like water.

That wasn’t right though either, was it?

The next jolt of pain finally drew Lin out of her dazed state of mind as it dawned on her what was going on – what had been going on _all morning_ already. And what had most likely been triggered even more by the collision she just had– on second thought she did feel the wound at the back of her head throbbing painfully and the muscles of her neck protesting as she had been slammed into the wall from the blow which much more force than she had initially registered.

Panic rose, constricting her throat as she tried to pick up her pace, closing the last few meters to her friend’s house.

A whimper escaped her through gritted teeth as she reached the front door and frantically started knocking on it. Panicked thoughts swirling through her mind, pushing the guilt she felt over Sokka’s death to the side as they were replaced with guilt over not realizing sooner that her child was in distress.

Finally Sora opened the door, the annoyed expression on her face changing in one of shock and horror as she took in the sight in front of her.

“Hi, I think I have been having contractions all morning and my water just broke and that was not yet supposed to happen. So you really need to help me, because I cannot lose this baby.” Lin blurted out, and it was the last sane thing she was able to say before a wave of pain suddenly washed over her, leaving her breathless and doubled over in pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more thing:
> 
> I don't think that Toph disappeared from the face of the earth immediately after she went on her search for 'enlightenment'. Especially since she has to make things right between Suyin and herself somewhere before LoK starts and she is younger (or in any case less old) when she first leaves as opposed to when we meet her in LoK. The level of estrangement from her family Toph has created for herself when we meet her again in LoK is one of the kind that grows over time. Seeing as we are almost twelve years pre-LoK right now, I think she might occassionally have been in touch with her family. 
> 
> And precisely because we are at this point in time: twelve years before LoK, but a good 17 years since 'the incident' between Lin and Suyin happened - I think that Suyin has had the chance already to come to terms with what has happened, to see her own role in it and to grow up and change - she has a husband, she has kids now. She made things somewhat alright with her mother.  
> Whereas stubborn, old Lin is just struggling with her own inner demons still, and really feels like Suyin and her mother should be the ones to apologize first, and then she will see what she makes of it.
> 
> And I don't think Suyin has had NO contact whatsoever with Lin over the past 17 years. It is never really specified in LoK if the two sisters never, ever spoke or saw each other up until the point we meet Suyin in the series - and tbh I don't think it very realistic to assume that they didn't. They are part of the same extended family, there must have been some occasions where they at least must have seen one another from the other side of a very large room. 
> 
> That is why I wrote Suyin the way I did in this chapter: missing her sister dearly on the one hand, while also being angry with her and not understanding Lin's motives at all on the other. And that is also why I wrote Suyin as being incredibly worried about Lin's disappearance in the previous chapter, and why I wrote Suyin talking to Toph about this - even though Toph had started her search for enlightenment by then already.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I am making up for the cliffhanger of last time by giving you a chapter full of fluff this time (and I also threw a little bit of Toph in there).  
> Also, you all have know idea how this fanfiction is expanding my knowledge on so many random things. I now know more about how telephones and radios actually work (the reason why I needed to know that will become clear later on) and I also know now that the first incubator was only invented around 1880 and oxygen was only discovered in 1772. Before that, scientiest didn't really know what the 'genuine use' of respiration was - which I think is so logical to wonder about if you don't know oxygen exists yet, but is also hilarious!  
> Anyways, thanks to everyone who commented on the last chapter again. I love reading what you think about this story, as it really motivates me and inspires me to write more :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

Giving birth was something Lin had not exactly looked forward to, but she hadn’t been afraid of it either. It would be painful, but she was sure she could handle it.

Giving birth at 30 weeks instead of 40 was a completely different story however. Although, she had very little time to truly worry about it, since she had very little understanding of what was going on around her exactly.

After the initial shock of finding Lin in distress at her doorstep, Sora had her lying down in her practice in no time. And somehow Sora had also managed to send word to Miyuki who was at the school, because suddenly Miyuki was there, together with another woman Lin didn’t know.

Much more thought on who this person was, she couldn’t spare either, as her entire mental capacity was focused on her child. A string of mumbled pleas for her baby to hold on left her lips in a mantra as she swallowed and flinched her way through every new contraction, desperately trying to suppress them – no contractions meant no labor, right? – until Sora told her to stop doing that.

A sob escaped her when the healer told her that this baby was coming, if they liked it or not.

Then everything happened so very fast. She breathed, she pushed, she cried, she gritted her teeth, she squeezed Miyuki’s hand as if her life depended on it, she breathed some more and then it was over. The pressure on her lower back and around her stomach was gone, a deep sigh left her lungs and the four adults in the room were enveloped in utter silence.

Lin wanted to ask how it could be so silent, needed to know why it was _so_ silent. But a paralyzing fear prevented her lips from forming the words. The unknown woman and Sora had moved away from her with her child immediately after the umbilical chord was cut, while Miyuki stayed by Lin’s side. She felt Miyuki’s eyes on her but didn’t meet them, instead she continued to stare up at the ceiling, paralyzed by fear and not daring to fully breathe or do _anything_ for that matter until that damned silence had been broken.

It took ages and her lower lip started to tremble dangerously as her resolve slowly started to waiver. And then there it was – a cry. And Lin felt her heart breaking and tears freely streaming down her cheeks at the incredibly delicate and frail sound coming from underdeveloped lungs.

She wanted to see her child, but she still didn’t dare to speak. Afraid that every word spoken would be a distraction to Sora and the other woman, who were still tending to her child. She trusted them completely, but it killed her that she hadn’t even caught a glimpse of her baby yet. The thought of it alone caused another wave of sobs to wash over her, the impact of that morning and the hormones amplifying her emotions. And when Miyuki started to gently stroke lose strands of hair, wet from sweat and tears, out of her face, Lin let her.

“Don’t be afraid, Lin.” Miyuki whispered, breaking the spell of concentration and silence. “She will be alright, I just know it.”

 _She_. A daughter then, of course it was – once a Beifong… Opening her eyes, Lin looked at Miyuki. “Can I hold her?”

“I don’t know, Lin.” Miyuki mumbled hesitantly, looking over her shoulders to Sora and the other woman. Following Miyuki’s gaze, Lin saw the other woman was clearly also a healer. She had taken a tool out of the bag that was standing next to her that looked very much akin to a small bellows. Fear gripped again around her heart as Lin realized it was to help the baby breathe. In the meantime Sora was continuously bending water.

“Or at least see her then?” She pleaded, to which the unknown woman nodded and changed position, so that Lin could now also see that Sora was enveloping the entire child in water, safe for her nose and mouth.

Her breath caught in her throat as she laid eyes on her baby for the first time. Her _daughter_ – who was much too small, quiet and weak and who wasn’t at all supposed to be here already. But here she was, and Lin felt her chest almost explode at the intense feeling of love, protectiveness and marvel that washed over her.

“She is a fighter, Lin,” Sora spoke over her shoulder. “And she is in good hands. Kana here is a healer specialized in treating children and babies. I am keeping her temperature constant through bending and Kana is making sure she gets enough air. We’ll get her through this. Both of you.”

Lin didn’t know how to respond. Scepsis made her wanting to scoff at that, hope made her want to agree. Exhausted, she briefly closed her eyes. A mistake, because she almost immediately felt a fog taking over in her mind, and when she opened her eyes again, her vision remained black around the edges.

Blinking excessively she tried to stay awake. But it seemed as if her body had waited for her to make sure that her baby would be alright, and now that she had, it was demanding its rest. The last thing she heard before slipping into unconsciousness was Miyuki telling her to stay awake. But she really couldn’t…

..

Deep into swamps of the Earth Kingdom, where the day had already come to an end, Toph Beifong stirred in her sleep. A pained frown appeared on her tired and aged face, before jolted awake, the name of her eldest daughter on her lips.

In an instant she stood next to her bed, feet connecting to the earth and she crouched down so that her hands could touch the spirit vines. She expected it to be to no avail, and was about to lift her hands when she suddenly felt the slightest tremble, the slightest hint of her daughter’s familiar heartbeat coming from miles and miles away.

It was weak and unsteady. So unsteady, in fact, that Toph started to doubt if it really was the heartbeat of her strong, steady, headstrong daughter that she was picking up. If anything, Lin wasn’t in the Earth Kingdom anymore, the signal was much too unstable for that, meaning the ocean was interfering. One of the Air Temples then? The hostile environment of the North Pole? – that would at least clarify the weak heartbeat. Or the Fire Nation?

She couldn’t tell. The signal was just too weak and unstable. Was Lin in danger? Was that why she had woken up so suddenly? Unease washed over Toph as she returned to her cod and lied down on her back, thinking what her next move should be.

She would wait a until the night was over, she eventually decided. In hindsight a gross mistake, she realized the next day. The night before she had picked up the signal every now and then, its pulse increasingly erratic. The next day, it was gone again.

She had either imagined it to be there yesterday, or Lin had made herself invisible again. That there was a third possibility, that something horrible and irreversible had happened to her daughter, Toph didn’t dare to think. It didn’t feel like that scenario had become reality. Surely as a mother – even a lousy one like she had been – would know if their child was in mortal danger, right?

She didn’t dare to inform Suyin, Katara or the others about what had happened either – not after missing Sokka’s funeral – it had simply been too painful – and they would only get angry with her for not having mentioned this sooner. Now it was too late. Even if what she had felt, indicated that Lin really was staying in the Fire Nation, it would still be almost impossible to find her. Or in any case, it would take months. Months that no one really had time for – except for Toph herself maybe. But the thing was, somewhere deep down, Toph knew – or feared – that Lin’s disappearance had something to do with her as well. And she wasn’t quite sure whether Lin _wanted_ to be found, least of all by her mother.

Toph knew she hadn’t been mother of the year to her daughters – and she wasn’t sure either if she could ever make up for that. She tried with Suyin, but the relationship remained awkward at best. So if she could do Lin a favor by staying away, then that was the least she could do…right?

Besides, they had already more or less searched the Fire Nation when Lin had first disappeared. To no avail. They had visited the capital, the islands, the beaches, the other cities – But even if Lin really was there, it was very much possible that they had visited the very town where Lin had been hiding, and still hadn’t found her – she would have been laying low the first few weeks, and the modern cities of the Fire Nation were simply too perfectly chaotic to disappear into.

“Wherever you are, kiddo, I hope you found what you are looking for.” Toph sighed.

..

It had been three weeks since Lin gave birth. Three weeks didn’t seem a lot of time, but for a premature baby they were of invaluable worth.

Lin had woken up two days after the whole ordeal in the hospital. Her baby had been next to her in a box-like contraption that, she learned later, regulated her temperature and breathing.

Kana had said the two of them had been lucky, to which Lin had arched an eyebrow and Miyuki had scoffed that she would hardly call the situation one of luck.

Kana had sent them an unimpressed and calm look at that. Something that oddly had given Lin comfort. Although to her, the situation seemed hopeless, this woman was not panicking. She knew what she was doing.

“Babies who are born this early usually have far more complications.” Kana had explained. “With this baby we only have to continuously regulate her temperature and assist her lungs with breathing. I am confident that in three to four weeks, she will have learned to do both by herself. For now, we help her through this breathing ventilator.”

Lin was quite impressed by the technology behind it all. Apparently a young inventor from the Northern Water Tribe, called Varrick, had come up with a temperature-regulating box. There was a shortage of healers in the Northern Watertribe, and when people at the North Pole got sick, the healers that were left couldn’t always prevent all their patients from falling victim to hypothermia at the same time in the cold environment. Hence the invention of the box, that later on was developed to also include a breathing mechanism.

Quite a marvelous invention. The only downside being that her child could not be released from the box until she at least was able to breathe on her own. And that meant, that Lin still hadn’t held her baby, which pained her greatly.

Her daughter was a fighter though, and already after three weeks, she was able to breathe fully on her own. That was ahead of the curve, and Lin silently wondered if that had anything to do with her father being an airbender. It was a question she could not voice of course – not to the healers in the hospital anyways. To Sora and Miyuki, she did voice her thoughts however. Because that was another development from the past three weeks.

Two days after she had woken up, Lin had been staring out the window of her room when Miyuki and Sora had entered. The two women had been joking about something, judging from their elevated voices that Lin had already been able to hear from far and the bright smiles on their face.

Sora had been the first to grow serious again once she saw Lin’s expression – Lin wasn’t very good anymore these days in hiding her true state of mind.

Miyuki had noticed it too. “What is causing you to have such a pained look on your face, Lin? Your daughter is doing great, the healers say so themselves, try not to worry too much, although I know that is easier said than done.”

“I blame myself for what happened.” The confession had left her lips without effort as her conviction in its truth was strong.

“Lin, you shouldn’t do that.” Sora had countered as she went to sit at the edge of the bed near Lin’s feet. “All the healers, myself included, agree that there was nothing you did or could have done to cause this. Sometimes these things just happen.”

“But on the street…I bumped into this guy with his vegetable cart..” Lin had mumbled.

“Well, that was unfortunate and didn’t help, but it was not what caused the contractions to start in the first place.” Sora’s tone of voice had been strong and determined, in an attempt to get through to Lin.

“Although, you might want to look out a little better next time when you round a corner. It is nothing like you to be so lost in thoughts.” Miyuki had joked. “What were you thinking about anyways?”

“I read something that day…someone important to me passed away…it rattled me.” Lin had struggled, unable to fully disclose the details for it would give away her identity, but wanting to give her friends as true an answer as possible nonetheless.

“You mean the passing away of your uncle Sokka?”

Lin’s head had whipped up to look at Sora with wide eyes at her remark. She was met by the waterbender’s dark blue eyes and arched eyebrow staring back at her – challenging her.

“What? – No! – I mean –“ For a former detective, her reaction to her cover being blown had been rather poorly. Then again, she had just given birth and had been unconscious for two days, that left its mark. “How did you find out?” Lin had eventually whispered, ignoring Miyuki’s gasp as she confirmed Sora’s suspicion.

Sora had shrugged. “Fire Fountain City and the Fire Nation as a whole might be focused mainly on internal affairs, but the Water Tribes have a wider focus. I still receive the Northern Gazette. I read about your disappearance from Republic City, there was a picture as well. Your attempt to disguise yourself is admirable, and it was clever to settle in a city of this size. I didn’t make the connection right away, but your eyes and the scar on your cheek gave you away in the end.”

At that Lin had told her story to the two women. Not in every detail, but citing the strained relationship with her mother and the fact that the last thing she wanted to do was break up the family of the man who was to repopulate the Air Nation, as reasons for leaving. “Besides, not everything was a lie. My father really is supposed to be from the Fire Nation and I really do hope to find him one day.” Lin mumbled in an uncharacteristic timid tone of voice. “And, I hope you can forgive me for not telling you the truth before…I would understand if you don’t want anything to do with me anymore and –“

She had been interrupted by Miyuki who had practically thrown herself at her and pulled her into a tight hug, whispering that _of_ _course_ she was forgiven.

Lin found it was a relief that the two people closest to her in her new life now knew who she really was. It allowed her to relax just a little bit more when she was around them.

While thinking all of this over, Lin was pulled out of her musings when the door to her hospital room opened, revealing Kana. Lin’s eyes lit up upon seeing the woman holding a tiny bundle of blankets.

Kana smiled. “Her temperature is still something we have to regulate manually, but we have come to the point that we can do that now by just adding enough layers and blankets. The little lady is already breathing on her own, thus the time had finally come to free her from her ventilation box.”

Stretching her arms out towards Kana, Lin couldn’t help but smile the brightest smile she had ever smiled. “Give her to me, please. I feel like I will explode from anticipation if I have to wait another second.” Lin breathed.

Kana chuckled as she carefully placed the bundle of blankets in Lin’s arms. And as she did, Lin let out a whimper in awe upon seeing her baby daughter snuggly wrapped in the fabric. _Finally_ she was holding her daughter.

Lin didn’t notice Kana leaving the room, and she had no idea how much time was passing by as she stared at the baby in her arms. Her daughter. Who weighed next to nothing, and was smaller than any baby she had ever seen, but who was absolutely perfect nonetheless.

A few days ago, her baby had finally opened her eyes for the first time and now bright green orbs, so similar to her own, were staring back at her. Downy dark hair graced her tiny face and Lin gasped when her little girl managed to wriggle an arm free from its containment and a tiny hand reached up to her.

Bringing her hand to meet the one of her daughter, tiny fingers in a skin tone slightly darker than her own wrapped around her finger. Warmth spread through Lin’s chest at the contact. Her daughter was perfect. The touch was such a simple gesture. Just _looking_ at her daughter was so simple and it made everything else in the world fade away. All the complications, all hesitations, all of the worries and the conflicts, it all disappeared. It all become clear, pure and uncomplicated.

“Once I knew you were coming, you seemed to have made everything so very complicated, little pebble.” Lin whispered to her child, whose gaze fixated on her mother at the sound of her voice.

“But now that you are here, I see I was wrong, and it is quite the opposite. It is just about the two of us. Nothing more and nothing less. You make everything clear and simple. So perhaps that is what I should call you then, don’t you think? Little baby _Jun Beifong_. What do you think of that?”

The girl let out a tiny, squeaky yawn in response and Lin chuckled as she cradled the girl to her chest. Basking in the feeling of finally having her daughter, her baby, her Jun, in her arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was super scared to upload this chapter! Your comments on the last chapter were so kind-And I am so afraid that you are all going to hate the slight twist I now gave the story, haha. So pleaaaase let me know what you think of this!  
> At the same time, I really thought this through, so I do stand behind I decision I made here. Am just curious what you all will think if it :).  
> I also wrote this entire chapter on my phone, so I am sorry for more typos than usual :-|.  
> Best,
> 
> Metope

“Kid, would you stop looking at me like that?”

She received a squeal and big green eyes squinting in delight in response, to which she raised an eyebrow, trying her hardest to give her most unimpressed and stern look.

Little feet softly kicked against her stomach, and chubby little arms waived through the air in search of something - preferably her mother’s hair - to grab onto.

“You just puked all over me. You could have the decency to at least _look_ sorry about it.” Lin grumbled, before her stern look transformed in a laughing one as she looked at her five month old baby daughter.

It was a lazy morning. Before Jun, she didn’t do lazy mornings. But now they were her favorite - though if anyone would ask, she would fervently deny.

A lazy morning which she spent in bed, knees pulled up enough so that a pillow could rest against it, on which her baby daughter was lying.

A lot had happened over the past four months since she had left the hospital with her daughter. Two months ago she went back to work at the school again while Sora looked after Jun.

She had only been working for a week again when the school head master asked her if she would consider working full time at the school as a counselor for the more “unruly” kids, who were being too much trouble in class. Or rather, whom the teachers didn’t know how to handle. Usually, there was something else causing such behaviour. Bullying, trouble at home, the wrong kind of friends - you really just needed to find the right key to get them to talk. And if there was anything that Lin knew how to do, it was finding that key. After all, wasn’t that what being a detective had been all about as well? 

That hadn’t gone unnoticed by the head master either and he promised she could bring Jun to the daycare adjacent to the school when she was working. 

Lin had hesitated initially. She loved working, and she loved working at the school more than she could have imagined. And she felt she really could _mean_ something here, and for these kids. If these kids would start to feel better at school, would fit in better, there was less chance that they would derail later on. And that meant less crime. She liked the idea of being able to contribute to that.

But Lin also remembered how much she hated it that her mother had never been there for her when she was little, always working. However, she also wanted to be an example for her daughter. Showing her that it was possible to both be a decent mother - of being a _good_ mother she could only dream - and have a job. So, in the end, she agreed - but with the firm demands that she would not work late, and if her child needed her, she would put her first.

That had been agreeable to the school, and soLin suddenly found herself having a real job again. And with a real job, came a real salary, and with a real salary....she could afford to rent an apartment of her own.

So here she was now, in her own apartment, with her own daughter. Her five month old daughter, who didn’t look the part of a five month old baby at all. She was tiny and she hadn’t even started to learn how to roll over yet.  


At first that had worried Lin, until Kana reassured her and told her that that was not abnormal for premature babies. Her baby might be five months on this earth now, but nearly two of those months she _should_ have spent in the womb still, making her in fact only three months old. And for a three month old, she was right in schedule.

Right on schedule, and _wonderful_ , if you asked Lin. Her baby was a perfect mixture of the world. Her green eyes giving away that she was a Beifong of earth kingdom decent. Her wispy hair equally black as that of Lin’s but less curly, more like Toph’s hair. Together with the blankets and baby clothes in traditional fire nation colours, it had allowed her to blend right in as a fire nation baby.  


Her skin tone was slightly darker than Lin’s own, giving away that she was the granddaughter of Katara and Sokka. That was also something Lin found herself to be incredibly moved by. At the end of the day, Sokka had been her father, but one with whom she never had a real biological connection, not like Su had....up until now. 

Her daughter was tiny, because of her premature birth, but also because how she was build. It reminded her of Aang and of how Jinora had been as a baby as well - at least from what she could tell the handful of times she had seen the girl. And then there was that specific look her daughter could give her: observing, analysing without judging like all babies did, but with a certain calmness and patience resting in her eyes that Lin had only ever seen in one other pair of eyes.

The first time she had seen it, her stomach had churned and she had suddenly felt an incredible sadness. It suddenly felt all so wrong that she was here, alone with Jun, without Tenzin. Without the rest of her baby’s family.

But then again, she wanted what was best for her child and for her family. And staying in Republic City, where the press would have made her “ _that_ child” would definitely not have been the best for anyone.

It had been a surprise to Lin however to discover how strong her feelings for Tenzin still were. Even after all that had happened, everything _both_ of them had done wrong...and then even after that terrible move _he_ had made. Although in hindsight she couldn’t call that a terrible move either, it had given her Jun after all. And she should have known better that night. He hadn’t been in his right mind. Confused and sad, not only about seeing his marriage potentially fall apart, but along with it, the crumbling of his self-proclaimed duty to revive the air nation. She could only hope that one day, he would realise there is more in the world than carrying his parents’ legacy.  


Then again, hadn’t Lin been just the same? It had taken an unplanned pregnancy and the horrific prospect of breaking up a young family with the press watching her every move, to realise that she didn’t have to walk in her mother’s footsteps at all costs...

And thus, Lin embraced her new life and her new roles as a mother and a teacher. As someone who had friends, and would be available to go to dinner or to go to a bar - if she could find a babysitter - with said friends because she wasn’t working all the time. As someone who was respected in her community. As someone of whom people still thought as stern, serious and private, but with whom people also liked to have a chat with in the park, who was invited to dinner. It made her feel respected and liked as a person, as _Lin_ , and not just as the daughter of the Chief of police 

And in the meantime she got to marvel over her own daughter. Who taught her so much while she learned to navigate the big scary world. More than once Lin had doubted herself as a mother. Like all mothers do, apparently, but Lin wondered if all mothers had had Toph Beifong for a mother. Probably not. With everything she did, she found herself weighing it against what she thought Toph would have done in the same situation. It was exhausting. And it would most likely have broken her if Miyuki hadn’t interfered.  


She had never shared in detail what the problems with her mother were about. But Toph had been a public figure long enough for Miyuki to be able to guess and be close to the truth.

  
“Lin,” she had sighed one night. “I just gave you a compliment about how you handled Jun when she is having such a difficult day as today, and you _say_ thank you, but I can see you beating yourself up over some crazy lie you made yourself believe. So why don’t you just share it with me so I can talk it out of your head?”  


Lin let out a scoff before leaning against the doorframe that led to her kitchen, wrapping her arms around her waist in support. “It is nothing, Miyuki. I am fine. - I really am.” She added when Miyuki raised an eyebrow at her.

“Kids have bad days sometimes, Lin. That’s just the way it is. And when you are stern with them, or discipline them, that is only good. They won’t hate you when you do it. And you aren’t a bad mother when you do it . In fact, it shows that you love your daughter and that you want her to learn and grow. That is how raising a child works. By being consistent in loving your child, teaching your child about what can and cannot be done, what is good and bad, right and wrong. You are doing that, Lin.” 

Lin had given a short nod in response before changing the topic. But Miyuki’s words lingered. _By being consistent._ That was what had lacked with Toph. She was never consistent. Not when it came to being there, nor in her reactions to Lin and Su. It all depended on how tired she was and how hard the day had been, Lin later learned. But as a child, she of course hadn’t known that and it had made her calculating and apprehensive about how her mother would react when she did something - be it something good or something bad.

But Lin wasn’t like that, or at least she hoped she wasn’t and it meant a lot that Miyuki had just said as much all by herself.

From that moment on, Lin felt more at ease in her role as a mother, and she managed to worry less and enjoy it more as her daughter discovered the world. As she took her first steps. As she said her first word - that being rock, which Lin refused to see as a clear sign that the girl was going to be an earth bender, no matter what Miyuki or Sora would say. She worried when Jun caught a cold for the first time, and she swore to never forgive herself when the girl tumbled off the couch once because Lin was momentarily distracted - but she was able to get over it, determining to do better from that moment on, instead of beating herself up over it.

Lin was amazed by how carefree and happy Jun always seemed to be, making Lin feel happy and a little more carefree as well - to the point that one day, she even dared to leave her platinum shoes behind, wearing sandals instead. Jun had just had her second birthday and Lin really doubted that anyone would be looking for her still. 

Her daughter had become a feisty toddler now. Wrapping every new person she met around her finger, being able to keep herself entertained with a toy for hours - that was all Tenzin - but also able to throw massive temper tantrums if she wanted to - that was _definitely_ all her. 

June continued to grow and develop just fine, but hadn’t shown any signs of bending yet. And if Lin was completely honest, she was fine with that. Bending toddlers were so much more difficult to handle, and her daughter in her terrible twos proved to be a handful already as it was - and she _really_ wasn’t going soft on her own child when it came to following the rules and behaviour, so that meant something.

In hindsight, Lin realised her daughter had in fact already been bending at two. She just hadn’t noticed it, brushing the occasional oddity - a microphone starting to screech for no reason, a radio losing its connection - off as mere malfunctioning. 

The fact that her daughter seemed to pick up on every song playing in the radio, even if Lin hadn’t picked up on the sound yet, she attributed to her daughter having a good ear for music. Her daughter‘s fascination with her radio was just a phase, Lin assumed, and her dislike for the park around the energy factory was equally random.

Until one afternoon, Lin and Miyuki were standing in the town hall discussing whether the venue would suffice to hold a fundraising event for the school later that month.

“Well, it isn’t a very appealing space, but at least all the technical stuff is available?” Miyuki tried to sound optimistic, but Lin frowned.

Yes, there were two microphones here, a radio and some speakers. But the building was old, the walls were in need of some new paint and there was a complete lack of decoration.  


Jun, who she had been balancing on her hip until then, clearly disliked the room as well and started to wiggle in her mother’s arms. “Down! Down!” She demanded. Just having turned three she hadn’t quite gotten to speaking full sentences yet, but she had become the typical headstrong three year old all the same.

“Alright. But you have to stay here, alright? This won’t take long.” Lin gave in, putting her daughter down. 

The girl nodded with a mischievous glint in her eyes and as soon as she thought her mother didn’t pay attention to her anymore she made a beeline for the door. Without turning around, but with a slight tap of her foot, Lin bent a rock in front of the door so that her daughter couldn’t get out anymore. 

“Oh that’s sneaky of you, Lin.” Miyuki grinned and Lin smirked as they heard the indignant huff of the three year old. 

Lin shrugged. “She is going through a phase where she is testing her limits again. Then I have to provide those limits, don’t I? Otherwise there is nothing to test.” 

Laughing, Miyuki and Lin continued their conversation. For a while Jun managed to entertain herself in the big room by running from one side to the other. But that too started to bore the girl after a while. So she started to try to get her mother’s attention again. First by pulling at the fabric of Lin’s jacket. Then by softly calling her mother.

Lin turned to her left and lovingly ran a hand through Jun’s long loose raven-black hair as she crouched down to be at the same eye level as her daughter. 

“Yes Jun, I know you are bored but you have to be patient. We will only be five more minutes, that is not long at all, okay?” 

“Want to play.” The girl pouted in an accusatory tone of voice which made Lin chuckle a little. 

“When I am done, we will go to the playground for a bit before going home. Alright?”

That seemed to appease the girl and Lin continued her conversation with Miyuki. 

“We should test the microphone and speakers. To see if we can use them.” Miyuki said and Lin nodded as they moved to the stage that was build on one side of the hall.

It took the women a moment to figure out how turn the speakers and microphone on and it didn’t help that Jun started to call “Mamaaaaa!” loudly through the room.

“Jun! Stop that!” Lin’s voice was sharp and stern and she saw her daughter startle and abruptly quit her shouting.

“Found it!” Miyuki then called triumphantly and it pulled Lin’s attention away from her daughter back to the microphone.

“Test, test...” Miyuki started to speak through the microphone, giggling at hearing her own voice through the speakers, then giggling some more over how her laugh sounded through the speakers as well, while Lin sent her an arched eyebrow in response.

“What?” Miyuki asked innocently, still through the microphone. “This is really funny. You should try it once.”

Lin had had her fair share of speaking through microphones however, back in Republic City, and she was about to say so when an ear piercing screech coming from the microphone and the speakers sounded through the room, accompanied by a furious “MAMAAA!”.

Covering her ears and crouching down on instinct as if she could evade the sound like that, Lin looked into the room to where her daughter had called for her.

Her first thought was that Jun was calling for her help, her young ears probably much more burdened by the sound than her own.

Her eyes widened and her breath caught in her throat, therefore, when she didn’t find her daughter crouching down or covering her ears with her hands. Instead she stood up right with her arms stretched away from her with the palm of her one hand facing the speakers as the other one faced the microphone. Jun’s little face was contorted in discomfort as the sound invaded her ears, but from the tension in her daughter’s stance and the absolute fear and shock in her eyes, Lin could tell that she was completely overwhelmed.  


And as Lin’s eyes followed once more where her daughter’s hands were pointed at, the realisation hit her.

Jun was doing this, and the realisation nearly paralysed Lin. Because _how_?

This had to stop. And it had to stop now. Bracing herself for the sound that was going to invade her ears as soon as she would lift her hands, Lin jumped up and ran off the stage towards her daughter, sweeping her up in one swift moved and hugging her close to her body.

As soon as she did, the screeching stopped. 

As silence descended in the room once more, a high pitched ringing remained in Lin’s ears.

“What on earth happened there?” Miyuki’s voice sounded muffled, as did her own voice when Lin croaked out “ _Jun_. Jun happened.”

She hugged her daughter closer to her, who was now softly crying into her mother’s chest. At only three years old, the girl had no idea what just had happened and what her own potential part in it had been - nor did Lin for that matter.

“How did she do this? She wasn’t even _near_ the microphone. She can bend sound?” Miyuki asked confused and incredulously and Lin shook her head.

“No that’s not possible. You create sound through objects that catch the sound waves. You can do that with earthbending or metalbending. I would have known if she had. - No it’s like...she bent the - the microphone and speaker itself?” Lin let out a defeated sigh upon hearing how unbelievable her own words sounded.

But Miyuki slowly nodded. 

“The microphone and the speaker, hm?” And then Lin watched her eyes grow wide. “ _And_ the radio at Sora’s that broke down? And your telephone that breaks down almost once a month? And the microphone at the school? And the transmitter in Kana’s Satomobile?! Do you know what they all have in common?”

Lin shook her head in confusion, a frown of slight irritation appearing on her face as she now moved from one leg to another and back in a rocking motion, hoping it would calm her terrified daughter. “You are speaking in riddles to me, Miyuki. What do you mean?”

“Don’t you see it? These things work with signals, or waves or whatever - we will have to ask Tamao who teaches Technology. But the point is, they are based in electricity! She controlled the electric waves!”

Lin’s mouth went dry as she started to catch on to what Miyuki was saying. “That’s impossible.”

“Is metalbending impossible? Is bloodbending impossible? Is spiritbending impossible? Is lavabending impossible? Is _combustion_ bending impossible? - So why would this be? - Those waves have electricity at its core. I know that for a fact. It isn’t all that illogical, if you think about it and -“

“Yes, yes, yes.” Lin cut her friend off, in a clipped voice. “You made your point. I get it.”

“It is nothing to worry about Lin.” Miyuki now said in a softer tone of voice as she walked up to her friend and put a hand on her shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze.

Lin nodded mechanically. To her it was a whole lot to worry about if her daughter indeed turned out to be a _firebender,_ and clearly not just a regular one at that either...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually did a fair amount of research before choosing this type of bending. The reasoning behind it was: with all the types of bending we have seen, some benders take the bending to a next level. From the beginning we have known that firebenders can also bend electricity. So I figured, in a world that increasingly works on electric devices, that transmit electromagnetic waves, then that could be paired with firebending evolving as well, right? It just takes one person to be sensitive enough to pick up on it, right? Just as Toph picked up on metal bending ..


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there,  
> thanks to all of you for your very kind reviews and reassurances about the previous chapter! That really helped me and I now fully embraced the direction I took this story into. This chapter has some Lin-June, some Lin-is-a-bad-ass-teacher and some Lin-surprise in it (w.r.t. that surprise: don't worry, this won't get a too prominent place in the story, I just thought that it would be completely unrealistic not to write moments like these happening into the story :)).  
> Let me know what you think.  
> Thanks!   
> Best,  
> Metope

It felt like a déjà vu when Lin frantically knocked on the front door of Sora’s house, the reason being the same as on the day she gave birth: her child was in distress.   
  
Jun’s crying had not ceased since the incident and the girl had started to press a hand to one of her ears too.   
  
“Can you please check her ears for me? I will explain afterwards.” Lin said by ways of greeting when Sora opened the door, while she walked past her friend to her office. Miyuki following close behind.   
  
One look at her friends’ faces, white as a sheet, the shocked expression of Miyuki and the clipped tone of voice Lin was giving her, told Sora enough. Questions were for later, action was needed and so she did as she was asked.   
  
Lin tried to put Jun down on the examination table but the girl refused to let go of her mother. Her cries growing louder as she wildly started shaking her head.  
  
Sora frowned. Jun never was this clingy. “Hey Jun, what’s wrong? What has you crying so much hm?” She asked softly, but the girl refused to even acknowledge her.   
  
Locking eyes with Lin, Sora saw the tension in Lin’s jaw, the worry in her furrowed brows and the panic in her green eyes.   
  
“There was a malfunction with a microphone. The sound was ear piercingly loud and high. I still have a ringing in my ear myself.”  
  
Sora nodded in understanding. Turning to a bowl on the counter she bent the water out of it and moved to bend it over the toddler’s ears.   
  
Jun started to squirm at the feeling of the cool water around her head, but she let Sora do her work when Lin started to rub soothing circles over the girl’s back.   
  
“Alright.” Sora spoke after a while. “Her ear drums are a little irritated but there is no damage from what I can tell. She is probably just rattled from the sudden sound.”  
  
“Yeah, aren’t we all.” Miyuki mumbled and at the questioning look Sora sent her she added “Lin should tell you.”   
  
Making their way to Sora’s living room they went to sit down on the couch. Lin with Jun in her lap, whose crying had now reduced to a soft sniffing and hiccupping as she started to tire herself out.   
  
“She...uh...so – it seems that -“ Lin didn’t know where to start. She couldn’t wrap her head around the matter at all and therefore she couldn’t find the words. Didn’t _want_ to find the words either.   
  
“Jun is a firebender but she can subbend because she bent the electromagnetic waves of the microphone, and that is why she also broke your radio and Lin’s telephone and hates the park at the factory because of all the radiation of the waves. Or at least that’s what I think happened and I think I’m right.” Miyuki rambled.   
  
Lin watched Sora’s eyes go wide while she listened to Miyuki, before turning to look at Lin with an incredulous look on her face.   
  
“I know...” Lin said dryly before pressing a kiss in her now sleeping daughter’s hair.   
  
“But that is ridiculous.” Sora eventually uttered. “Are you sure?”  
  
“Well obviously I am not. It would be unprecedented if she really bent whatever wave that is not a liquid.” Lin replied, her tone snappier than she intended.   
  
“And now what?” Sora continued and Lin couldn’t help but smile a little at Sora’s wary questions. Were roles reversed, she would have reacted in the exact same way.   
  
“Now nothing.” Lin answered. “She only turned three a months ago. Even if she indeed used some form of bending, she is too young to learn anyways. I’ll just keep an extra close eye on her.”  
  
“Well yeah...” Miyuki sighed, “what else can you do?”  
  
Not much more. As it also turned out in the weeks that followed.

Jun had clearly no clue of what she possibly had done, and could not reproduce it. The incident had considerably scared her as well. She was incredibly clingy and on more than one occasion she mentioned the “loud bad scream” to Lin.   
  
Even if Jun _did_ know how to bend, she was probably too scared right now to willingly do so, Lin thought. And indeed, in the days that followed nothing out of the ordinary took place.   
  
Until one afternoon, Lin was sitting on the floor in her living room. The radio was on with soft music playing, to which Jun was showing her how well she could turn and dance in that typical toddler way of moving.   
  
“Look, mama!” She squealed again and again, turning or jumping while Lin encouraged her.   
  
The music ended however when it was time for the news.   
  
“Ahh” Jun pouted. “Mama can change it?”  
  
But Lin shook her head. “It is just the news, Jun. It will be over in just a bit and I want to hear it. After, the music comes back.”   
  
With a sigh, Jun sat down on the floor as she waited.   
  
The news that day didn’t have many interesting items, but Lin was listening attentively nonetheless. That’s why she noticed right away when the item about increased crime in Republic City - the new Chief was weak, this would never have happened under her mother’s watch - abruptly ended.

Instead there was music coming from the radio again. With a frown, Lin got up and walked to the radio to check its frequency and see if it had jumped to the other of the two channels available.

The switch was still in the same place however, but this definitely was not the channel that matched the frequency.   
  
“Mama dance!” Lin heard Jun say and she turned around to see her daughter triumphantly looking at her. “Jun…” Lin started slowly as she crouched down so that she was at the same level as her daughter, “did you just change the radio channel from over there?”

Lin watched the triumphant grin on her daughter’s face disappear, changing into a guilty expression.

“I am not angry with you, Jun.” Lin quickly said, and she tried to make her next words sound less tense, despite the anticipation she was feeling. “I am just curious. If you did, that is quite a special trick.”

“Trick?” Her daughter cocked her head to the right as she eyed Lin curiously.

“Yes,” Lin smiled. “Like the magician on the square we saw this week, remember? He could do tricks too. Juggling, and balancing…That was fun, wasn’t it?”

Jun nodded in agreement.

“Can you do tricks too, Jun? Like the magician…or…or maybe like mama does with rocks?” Lin tried again and this time she saw understanding beginning to dawn in her daughter’s eyes.

“I wanted music again.” Jun muttered. And Lin couldn’t help but gasp when her daughter by ways of explanation casually lifted one hand, directing it to the radio and Lin heard the frequency of the radio jump back to the previous channel again as Jun spread the fingers of her hand.

A chuckle escaped Lin’s lips. “That is a wonderful trick, little Pebble.”

At the compliment Jun sent her a toothy grin before running towards her mother and Lin caught her daughter as the girl wrapped her short arms around Lin’s neck.

“I have a secret.” Jun then whispered in Lin’s ear and Lin swallowed before choosing her next words carefully as to not scare Jun.

“You do? Will you share it with me?”

Jun nodded as she pulled back a little so that she could look at her mother. “I can do two tricks. Look.”

Carefully Jun placed the palms of her hands against one another in front of her, before slowly moving her hands away from each other, palms still facing inward.

Lin nearly forgot to breathe as she saw a thin current of blue electricity crackle between her daughter’s hands. Bending radio’s was one thing, but at least that seemed to be relatively harmless. A toddler who was already able to create electricity was another thing. Lin didn’t like it, if she was being honest. Electricity was dangerous and Jun was too young still to realize that.

“That is…quite the trick, Jun.” Lin breathed and Jun laughed as she closed her hands, making the electricity disappear. “Two tricks, mama. Can I be a magician now?”

Lin chuckled as she pressed a kiss to her daughter’s cheek. Worrying could be done later, right now she wanted to make sure that she showed her daughter how proud she was – like her own mother had never shown at all. Not even when she could already bend metal at seven years old.

“Of course you can, Jun. I am very proud of your tricks – but be careful too, alright?”

The toddler nodded and smiled – but how much of it she actually understood, Lin wasn’t too sure of.

In the next days, the worry didn’t quite let her go either, and at work, her earthbending kids noticed.

“Miss Lin are you okay?” Mika asked carefully as they stood on the earthbending training field in the courtyard of the school.

“What do you mean, Mika?” Lin asked a little confused as she was in the middle of a demonstration.

“Uhm well, it is just –I thought…” Mika started hesitantly.

“The previous rock of your demonstration landed one whole meter next to its target, that’s what Mika means.” Timu, the twelve year old, came to the rescue.

Looking over her shoulder, Lin now saw that one of the rocks was indeed nowhere near its target. She really was off her game today. However, that did not mean that the rules in her class could be brushed aside either and she knew that with Timu, she needed to be consequent about that.

Lin narrowed her eyes. “That’s what Mika means…” she let her words linger with one eyebrow raised expectantly.

Timu sighed. “That’s what Mika means, _Miss Lin_.”

Lin nodded in approval, before relaxing her stance a little. These kids deserved an explanation. They were not wrong after all. “You kids are perceptive - but that is what I taught you to be, so it is my own doing, I guess.”

She saw the four of them grin a little in pride before she continued. “I didn’t sleep so well tonight, that’s all. Which goes to show how important it is to find your balance, both physically and mentally, when bending. Now, we came to this class to bend, so let’s continue.”

She was grateful when the kids didn’t press the matter any further but obediently moved to stand in their practicing positions.

Later that day she had a meeting with one of the older kids that she was counselling.

“Good afternoon, Kari. What an honor that you did choose to grace _me_ with your presence today.” Lin drawled as she leaned back in her chair, arms crossed and an unimpressed expression on her face as the fourteen year old girl shuffled into her office.

“Starting with sarcasm right away, are we?” The girl countered as she let herself fall down on the chair in front of Lin’s desk.

“Well, I figured we could skip the part where I genuinely ask you how your day has been and you tell me it was fine, and I point out that you have skipped all of your classes again so far today, and you just shrug.”

A small chuckle left Kari. _Good_ , Lin thought, that meant the girl was in an constructive mood today.

“You want to tell me what made you decide that it was a good idea to skip all those firebending classes?”

The smile on Kari’s lips disappeared as she stared at an imaginary point on Lin’s desk. “What’s the use anyways.”

Lin frowned. “Of firebending lessons? I would say you are clever enough to figure that out yourself.”

Kari sighed at that. Lin could see she was struggling and hesitating between opening up to Lin and keeping her mouth shut.

“You can tell me anything, Kari. I am here to listen to you and help you.” Lin spoke softly and it seemed to do the trick.

“My parents –“ Kari started, “they are non-benders. Both of them, as is nearly every one of my family except for one estranged uncle. And they uhm, they don’t want me to bend anymore.”

“What? Why?!” Her reaction was impulsive, but Lin wasn’t known for her patience or lack of temperament. It might have scared or discouraged some students, but for Kari it was the proof of empathy and the hint that Lin would understand her problem that she needed to continue her story.

“I know right?” The girl spoke indignantly as she looked up to catch Lin’s gaze. “They don’t want me to bend anymore, because they think it is dangerous. It is so stupid. They don’t understand that it is much more dangerous not to let me learn. Firebending will always be there. I will always use it, but with less teaching, there are more risks. They just…they just don’t get it.”

“Have you tried telling them this?” Lin asked and Kari nodded.

“I did, but it is like they don’t want to listen. They are so afraid that I might get hurt, or that I hurt someone else. But firebending is a part of me, something that never goes away. And I just feel like…when they reject my firebending…then they also reject me? Does that make sense?”

Lin nodded slowly. Kari’s words were striking a nerve within her. Not just because she knew _exactly_ how Kari felt right now – had felt it far too often when Toph didn’t even _try_ to listen to her – but also because in that moment she realized she was about to make the same mistake with Jun.

All day she had been going back and forth about what to do with the knowledge she had of Jun’s bending. She was so worried that Jun would accidentally hurt herself or someone else with her electricity bending – not to mention the bending of radio waves, of which Lin couldn’t even properly reason what all the possible dangers could be.

In the end she had decided that she would just have to ask Jun not to perform her ‘tricks’ anymore until she could go to a preschool where she would learn ‘normal’ firebending techniques, and would hopefully for the time being forget about her other skills.

But now, listening to Kari, she realized that she would then be asking her daughter to be someone she is not. As a toddler or preschooler, Jun probably wouldn’t notice it so much. But the fact remained that Lin would be rejecting this part of her daughter, would be trying to mold it to her own image of what was best, but also of what was safe and _easiest_ for her daughter. And that just wasn’t right. The conflicted brown eyes of the fourteen year old in front of her, with frustration and sadness written on her face, was proof of that.

“Do you want me to talk to your parents about this?” Lin calmly asked, focusing her attention on her student again.

Kari hesitated. “You are a bender too, they won’t listen.”

Lin scoffed. “If they choose not to listen to anyone who bends the elements they have to ignore half the population of this earth. That doesn’t seem like a very maintainable way of living.”

Kari shrugged. “I don’t know. – Talk to them if you like, I just don’t think it will make a difference.”

It pained Lin to see the young girl in front of her so defeated.

The image didn’t let her go, and when she took the telephone later that afternoon to make the call to Kari’s parents, it fueled her resolve to make these people see reason.

Kari’s father answered the phone. The conversation was a short one. After the usual pleasantries Lin asked them to indulge her in answering some of her curious questions.

“Your son is taking sword fighting lessons, is he not?”

“Yes, yes he is.” Kari’s father confirmed, pride audible in his voice.

“Why?”

“Why? Well, because we want him to develop the skill, he has talent for wielding the sword.” Again such pride, if only he would talk the same about Kari’s bending, Lin thought somewhat bitterly.

“If he is so talented, can’t he just fight with a sword without training?” Lin countered.

“Uh- well – no, that would be dangerous. He wouldn’t know how to properly use it. That would be irresponsible.”

“Do you consider yourself to be a responsible man?” Lin grinned as she heard the man on the other side starting to stutter in confusion before he answered with a hesitant yes.

“So let me put this straight. You let your son take sword fighting lessons because you are a responsible man, and you want your son to learn how to properly wield a sword, so that he not accidentally hurt himself or others. Is that correct?”

“Yes, if you put it like that, I guess you are right – but forgive me if I ask what this has to do with my daughter?” The man was slowly losing his patience with the conversation, Lin noticed. That was fine though. Lin had the man right where she wanted him to be.

“Well, if all of that is true. Then please explain to me why you do not feel the need to extend that same responsibility, care and trust to your daughter. Isn’t firebending much like learning to wield a sword?”

A long silence followed.

“I don’t think I understand what you mean, Miss Lin.”

“Kari has been skipping her classes today. Upon confronting her with this, she explained to me that you want her to stop taking firebending classes, because you want her to stop firebending all together since you think it is dangerous.” Her voice had become sharp by now.

“Well, we –“

Lin didn’t leave the man time to respond. “And by wanting her to stop firebending, you are wanting her to stop being who she truly is. Firebending is part of who she is. Kari told me she feels like you are rejecting her, by rejecting her firebending. I understand it can be intimidating sometimes to someone who isn’t a firebending to see their child wielding such power. I am going through much of the same thing with my own daughter currently - ” She hadn’t meant to drag Jun into this – hadn’t even decided yet if she was ready to share this bit of information with the world. But the words had just slipped past her lips as she tried to not just verbally attack the man, but also show some understanding for his point of view.

“But intimidation or worry are no reason to prevent your daughter from learning. If anything, it is _more_ dangerous not to let her learn. Just like it would be more dangerous not to let your son learn how to wield a sword. So for Kari’s sake, I want to ask you to please reconsider your decision.”

It remained quiet on the other side of the line for a while before Kari’s father spoke again. “Kari said that? That she feels like we rejected her?”

“Yes, I am sorry.” Lin answered in a softer voice. “She is quite upset about it, and understandably so. I am only bringing this up because she didn’t have the impression you were willing to listen to her. So I offered to help.”

Again silence. “Thank you, Miss Lin.”

“I trust you will take the right decision.” Lin concluded the conversation before hanging up. She let out a deep sigh, hopefully she hadn’t made the situation worse by calling.

“You can take a page out of your own book though, Beifong.” She murmured to herself before getting up from her chair, turning her words into deeds.

Tadao was the school’s physics and technology teacher, and also a firebender. He was a young man in his late thirties. He looked up and smiled politely when Lin knocked on the open door of his class room to let him know she was there.

“Lin, how are you? What can I do for you?”

“Fine. I came to you for a…personal matter of sorts.”

Upon hearing the seriousness in her voice, Tadao stopped with what he was doing and rounded his desk to sit down on one of the chairs, gesturing for Lin to do the same.

Once they sat down, Lin told him what had happened in the auditorium of the town hall weeks ago and how she saw Jun bend the radio frequency and create electricity.

“I know this sounds quite unlikely, seeing as we are talking about a three year old. But I think that she can do these things precisely because she is so young still. Her mind hasn’t been molded into thinking in just the four traditional types of bending yet – and with there being so much more electricity around us these days as apposed to fire, it could make sense that she picked up on the electricity sooner than on bending fire.” Lin tried to defend her story as she saw the frown on Tadao’s face. “And that is why I think she needs a teacher, even though she is still so young. So –“

She stopped speaking when Tadao lifted a hand by ways of indicating to do so.

“Lin…I believe you. You are not the type of person to read too much into things, quite the opposite I would say. So if you think your daughter might be a… _creative_ firebender, then of course I will help you.”

Lin smiled a grateful smile at that. “Thank you Tadao.”

“But,” Tadao continued, “I do have one favor to ask in return.”

“Sure.” Lin nodded.

“Will you go out for dinner with me?”

Lin’s eyes widened at the question. Not in a million years had she expected this to be the favor Tadao would ask for. A million things started to race through her mind, and her surprise must be visible on her face as Tadao chuckled.

“Don’t feel obliged to say yes, Lin. You can of course say no, and I will still help you and your daughter. And you won’t have to answer right away. Think of it less as a favor, actually, and more of me asking you out.” The man winked before grabbing his bag and exiting the class room. Leaving a completely perplexed Lin behind.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, we are approaching the part where I am going to start the storyline of bringing Lin back into contact with the gang at Republic City...but first our home girl needed to go through some more personal growth, which was the main purpose of this chapter. And some more developments with Jun.
> 
> I think I will need one more chapter to set the stage and then the next chapter will start connecting this storyline with that of Tenzin and the others again.
> 
> On another note, I think I am letting go of Lin actually trying to look for her father or anything of the sort. If she did go looking for him it would mainly be as part of her own journey in finding herself (such cliche words, but oh well) or for Jun's sake. But there are other ways of finding the information she is looking for in that case. And it is just completely unrealistic for her to find the man based on just a first name, especially in the age they are living in.. If anyone sees this differently or has any other thoughts on this, I would love to read it though.
> 
> As usualy, thank you so much to all of your kind comments on the previous chapter, and let me know what you think of this chapter as well :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

_‘What do you have to lose?’, ‘How bad can it be?’, ‘If not for fun, then do it in the name of science’, ‘Just go, or is there someone else you are still waiting for?’_ – That last question had come from Sora when Lin had told both her and Miyuki that Tadao had asked her out.

She had felt like a teenager bringing it up, all flustered and a little embarrassed. It was just that she wasn’t used to someone asking her out like that. She had never been anything like the other girls in school, or at the police academy. And besides, she was a Beifong, which was intimidating enough in itself for the majority of her peers to stay away from her.

Sora’s question, whether she was still waiting for someone else, had triggered Lin. Because, the answer was _yes_. Part of her was still waiting for Tenzin. Although she would never tell that to Sora and Miyuki. They would only pity her, and she didn’t need that.

So in the end she had agreed to having dinner with Tadao more so to prove a point to her friends than because she wanted to. But to her big surprise, she had quite an enjoyable evening.

Tadao was only a year younger than she was. He had been working at the school for a couple of years now. His black hair was shaved at the sides and longer on top. Soft amber eyes shone from under dark well shaped eyebrows and Lin liked the hint of mischief she found shining in his eyes every now and then. That, and the fact that he was very much able to have a serious conversation as well, made that she didn’t absolutely hate it to be in his company.

Up until now, they had talked about this and that during dinner. While Lin told him how she had ended up in Fire Fountain City, she paid attention to her made-up story being consistent, while attentively listening to Tadao’s stories as well. He told her that he had been married before, but he and his wife had separated, she lived in another city now. That was also when he had started working at the school, originally coming from a small village somewhere in the Fire Nation.

“I take it Jun’s father is from the Fire Nation as well?”

Lin wasn’t prepared for the question and her mind momentarily blanked when she tried to find an answer.

“I am sorry, I didn’t mean to pry..” Tadao started, taking her silence as an answer in itself.

It caused Lin to break free from her momentary paralysis and she quickly shook her head. “No, no, you are not prying. It is a perfectly logical question, especially since you have been teaching Jun. – But, no. Jun’s father was just a childhood friend from the place where I grew up. The firebending genes she has from me, I think…”

At Tadao’s surprised face Lin continued. “My father…he supposedly was, or _is_ , from the Fire Nation. My mother never told me anything about him. Just that he is from the Fire Nation and that his first name is Kanto. – It’s stupid, but upon coming here, I hoped I would be able to find him. But that was before I knew how common a name Kanto is in the Fire Nation.”

Tadao chuckled at that. “Yes, I suppose there are at least two guys with that name in every street of this city alone.” Then his face grew serious again. “That must be frustrating though, it will be nearly impossible to find him without any more information about him.”

Lin nodded and averted her eyes, suddenly unable to deal with the amount of understanding and genuine interest Tadao showed her. She then shrugged. “It is alright. I felt an immense need to find him while I was pregnant with Jun. But now that she is here, and that I have found a new life here, the need has become less. Although, I do wonder occasionally if he might also have been able to bend radio waves like she can.”

Tadao nodded thoughtfully. “It truly is quite remarkable what she can do. I think you made the right decision to teach her this young already. The bending energy she has access to already is a gift, but it can also be a danger.”

“And then you go and teach her how to conjure fire in her first lesson.” Lin remarked dryly, thinking back to how her daughter had triumphantly showed her a small burning flame in the palm of her hand the other day.

Tadao gave her an apologetic grin. “She needs to learn the basics of firebending before she will be able to understand what she is doing when she bends electricity. And then, once we get there and she gets older, we can look into this unique talent of hers. The possibilities are endless, you know? If she can truly bend radio waves…I wonder if she can internalize the waves, let them resonate within her and thus intercept messages. Or distort messages from others. How amazing would that be!?”

Lin narrowed her eyes a little at that, pointing one of her chopsticks at him. “My daughter will not be your elephant rat to test on, you hear me?”

“No, no no, of course not! In no way did I mean to create that impression – that’s not – not at all –“ His stammering and the speed with what Tadao’s eyes had widened at her words, waving his hands in front of him to emphasize his words, made a grin grow on Lin’s lips. It was good to know that she still had it.

“Relax,” She smirked. “I am just teasing.”

The rest of the evening continued in pleasant conversation and Lin hadn’t noticed how much time had passed until they were on their way home again while the moon lit empty streets, ready for the night.

“Well, I go right here, and you have to go left.” Lin stated matter-of-factly at the crossroads near to their houses, and she cringed inwardly at how ridiculous she sounded – she really was behaving like a teenager. But in her defense, so was Tadao as she observed how he was nervously clenching and unclenching his hands into fists, stammering that she was correct and that they would indeed part ways here.

“I-I could walk you to your door, you know, for safety and all?”

Lin snorted. “Please, I am an earthbender, I can defend myself. – But thank you for the offer, that was considerate of you.” She added in a softer tone of voice.

Tadao smiled softly. “Well, Lin. I hope you don’t regret having agreed to this dinner with me. I for one had a very nice evening.”

Lin found it didn’t cost her any effort to return the smile as she nodded. “I had a nice evening as well.”

They kept staring at each other for just another moment in comfortable silence. “Alright, well, I am going then. I have to be up early tomorrow to pick Jun up from Miyuki’s.” Lin said.

Tadao nodded. “Of course. Well, good night then!”

Lin smiled and with a wave and a nod she turned around and started to walk away.

“Hey, Lin?” While turning around with a questioning look, she saw Tadao jogging her way again.

“Yes? –“ She started, but her next words were muffled as Tadao reached her and, placing his hands on either side of face, softly but firmly pressed his lips to hers.

A gasp escaped Lin at the contact. For a moment she froze, but then she felt his thumb softly brush her cheek, and with it she allowed herself to relax into the kiss for a moment.

Just as sudden as it happened, Tadao let go again a wide smile on his face as he started to walk backwards. “ _Now_ we can go home.” He grinned. “See you tomorrow, Lin!” And with that he turned around and Lin watched him jog away into the night.

That night it took her a long time to find sleep. It had been so long since she had kissed anybody, she had almost forgotten how it felt. And it had been even longer since she had kissed anyone other than Tenzin. The five years after their separation, she had completely focused on work, refusing to even so much as go out with the occasionally fool who dared to ask.

“Come on, Lin, get yourself together.” She breathed to herself, but the truth was that she was scared out of her mind. Suddenly she was confronted with the fact that there was the possibility of liking someone else than Tenzin. That she could enjoy a kiss given to her by someone else than the stoic airbender.

The following day she decided that, petty as it was, she would try to avoid Tadao as much as possible at work. That didn’t turn out to be that hard, as Tadao seemed to be doing the same to her. That, to her own frustration, annoyed her a little actually. Who did this man think he was? Asking her out, kissing her then ignoring her. Didn’t he know who she was? – Well no, he didn’t, not really. That was the whole point of being here.

Lin groaned at her own irrationality as she was reading through some paperwork for an upcoming school meeting.

“Well, if whatever it is you are reading elicits such a reaction from you, I suggest you put it aside.”

Looking up she saw Tadao standing in the door opening of her office, signature smirk on his face.

“What do you want?” She grumbled.

“Nothing.” He lifted his hands in mock defense. “Just thought I would stop by and say once more that I really enjoyed yesterday evening, after having given you some space all day.

Lin frowned. “I am not some delicate flower that you need to psycho-analyze, you know?”

There it was again, that soft understanding smile of his. “I know, but I also know this is the first time you dated since your previous relationship. And I just happen to know that, whether you want it or not, that can be a little overwhelming sometimes. And I really like you Lin. Like, _really_ like you. I know that is early to say after just one date, but I am rarely wrong about these things. So I don’t want to mess this up by rushing, but I don’t want to wait too long and lose the momentum either.”

Narrowing her eyes at him. “I am rarely wrong about these things, said the divorced man.” She drawled, then immediately apologizing thereafter. “I am sorry, that was unkind.”

But Tadao shook his head with a chuckle. “No worries, I can take a little sarcasm.”

Lin sighed. This man was an enigma to her. His approach was so different from anything she was used to that it left her completely defenseless, and to her great surprise the urge to stay was bigger than the urge to bolt – which, to be honest, was her default option in these kind of situations.

“What on earth do you see in me?” She therefore uttered – if she couldn’t control the situation, then at least she could try to understand it. “I am a woman nearing her forties, I have a daughter. I am cranky, I like being alone and –“

“- and you have a good sense of humor, a knack for dealing with children, especially the misunderstood ones, you have clearly seen the world, _lived_ the world, you are intelligent, you are not easily scared, are up for a challenge, _and_ you are incredibly good looking.” Tadao finished her words and Lin felt her cheeks redden – which annoyed her, which caused her cheeks to burn up even more, which – spirits, could her mind just quit with the teenager antics already?

“You are not going to push me away, Lin. Just think about that.” Tadao smiled before leaving her doorway again.

Lin _did_ think about that. And in the months that followed she thought back to that moment every time they took a new step in what could now only be described as their relationship. And with every new step Lin warned him. The first time she did it, had been after he had told her he was in love with her, three months after that first date. She should have seen it coming, but his confession still shocked her to the core. She reacted poorly, withdrew her hand which he had been holding as they had walked through the park. And she had ran.

The following day she had sought him out. He was understanding and patient, but she saw a slight hint of hurt in his eyes. Hurt that she had put there, despite not having meant to do so. But she couldn’t change the facts. It had been a stammered, incoherent sort of rambling – far from her usual, preferred one word sentences, when she had explained those facts to him. She had explained to Tadao that, despite enjoying her time with him, she wasn’t sure if she was in love with him, nor if she ever could be. A part of her would always love Jun’s father. What she felt for Tadao was just not the same.

And Tadao said that that was okay, that no love was the same, that he understood that. And Lin would nod, all the while wondering if he really did understand. Because to her, the way she had felt with Tenzin and the way she felt with Tadao, they weren’t just two different but equal kinds of love. No, her love for Tenzin was transcending all of her thoughts, all of her worries and self-doubt. So much so, that she had essentially left her entire life behind for him. Whereas with Tadao she felt seen, and understood and cared for. But love? She just wasn’t sure if that was part of the equation, nor if it ever would be.

But it was nice to have someone other than a toddler to talk to in the evenings, and it was nice to have someone to share things with. And it was nice not to have someone sleeping next to her again, and also nice to have someone to sleep _with_ again, if she was being honest. Besides, her friends liked Tadao. And more importantly, Jun liked Tadao, and it was good for her to also have some male figures around her, wasn’t it? Thus, Lin pushed her doubts to the back of her mind, and went along with this new opportunity at sharing her life with someone that the universe presented her. And though she continued to make sure that she maintained her space, and continued to warn Tadao every once in a while, they developed somewhat of a routine where she and Jun would sometimes spend a weekend, or a week or two at Tadao’s home, and sometimes Tadao would stay at their place. And their colleagues and neighborhood had of course gossiped about it initially; a man and a women practically living together but not marrying. But it helped that they both had had previous relationships, and soon everyone moved on and accepted this hybrid form of living as just another part of reality.

But then Jun, now four and half years old, went to school. And she played outside with the other kids during recess. And usually Lin would be having lunch with the other teachers elsewhere, but this time she was looking through the window at the kids playing. A soft smile was on her lips as she watched how her daughter was running and laughing, fitting in so well with the other kids, like Lin herself never had – parents had already told their kids who Lin Beifong was exactly, there never had been a fair chance.

And then Jun wasn’t running anymore. Instead she stood still, her little body slumped and bent forward a little, hands raising to press to her chest as her shoulders heaved with every breath. And Lin was outside in an instant, asking Jun what was wrong. But her daughter was gasping for air, her breathing accompanied by a wheezing sound. And Lin called for the school healer, who took one look at Jun and – thank the spirits - immediately knew what was wrong.

Pushing Lin to the side, the healer started bending water around Jun’s throat and chest. Lin had seldomly felled as helpless as she did in that moment. She noticed Tadao, who had also gone outside at the commotion, place a hand on her shoulder in comfort, but she barely felt it.

Lin watched intently as the healer kept bending the water, until the Jun’s breathing lowered and Lin saw how she was able to take proper breaths again. As soon as the healer finished, the girl rushed towards Lin, tears in her eyes. Lin scooped her up in an instant as she comforted her baby, rubbing circles over her back and whispering soothing words into her ear.

Once Jun had calmed down again, and as Lin and the healer made their way inside – followed by Tadao and Miyuki who had also joined –, Lin asked the healer what had happened. The healer explained that Jun seemed to suffer of a condition called ‘asthma’. It meant that under certain circumstances, her body had trouble keeping her breathing under control. It was not uncommon under children, especially not those who were born prematurely. It was only recently discovered that the muscles of the lungs in those instances would tense so much, that they would trap air into the lungs and didn’t allow for new air to come in. Massaging the muscles through bending so that they would let go of their tension was an effective way to solve this problem, but of course no long term solution.

Handing Lin a small device, the healer pointed out that Jun needed to carry this device with her wherever she went. If the situation would occur again, the device functioned as an inhaler diffusing medicine to her lungs that would help the muscles to relax, allowing air to flow freely again.

In her fear and worry, Lin couldn’t help but snort. “Typical, my daughter has a disease related to air whereas her father is…” Miyuki coughed loudly at her words and Lin, realizing what she was about to say, was able to stop herself just in time.

Tadao picked up on the interaction however and asked Lin what she meant to say.

And it was in that moment that Lin knew that she could not continue whatever it was that she had allowed to go on with Tadao if she was not going to share with him who she really was. The question was, however, did she want to do that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did my research on asthma, and although taking a slightly free interpretation here and there, inhalers already existed since the 17th century. Then in the 19th century they discovered asthma is an issue of overly enthusiastic muscles, basically - and since LoK is technology-wise somewhere between the 17th and 19th century in the real world (because let's be honest, some elements are SUPER developed and then others are not at all), I think I'm fine when it comes to painting a realistic image here. The medicine they subsequently used in those inhalers was less than ideal, so let's just not specify what exactly is in Jun's inhaler so that we can just imagine that it isn't ARSENIC like they did in the 1800's, 'mkay?


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow thank to all who commented on the previous chapter! Reading every comment made me smile without fail :)! 
> 
> So halfway into writing this chapter I somewhat decided to change parts of the storyline, which in fact means that the timeline sped up a little more in this chapter than anticipated. So we have some Izumi-scenes in this chapter already :)! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter and also like what direction I took with Lin’s career. (also don’t hate me about the Tadao thing. More notes about that at the end of the chapter). Am curious to read what you think will happen next :)! 
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

She had kept her secret for six more months. All her free time had been focused on Jun in that period. There were a couple more occasions where her daughter had an asthma attack before the two of them figured out the right balance between exercising and excitement, and being careful at the same time.  


Only when Lin found that she did not have to worry so much about Jun anymore, did she fully turn her attention back to Tadao and told him about her past.

Similar to what she told Sora and Miyuki, she left out the part where she specified who Jun’s father was. She and Tenzin has been broken up for years already before she got to Fire Fountain City so it was safe enough to assume neither would connect the dots.

Telling him had been a game changer. 

A game changer for her, because she discovered that her desire to stay hidden from her family at all costs was slowly disappearing. Replaced by a certain kind of indifference and a stronger desire to be able to live the life she wanted, wherever that would take her. If that meant her family would find her, then so be it. Everything was so different now. _She_ was so different now. Surely that would mean at least some dynamics would be different as well, right? Well, exceptfor her mother, who was incapable of change. And except for her own feelings towards Tenzin. But he would have completely moved on by now, so that shouldn’t pose as big a problem for her anymore as it once did. 

A game changer for him, because he realised that things were a little more complicated than he had hoped. That was one legendary family that Lin descended from. And although Lin may not realise it yet, or might not want to, she would have to reconnect with them again at some point.

But Tadao embraced it, this new part of her. And they carried on. And they still might have, if only he had remembered one of his actions of months before..

..

“Your Heighness, are you alright? Did something happen? Should we call for the healer?” 

Slowly Izumi shook her head, eyes never leaving the piece of paper in front of her. 

“I am alright. But please call for my father.” Her voice barely more than a whisper. She didn’t hear her assistant running away from her, already sunken in her thoughts as she again stared at the letter. 

Izumi only looked up when she heard her father greet her and ask what was wrong as her assistant, standing behind her father with worried eyes, had sounded quite alarming. 

“Thank you, Shoh.” She thanked him. “I would like to speak to my father in private now.” 

Shoh nodded and bowed before disappearing to the hallway, closing the door behind him.

“I am going over recommendations sent in by all the city councils for a new ambassador on behalf of the Fire Nation to Republic City. Tell me of whom this reminds you when you read this.” Izumi said standing up and handing her father the letter. 

She watched his eyes scanning the letter and only because she knew her father so well, could she tell that he caught on to what she had meant. 

He wore the war and subsequent years as Fire Lord visibly on his face in every wrinkle. But Zuko never lost his natural charisma and authority. His expression always holding the midst between neutrality and contemplative. It made it difficult for those who did not know him to read his thoughts - the perfect traits for a diplomat.But Izumi saw the features in her father’s face harden ever so lightly as he realised what it would mean if their suspicions were correct. 

Slowly lowering the letter Zuko looked at his daughter. “Say you are right, what would you do?”

Izumi sighed. “Well, as Fire Lord, the capacity in which I am reading this letter, I could not or at least should not act upon it from the mere motive of her possibly being my long lost friend.” 

Zuko nodded in approval.

“But,” Izumi continued, “the other recommendation letters are all about candidates completely unsuited for the job. With the Agni Kai triads on the rise and with a number of members of the Red Lotus still out there and active again both here, in the Earth Kingdom and in Republic City, I need an ambassador in Republic City that speaks the language of the city, understands how different that city is compared to the older cities of the five nations, but can also make the connections between the nations. While also having roots in the Fire Nation and understanding its past and current challenges and strengths. I need someone who isn’t easily scared, who can stand their ground, but who is also wells versed in the world of etiquette and diplomacy. And none of those candidates have both these qualities. But from what I read in this letter, she does. I know her personality, I know her strengths and weaknesses. But she has clearly also changed as a person over time as well, as we all have. From what I read in this letter, she has become very socially involved in both the socio-economic wellbeing as the politics of her community in the Fire Nation. She would make the perfect candidate and more importantly, if it is truly her, then I know I can trust her and - what?” Izumi halted as she saw her father raise his eyebrows in surprise. 

“You trust her? After her sudden departure?” 

Izumi nodded without so much as a moment’s thought. “Yes I do. She must have had her reasons for having left the way she did. And while I can only guess, some of those reasons are the circumstances we all created for her - for each other. 

Always leaving the negative or the difficult unsaid. Brushing it aside as if it didn’t exist, smiling and laughing over it. Whereas Lin, Lin is not like that. Lin is genuine. And we didn’t appreciate that about her. We classified it as grumpy and brusque. Whereas I know there was much more to Lin. And she wasn’t as tough as she made everyone believe she was. She was not her mother.

Her leaving made me see all of that. And it has changed all of us for the better. We talk more, about real things, real life. Instead of pleasantries. Lin did all of that and she had to leave before we even realised. So, _yes_. I trust her.” Izumi hadn’t meant to go on like she just had, but she had in fact thought a lot about Lin and her disappearance, and it felt good to share her thoughts about it.

Zuko nodded in understanding. “Alright. Then I think you should summon this woman for an audience, see who she is. _If_ she is willing to come. Because let’s not forget that she is not the one who wrote that letter and by the phrasing of it I doubt she knows that it has been sent. And do not inform the others yet.” Zuko warned.

..

Lin had not been this angry since she had arrived to Fired Fountain City. The walls of the school trembled dangerously as she was struggling to keep her bending under control as she marched to Tadao’s classroom.

Slamming the door open she almost caused it to break out of his hinges.

In two large strides she was standing in front of his desk, slamming the letter she had just received down on the table.

“What. On. Earth. Did you DO!?” She growled lowly and Tadao, who up until then seemed to have been frozen in his seat as she had barged in, now visibly winced at her display of anger.

Stealing a fleeting glance at the letter, Tadao registered the logo of the government’s official letters and realised what the letter was about.

“I sent it before you told me.” He muttered apologetically and Lin felt a little bit of anger deflate at the genuine tone of his voice.

“And you didn’t think to tell me?” She growled still.

“I forgot.” Tadao answered, burying his face in his hands as he let his elbows lean on his desk. “I am so sorry, Linny.”

“ _Don’t_ call me that.”

“Please let me explain. At the time, when the Head Master mentioned that the Council was asked to put forward a candidate, I immediately thought of you. You are meant to do more than teach and council students, and this could be it. Then we didn’t hear anything anymore and I had already given up on it by the time you told me about your past.”

“And no one ever thought to mention any of this to me?” Lin asked again. “Even without my past being as it is, it is a pretty bold move to apply on someone else’s behalf for a job as Ambassador of the Fire Nation without that person knowing, don’t you think?”

He nodded. “I know. I just thought that -“

“That I would refuse if you told me? Well yes, clearly I would and with good reason!” Lin roared, her anger flaring again.

“I am sorry.” He offered again. “I can take it up with the Council if you want and -“

“No you have done enough.” She growled. “And stop apologising, it makes you look stupid.” And with that she turned around to leave for her own office, but not before she metalbent a dent in the metal storage cabinet in her right to release some of her anger- no need to keep up the illusion that she couldn’t do that with him anymore.

She had no idea how long she sat in her office, angrily staring at the letter in front of her, when Miyuki entered her office.

“Did I say you could come in?” Lin asked, sending her a death glare. But Miyuki just answered with a small smile as she went to sit opposite of Lin.

“Tadao just told me what had happened. He shouldn’t have done that behind your back. With or without knowing who you were. But what happened to not feeling the need to hide from your family anymore?”

“Please, if you are trying to have a conversation about whether I am actually considering this, then you are sorely mistaken.”

“Because? Please, indulge me.”

Lin sighed. “Because once Izum- I mean, the _Fire Lord_ realises who I am, she will withdraw the offer. Because I would have to move back to the city I escaped. Because it would be impossible to keep my distance from my family especially since half of them are involved in the everyday politics.Because Jun is still so young and doesn’t even properly know about any of this yet. And I would be uprooting her whole live by moving, placing her in the public eye again. And she can handle her own, but her health is fragile and I have to look out for her. And I haven’t been completely honest with any of you either, because Jun’s father is Councilman Tenzin; who, for your information, has been married for _longer_ than the six years of Jun’s existence, if you know what I mean. And I cannot and _will_ not bring her into a situation where press will have a field day painting me and her by default as illegitimate and potentially wrecking a home. So no, I cannot go!”

Her hands were trembling by the time she finished speaking and an angry crack had appeared behind her in the wall. She had said more than she had meant toas well.

Miyuki stared at her with wide eyes and behind Miyuki, to Lin’s surprise, was Tadao standing.

Her anger disappeared as soon as she saw the hurt and confused look on his face. This was not how she had meant to share that particular part of her story with him.

“I came to apologise, but now uhm-“ he stammered, “Is that really true? The son of Avatar Aang is Jun’s father?”

She gave a single nod.

“I - I mean. I knew you two had a history. But I never thought - that had ended years ago already, he- he married again. I never expected that he - and even after all this time..I am _still_ competing with _him_? A married man, the son of an Avatar, whom you haven’t truly been in a relationship with for over ten years now?”

“I’ll...leave you two alone so you can talk.” Miyuki started cautiously.

But Tadao shook his head. “No need. I’ll go, I need to think.” Then he looked over to Lin again. “Can you please stop by my house this afternoon? We can talk then.” And without waiting her response he turned around and left.

Lin internally wanted to punch a hole in the wall, break down her office, scream in frustration. But the truth was, she just didn’t have the energy for it. So instead she tiredly closed her eyes as she slumped in her chair. “I messed up.” She sighed.

It took a while for Miyuki to say something, to the extent that Lin wasn’t sure if she was even still there, but didn’t dare opening her eyes to look either.

“Sora had her suspicions.” Miyuki then said. “But I always thought you would have shared information like that if it were true. I mean, we have known each other for years and have gone through some pretty tough times as well. Why didn’t you?”

Lin grimaced, she tried to find the words to explain to Miyuki why she hadn’t. But even now, six years later, she couldn’t find them.

Opening her eyes again and standing up from her seat, rounding her desk, she hoped to find the resolve again to hide behind a stoic expression and steady voice.

But when she saw the flicker of disappointment in Miyuki’s eyes, Lin felt herself crumble inwardly. Setting her jaw and lifting her chin a little to keep her composure, her next words were barely more than a whisper as her pride battled with her emotional exhaustion.

“Because, as pathetic as it is, I don’t seem to be able to stop loving him, no matter what I try. And it _still_ hurts like it was yesterday.”

Looking away, she frowned and blinked furiously when a few tears still managed to make their way down her cheeks, and she brushed them away quickly. Letting out an apologetic chuckle and a shrug in the proces, she shifted her weight from one leg to the other and back at the discomfort she felt of being so openly vulnerable.

“Oh Lin,” Miyuki said softly, “I know you don’t do hugs. But I am still going to give you one, because you need one and it is long overdue.”

Lin didn’t even have the strength anymore to overthink, so when Miyuki wrapped her arms around her, she allowed herself to melt into the hug gratefully.

“You know,” Miyuki continued, when she let go again, “with everything that happened over the past few months, and despite what you just told me, you just only listed reasons related to _others_ why you shouldn’t consider the position. Right now, you first need to go to Tadao and then get a good night’s rest. But I suggest you think about all of this again when you are feeling a little less overwhelmed and exhausted.”

Lin shook her head in exhaustion. “No, Jun -“

“I’ll pick Jun up.” Miyuki said decidedly. “Now, try to freshen up a little, gather your thoughts and go to Tadao.”

Lin nodded slowly. Turning she closed her hand into a fist, closing the crack in the wall that she had caused earlier before gathering her things and heading out the school.

“Mama! Where are you going?” She heard when she was halfway through the court yard. Turning to her right she saw Jun running towards her, who had been playing outside with her class.

“Hey there little Pebble.” Lin smiled, earning her a frown from her daughter.

“I am not a little Pebble anymore.” The girl huffed, hands on her hips.

“You’ll always be my little Pebble. Even if you are as old as I am now.” Lin joked and she chuckled as Jun scrunched up her nose at that.

“But where are you going mama?” She then returned to her initial question. “School isn’t over yet. Are you okay? Your eyes look funny.” 

Her perceptiveness and eye for the well-being of others was perhaps one of her most prominent character traits that Jun had clearly inherited from Tenzin.

“I am alright, kid. Just a little tired and some things came up. Aunt Miyuki is picking you up after school and I will come and get you there. Alright?”

Jun nodded.

“Alright then. I will see you in a couple of hours. Remember the teacher has your inhaler if you need it.”

“Yes mama, I know.” Jun replied dutifully before pressing a kiss to Lin’s cheek and skipping back to her classmates with a casual wave. Her long black hair dancing behind her in its high ponytail. 

Lin continued her way home with a small smile, just having seen her daughter had already lifted her spirits somewhat and made her feel calmer and ready to have the much needed talk with Tadao.

Hours later, Lin finally knocked on the door of Miyuki’s home. She hoped she looked somewhat composed and quickly tried to brush some loose strands of hair out of her face as she felt the running feet of her daughter approaching the door and eagerly opening it.

The excited expression on Jun’s face quickly changed to one of worry as she saw Lin. “Mama, you cried. You said earlier that you were fine.” The tone was almost accusatory. 

Well so much for looking composed, Lin thought to herself. She was grateful when a Miyuki walked up to two of them and sent Jun to gather her belongings.

“You look absolutely horrible, if you don’t mind me saying.” Miyuki pointed out when Jun was well out of hearing range, Lin chuckled.  


“I take it didn’t go well then?” Miyuki asked.

Lin shook her head, lowering her head to look at her feet. “It is over.”

“I am sorry Lin. I really thought he would understand. What a jerk.”

But Lin shook her head, moving to meet Miyuki’s eyes. “No, it is okay. It is better this way. He said that he now realised that he would never be able to take the place in my life and heart that Tenzin had - still has. He wants to be with someone who can love him equally. And I cannot. I just - don’t feel that same way about him. I always told him that, but I think a part of him always hoped that it would change. And now, now he sees that that might never happen. It’s only fair to him that we ended things.”

Miyuki pursed her lips in disapproval. “You two were really great together. You really don’t think you can come to love him?”

“Oh but I do! - love him, I mean.” Lin replied quickly. “Just not- not as much as he wants me to.” She then added.

Jun then returned, backpack in hand and frown still on her face. “Who hurt you, mama? I will teach them a lesson!” In her left hand was a tiny sphere of blue electricity crackling. 

“Jun, no! You know better than that.” Lin chastised her daughter,  while Miyuki hid a smile behind her hand. “We don’t use our gifts to hurt people when we disagree with them or dislike them. We only use it to help or when we are in danger.”

With a sullen look her daughter made the sphere disappear. “Yes mama. But I don’t like it that you cried.”

“I know, little Pebble and that is sweet of you.” But even grown ups are sad sometimes. That is nothing for you to worry about though. I will be fine.” Lin said and Jun seemed to accept the answer for the time being. 

They waved their goodbyes to Miyuki and set out to go home. They walked silently for a while.

“Jun,” Lin then started, catching her daughter’s attention. “You know how we sometimes stay a few days at Tadao’s home or he stays with us?”

The girl nodded. “Yes, because he is our friend and we like him a lot.”

“Indeed,” Lin confirmed, “well, Tadao won’t be visiting for a while, and we won’t visit him either. He will still be your teacher, but that is all.”

“Why? I like spending time with Tadao.” The girl countered.  


it was a logical question that was to be expected, of course. Over the past two years, Tadao had almost taken the place of a father in Jun’s life in every aspect but in name. 

At the age of five, Jun had come home one evening asking Lin if Tadao was her father. After recovering from the initial surprise, Lin had carefully replied that he was not. After which Jun had of course asked who was then. All the other kids in school had a daddy after all, so where was hers.

Remembering very vividly how Lin had one day come to the same realisation when she was little, and remembering even better how poorly her mother had handled all her questions, Lin had vowed not to make the same mistakes with Jun.

Thus, Lin told Jun of her father who lived far away in another part of the world. And she explained how they had met and had grown up together. And whenever Jun asked, Lin would share stories about Tenzin and what they had been up to when they were younger. She told Jun what he looked like and she told Jun what she recognised in Jun about him.

And eventually she had decided that she would tell Jun that her father was not with them, because he had very important matters to attend to far away, that kept the world safe and made it a better place. Lin knew that wouldn’t be enough at some point, but for now it sufficed and it wasn’t untrue either.

“I know you like Tadao, kid.” Lin therefore responded to Jun’s confession. “And like I said, you will still see him during your lessons.”

“But you do not like Tadao anymore. Is that why you cried?”

Lin softly blew some air between her lips. Why did her daughter have to be so clever at such a young age? She wondered. Best to be honest then.

“Do you remember what I explained to you about love when Mantu and Lea in your class said they were in love and you didn’t understand what that meant?”

“Yes. And then they had a fight and Mantu cried but Lea didn’t and then they weren’t in love anymore but they still play together because we are all friends and friendship is important.” Jun nodded seriously, repeating some of the words that their teacher had also clearly used to address the matter.

Lin chuckled. “Exactly. Well, this is a little bit like that. For a while, Tadao and I were in love, like Mantu and Lea. But we are not anymore. So we are both sad about that. But we are still friends. Do you understand that?”

Lin looked to her left where her daughter was walking, holding tightly onto her hand but with her eyes focused on the road in front of her, one eyebrow slightly creased in a frown as she thought about this.

Then Jun looked up, catching her mother’s gaze. “You are still friends but not in love.” She repeated.

“Yes.” Lin confirmed.

“Because you love my daddy.” The young girl then declared, triumph audible in her voice at her own conclusion.

Lin’s eyes saddened at her daughters words, the girl had no idea how true those words were, and how frustrated Lin was about that. If she could change how she felt, she would do so in a heartbeat. She was her own person, independent and autonomous. So why did her heart not understand that it was time to let go of Tenzin?   


_Perhaps because you ran, instead of facing him and all your other problems_ , a little voice in her mind said. Maybe Miyuki’s advice if earlier that day had not been such bad advice at all. Her ambition definitely wanted that position as Ambassador. And she had earned it on her own merits and not on the basis of her name, for the very first time in her life she could be sure of that.   


And with Jun being small for her age, couldn’t she play with the exact moment of her daughter’s conception a little, leading the press to believe that nothing had happened between her and Tenzin that could be considered to be indecent or improper?

Suddenly all the new possibilities made Lin dizzy and she shook her head in an attempt to stop her thoughts from running wild. She would revisit all of this later, when she wasn’t so tired.

For now, Lin wanted to focus on the here and now with Jun. With a deep sigh she bowed to without warning scoop her daughter up in her arms, as she started to run the last few meters to their house. Jun squealed out in laughter at the sudden action.

“I love you, little Pebble!” Lin called out, clutching her daughter close to her as she ran. 

“I love you more and I am _not_ a little pebble!” Jun giggled in response.

..

Izumi felt excitement run through her as she waited until Shoh brought the one and only selected candidate for the position of Ambassador to Republic City to her.

And as the doors opened and curtains were pushed aside, Izumi saw that her instincts had been right.

A woman, around forty years of age walked behind Shoh. Her long red traditional Fire Nation dress and the way her shoulder length dark hair was kept out of her face by a golden diadem could not hide the other half of her roots however. If anything, the headband made her look even more like her mother, and the two scars on her cheek and the light green piercing eyes meeting her gaze left no room for doubt.

“Welcome, Lin _Beifong...”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I had a really hard time not making Lin look like a sort of damsel in distress, pining after a man she can’t have in this chapter. I hope I did Lin justice in this chapter. Because at the same time: Tenzin is her big love, her soul mate, the father of her child. If you have experienced such a love, that isn’t easy to forget and it is something you will go searching for again. And Tadao, kind as he is, just did not fill in enough of the hole that Tenzin left.  
> Until Lin finds someone who does, Tenzin and her love for him will always be her material of comparison. And although I think Lin could get past it, and be content to quite literally settle for “second best”, it is completely understandable that Tadao made the choice of not wanting to be with someone in a relationship for whom he will always only be second best...


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> So I lost count of how many times I started over with this chapter - and to be quite honest, I am still not a 100% happy with how this chapter turned out. But in the end I decided that I need to move on, and not everything - every chapter - needs to be a 100% chapter perfection. Pressure can't be on all the time. I just hope I didn’t write anyone to be too much OOC. 
> 
> I feel like Lin wouldn’t feel very comfortable sharing her inner turmoil- but at the same time I think if she had to tell anyone, she would like to tell Izumi and Zuko best, because they are the most serious ones of the group. And Lin too understands that she can’t very well omit any explanation after showing up..so I tried to find the middle ground there. 
> 
> Still, I hope you will like this chapter and I am not sorry for the cliffhanger I am leaving you with :D.
> 
> Let me know what you think!  
> Best,  
> Metope

Seeing Izumi in real life again after all those years was a strange paradox of familiarity and unease that Lin did not quite know how to deal with. She had left Jun in the waiting chamber with one of the servants of the palace keeping an eye on her. The conversation she was going to have was nothing for a child. But now that she was standing here, Lin oddly wished Jun was by her side. Just for support – for as far as a six-year-old was able to give that to an adult.

Finally Izumi spoke again. “You look good. Red suits you.” She said warmly as she descended the stairs that from her throne and approached Lin.

“Could have done without the dress, and had rather worn pants. But etiquette is etiquette.” Lin shrugged and she tried her voice to sound equally relaxed and nonchalant as Izumi’s, despite the utter nervousness she was feeling.

Izumi halted in front of Lin. The hint of a smile lingered on her face as her amber eyes studied Lin. And Lin was taken aback by the amount of emotion she saw shining in them. “What a surprise it was to expect yet another tiresome recommendation letter from Fire Fountain City, and then having them describe this earthbending woman, partly from Fire Nation decent, named _Lin_. I was almost immediately certain they meant you.”

“I am very grateful for having been offered this opportunity. But if you would like to withdraw the offer now that you know it was indeed me the city recommended, I also understand and respect that.” Lin replied. It was an overly formal answer, but she really did not know what else to say. Of all the scenarios Lin had imagined on her way to the Capital, this reaction, full of warmth and compassion hadn’t been one of them.

“Why would I withdraw?” Izumi asked confused. “I just told you I already knew who you were upon reading the letter. Why would I let you come all the way over here only to withdraw the offer?”

Lin hesitated. Izumi was asking the exact same question she had been asking herself ever since she had decided to answer the invitation and accept the position. It had been a constant battle between her ambition and desire to contribute to a better and more stable world on the one hand. While on the other hand her rationality _and_ irrationality asked her why she was throwing her carefully crafted new life away for something she wasn’t so very sure would still be hers once Izumi would know it was Lin she had written to.

“I just thought -“ Lin started.

“You thought I would let you come here as a trap and have you ambushed by our family?”

Lin frowned. “Well no, I-“ That scenario most certainly had never crossed her mind, but in hindsight it sounded quite plausible and Lin was immediately grateful that _that_ at least hadn’t happened.

“Then what? I don’t remember you to be the stammering type, Lin. So speak up please.” Izumi challenged. Her voice was stern, but in her eyes Lin could see that she was mainly teasing a bit.

Well, she deserved that, Lin thought to herself. She took a deep breath before answering Izumi in her usual clear and strong voice.

“I was worried you did not know who I was when you offered me the job. But I also very much hoped I was wrong, because I really want that job, even if that means having to return to Republic City and dealing with my family.”

That seemed to earn Izumi’s approval, as the Fire Lord sent her a nod and a smile. “Still ambitious as ever, I see.” And then, dropping the stern look and allowing it to make place for a warm expression with soft eyes, Izumi continued. “But I meant what I said, Lin. You look good. You look - _happy_.”

Now it was Lin’s turn to smile. “I _am_ happy.”

Izumi then gestured toward the table to her left. “Please, let’s take a seat. We have a lot to talk about, and to start, you are going to tell me why you left, where you have been the past couple of years and how you managed to hide right under my nose.”

Lin gave a single nod as she followed Izumi to the table. She knew this moment would come rather sooner than later. But she was still nervous.

Although, if she was being honest, if she had to pick anyone of her family to be the first to tell her story to, it would be Izumi.

Despite the fact that Izumi was a few years older, she and Lin had always been close. Both being more of the silent and serious type, the two had found a friend in one another who understood how they felt when the everyday commotion of Bumi getting into trouble, Kya having wondered off without telling anyone or Suyin throwing a temper tantrum, became just too much.

Whether it was because she had always known that she was to become the next Fire Lord, or because uncle Zuko and aunt Mai weren’t known to be overly dramatic either, Lin didn’t know, but Izumi had always been the calm and rational type. Lin appreciated that immensely in the woman.

For a time, in their twenties, when Izumi had lived in Republic City, not yet being Fire Lord, and Lin had only just started the police academy, they had been quite inseparable. Kya’s decision to travel the world had pushed the two of them to grow a close friendship.

But the past few years before Lin’s departure, they had somewhat grown apart. The frequency of their letters had diminished and they didn’t call each other as often as they used to, as Izumi’s duties as Fire Lord demanded nearly all of her time and Lin had had her own challenges to deal with.

Still, Izumi was, or _had_ been, one of her closest friends, and telling her about the past six years and what had led to the decision to leave would probably be the easiest compared to all the others Lin would at some point have to explain herself to.

“Well, _these_ , are the reason why I wasn’t to be found easily.” Lin started, and she lifted one of her feet from under the table and showed Izumi her shoes with platinum soles.

Izumi’s eyes widened in realization. “They are platinum. That’s is actually quite clever.” She admired. “No wonder even Suyin couldn’t find you.”

“Suyin came looking for me?” That was a surprise to Lin. She had expected her mother to try and track her down, purely for the sake of dragging her back to the police station so that she would not ruin the Beifong name. But Suyin she hadn’t expected to show a real interest in her departure.

Izumi nodded. “Oh yes. She was terribly worried. We _all_ were. First, we thought something terrible could have happened to you. But then we were able to follow a trail all the way to the desert, where we learned from this peculiar man that you had apparently made the decision to disappear willingly. – When your mother then refused to continue to search for you, Suyin was furious. She had been the one to notice that she could not feel your presence through the earth anymore too.”

Lin swallowed. “I knew otherwise my mother would have found me in an instant.”

Now Izumi’s expression saddened. “Is that why you felt the need to leave? Because of aunt Toph?”

Lin nodded. Then shook her head. Then nodded again. “It is complicated.”

“I have the time.” Izumi commented dryly, and she demonstratively leaned back in her chair.

Lin took a deep breath, and then she began telling Izumi her story. She started by telling that she had lived in Fire Fountain City for the past six years and that she had been working as a teacher and students counselor – to which Izumi had chuckled that she could picture this perfectly, since Lin had been able to practice on Suyin for all those years.

And from there, Lin explained how she had felt so much more at ease over the past few years. How she could live her life without being judged on the basis of her name or her status. How she was _just Lin_ there. Where there was no press, and no city that constantly reminded her of her mother and how her mother had just up and left one day. And she told Izumi how she had learned that she was in fact capable of other emotions and sensations than just being stressed, and stern and grumpy.

And Izumi had nodded, and had frowned and shaken her head along with Lin’s story. And she apologized to Lin for not having noticed more how Lin felt – to which Lin had shaken her head. After all, Lin could have said something, could have talked to someone about it – but she had not.

And then Lin knew it was time to mention Jun. Who up until then had been completely absent in her story, and who she also hadn’t mentioned she had brought along today either. And Lin had never been, and would never be, ashamed of Jun – But she still felt some nervousness about telling Izumi, and especially telling Izumi who Jun’s father was.

“There was something else that made me leave.” Lin said, and she continued when Izumi looked at her questioningly.

“Something happened. And I felt that, if I stayed, I would bring so much problems to our family. The press would have a field day. It just wouldn’t be good for anyone.” Taking another deep breath in and out, Lin continued, more blurting it out than calmly telling Izumi. “I found out I was pregnant. – from _Tenzin_.”

Izumi’s eyes widened and, her mouth slightly agape, her lips formed an o-shape, but she did not make a sound. She just stared at Lin, and Lin could almost see all the pieces of the story fall into place in Izumi’s mind.

“Are you going to say anything any time soon?” Lin tried when moments passed but Izumi still hadn’t said anything.

Izumi blinked and quickly nodded, before her eyes refocused on Lin. “Lin, I – ” Izumi started. “I am _so_ very sorry that you felt the need to leave, because of that. We would have been there for you. _I_ would have been there for you!”

Lin frowned and she felt a little bit of irritation rise at Izumi’s reaction. “Really?” She asked skeptically. “You would have made time in your Fire Lord schedule to help out the societal pariah? Because, make no mistake, that is what I would have become if I had stayed. Lin Beifong, _homewrecker_. Or, Lin Beifong, the woman who couldn’t even bare an airbender. I was not going to do that to our family, I was not going to do that to myself, and I least of all was I going to do that to my daughter.”

“No, Lin we would never have let that happen –“ Izumi started.

Lin let out a low chuckle. “I would have liked to see you try. You can’t control the press, remember? And you _know_ it would have ruined Tenzin’s marriage and the chance of more _air_ bender babies. And I just-“ Lin had to pause as suddenly a wave of emotions she thought she had long dealt with bubbled up again, causing her breathing to hitch. “I just wouldn’t do that to anyone. We were all better off if I left. So I did.”

Izumi frowned, noticing Lin’s inner turmoil and carefully placing a hand atop of Lin’s own on the table, she asked. “Then what made you decide to come back now?”

It wasn’t a question asked to challenge her, Izumi genuinely wanted to know. Lin could see that. “Because I was done hiding.” She admitted. “This job…and some other things that happened in my life made me realize that, no matter how hard I try, even when being away, my past and this family influence my life. So rather than trying to bend myself in all sorts of ways to move around it, I should face these challenges. Besides, Jun - my daughter – is six years old now. I can worry a little less about her.” Lin added.

“Well,” Izumi then spoke firmly, “what is in the past, is in the past. I won’t torture you any longer by revisiting it with you – you’ll get to do that enough once you ever see Tenzin and the others again.” And Izumi chuckled when Lin let out a groan at that.

“Now,” Izumi said, her tone bright and confident again, “show me a picture of that daughter of yours. You should bring her some time. Iroh is fourteen now, but my youngest is only 10, she’d love to become friends with your daughter, I am sure.”

Lin smiled. “I got something better than a picture. I took her here with me. She is in the waiting room.”

Laughing, Izumi shook her head. “If I was Kya, I would have caused a whole scene now, asking you why you didn’t tell me so sooner and why you left her in the waiting room.”

“But luckily you are not.” Lin deadpanned as the two women got up from their seats.

“But you get the point.” Izumi countered as they made their way to the waiting room. Lin smiled to herself, and she marveled at how casual her interaction with Izumi was again. Just like old times, as if there hadn’t been six years in between.

Entering the waiting room, they saw Jun still sitting on the bench Lin had left her at. But instead of a servant from the palace, someone else was now sitting next to Jun.

“Father!” Izumi greeted, simultaneously as Lin breathed, “Uncle Zuko!” upon seeing the former Fire Lord sitting next to Jun on the bench.

Lin felt herself grow somewhat anxious as she saw the two of them there on the bench. Or rather, saw what they were doing. Just as they had entered the room, she had seen Jun gently throw a blue sphere of electricity towards Zuko, who had caught it, then gently thrown it back to Jun again.

Lin had never asked Jun to keep her firebending talents hidden. But because none of the peers in her class were able to bend electricity yet – let alone the subbending Jun had taught herself – she had never used it around anyone other than Lin, Tadao or Miyuki and Sora.

Jun’s bright voice pulled Lin out of her thoughts. “Mama, look! Fire Lord Mister Zuko can also do what I do!” She exclaimed happily, and Lin heard Izumi chuckle beside her at the way Jun had addressed the former Fire Lord and whisper a ‘you didn’t say she is a firebender, Lin!’

Both Jun and Zuko now stood up and approached the two women. Jun happily took Lin’s hand in her own as she leaned against Lin’s side while Lin bowed her head a little by ways of greeting and in respect for her uncle. “Uncle Zuko. I hope you are doing well.”

She only lifted her head again once Zuko started speaking. “Lin, it is very good to see you. You have been away for a long time.”

Suddenly, as she was looking at her wise uncle standing in front of her in all his charismatic fire lord glory, Lin felt a hint of shame of how she had left things. “I am sorry if I have caused you to worry, uncle.”

But Zuko placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “When people decide to drastically change their lives, they don’t make such decisions lightly. They usually have very good reasons for that.” And as his eyes traveled from Lin to Jun and back, Lin knew that her uncle understood. It just made Lin wonder how _much_ he understood.

That was something to think about later, however. Redirecting her attention back to Jun, Lin saw that the girl was already curiously eying Izumi who was still beside Lin.

“Jun, seeing as you have already met uncle Zuko, there is someone else I would like you to meet.” Turning a little to her right, Lin gestured at Izumi. “This is –“

“The Fire Lord!” Jun’s little gasp in awe interrupted Lin and elicited another chuckle from Izumi.

“Nice to meet you, Jun.” Izumi laughed. “I am indeed the Fire Lord, but you can call me Aunt Izumi.”

At that Jun’s eyes grew even wider. “I can? _Why_?” She asked confused at the informal title. And then, as if her mind only now caught on to what Lin had previously said, she turned to her mother again with a slight frown. “You said _uncle_ Zuko.”

Zuko now chuckled. “You have just as an inquisitive mind as your mother has, I see. Lin’s mother, your grandmother, and I are old friends. Izumi and Lin grew up together, maybe your mother told you some stories about when she was little.”

To this Jun nodded happily, seemingly satisfied with that answer for now, before directing her attention to Izumi again. “Can you bend fire and electricity too?”

Izumi nodded. “As a matter of fact, I can. But I only learned how to bend electricity when I was a teenager. I am very impressed that _you_ can do so already now.”

At that Jun beamed proudly, and a small smile appeared on Lin’s lips as she saw her daughter so happy. Upon closer inspection however, she also saw tracks of dried up tears on her daughter’s face. Suddenly Lin started to wonder why Uncle Zuko had been there with Jun in the first place, and where had the servant gone who was supposed to look after her?

Crouching down to her daughter’s level she placed a hand on either side of Jun’s face and brushed over the girl’s cheeks with her thumbs. “Jun, was everything okay before I returned? Have you been crying?”

At that, her daughter’s expression changed, biting on her lower lip, Jun’s eyes –suddenly holding a mixture between anxiety and fear – traveled from her mother to Zuko and back again.

“I wanted to show the lady of the palace how I can bend the signals. There are a _lot_ of signals here, mama. It is very noisy. But she started yelling and then the guards became angry and everyone became angry.”

I see..” Lin breathed. “Then what happened?”

“I thought people in the palace were special and that they could do bending like me. But they only got angry and they started yelling ‘Azula! Azula!’. It was scary.”

Lin felt herself grow cold at Jun’s words. Of course, if there had been _anyone_ in the entire Fire Nation who would have been able to master this type of subbending, it would have been Uncle Zuko’s sister, Azula. The notorious woman had died several years ago in a mental facility. Lin had never met her, but from the stories she had heard that, what the woman had lacked in mental sanity, she had made up for with raw, innovative firebending talent.

“But then Uncle Zuko came. And he looked very sternly at them and sent everyone away and he stayed with me until you came back. And that was really nice.” Jun concluded on a happier note and with a smile again on her face.

Lin forced herself to mirror her daughter’s expression as she lovingly brushed some strands of hair that had escaped Jun’s high ponytail out of her face. “And you are okay now?” She asked gently. “It is okay if you are not, you can tell me.”

But Jun nodded. “I am okay. – Just…hungry.” She then admitted shyly, and that elicited a laugh from all three adults.

“Well, I can do something about that.” Izumi spoke. “If you would please follow me, then we will go to the dining room for lunch.”

As Lin got up again, she briefly caught Izumi’s gaze before she turned around. _We’ll talk later_ , the Fire Lord mouthed to Lin before directing her attention to Jun, who asked Izumi if she could walk next to her. Endeared by the young girl’s adoration, Izumi nodded gently before holding out her hand for Jun to hold on to.

Lin and Zuko followed them.

Zuko was the first to speak. “I can understand you must be worried. But I assure you there is no need. Some of the palace staff dates back from the time when Azula was still trying to overthrow me. There hasn’t been someone able to bend radio waves since Azula. And few people even knew Azula was capable of this. Seeing Jun bend the waves must have brought back those times. It is no excuse however and I will make sure staff will be talked to about what happened today.”

“My daughter is no danger to anyone.” Lin replied as she tried to keep her voice even and void of the anger she felt internally over the ignorance of the palace’s staff, that had scared her daughter so.

Zuko now halted and by placing a hand on Lin’s upper arm he made Lin do the same. Looking at him, Lin saw calmness and sincerity shining in the old man’s eyes. “I know that, Lin. If anything, your daughter is enormously talented. Although, what else to expect, given her lineage of great earth- and waterbending masters, as well as having an _Avatar_ for a grandfather, I take it?”

Lin felt herself blush and look away at the indirect way in which Zuko enquired after Jun’s father. With a single nod she confirmed his question. “I have tried to tell her as much as possible about him, and the family, without disclosing names. I don’t want her to grow up with half of her life being one big question mark.” She failed at keeping the bitterness at bay at the last part of her sentence, and her uncle naturally picked up on it.

“I did not know it bothered you so much that you do not know much of your father’s heritage.” Zuko spoke softly and Lin shrugged.

“All Toph ever told me is his name and that he was from the Fire Nation. I don’t even know if he was a firebender or not. Although, seeing as Jun is a firebender, I would guess the answer to that question is yes.”

Zuko nodded. “I am sorry that I cannot help you much further. Toph has always been very private about these matters.”

“Don’t I know it.” Lin scoffed. “It does not bother me as much as it did, however.” She then said. “Not since I have Jun. – Now I just worry over how she is doing, how her bending will develop, if I am doing right by her, bringing her hear. If the people within the palace already reacted like this, then how will that be in Republic City if she ever showcases her abilities there?”

“Worrying is the job of every parent. And from what I have seen just now, you are doing great, Lin. Jun acts confidently and comfortably around you.” Zuko responded. “As for Republic City…let’s cross that bridge when we get there, and have lunch with your delightful daughter now, shall we?

Lin nodded, a grateful smile on her face from her uncle’s compliment.

In the days that followed, it was decided that Lin and Jun would stay a week at the lalace, so that Lin could be brought up to date on the latest developments in Republic City, and knew what to prepare for once back home again.

Lin was shocked to hear that Republic City had become somewhat of a breeding ground for triads _and_ members of the Red Lotus alike. Zaheer and his three most trusted companions had been locked away several years ago when Toph had still been chief of police. It had been quiet around the network for a while from that moment on, but apparently the less powerful, but no less dangerous members of the network had started to organize themselves again.

The new chief of the Republic City Police tried its best to get the city under control again. The problem wasn’t so much the policy force therefore, as it was the governing Republic City Council that proved to be toothless. The earthbenders’ Representative blocked nearly every proposal to tackle the problems. Officially, he was supposed to be operating and governing independently from the Earth Kingdom, only representing the interests of earthbenders living within Republic City. But the motives for his refusal to cooperate clearly were based on the interests of the Earth Kingdom. Seeing as both the triads and the Red Lotus network orchestrated a large part of their operations from Earth Kingdom soil; and the Earth Queen did nothing to stop it, nor did she have any interest in doing so.

She didn’t need to, either. Public framing of the problems was not focused on the Earth Kingdom, but on the Fire Nation instead. The reason being that some powerful firebenders were both part of the most harmful triads and of the Red Lotus Networks.

Izumi, and Zuko before her, had worked hard on improving the image of the Fire Nation after the hundred-year-war. These new developments were thus less than welcome. An Fire Nation ambassador to Republic City would be able to try to change this situation behind the scenes. Someone with a thorough understanding of both the Earth Kingdom, the Fire Nation and Republic City would be extremely valuable in that regard. Thus making Lin the perfect candidate.

The days at the palace were long and while Lin was in meetings, Jun was supervised by the governess that also looked after Izumi’s youngest daughter – and Iroh, to the fourteen year old’s dismay. The governess was new and had only been appointed two months before. She had no knowledge of the time when Azula had lived in the palace, and in general Lin was glad that the governess seemed to react a lot more sensibly to Jun than the staff had done on the day they had arrived. Especially since it had not escaped her attention that in the days that followed, the news of Jun’s subbending had made its rounds among the staff via intensive whispering which would stop as soon as Lin walked by.

The governess seemed unfazed by the gossiping however, and that was also why Lin felt comfortable leaving Jun in her care.

However, later, that was also why she had a very hard time forgiving herself for what had happened when one afternoon – she and Izumi had just settled down with a steaming cup of afternoon tea – a bruised and battered looking Iroh stumbled into the tea room.

Izumi immediately jumped up in alarm, calling for a healer and asking her son what had happened.

His answer made it feel as if the floor beneath Lin’s feet disappeared, and she gasped for air as raw panic, shock and fear washed over her.

“The governess is _not_ a governess.” Iroh had stammered in between labored breaths. “She is Red Lotus. I tried to fight her, but – I couldn’t – and she got away. And she – _she took Jun_.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> here you go! I am so sorry that you all had to wait a FULL WEEK after the cliffhanger in the previous chapter.  
> I moved from Europe to the US over the summer, and this week my shipment with all my furniture etc. also finally arrived, so I suddenly found myself in the middle of finally, properly, moving into my apartment (unpacking boxes felt like Christmas in October, it was wonderful). That limited my time to write however, but here you go after all, a 4k word chapter!
> 
> In Jun's POV I really tried to make the thought process and word choises not too difficult, without the scene being too awkward to read. Six year olds can already build pretty solid sentences, luckily.  
> Also, I am excited that I finally get to write badass metalbending Lin!! 
> 
> Let me know what you thought of the chapter and what your hopes and thoughts for the future chapters are :)!  
> As for Linzin: I am so sorry for the incredibly long wait...but we'll get there. I promise ;-)! 
> 
> Edit: based on comments, I just wanted to add that upcoming Linzin scenes and the fact that Lin is returning doesn’t meant they will be happy “let’s reunite and live together” scenes per se, and that I haven’t quite decided yet if this story should in the end be romantical Linzin endgame or should be Lin x SELFLOVE (or that I should just bring Tadao back). - just wanted to put that out there ;-). 
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

It felt as if every ounce of determination and optimism that Lin had built up over the past seven years had left her all at once.

Instead she only felt anger and bitterness. How stupid of her to believe for even a moment that she could have the happiness she had found in Fire Fountain City and also return to her old life at the same time. She hadn’t even arrived in Republic City yet or its politics and dangers and the dangers that came with being part of a powerful family had already made themselves known.

And then there was the fear. So much fear. It was so overwhelming that she practically felt herself shut down completely and didn’t feel the need to do anything about it. And when Miyuki and Sora arrived the following day - after Lin had sent them a wire the previous evening to inform them that she probably wasn’t going to be back by the end of the week and that someone needed to take over her duties back home – Lin could tell from the way they acted around her, that they noticed the difference in her as well. Their eyes constantly studying her, looking for the Lin they knew. Well, that Lin was very far away right now.

The worst of it all, was that she could do absolutely nothing about the whole situation. Had she still been with the Republic City police, she would have had access to equipment and intel to track her daughter down in no time. But without that, it would be absolutely impossible. The only information she had, was that the governess had taken an unconscious Jun, just as Iroh had entered the kids room. They had fought, but the governess had turned out to be a skilled waterbender and she had overpowered the boy. Before leaving she had grinned at him and told him that the Red Lotus sent their regards.

It was ironic. Just before Iroh had stumbled into the tea room, Lin and Izumi had been discussing Jun and her bending abilities. Lin had expressed her worries that people with bad intentions might come after Jun once word of her subbending got out. It was one of the reasons why Lin had asked Izumi to wait with the announcement of her new position until she had a plan. Izumi had responded that, although she understood Lin’s worries, she was sure they would be able to protect Jun and that one had to be _very_ bold to dare to go after the daughter of a Beifong and the family of the last Avatar.

That had been the moment when Lin had told Izumi that she had no intention whatsoever to share with anyone who Jun’s father was – least of all Tenzin – and that Lin hoped Izumi would respect that – she knew uncle Zuko would. She would simply spin a story that she had fallen pregnant with Jun after she had left, Jun was small enough to play the part. 

If Lin was completely honest and if it had been up to her, she wouldn’t have told Izumi either, but it was necessary to share the details due to the fact that she needed to have a certain clearance level for her future position and it was no option to lie about anything – Intelligence would have found out. If Lin hadn’t told Izumi herself, Izumi would have read it in her file at a later stage. That did not mean however that the rest of the family had to know. It would be better if they didn’t. Otherwise, she would still ruin Tenzin’s family and would still bring shame upon the family – effectively rendering her departure seven years earlier useless.

But Izumi had protested, had argued that this was not something Lin would be able to keep hidden and that it wasn’t in the best interest of Jun either. At that, Lin’s temper had flared. And she had almost growled that _anything_ she had ever done over the past few years and anything she would do in the future was to protect her daughter. And then Iroh had stumbled into the room, and her words had become completely meaningless.

So now Lin had to wait until the Fire Nation’s intelligence unit had gathered enough information about Jun’s whereabouts and in the meantime Lin had to keep quiet. Sounding the alarm in public could be interpreted by the Red Lotus as encouragement.

As if Lin felt the desire to make any of this public. She didn’t feel the desire to do anything right now. Nausea and self-doubt were all she was feeling. She had completely failed as a mother. When Jun had been born, and Lin had finally been allowed to take her home wit her, she had felt the same way. With every cry of her daughter that she did not immediately know how to cure, the panic rose that she turned out to be just like her own mother. But over time, and with the help of Sora and Miyuki she had learned and found that she wasn’t doing so bad after all. And by looking at Jun, at her happiness and the open approach she took to the world once she got past her initial shyness, Lin had started to believe they were doing alright. She had been wrong.

Sora had picked up on the fact that she was blaming herself – Sora was perceptive like that. And on the third night since Jun’s disappearance, she had caught Lin alone in the study and had sat her down and told her that being kidnapped by the governess of the Fire Palace was such a far-reaching scenario, that Lin should not even _try_ to blame herself in the slightest.

Lin had listened to Sora, but the words hadn’t registered, nor did they diminish the pain. She did however repeat those words to Izumi later that night. Her childhood friend was sick with guilt over what had happened, despite Lin’s insistence that she did not hold it against her. If anything, Lin was grateful that her friend had raised such a brave son, who had tried his best to prevent what at that point had already been inevitable.

And then there was uncle Zuko. Who had immediately made preparations to leave with his dragon upon hearing the news. When Lin had asked him before he left if he had any idea where to start – because so far, the Fire Nation’s police units really hadn’t – he had given her a knowing look and had said that she herself probably knew where to start as well.

And Lin did. If she had to guess, there were two reasons why the Red Lotus had come after Jun. One was so they had leverage over Lin, and by default over her family and through their involvement with the Avatar, over the Avatar. The second was that they wanted Jun for her subbending abilities. There had been rumors recently that the members of the Red Lotus were trying to find subbenders that would be powerful enough to locate and crack the prisons in which Zaheer and his companions were being held. In either case, Jun was in terrible danger and the only thing that gave Lin some hope, was the fact that her uncle was one of the very few people who knew where these prisons were located. If the Red Lotus were taking Jun there, he would know.

But on the fourth day of waiting, Lin had had enough. Slamming her piece of toast down on her plate with an angry growl she abruptly got up from her chair, causing the chair to fall over.

“Enough! I am going crazy just sitting here having breakfast with you all as if nothing is wrong. I have to _do_ something. I am going.”

With angry eyes she looked at the three women and her nephew and niece who were all looking at her with wide blinking eyes.

“But, Lin…where would you start? She can literally be anywhere.” Miyuki muttered.

“I don’t care. If I have to search the entire earth twice, it will still be better than staying here.” Lin countered. Locking eyes with Izumi she then added, “No offense of course. It is just…I need to _do_ something.”

Izumi gave her a short understanding nod before a look of hesitation crossed her face. “My intelligence unit advised against telling you, as all of it is still merely a rumor..” Izumi started, and Lin felt her heartbeat quicken as she could guess where this was going.

“But apparently there has been some unusual activity at both the North and the South Pole and the Red Lotus is supposedly behind it. Father has gone to the South Pole in order to take stock. Maybe you should start at the North Pole. That way, if the rumor is correct, one of you will be at the right location.”

A thousand thoughts and emotions crossed Lin’s mind at the information. Frustration that Izumi was only sharing this now, hope that the rumor might be right and they would have a lead, fear for her little girl as neither the North or South Pole were a place for a six year old. “What kind of unusual activity? And how long have you known this?” Her voice was sharp and demanding, not the tone one would use with the Fire Lord.

If Izumi minded, she did not show it however. “The information came in last night. Radio signals have been interrupted at the North Pole – large pieces of ice have been spontaneously exploding or falling down the cliffs in the South.”

Lin held her breath as Izumi mentioned the radio signals. That could be the work of Jun’s bending.

“Whoever is doing this could be in the possession of a device to disrupt the signals. Don’t get your hopes up, Lin.” Sora said in a stern voice, yet she wasn’t being unkind – just looking out for Lin, and the earthbender appreciated that.

“I know.” Lin nodded. “But it will be my starting point nonetheless.”

“ _Our_ starting point, you mean.” Miyuki now spoke up, and Lin frowned. “You didn’t think you could go away without us, now did you?” The woman added.

“It will be dangerous. I can’t ask you to sacrifice yourselves for the messes in my life.”

“Who said anything about sacrifice. Give us some credit, will you? We can stand our ground. Besides, you need us.” Sora countered.

“Do I?” Lin arched an eyebrow.

“Sora is from the North Pole, of course you need her.” Miyuki countered. “And besides, _someone_ needs to make sure you eat and sleep. Because the past few days have shown that if I don’t drag you down here, you wouldn’t have eaten anything at all. So whether you like it or not, we are coming.”

Lin looked silently from Sora to Miyuki and was taken aback by the determination in her eyes.

“We are leaving in an hour.”

An hour later, Lin couldn’t help but grin a little at the looks of admiration Miyuki and even Sora gave her when she landed next to them on the plateau of rocks they were standing on. She had just given her new metal cables a try. They were a part of the uniform of some of the Fire Nation’s metal benders. The division was small, there were only eight of them, but they had some spare uniforms and Lin was grateful that she was allowed to burrow one.

The design of the uniform was quite nicely done. The metal was a combination of steal and copper, to give the uniform its red color. The signature Fire Nation collar of the uniform was wide and ended over the shoulders in a triangular shape. The rest of the uniform was very much the same as her Republic City Police uniform had been. With the difference that everything was red instead of black. Not a very practical color, as it would stand out at the North Pole. But so would black, so in the end it didn’t matter much.

“We have seen you metalbend before. And in theory I knew you could do this, but seeing it is of a whole different level.” Miyuki muttered.

Lin shrugged. “It is alright. I am not as in shape as I used to be. But it will do. Now let’s go.”

..

Bringing her trembling hands to her face, Jun blew on them in an attempt to warm her fingers. It didn’t work however, she had given up any attempt to create a fire breath long ago, but now her own breathing wasn’t giving much warmth anymore either.

She had never been anywhere where it was this cold, or where there was this much ice. The air was so cold it hurt her lungs. On the first night she had had a panic attack and then an asthma attack. One of the scary men had angrily shouted at her to cut it out, and stop pretending. But when she continued to gasp for air, the governess – who wasn’t really a governess, but who Jun did not know what else to call – who was a waterbender had luckily helped her.

In general though the people in the group were kind to her. Jun wasn’t sure how they had gotten here, as she had been asleep the entire journey. Once she woke up, they were in the middle of a snowy field and the first thing they had done was asking her if she could feel any signals. She had been terribly scared and also confused how these people knew about her tricks. But sensing it would be best to do as she was told she had hesitantly nodded. When they asked if she could bend the waves and turn them into electricity she had done so as well. That had earned her some approving nods and smiles from the group.

So yes, in general they were kind – as long as she did what they asked. She had learned that the first night when she had refused to eat her dinner and had demanded they would bring her back to her mother. First they had been nice, but then she had kicked over the bowl with her food and one of them had gotten angry. And they hat grabbed her by her arm so roughly that it had left a bruise; and they had dragged her to another place in the ice cave where they were staying; and then she had had to sleep all by herself in a dark part of the cave.

It had been very scary, there had been a lot of sounds and it had been very cold. She had received a coat, but it wasn’t enough to keep her warm. The coat, an ugly green color with a red flower on the back, made her look the same as the other people in the group. She was going to be part of this group now, the leader of the group had said. The leader was a woman who could bend stones like mama could, but she couldn’t bend metal like mama could.

Jun didn’t want to be a part of the group and she had said so. The woman had just smiled at her and said that Jun had a special talent, and the group would help her to become very powerful with it. The woman hadn’t listened when Jun had said she didn’t want to be _powerful_ , she just wanted to go _home_. But that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

Letting out a shuddering breath, Jun tried to keep control of her wobbling bottom lip. She wasn’t going to cry. Mama always said that she was allowed to cry if she felt she needed to, but that she also should try to be brave. Being brave was difficult though, she was cold and scared and from her spot in the back of the cave she saw the others starting to pack up their things, meaning the day had started and they would be traveling yet another day out in the cold and the snow again. And they would make her use her bending every once in a while to see if she could pick up on any radio waves. After that first night, there had not been any waves anymore however.

When a sob escaped her lips nonetheless, Jun instinctively shrank and winced when it caught the attention of the governess and the woman approached her. She expected her to be angry, but instead the waterbender went to sit next to her.

“I know this is hard for you, Jun. But later, you will understand that we only do this for your own good, for everyone’s good. Try not to think so much about your old home, it will only make you sad. Try to think of us as your new home instead.”

“I don’t even know your names. If this is a home, you have to know the people’s names.” Jun countered as she angrily wiped the tears away that had started to fall regardless of her resolve.

The woman chuckled. “You are right, that is not very kind of us. My name is Lanka. And that woman there –“ Lanka pointed at the leader of the group, “is Yuma. She is the leader of our group. She is very happy that you are joining us. You have a very special talent. One that is helping us very much.”

Suddenly Jun felt herself grow terribly angry. “I don’t _want_ to help you! I want to leave, _now_!” She yelled and she didn’t care if Lanka would get angry with her. “I want to go home and I want my mama. My mama is going to find me and then she will be angry with all of you and she is going to save me and I don’t want to know your stupid name and I am _not_ going to use bending anymore!” Her chest heaved at her outburst and she struggled to get her breathing under control again.

“Careful, or you might give yourself another asthma attack.” Was all Lanka said to her, and Jun felt herself tearing up again from the anger and the release of the anticipation she had already built up for the angry reaction of Lanka that did not come. “I am cold.” She therefore sulkily said.

To her surprise, Lanka pulled out a scarf from under her coat at that and draped it around Jun’s neck. The scarf was much too big for her, but that meant Jun could burry herself comfortably in its warmth It smelled funny, of the perfume Lanka used, but she was too grateful for its warmth to be bothered.

“I didn’t explain myself enough before.” Lanka calmly spoked once she noticed that Jun had somewhat calmed down again. “The thing is, not everyone can bend, like you can, Jun. It is very special. There are also people in the world who do _not_ think it is special. They think it is dangerous and they try to prohibit it and they even put people with special talents in prison.”

Jun just stared unseeingly at the wall. She didn’t _want_ to listen to Lanka, but as Lanka started to speak about other people who could tricks like she could, she slowly started to pay more attention. “Why do they go to prison?”

She asked carefully, and Lanka shrugged. “Because people without these talents don’t want them to be stronger than they are. Because they like things as they are in the world, where the Avatar is the most important person in the world – you know about the Avatar, right?”

“I learned about him in school.” Jun nodded.

“Well,” Lanka continued, “Friends of us, were imprisoned because they could perform special types of subbending, just like you, that even the Avatar couldn’t.”

Jun frowned, she started to feel confusion and hesitation as her young mind tried to make sense about what was right and wrong here. “Do I have to go to prison too?” She finally asked in a quiet voice and she forced herself to look at Lanka next to her. She felt herself relax a little at the comfort and warmth she saw in the other woman’s eyes. “No dear, you don’t. That is exactly why we brought you here. To _protect_ you.”

Jun frowned. “Mama also protects me.”

Lanka nodded. “You love your mama very much, don’t you?” And when Jun nodded, she continued. “Your mama loves you too, I have no doubt about that. But she has also been confused by the bad people that imprison people like us. Your mama thinks these people are the good guys and that we are bad. But does protecting people with special talents from going to prison sound bad to you?” Hesitantly Jun shook her head.

“Exactly. Now, you must wonder why we are here all the way at the North Pole. That is, because one of our friends is in a prison her somewhere. We don’t know where exactly however. But we think that with _your_ help, we can find it. So that is why we ask for your help. Not to do something bad, but to save someone. You understand?”

Jun nodded as she let the words sink in. She didn’t like the idea of people going to prison because they could do special bending. That was like when she had been in the Fire Palace and the guards had gotten angry at her for bending. But she also wanted to go home. Lanka seemed nice, but the others weren’t and she was afraid of them despite her attempts to be brave.

“Can I go back to my mama if I help?” She therefore asked.

Lanka didn’t respond to that right away, but eventually she nodded. The warmth and comfort that Jun had previously seen in her eyes had disappeared however.

When Lanka left again, Jun buried herself more in the scarf, trying to soak up as much warmth as possible before they would be going out in the snow again.

..

Zuko let out a sigh in relief when he received word from his daughter that Lin had left to check out the lead at the North Pole. Upon his arrival at the South Pole, he had immediately noticed that the irregularities that had been reported, were indeed caused by members of the Red Lotus. But he had _also_ noticed that Jun was not with them. That meant two things. One, Jun was probably with the group that would no doubt be at the North Pole. Two, he could not leave the South Pole now with the Red Lotus around, because he would have to stay here and protect the young Avatar, together with Katara.

Katara, who was already suspecting something was going on by the way he had avoided her question as to why he had chosen to deal with this group himself – usually he would leave it to the United Forces, after all.

If it had been anyone else asking, he would have easily shared with them that Lin had returned and that her daughter was kidnapped. After all, those two particular facts would hit the news soon anyways. However, it was not his place to tell that this child was also clearly the child of Tenzin, and Lin had told him she was not planning on telling anyone any time soon. Jun was a small child, so it would be easy to spin a story and Zuko – although he disapproved – respected Lin’s choice. But he could not lie to Katara. So it was best not to tell anything about the matter in general.

Thus, instead he told her that he had worried that this time, the Red Lotus might be close to succeeding. That wasn’t a lie exactly. Zuko didn’t know the extent to which Jun’s abilities had developed themselves already. But if it was anything like Azula, they would use the girl to locate the radio waves of the only transmitter located deep within the ice prison where they kept Ming-Hua. They had made sure that the prison was deep and far away enough, so that even Toph’s seismic sense couldn’t sense it, and they had limited the amount of metal. Still, it had been necessary to be able to communicate with the prison, so an emergency radio had been installed. Its signal was impossible to pick up if you did not know the exact frequency.

If that safeguard worked against firebenders able to bend electromagnetic waves was an entirely different question however. And hopefully, it was something Zuko would not be finding out anytime soon. Lin was on her way and so were three divisions of the United Forces, headed by Aang’s eldest son Bumi. That should mean that everything would turn out fine, right?


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all!
> 
> So, quite some action happening in this chapter despite its relatively short length - That is, shorter than you're used from me. This week was quite a chaotic week for me, so I didn't have that much time to write, but I still wanted to update this weekend since I always do. So here you go :)! Also, I'm sorry for the semi-cliffhanger ;).
> 
> What's more: I got myself an iPad Air with Procreate recently. So I tried it out by sketching a portrait of how I think Lin would look both in my story and if she were a 'real person' and not a cartoon. I shared it on my instagram account @Dieuwarts - it's not that good as it is my first try at digital drawing, but oh well :")..
> 
> Anyways; let me know what you think of the chapter ^^!  
> Best,  
> Metope

With his feet firmly planted on the ground, arms folded behind his back and a determined look on his face, Bumi stood on the front of his ship watching as the vehicle ploughed its way through ice shards and ice cold water. Finally they had arrived in colder territory, meaning they were getting close.

Two days ago they had received intel from one of the watchmen in the north that a group of six people, wearing the signature green coats of the Red Lotus, had been located west of the Northern Water Tribe city. That was good news according to the Commander in Chief of the United Forces. Bumi knew enough of the Red Lotus to know that somewhere on the North Pole, they had imprisoned one of the key members of the group. Where and who that was exactly, was only shared on a need to know basis however, and he did not need to know. All that mattered, was that the group’s location on the left side of the city was good news and that it was very important that they would stop the group as soon as possible.

A few days before, they had also received word from Uncle Zuko, who had said that a small delegation from the Fire Nation would also join them. Bumi wasn’t sure what a bunch of firebenders would be able to do out here in the cold, but Uncle Zuko had said they would have more important information about the specific group that needed to be shared with the forces before the would attack.

The problem was, however, that the delegation had never shown up. They should have picked them up at the last checkpoint before going into Water tribe territory, but there had been no one there. They had waited three more hours before they had had to move on. Now, Bumi just hoped that the information of this delegation wasn’t so crucial that it would endanger the entire mission to continue without it. They had sent a wire back to the former Fire Lord to inform him, but wouldn’t be able to receive a response anymore as there wouldn’t be any checkpoints anymore until they got back.

As the ship started to round a large iceberg, a sliver of green at the horizon caught Bumi’s eye. He immediately gave the orders for the ship to stop moving and change course so they could stay within the shadow of the iceberg and remain relatively unseen.

Using his spyglass, Bumi zoomed in on the horizon where he thought he had seen something, or some _one_ move. For the longest time, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. A massive mountain of ice and snow stared back at him from the horizon. But just as he wanted to lower his spyglass again, there was movement. A figure in a green coat with a red dot on the back that was no doubt the red lotus symbol, made their way over a slippery path carved out in the mountain towards a cave. By the way the person walked in plain sight, Bumi deduced that they probably had not been noticed yet. That wouldn’t last very long however, so they had to act quickly. Watching for just a moment longer, he saw a second person now coming out of the cave, while all the way on the left three other person’s showed up. They weren’t wearing green coats, like the other two did, but Bumi figured they probably were part of the group as well – why else would anyone be out there?

Turning to look over his shoulder he called out orders to his men to prepare the operation before waving at the woman looking out over the sea on the left side of the ship to come and join him.

“You ready to do some bending?” He asked once she had reached him.

The question earned him a scoff in response as she ran her hand through her long dark brown hair. “Of course I am. Let’s get this over with, so that I can return home again.”

Bumi chuckled. “Now that’s something I never expected to hear coming from you.”

“Mom needs me, and I feel like it is good I get to spend more time with her. She is getting old, you know? And I think she feels it too, because she has started teaching me more about her practice and skills as a healer.”

Bumi looked over at his sister and saw the look of worry on her face. “I’ll try to visit more when this mission is over.”

“You always say that,” Kya countered, but then she added in a softer tone, “She would like that.”

Bumi nodded, before switching to the more pressing matters at hand. After all, he hadn’t picked up Kya on his way here just for company. She was here as a waterbender on the team as well. Since this mission had come up quite suddenly, Bumi hadn’t been able to go by the United Forces Headquarters to select a team best equipped for the job. As a result, he didn’t have any waterbenders in the team that were good at precision bending and fighting and it would take too long to wait for anyone coming from Headquarters. Luckily, Kya had been staying with Tenzin at Air Temple Island, which was a lot closer to their location at the time, and thus it had been decided that Kya would join them.

“Now, look through this, in that direction,” Bumi said, handing his spyglass to Kya and pointing in the direction to watch.

“I see two people near a cave who clearly are Red Lotus…And on the left three people approaching them, but they are further away, still.” Kya said and Bumi nodded.

“I’m guessing they are all Red Lotus, and it won’t take long before they notice our presence. So it is time to attack.”

Kya nodded. “What is your plan?”

“We don’t know how many of them are in that cave. So what we want, is to lure them out of it. In order to do that, we first tackle the three on the left. My earthbenders can bend a crack in the ice of the path they are walking on so that they will fall down. Now, we don’t know what types of bending are among them, but the ice cold water will shock them anyways, so that they won’t be able to defend themselves. Then you can scoop them out of the water with your bending before they freeze to their deaths. The commotion it will cause, will probably lure the others out of the cave, and then we do the same trick to them, they won’t know what hit them!”

..

They had long since stopped to have a conversation, pouring all their energy and strength into getting as soon as possible to their destination.

They had made it to the North Pole easily enough and on their way there, they had received worth from the western Watch Tower that the United Forces would be able to pick them up at the Southern Post in two days. The journey from the West to the South was two days by polar dog sled as well, so it would all work out.

But then a snow storm hit them and they had been forced to wait it out, while the wind raged all night and the better half of the next day. They didn’t make it to the pick-up point in time.

Lin felt herself barely able to keep it together at this point. She was irritable and it cost her every ounce of will power not to needlessly snap at her friends for so much as breathing too loudly to her taste. Sora and Miyuki had been of great help so far, it wasn’t fair to use them as a target to let of steam.

The problem was that the earth here was covered in such a thick layer of snow, that her metal and earthbending was nearly useless. There was no way she could release tension and anger through bending here.

So now Lin was just focusing on the path before her. They were walking over an extremely slippery and narrow path. On their left there was wall of the mountain, covered in ice. On her right there was nothing for meters and then the ink black, ice cold sea below.

They had picked up on a possible lead halfway through their journey to catch up with Bumi and the others once they had realized that traveling to the Southern Checkpoint was useless now that they had missed their pick-up there.

The path they were now walking over had clearly been used recently. Lin stopped abruptly when her eye spotted something dark on the path in front of her in between of the ice. Sora and Miyuki nearly fell over one another as they bumped into Lin.

“Lin! What are you doing?” Miyuki asked somewhat annoyed but Lin shook her head and just pointed in front of her. “A spot without ice or snow on it, _finally_. Now I can use seismic sense.” And she was already halfway undoing her platinum soled boots when Sora spoke up.

“Uhm, I don’t think so. Your bare foot will freeze of if you expose it to this cold.”

“I’ll just have to be quick then.” Lin countered and before her friend could protest anymore she pulled her boot and warm woolen socks off her foot and then pressed her foot firmly down on the bare patch of earth, as she willed the impact of it to transform into seismic waves running through the earth.

The first time she registered nothing as her sense was muddied by the snow and ice covering the rest of the mountain. Lifting her foot and slamming it down onto the ground again, she pushed harder this time, and with success.

A small gasp left her lips as she picked up the faint presence of other human beings not far from where they were. Six people, two outside of the cave, four inside. Five adults _and one child_. Willing her senses to reach just a little further she managed to pick up their heartbeats. And that is when she knew.

“Jun is here!” Lin’s excitement was clear in her voice as she turned to face her friends.

“Are you sure?” Miyuki asked and Lin nodded. “I recognize her heartbeat in an instant and – “

A loud, deep, low and rumbling sound of thunder cut her words off. Seconds later the ice beneath their feet started to tremble dangerously, causing Lin to realize that the sound she had just heard wasn’t thunder, but the ice beneath them cracking and breaking off.

Just as the realization hit her, she felt the ground under her feet giving way as they started to fall. And then everything seemed to happen in slow motion, whereas in reality it couldn’t have been more than mere seconds.

She heard Miyuki shriek as they started to fall. Desperately, Lin shot a cable from her armor in a last attempt to hold on to the mountain. Now her years out of practice from proper metalbending took their revenge however, as shooting while being disoriented and falling down a mountain with incredible speed was not something she was used to anymore. In shock she therefore watched the cable shoot out of its confinement, only to fly through the sky, finding nothing but air to grab onto on its way up, before dropping again. She failed.

Looking around she searched for Sora, hoping that the waterbender could at least soften their landing and prevent them from drowning or freezing to death once they hit the water.

Just as she caught sight of the woman, a huge piece of ice that had come off the mountain along with them, collided with Lin. The force with what the rock hit her, caused her to fall even faster and the next thing she knew was the ice cold water knocking the wind out of her longs as it enveloped her.

..

Toph shot up from the position in which she had been lazily hanging against a tree log when she felt it. Planting her two feet firmly on the ground and pressing her palms flat against the big spirit vines, she waited to see if she was right, or that she had just been dozing off and imagining things.

She wasn’t mistaken. A cry of happiness and triumph left her lips at the realization. Joy spread through her, quickly followed by alarm however as bits and pieces of a vision hit her mind.

“Typical.” She mumbled to herself. “You return, and of course the first thing I see you doing is nearly drowning in the sea of the North Pole. Thank the spirits Kya and Bumi were there to fish you out of it. - But what on earth were you doing there, badgermole?”

With a sigh and a groan – she really was getting old these days – Toph got up and started to gather her things. It was time to pay the land of the living a visit again.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all!  
> So, thank you so much for all your kind comments and kudos to the previous chapter. As a thank you, I am now presenting you a 5k word chapter :D!  
> I am quite excited about this chapter and very curious what you think of it. I tried to get the chaos of the whole situation they're in across by switching more times from POV than I usually would. I hope that has worked and that it won't just be confusing to you all.  
> Let me know what you think :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

It was Kya who first realized they had made a mistake as soon as they saw the metal cable fly through the air. Ripping the spyglass from her brother’s hands she focused on the falling figures before screaming “That is _Lin_!”

Immediately wanting to save them, Kya had raised her hands to bend the water but Bumi, in a reflex, had grabbed both her wrists and pulled her arms down again.

From the corner of his eye he had seen five figures run out of the cave as soon as they had attacked. At Kya’s angry question what the hell he was doing, he had asked her to wait just a second longer so that they could finish the operation, while simultaneously giving the order to his earthbenders to bend a new set of large boulders into the side of the icy mountain, so that the ice would let go and let the five men fall into the water as well.

In the chaos that had already been created, none of the five men were able to prevent themselves from falling. Kya hadn’t waited a moment longer to bend the water where she had seen the three people of which she was certain one was Lin fall into the sea, while the other waterbenders on the ship worked on trapping the members of the Red Lotus with their bending and bringing them in.

As soon as Kya had the three on the deck, Bumi only had to cast one look at the tallest woman of the three to see that Kya had been right. That was unmistakably Lin Beifong. He nearly forgot to breathe as he looked at her. These circumstances had been the very last under which he had thought to ever see Lin again.

Looking to the other two women, he judged on the basis of their clothing that they were from the Fire Nation and one of the Water Tribes respectively.

Kya immediately fell to her knees beside the women. They were all lying on their backs, there skin deadly pale and whereas the water tribe woman was at least coughing incessantly, Lin and the other woman were not. The armor Lin was wearing – a metal uniform like the metalbenders in Republic City wore, but with red colors and differently shaped at the shoulders – had a deep dent in it on her stomach. That wasn’t a good sign.

“Bumi!” His sister’s voice sounding unusually sharp pulled Bumi out of his thoughts. “Tend to the Water Tribe woman, I have to check Lin and the other one and see if they’re not- If they’re not -“

Kya didn’t finish her sentence and Bumi was grateful for that as he didn’t want to think of a scenario worse than ‘unconscious’ right now. Crouching down next to the water tribe woman who had somewhat turned herself on her side, he helped her to sit up and patted her on the back lightly to help her through her coughing and spitting up water, unsure what else to do.

On Kya’s orders someone came with a couple of blankets and he immediately wrapped two around the woman’s shaking form. That seemed to help as her unfocused eyes started to fixate on his face instead.

“What did you do-“ was the first thing he heard her say in between coughs and trembling. “How - how many did you hit? ­– How _many_!!” Her voice more urgent when he didn’t answer right away.

“Uhm – Five.” He stammered. “But don’t worry about them, we got them, and we will bring you -“

“N-No! You can’t leave!” The woman interrupted him, her violent shivering making it difficult for her to get the words out. “T-There is a girl there. Save her. We missed the pickup point – w-w- we were meant to go with you.” The woman wheezed and suddenly it clicked in Bumi’s mind. These were the three from the Fire Nation delegation that Zuko had mentioned. Typically something for Uncle Zuko not to mention that one of them was Lin. But what would a girl be doing with the Red Lotus?

“A girl, are you sure?” Bumi asked therefore but he noticed how the woman had trouble staying conscious and as she groaned and grabbed for head, he moved so that he could lower her into a lying position again.

“General!” One of his men then called him, “we are receiving an unknown signal from the cave. Someone is calling for help but it is the voice of a...child?” The lieutenant hesitated, unsure if his words made any sense at all.

Looking down at the Water Tribe woman, Bumi saw her smile. “That’s my girl.” She muttered before slipping into unconsciousness.

Bumi got up immediately at that and gave the orders to return to the cave. Their attacks had greatly destabilized the mountain, if there really was a child still in there, she needed to get out of there as soon as possible.

...

Jun wasn’t sure if she had caused herself to be in even more trouble than she already was, or not. But she did know that it had become very quiet after everyone ran outside. And she also knew that she had never been left alone this long before and although she really did not want to be with these people, she wanted to be alone even less.

So in the end she had decided to use her bending and try something new. There was something out there that sent signals, she had noticed that a while ago, just before something outside the cave had happened that had caused everyone to run outside with Lanka snapping at her that she was to stay put.

So she tried to copy the signals she so often picked up on and would let resonate in her mind, where the electricity became sounds and words, thinking that maybe if she did, whatever was sending signals now, could receive her signals as well.

After she had done so, she suddenly got afraid that maybe Lanka and the others would return and get angry with her and they might yell again or make her go to sleep without food. So she grabbed a blanket and sat down as far in the back of the cave as she dared to go, before wrapping the blanket around her, pulling her knees to her chest and closing her eyes, bracing herself for whatever was going to happen.

The voices that entered her ears after a while were new. Willing herself to be brave enough to open her eyes, the first thing she saw was a tall man with bushy brown hair and a brown beard approaching her. She didn’t know him and her initial hope over hearing voices other than those from the people of the group quickly changed into fear. Maybe this was someone mean as well.

But then he crouched down in front of her, and she could see his eyes were kind and then he said they had caught the mean people and that he would take her to her mommy - and she wasn’t sure if he was being honest, but if the others were really gone, she didn’t like staying here either. And so she went with him, hope filling her chest with the promise of finally seeing her mama again.

So she let the man, whose name was Bumi, which Jun thought was a very funny name, pick her up and bring her to the largest ship she had ever seen.

Once on the ship Bumi stopped to talk to a lady with long brown hair and a blue dress. Jun looked around searchingly for her mother but she only saw a lot of men and women in similar uniforms to Bumi. Suddenly remembering Lanka’s words about people with special bending going to prison she got terribly afraid. She had used her special bending and then these people had come.

Thus, with a wobbling bottom lip she asked Bumi if she could see her mama now and if she please didn’t have to go to prison if she promised not to do special bending anymore.

Jun winced instinctively when both Bumi and the woman raised their voices in response, and it took her a while before she understood they were exclaiming that, no of course she wouldn’t have to go to prison.

And Bumi handed her over to the woman, whose name was Kya and she smelled really nice like flowers. And Kya said they were going to her mama now, but that her mama had had a little accident on her way to come save her and was still sleeping. But her mama would be fine and would be so happy to see her, and that was what Jun focused on while Kya continued to say things she didn’t really understand, like that Jun was from the Watertribe just like her, and asked if she was a Waterbender too.

And then they entered the room her mama was in, and she saw someone lying in the bed. But Kya put her down again and that is why Jun still couldn’t really see her mother yet, just her form under the covers. She was about to point that out to Kya, but then someone entered the room, causing Jun to jump, but it was just Bumi again saying they needed Kya somewhere else. Jun nodded when Kya asked if she was alright with staying alone in the room for just a few seconds. And Jun nodded, because she would be there with mama.

And when Kya left and the door closed, Jun eagerly moved to the head of the bed.

And that is when her stomach dropped. Although she was happy to see a familiar face, that wasn’t mama.

“Sora...”

..

Kya hurried into the room Lin was in while her mind was racing, questioning if this was real, if Lin was really here and if so, _why_? She pushed them away however, now was not the time. The three women weren’t in the best shape, she should never have listened to Bumi and should have rescued them from the water right away. The water was extremely cold, every second spent in it was a second too long. Severe or even deadly hypothermia could already occur after five minutes and Lin and the two other women had been in there for a solid three minutes at least.

She had given all three of them a herbal medicine that would keep them asleep for the next couple of hours. That would have to do until they would get to the healing baths on Air Temple Island. Luckily an airship was waiting for them only fifteen minutes away from where they were right now. Fifteen minutes in which Kya had to tend to Lin. Underneath the dent in her uniform, Kya had found an angry purple bruise on Lin’s stomach and she wanted to check the woman for any possible internal bleeding.

Just as she wanted to start her scanning process someone entered the room again, however, saying there was an emergency in the room with the waterbender. Kya frowned at that as she followed the soldier who had come to get her. Everything had seemed fine when she had just been there, she had already scanned the woman on any injuries and except for shock, mild hypothermia and exhaustion she had found nothing.

Quickly entering the room of the waterbender again, she saw that it wasn’t the woman, but her daughter, Jun, who was the problem now. The poor girl was sitting in a corner of the room, a panicked look in her eyes as her chest heaved in search for much needed air that she did not seem to be able to get into her lungs. Asthma.

Quickly dropping on her knees next to the girl, Kya started to bend the water from the flask on her belt. She let it hover over the girl’s chest and throat while she held the girl’s gaze in her own and whispered soothing words to her. There was something in Jun’s eyes that captivated Kya. Actually, there was something about Jun in general that intrigued her. Her aura was foreign yet felt still so familiar, as did her green eyes.

“There, is that better?” Kya softly asked when Jun did not hyperventilate any longer. As soon as Kya had spoken, a sob escaped the girl’s lips as she shook her head. “I want my mama.”

“Your mama is right here, Jun.” Kya spoke calmly, pointing at the bed, but Jun shook her head.

“She is just asleep.” Kya tried, “she –“

“No! No, no, no, _no!”_ The girl started to scream as more tears fell and she turned red in anger and frustration.

“Now, there is no need to get so angry, honey. You must have been through a lot, but I promise you, it will all be alright from now on.” Kya said, but her words didn’t have an effect on Jun, and when Kya reached to take Jun’s hands in hers, hoping to calm the girl, the child just pulled her hands away with an angry growl. And as her breathing started to quicken again, Kya realized Jun was working herself up to another asthma attack.

“I think a few hours of good sleep would be good for you too.” She murmured to herself, and taking her healing water from the flask again, she bent it around Jun’s temples, until the girl’s eyes started to close. Kya felt sorry for the child. She did not know what had happened so that Jun ended up with the Red Lotus, but it couldn’t be anything good. She was traumatized and exhausted. After she had tended to Lin, she would have to take a better look at Jun, Kya thought to herself. This was definitely one of those moments in which she wished she could be at more than one place at the same time.

Just then Bumi entered the room again, informing her that they had arrived at the airship. Kya sighed. Checking Lin would have to wait, then. Lifting the girl’s now sleeping form into her arms, Kya got up and started to make her way to the airship.

..

As soon as Zuko heard that Bumi and his men were on their way to Air Temple Island _with_ Lin, her friends and Jun, he told Katara that they had to pay her youngest son a visit. The group of Red Lotus members wandering around the Southern Water Tribe had already been caught.

Katara had of course suspiciously asked what was so important that she would have to make the exhausting journey to Air Temple Island and Zuko had answered that she should just trust him. Besides, they would travel by dragon, which would shorten the journey from days to mere hours so it wouldn’t be all that exhausting. To Katara’s protests that she was too old to travel by dragon, he did not pay attention. If he could do it, so could she.

Upon arrival, they were greeted by Katara’s sons. They were both looking white as a sheet, something that Katara was quick to point out. To her question what was going on, neither of them could answer, because they were interrupted by a raspy voice yelling ‘Sugar Queen!’, followed by Toph and her daughter Suyin approaching them.

“I am surprised to see you here. How did you find out?” Zuko asked softly as he greeted Toph, to which Toph scoffed. “She used seismic sense, I felt it instantly.”

“Can someone finally tell me what is going on?!” Katara then raised her voice in irritation. “Who found what out? And why are we all here?”

Toph shrugged. “Calm down, Sugar Queen. It is simple. Your son led a mission to the North Pole to sabotage some Red Lotus scum and as it turns out my _daughter_ was also there.”

Katara’s eyes traveled to Suyin at that with a frown and a questioning look. “No, not me aunt Katara.” Suyin spoke quickly. “ _Lin_. Mother came to get me as soon as she noticed.”

“The Red Lotus had kidnapped a little girl.” Bumi jumped in when he saw the shocked expression on his mother’s face. “The daughter of a Waterbender woman with whom she was traveling.”

Now it was Zuko’s turn to be surprised. He wasn’t sure how this misunderstanding had come about. Of course, it might be easy to conclude that Jun would be Healer’s daughter due to their similar skin tones, but knowing Jun, the girl would have been outspoken enough to speak up for herself. Either way, it wasn’t his place to clear the situation – besides, if he did, he would be the one having to answer all the difficult questions and Zuko didn’t have much appetite for that either.

“Where are they now?” He therefore asked.

“Kya is with them. Lin and the girl are still asleep, the other two women woke up moments ago and are being looked after in the healing area.” Tenzin answered.

Just then, Kya appeared in the doorframe of the Acolyte dorms. Zuko noticed that the recent events had taken their toll on the younger waterbender as well, as she was nearly as pale as her brothers and her eyes looked uncharacteristically worried.

“Ah, you are all here.” She sighed, exhaustion clearly audible in her voice. “Can someone please come and help me? I can’t tend to three patients and a traumatized child all by myself at the same time. – Uncle Zuko? Maybe you are best suited to help. I really need to tend to Lin. But Jun, the girl also just woke up, and she is definitely _not_ a waterbender as I assumed she was..”

..

Suyin entered the house after all the others. The majority of the group went to the common room to wait. But Uncle Zuko and Katara went to the room where the rescued girl was in. Although Suyin wanted nothing more than to see her sister, she understood that she had to give Kya her space while she tended to Lin. Not wanting to hang with her mother, Bumi and Tenzin, Suyin followed her aunt and uncle, curious as well as to what Kya had meant when she had said the girl was definitely not a waterbender.

She found out soon enough though as they rounded the corner. Her mouth fell open in surprise at what she saw and from the common room she heard her mother call, “I can’t _see_ what is going on, but I can hear some seriously charged crackling, and I take it we aren’t listening to white noise on the radio by choice, are we?”

Suyin slowly shook her head, then realizing her mother would not be able to register that, quickly adding a dazed “no..” as her eyes remained trained on the sight in front of her.

In the middle of the room, knees pulled to her chest and her head resting on top of it, sat a little girl. Her black long hair cascaded down her back, her eyes were screwed shut as a mixture of fear and misery were written on her face. With her hands she was covering her ears as soft whimpers left her lips. But what caught Suyin’s sight the most, was the blue dome of electricity that hovered over and around the girl. As a protective shield of sorts. Since Suyin guessed that the girl could not be much older than five, maybe six years old, making all of this was quite extraordinary.

“Remarkable.” She heard Uncle Zuko mutter and Katara whispered a soft ‘oh my’.

Zuko was the first to move, as he crouched down in front of the girl. “Hello Jun, can you hear me? Do you remember me? It’s Uncle Zuko. You don’t have to be afraid anymore, you are safe now.”

Suyin frowned a little at the way her uncle spoke to Jun. Uncle Zuko didn’t let anyone call him uncle safe for their own extended family. It made Suyin all the more curious about who this girl and her mother were exactly to Lin and her uncle.

But whatever the relationship, Zuko’s words seemed to have little effect on the girl as she barely acknowledged his presence.

“I am now going to lower this remarkable dome you built, alright?” Zuko said and when Jun again did not respond, Zuko placed one hand against the dome. Suyin watched as the blue electric dome broke down at her uncle’s touch.

As soon as it did, the girl’s whimpers grew louder and she pressed her hands against her ears with more force as Suyin saw the knuckles on her little hands turn white. When Zuko softly rested his hand on the side of her arm, she forcefully pulled herself away from the touch, while still keeping her eyes shut.

“I can sense that she is completely overwhelmed, although I cannot entirely tell what is causing it.” Katara now said.

“Well, if she was indeed kidnapped, I would say that has something to do with it.” Suyin commented dryly, but her aunt shook her head.

“There is something else still..” And inching forward, Zuko set a step back so that Katara had more space as she now stood directly in front of the girl.

Bending the water she always carried with her in a flask, Katara created a similar dome to the one Jun had buried herself under. This time Katara covered herself in it too. As soon a the dome reached the floor, they saw how Jun stilled her movements, before slowly lifting her hands from her ears a little and opening her eyes.

As Suyin caught a glimpse of the girl’s green orbs, unseeingly and unfocused taking in her surroundings, a gasp left her lips. She knew those eyes. But that couldn’t be…now could it? – Time to think more of it, she didn’t have as Jun’s eyes had landed on Katara. The older woman sent the girl a comforting smile, but its effect seemed to be quite the opposite as Jun registered the dome around her.

With still unfocused eyes and a loud wail the girl suddenly stumbled forward and ran through the dome of water. Katara skillfully bent the water into the flask again before it could soak its surroundings, as she watched in surprise at the sudden activity coming from the girl.

Before she could go anywhere, Zuko caught the girl and tried to calm her down and make her realize that she was apparently supposed to know him. Jun seemed to be too caught up in her own panic however to register anything at all. Instead she started to back away again, waving her arms around her to keep the adults at a distance, sparks of blue raining from her finger tips, all the while she was now wailing for her mother as tears streamed down her cheeks.

The sight broke Suyin’s heart and she could tell that Katara and Zuko were feeling the same way. None of them were sure what to do however, as approaching her seemed to make matters only worse.

“I’ll try to sedate her for now.” Katara sighed eventually, reaching for her flask already. But just then the door flew open.

..

Lin woke up with a start and the sound of loud wails filling her ears. Immediately trying to sit up, she fell down on her mattress again as a sharp pain tore through her abdomen.

“Don’t try to move so much.” A familiar voice said. “You have a broken rib and some severe bruises, I am preparing some things to fix it though.”

Looking to her right, Lin saw Kya standing not too far from her, stirring some herbs in a small bowl. The waterbender’s eyes were full of emotion as they held each other’s gaze. “Hi Lin…” She whispered.

Taking in her surroundings, Lin realized that she was in the infirmary of Air Temple Island. The last thing she remembered was falling off the ice cliff moments after she had realized Jun was being held in the cave they were nearing. Realizing that the United Forces had been on their way, she could guess how she ended up here – typically something for Uncle Zuko not to mention that _Bumi_ was heading the mission. What she could _not_ guess however, was whether they had been successful in saving Jun.

Lin felt herself grow cold at the realization that the answer to that question could be yes just as well as it could be _no_. “Wh- Where is –“ Her voice was hoarse and she had to cut herself off to cough before being able to continue.

Kya beat her to it however. “Your friends are fine, they are now in the –“

“No, not my friends!” Lin cut Kya off – although it was good to know Miyuki and Sora were fine, all she cared about right now was to know whether her daughter had been rescued.

Just then another loud wail could be heard coming from somewhere outside the room. Lin felt herself tense at the sound. She would recognize that wail anywhere. That was the sound of her daughter in deep distress, the type of wailing Lin had only heard twice before; after Jun had had her first asthma attack and the one time she had fallen from the stairs and broken her arm.

There was the answer to her unspoken question. Her daughter was here.

Abruptly getting up from her bed, Lin started to stumble towards the door, grabbing a dressing gown that she saw lying over a chair on the way there. Ignoring the pain, and above all ignoring Kya’s protests to stay where she was, she pulled the door open and started to make her way down the hall towards the sound of her crying daughter.

With every step she set, the wails became more intelligible. And as what previously had just been noises, morphed into her daughter crying for her mother, Lin started to walk faster and faster until she was half stumbling, half running through the long hallway, one hand wrapped around her waist in an attempt to keep the pain at bay, the other sometimes drawing support from the wall as she continued her way.

With her ears pounding and eyes solely focused on her target, Lin didn’t register how she entered the common room. Didn’t register how Bumi and Tenzin let everything fall from their hands as they saw her. Didn’t register her mother mumbling that the rhythm of her feet and heartbeat seemed off and the worried expression on her face – which was a shame, because when was Toph _ever_ worried about anything? – Lin didn’t notice either how all of them followed her as she continued her way into the other hallway until she finally reached the door from behind which she could hear her daughter’s loud and panicked cries for her mother.

Pushing the door open with so much force that it nearly broke from its hinges, she registered her uncle as well as aunt Katara and Suyin standing in the room for mere seconds – but almost immediately all her attention went to her crying daughter who, backed away into a corner of the room was calling for her mother and shooting blue sparks of fire from her hands as her panicked state made her lose control over her bending.

“Jun!” Lin called out, her voice heavy with her own held back tears as the sight and sound of her daughter’s misery seemed to transfer themselves to her own state of mind.

And at the sound of her mother’s voice, Jun’s movements stilled and as her gaze settled on Lin, her glazed over eyes became focused again. And as recognition dawned on Jun’s face, a sobbed ‘Mama!’ left the girls lips as she scrambled to get on her feet. And Lin pushed herself past the other adults in the room and fell onto her knees, just in time to catch her daughter in her arms.

And as a new wave of tears and cries washed over her daughter, now of relieve instead of fear, Lin held her daughter close and rocked her from side to side. Burying her face in her Jun’s hair, she breathed in that typical smell of her own child, as she whispered soothing words in Jun’s ears, all the while trying to calm herself down again and willing the tears to stop that had silently started to make their way down her cheeks.

And later, she would be annoyed and somewhat embarrassed that her entire family had been there to witness her cry, and dressed in nothing more than a dressing gown with only her wrappings underneath. But right in that moment, she couldn’t even remember that her family was there. Because her daughter was back in her arms and that was wat mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I absolutely loved writing this and I hope that I did all the characters justice.  
> I hope you don't think Lin was too emotional/dramatic towards the end. I debated whether I should write it differently. But in the end I figured that, when your daughter has been kidnapped and you hear her crying in such panic and fear, (motherly) instincts will force you to solely focus on making your child feel better - whether you want it or not. And it felt very much like Lin to then just go for it, ignoring her own pain and discomfort, ignoring everyone else but her own daughter who needed her in that moment.  
> As for Jun: I will get to to explaining in the next chapter why she suddenly got so much more upset on Air Temple Island than she was before that.. :)  
> Anyways, hope you liked the chapter ^^!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys, your reactions to the previous chapter were so kind! Thank you so much for that!!  
> I wrote you another 5k chapter over the course of three days as a thank you ^^!
> 
> No but seriously, this chapter is huge, mainly because I have to touch upon so many factors at the same time now (why on earth did I decide to bring the whole family to air temple island again? - because it's fun, that's why, but also challenging to write). I hope you won't find this chapter too boring. I honestly like the scene with Katara a lot and I also like the little bit of Tenzin POV that I put in there (don't hate me, pls :)). I wanted this chapter to be more about Lin and her family and a little less on Jun for now - that will get more 'screen time' in the next chapter again.
> 
> Anyways, would love to hear what you think of this chapter and how you think the rest will react. I'm definitely building this and the next chapter up as a 'calm before the storm' couple of chapters - I think you can guess with whom the actual explosive confrontation will be as I gave a hint already in this chapter ;-)
> 
> Note: just because I didn’t write Linzin in this chapter does not mean they definitively won’t be endgame. The fact is: I haven’t entire decided yet ;).
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

She only had eyes for her daughter. And when Jun seemed to have calmed down somewhat, Lin pulled back a little so she could look her over.

“Are you okay, pebble? Are you hurt? Did they hurt you anywhere?”

And Jun nodded and shook her head at her mother’s questions before wrapping her arms around Lin’s neck again and pulling herself close to her mother.

And Lin felt love and relief mix with new worry at the way Jun was desperately clinging at her. She didn’t even know where to begin with helping her daughter to process what had happened. She winced slightly as Jun’s tight embrace pressed on her ribs.

“Uh- I really should take a look at your injuries, Lin. Before that broken rib punctures anything it shouldn’t.” Kya’s voice was soft and hesitant, but clear enough to break the spell Lin was under.

And it was only now that she consciously registered the other people in the room. “Well...so much for reconnecting with you one at a time..” She said dryly, and it was a joke but it was also a way to hide the hint of panic she was feeling over seeing everyone there all at once. Even her mother, who had quite the unreadable look on her face.

Lin wasn’t sure if it was the impact of seeing everyone or the broken rib Kya mentioned, but she suddenly felt nauseous and realized that Kya most probably was right about needing to treat her injury.

Looking from Jun, who had started to fall asleep in her mother’s arms, to the adults in the room and back again, Kya picked up on her dilemma and suggested that Katara could look after Jun.

And Lin trusted Katara, she really did. Katara had always been there for her. But she didn’t want to leave Jun and she _especially_ did not want to leave Jun with someone she did not know – _again_.

And then her eyes landed on Sora and Miyuki who were standing behind all the others in the hall opposite the door, and as Lin locked eyes with them, she saw they felt just as emotionally rattled as she did – which strangely comforted her. So she politely thanked Kya for the offer, and said she rather have her friends looking after her daughter.

And so she left Jun in Sora and Miyuki’s care once they had reassured her that the two were nearly right as rain again after they had a healing session, before Lin followed Kya back to the infirmary, all the while trying her hardest not to make eye contact with the other adults in the room. She could only deal with one problem at a time right now.

“You know the drill, you can go into the healing bath already. I’ll be back in just a moment.” Kya mumbled in a clipped voice before leaving Lin.

It was completely silent for only a few seconds before she heard Kya’s raised voice. “BUMI! You SAID she was the _Waterbender’s_ child! We unnecessarily traumatized the poor girl even further!”

“How was I supposed to know it was Lin’s kid!? The waterbender, whose name is _Sora_ by the way, said “That’s my girl”, so I assumed that..”

“Well you shouldn’t assume! Aargh I am so angry with you right now!”

“Is that really because Bumi made a mistake, or because my daughter just up and left, cut us out of her life and then returns with a child that gives Sparky a run for his money?”

That was her mother and although she shouldn’t be, Lin was still taken aback by the bitterness in her mother’s voice. Well, good to know that _that_ at least hadn’t changed. Her mother was still unhappy with whatever she did, be it leaving or returning.

“I don’t even know, aunt Toph. I am just...I – Mom! - Mom can you _please_ go and look after Lin? I need some air...”

Lin frowned a little at that. Kya was always calm and relaxed, although people who knew her well, knew she had a temper much like her mother. One that only got triggered when she was deeply offended or conflicted over something. Clearly right now was one of those moments.

Well, from what Lin was seeing from her family right now, it seemed like in that case, she had made the right decision to leave and it was a very poor move of the universe to reintroduce her to her family in this way. It was logical that they needed time to recollect, and honestly she hadn’t expected any of them to react as calm and rational as Izumi and Uncle Zuko had, but hearing the amount of frustration coming from Kya over her return still made her uncomfortable.

However, Lin quickly schooled her features into a neutral expression as she heard the door open and Katara shuffle in. Similarly to when she had met Uncle Zuko – feeling something akin to shame in the way she had left things with her aunt, who had always looked after her – Lin didn’t know what to say, didn’t even know how to greet her aunt. And so she said nothing.

“These walls aren’t very sound proof.” Her aunt started as she moved to stand next to the bath so that she could bend the water but look at Lin as well.

“It’s okay.” Lin mumbled. “I caused quite a stir. I understand.”

Her aunt nodded as she started to bend the water, eyes focused on her hands, to which Lin was grateful. Eye contact could make things so much more confrontational sometimes.

“I will have a look at your daughter later. Something is bothering her - besides the experiences she went through - Zuko informed me what happened.”

Lin hummed in response. Suddenly feeling the need to apologize to her aunt she blurted out,

“I am sorry for being such a burden on you. I will be out of your hair as soon as possible.”

Now Katara did look up from her hands and her blue eyes held an emotion that Lin could not quite place as her brows furrowed ever so slightly and her mouth grimaced.

“Is that what you think is going on, Lin? That we are bothered by your presence?”

Unsure how to respond to that, Lin just looked away as she clenched and unclenched her jaw in search for an answer. “You heard my mother. And Kya couldn’t even stand to heal me.” Is all she came up with at the end.

“Kya couldn’t heal you because she is overwhelmed by her own feelings and emotions. Not because she is overwhelmed by _you_.” Katara countered. “It is a lot to take in all at once, you know. Finding you injured - arguably by _our_ own doing - in the most unlikely of places after so long, finding out you had a daughter of your own in those years - having to deal with that daughter showing us some very advanced bending…It’s not nothing, is all I’m saying.”

“I know...” Lin sighed then steering the conversation to the topic that interested her more right now. “How was Jun when you first saw her?”

Katara chuckled. “Quite the force of nature, just like her mother. She was huddled in a corner with a blue dome of electricity cast around her. When we broke it down, she seemed to become more distressed. I wanted to help her but I couldn’t quite figure out what had her so upset.”

Lin let Katara continue her work as she pondered over what she had just been told. Then, deciding she could confide in her aunt, she said “She can subbend. She can bend electromagnetic waves, has been able to do so since she was three. I have heard of only one other person who could do that…That worries me - the dome you speak of is new too.”

Katara nodded. “There are many forms of bending that we are only now beginning to discover. Not all of them are bad and it depends greatly on how they are wielded. Take bloodbending, I banned its practice because it is a grave violation of the bodily autonomy. In its essence however, it is the exact same technique as used when bending vines or the water in plants. Azula - because I assume that is who you were hinting at - used her abilities for something bad. She used electromagnetic bending, which wasn’t around much yet at the time, to fog people’s minds and drive people crazy. But in its essence there is nothing wrong with electromagnetic bending, just as there is nothing wrong with bending vines - as long as they aren’t the vines running through our body. I have no doubt that you already started to teach your daughter about these ethics, she will learn and know how to use her bending.”

Lin nodded slowly as she let the words sink in.

“Although I know it can be challenging, raising a child with a different type of bending than your own. Were you raising her...alone?”

Lin knew what her aunt was asking after and she shook her head, then nodded. “Yes and no…I - there is - Jun’s father has not been in her life so far.” Lin stammered, and it suddenly felt incredibly difficult to lie to her aunt’s face and hide that Jun was in fact her granddaughter, while her aunt was clearly trying so hard to help Lin. Omitting facts rather than lying was the next best thing then, Lin decided.

“But I have had a lot of help from Sora and Miyuki - and, there was someone, for a while...but that is over now.” Lin really didn’t know _why on earth_ she would mention her relationship with Tadao, it really didn’t matter for the bigger picture – and she wasn’t sure either why she suddenly felt so sad upon mentioning him, but luckily Katara didn’t seem to pay too much attention to it.

“So you did it on your own, is the bottom line.”

Lin didn’t respond to that. Suddenly tired of the conversation she closed her eyes and let her head rest against the bathtub while Katara continues the healing process.

“Alright.” Katara said once she was done. “I know you probably won’t listen, but you have to take it easy the next few days. I set your rib and reduced some of the swelling. But the bruises remain and you have taken quite a hit, both physically and mentally. You understand that?”

At the sternness in her aunt’s voice, Lin had the common sense to obediently nod while she climbed out of the bathtub.

“Alright, then you are good to go.” Katara smiled.

“Could I just stay a little longer? Gather my thoughts before I -“

“- have to face everyone out there? Of course.”

And Lin smiled gratefully at Katara’s understanding. As soon as Katara had left, Lin’s own thoughts started to pull her away from the somewhat calm state she had been in to a more panicked sensation, however.

Once she would leave this room the questions would start. Everyone would want answers, and she would have to face them all at the same time.

There was a soft knocking on the door followed by Miyuki’s voice asking her if she could enter.

Suddenly happy to speak to someone she knew and was familiar of her old life - her new life? Her old new life? - Lin opened the door for her friend to enter.

As soon as Miyuki closed the door behind her she pulled Lin into a hug, while being careful not the hurt the other woman’s still sensitive frame.

“I am so happy all four of us are okay.” Miyuki murmured while she still held onto Lin. And Lin felt herself gaining strength and a new sense of calm from her friend’s presence.

“I am too.” Lin nodded as she broke away from the hug. “How is Jun? And how are you?”

“Jun is still asleep, Sora is with her. And I am fine - just a little shaken and also feeling weird about being in the same place with so many people that I have only heard about in stories before. But other than that I am fine.” Miyuki smiled. “ _You_ , on the other hand, must be quite overwhelmed. This isn’t exactly the plan you had in mind.

Lin scoffed at that as she shook her head in confirmation. “I have no clue where to even begin dealing with this. And to be honest, Jun is my main concern right now.”

“If there is any way in which we can help, if only by being a listening ear for you, we’re here for you. You know that right? – In the meantime, I brought you your clothes.” Miyuki said, before holding up the bag that had been hanging over her shoulder up until then. “They have been washed and dried because they were of course soaked with salty sea water as well. And I brought you your shoes, because from what you have told me, and with your mother and sister being here, I figured you might need those once the difficult questions come..”

Lin gratefully took the bag from Miyuki. “I seriously don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Forget to eat and sleep and having to wear a dressing gown while facing your family.” Miyuki quipped and Lin chuckled.

As she set to dressing herself, she continued the conversation with Miyuki, who told her that the acolytes had arranged it so that she and Sora each would have a guest room to stay in for at least the next couple of days while they regained their strength.

It took only mere seconds after Lin had finished putting on her shoes and had stood up for the door to burst open, showing a wide eyed Suyin in the doorframe.

“Oh..” she muttered, relief washing over her as soon as she saw Lin, “I - I suddenly couldn’t sense you anymore and thought you had disappeared…Again...”

Lin arched an eyebrow. “You were keeping tabs on me through seismic sense?”

Suyin’s cheeks turning red were enough of an answer. “Well, no not keeping _tabs,_ but...” the younger woman didn’t finish her sentence as her eyes traveled to Miyuki.

“I...am going to see how Sora is doing.” Miyuki quickly said and before Lin could do anything about it, her friend had disappeared, leaving her alone in one room with her sister for the first time in much more years than the seven that she had been away.

An uncomfortable tension descended in the room as the two sisters held each other’s gaze. Apprehensive, guarded green eyes staring back into hesitant eyes in an equal shade of green but with another emotion in there that Lin couldn’t pinpoint.

Suyin was the first to break the silence. “How are you doing it? Why can’t I see you through seismic sense?”

Wordlessly Lin lifted one of her feet so that the sole was facing Suyin.

“Platinum..” Suyin whispered, and Lin saw the expression on her sister’s face morph to realization but then to one of pain and sadness.

“Were you _that_ desperate to get away from us?”

Lin wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that. In all the scenarios she had thought up about how her family – and her sister and mother in particular – would react, she had assumed Suyin would be her self-righteous, self-absorbed _self_ ; that she would make it all about her and be angry with her. Either that or she would not care at all. But the heaviness that she now heard in her sister’s voice, and the sadness in her eyes, did not match with those scenario’s.

Suddenly Lin remembered something Izumi had told her. “Izumi said you went looking for me..”

“Of course I did.”

Lin scoffed. “I wouldn’t say ‘ _of course’_. Last time I checked we weren’t exactly on speaking terms with one another.”

A fleeting smile crossed Suyin’s face at that. “Still not one to beat around the bush I see.”

Lin shrugged at that, her eyes stoic as she took her sister in. Time had been kind to her, it had changed her appearance somewhat, but definitely not much and in her green tunic she looked almost exactly as Lin remembered her.

“Lin, I am so sorry. For _everything_.”

They were just seven words but the weight behind them, the heaviness in Suyin’s voice and mixture of pain and sincerity in her eyes told an entire story.

And Lin felt herself grow so tired suddenly, as she realized that she wasn’t the only one who had changed in seven years.

“I - uh - I know I should have said that years before.” Suyin continued. “And I assure you I am not just saying it now because you returned. But your leaving did force me to come to terms with my own behavior. We - we had no idea why you left, not until Tenzin spoke up anyways. And even after he did…and mom said that if you didn’t want to be found we shouldn’t go looking for you. But that didn’t feel right. You shouldn’t have felt the need to leave, we should have been there. So yes, I went looking for you. And yes I kept checking just now if I could still sense your presence. Because you are my sister and suddenly you were gone. Spirits Lin, where _were_ you?!.”

Lin looked to her feet as she frowned and tried to process everything that Suyin had just said, trying to come up with a reply, or anything that would do something about this unbearable tension. And what had the whole conflict with her sister actually been about in the end?, Lin wondered. That faithful night that had scarred her forever was nearly over two decades ago by now - and what had frustrated Lin once, had made her _jealous_ of Suyin even, now almost seemed trivial in its substance.

“What did that Airhead say?” Was the question she settled on eventually. And Lin saw Suyin’s eyes widen in surprise, probably wondering why _that_ was what Lin wanted to know out of everything she had just said.

But if she did, Suyin didn’t mention it. “Not much. Just that.. that when he and Pema had been separated he had sought you out and things got out of hand, as he put it. Kya knows more about it. She didn’t speak to him for months.”

Lin couldn’t help but smirk a little at that, but she did feel the need to set the record straight. “I didn’t leave just because Tenzin didn’t choose me over Pema. Just so you know.”

Suyin nodded. “I know. Tenzin didn’t say that you did. But he did say that had messed up big time. That, and what was said by that odd man in the desert where I now understand you got those boots from, made me realize that I had absolutely _no_ clue about your life or what you had been up to, and neither did anyone else in the family. And for a family, that seems like a pretty lousy track record, one that I could imagine you would walk away from if the circumstances made it that way.”

Lin observed Suyin attentively as she listened to her sister struggling to explain her own train of thoughts without trying to make assumptions about Lin’s motives; and she watched how Suyin clearly wanted to leave it up to Lin to tell why she had left and where she had gone, while at the same time being curious and eager to find out. It showed a level of compassion and consideration for others that hadn’t been there to that extent when Lin had last seen Suyin.

This whole situation was already proving to be so much more challenging than Lin could have ever imagined. “Look, Su.” She sighed. “I - I don’t want you to think that I don’t hear what you’re saying. Because I do. But I am also sore and exhausted from worrying over my kidnapped daughter for the past week. And I appreciate the gesture you are making right now, but I _really_ don’t have the energy to engage. What I have left is for my daughter now. She comes first.”

Inwardly, Lin braced herself for Suyin’s reaction to her words as she would probably lash out. But again, nothing of the sorts happened. Instead Suyin nodded, mumbled a quiet of course and held so much understanding in her expression that Lin was certain all of it was sincere.

As a result, Lin found herself able to give a smile and a gentle nod of her head in appreciation. “Thank you.” She said quietly before she headed towards the door, turning there, she added, “I really do appreciate it, Suyin.” And she saw her sister swallow and nod in return before she left the room.

Lin slowly made her way back to the common room, needing to ask where she would find her daughter. Arriving there, she found Sora there sitting in a chair however, with Jun sleeping on the couch.

“They needed to make the rooms ready, so I let her sleep here. Your friends and family are outside in the garden so they as not to wake her.” Sora whispered by explanation. “You want to be alone with her for a while?” a

Lin nodded, again feeling grateful over how well her two friends knew her.

With a soft smile Sora got up from the chair, placing a hand on Lin’s shoulder as she walked past her. “Maybe try to get some sleep yourself as well. You look white as a sheet.” She said before making her way to the garden as well.

Honestly, sleep didn’t sound too bad to Lin in that moment. Thus, careful not to wake Jun, she climbed behind her daughter onto the couch before lying down and pulling Jun towards her so that she could protectively wrap her arms around the girl as she slept.

She fell asleep within seconds.

..

Tenzin watched her sleep from the safety of the kitchen. The door frame allowing him just enough space to see her there, her daughter pulled into her protectively, her face calm and relaxed. She looked different and very much the same to him. Her black hair was a little longer, the lines around her eyes a little deeper as she had aged - but so they all had. Although she was still tall and athletic, the shape of her shoulders, cheekbones and hips were a little softer than when she had been in the police force. And although she still radiated a certain independence and no-nonsense attitude, she now also had a certain peace and tenderness over her that hadn’t been there as long as he had known her.

And then there was her daughter. A small, petite girl with an impressive firebending skillset. Tenzin would be lying if he wasn’t curious as to how this had come about - not quite having forgotten the many, _many_ arguments they had had on the topic of having children. But he was also surprised by how little it actually bothered him in the bigger picture. To be honest, he found himself to be quite happy for her and he was touched by this new side of Lin that he had already seen shining through as she had comforted her daughter earlier, and now in how she was holding her daughter while she slept.

No, what bothered him was the fact that his entire family was here now that Lin had returned. He had dreamed countless of times that he would find Lin. But it would always be just him to do so. Sometimes Pema or Bumi or his mother was with him, but _never_ the entire family. Now it would be nearly impossible to find a good moment to talk to her, as they all would want to talk to her. And knowing Lin, she would get overwhelmed and annoyed, and he could very well understand that. And he wouldn’t want to add to that. Especially not now, especially not with her.

So he watched her from the kitchen while the others were trying to get as much information about Lin’s whereabouts over the past seven years as they could from her two friends. The women were quite good however at reducing their answers to the factual parts, leaving anything touching upon Lin’s personal life for Lin to answer.

Looking back over to Lin, Tenzin suddenly found himself looking back into green eyes framed by long tangled black hair. A few hours of sleep clearly had had the desired effect, as he didn’t see her tense up or look as scared as she had looked at him when she first arrived at his home.

The somewhat neutral-but-not-quite expression with what she studied him reminded him so much of Lin that it made him chuckle softly, and to his surprise the girl sent him a small smile in return.

Slowly Jun sat up, causing her mother’s arm to limply drop from where it had been draped over Jun’s side to lie in her lap. Lin was clearly still fast asleep.

“You must be hungry.” Tenzin said quietly from his spot in the kitchen, but loud enough for Jun to hear him. “If you come over here, I can make you something to eat and we can let your mother sleep for a little while longer.”

“I can make you soup, or some rice...” he added as he saw the girl pondering over his proposal, until she eventually slipped off the couch ever so quietly and patted over to the kitchen.

“Mama is very tired.” She whispered to him with big round eyes and Tenzin nodded.

“She is. So it is very sweet of you to let her sleep. Now, what would you like better? Soup or rice?”

“Soup, please.” Jun spoke politely. “But no meat in it. I don’t eat meat because it is sad for the animals.” The conviction with what she said this made Tenzin laugh.

“Well, then it’s a good thing that I know how to make the best vegetable soup of Republic City. I don’t eat meat either, you see.”

That seemed to make some of her apprehensiveness ebb away as Jun climbed onto a stool next to where Tenzin was standing at the counter and started to ask him why he didn’t eat meat. And although Tenzin noticed how she would cast a glance into the common room every now and then to where Lin was still sleeping, the difference in Jun’s composure now as opposed to before she was reunited with her mother was one of day and night.

But Tenzin’s mood changed from content to worried as he saw the eagerness with what Jun finished her first bowl of soup – and the second one, _and_ then a third one. It was if she hadn’t had a proper meal in days...And he realized that might very well be true.

He did not think it was his place to ask her about this, though. He didn’t even have all the facts about what had happened in the first place. But Tenzin did make a mental note to inform Lin or his sister or mother about this later.

“Ah, you are being well taken care of, I see.” The warm and low voice he knew all too well despite not having heard it in so long pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Mama!” Jun cried out happily as she jumped off the stool and into her mother’s arms.

“Hi there little Pebble, how are you doing?” Lin greeted her daughter softly as she lovingly brushed through her daughter’s hair.

“Good. This man in the dress made soup. Without meat. He doesn’t eat meat either, mama.” Jun rambled as she pointed at Tenzin, and he saw that Lin did not even try to hide her wide grin as her daughter referred to his Air Nation clothes as a dress.

“That’s great, kid. And you are feeling alright?”

Jun nodded. “Yes. Because you are here - and it is noisy here but not so loud as before.” She stated matter-of-factly and although Tenzin had no clue what Jun meant by that, Lin clearly did as he saw a flash of worry cross her face before she schooled her features again.

“I am happy to hear that. Let’s talk a little bit about the noise later, hm?” She said as she cupped her daughter’s cheek in a loving gesture, before straightening up again. “And maybe the _man in the dress_ wants to hand me bowl of soup as well.” Lin then said and as she locked eyes with him, Tenzin saw that she was having just as many feelings, thoughts and memories going through her mind upon looking at him, as he had looking at her.

Now was not the time to linger on those however. And so Tenzin nodded before grabbing another bowl, as Lin went to sit down, Jun quickly crawling into her lap.

“Thank you.” Lin said gratefully and after the first spoon she let out a content sigh “Still as good as I remember it was.”

“You know him?” Jun piped up perceptively, another trait she inherited from her mother, Tenzin thought, as Lin nodded.

“Yes, this is Tenzin. He is an old friend. Just like Izumi. Remember her?”

Jun nodded but a shadow crossed her face at the same time. “From the palace with the _mean_ people.” She said in a low voice. And Lin opened her mouth to say something, but at a loss for words she closed it again and pressed a kiss in her daughter’s hair instead.

Lin silently ate her soup after that, while Jun asked the occasional question and Tenzin started to clean up the kitchen.

When Lin was finished, she thanked him before asking if there was anywhere that she could have a more private talk with her daughter. Pointing her into the directions of one of the empty offices, he then watched her leave the kitchen together with her daughter.

Well, Tenzin thought to himself, that went about as good and as bad as it could have gone.

That evening he made his way to the house, where he was being greeted by a hyperactive, airbending toddler and his two sisters who were equally happy to see their father again but thankfully showed it in a calmer way.

Seeing his wife, he greeted her with a kiss to her cheek.

“How did it go?”

He shrugged. “As good and as bad as expected. The girl that was kidnapped is Lin’s daughter, not the daughter of the waterbender. There was a misunderstanding there. She is a firebender and completely traumatized of course. It is all quite terrible to be honest.” Tenzin sighed and he suddenly felt completely exhausted. Only this morning had they received word from his brother that he was on his way with an airship full of people, among whom _Lin_. And before he knew it, his entire family had arrived on the island as well.

Pema had stayed home in order to keep the kids out of the way. And he was grateful for that, but he had also missed his wife, her support and love, as he had been over at the acolytes center, preparing everything for the guests while also having to deal with seeing Lin again after so many years.

“Poor Lin,” Pema said, “she must have been worried sick. I do not dare to think of what I would do if Jinora, Ikki or Meelo would have been kidnapped.”

“Let’s hope we never have to find out.” Tenzin sighed as he embraced his wife.

“Still,” Pema muttered, “I know it is difficult Tenzin, but we must help them as well as we can.”

The airbender nodded at that. “I know. And we will.”

He would do anything to help them, Tenzin thought to himself. He owed Lin that much, to say the least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, Peachchanvidel drew Lin based on my fanfic and I couldn't feel more honored and it is really awesome, so go and check it out ^^ --> https://peachchanvidel.tumblr.com/post/634220109984088064/tethered-chapter-1-metope0-avatar-legend-of


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So y'all, three things:  
> 1\. I am not having the best week of my life this week. The working from home is a challenge this week - I am feeling a bit down and all, só I wrote ALL the angst and drama between Lin and Toph and Lin and Tenzin in one huge 7k chapter and I decided to already share it with you to get it out of my system and so that I might actually be able to focus again on my actual work in real life tomorrow :").  
> 2\. Thanks to everyone who shared their thoughts on the previous chapter and this story in general, especially the Linzin angle. I really liked engaging with you all, as it allowed my mind to shape the story more and I am happy to say that I found a way for this story to make everyone happy: Linzin shippers, Lin+Happiness shippers, and most importantly yours truly, the writer of this little piece. (Am not bending the story to please everyone, it’s just that what I have planned will work out for most, I think :)).  
> 3\. In that light a little disclaimer for this chapter: The way the story is developing in this chapter, especially the Linzin part, can in no way be used as an indication of how (romantic) Linzin might come about in this story eventually. I am not saying that it will, I am not saying that it won't. You'll just have to wait and see. All you have to know, is that I have in mind now how to end this story (I hadn't determined how I would end it yet before this chapter, haha), and I have decided on who Lin ends up with - or does not end up with - eventually. I will not be giving it away just yet, so you all will just have to be patient, and although there is some Linzin pain in this chapter, that doesn't have to mean anything. If anything, it means I am trying to keep this story realistic as it just wouldn't make sense for Lin to come running back into Tenzin's arms after seven years. Our girl is doing so well on her journey to selflove, she doesn't need a man in her life to complete that path just yet. And it didn't make sense to 'kill Pema' at this piont in the story either, because such big news would probably even have made the gossiping magazines in Fire Fountain City, and then Lin would have known about it and that would have most certainly changed a lot of things - so that didn't make sense to write either. But the bottom line: don't you worry Linzin-shippers but also: don't you worry Team TenzinDoesntDeserveLin(yet).
> 
> On those three notes: enjoy the 7k long read and as always, I would love to hear your thoughts and comments :)  
> Best,  
> Metope

The night had been terrible. Jun had woken up several times, screaming or crying for Lin. Lin had been clever enough to have Jun sleep in her bed that night, so they didn’t wake up the whole house. But it did mean she hardly got any rest.  
  
In between Jun’s fits, Lin had hardly slept either. Too many thoughts were crossing her mind. She felt out of sorts, unbalanced. Everything was wrong. She had never meant to face her family like this, had never meant to seek her mother out at _all_. And the longer she thought about it, the more she realized that her entire plan would no longer work out. There was no way she would be able to twist her story so that she could keep Jun’s parentage hidden. Facing them one by one it would have been possible, but together they would be able to identify the weaker parts of her story right away.

Honestly, she couldn’t even remember how she had thought to explain to her family why she had left without telling them about her pregnancy in the first place. That had been the direct cause of her decision after all… Besides, sooner or later Jun would mention her age or her birthday of the month before, about which she had been very excited. Then someone would do the math. And then lastly, there was her mother, who was impossible to lie to, with or without platinum shoes.  
  
So as the night progressed, Lin had come to the dreadful conclusion that at some point in the next few days - she hoped they would be days not hours - she would have to tell the whole truth to her family.  
  
But first, she had to worry over her daughter. Jun was jittery, clinging to Lin’s every move, she complained about “the noise” more than usual, would get upset if she didn’t know where her mother was and refused to talk about anything she had experienced. This, despite all Lin’s best efforts the day before and that morning to get her to talk to her. In the end Katara had offered she could have a few sessions with Jun in the days to come, which was why they wouldn’t be able to go home just yet - something Lin had wanted more than anything - and was also why there was no way Lin was going to escape the questions her family had much longer.  
  
That afternoon Lin stared through the window into the garden where Bumi was playing a seemingly innocent game with Jun, while in reality he was trying to get her to talk. Being the one who had found her in the cave at the North Pole, they hoped she might be willing to talk to him about it.  
  
The others were all hanging around in the common room or kitchen safe for Miyuki and Sora who had gone for a walk, and Uncle Zuko who had had to return back to the Fire Nation. Lin knew this was her chance to explain her story to all of them at once, but she just couldn’t bring herself to it.  
  
“So...your friends told us you lived in Fire Fountain City over the past years. How was that?” Kya then suddenly awkwardly broke the silence and Lin wasn’t sure if she was annoyed or grateful for Kya offering the lead.

Lin shrugged in response. “It was fine. It was a good place for Jun to grow up in.” She then said and from there she told them about her life in the city and how she had ended up with Izumi accepting the position as ambassador. She carefully stayed away from the question _why_ she had left, as Tenzin was there too and she figured she should first tell him about Jun first in private, before she told the others.  
  
Her mother had other plans however. “So one day you just woke up and thought ‘you know what, I am going to live in the Fire Nation and have a child there and let my family think I vanished from the earth’?”  
  
“No...” Lin said slowly, “there were a lot of reasons why I left..”  
  
“Like?” Toph challenged her but before Lin could answer Suyin interfered. “Why the Fire Nation? It seems so illogical.”  
  
Lin shrugged “That’s why exactly - and - I hoped to maybe find out more about my father. But that proved useless.”  
  
Toph scoffed. “Sure. That old story again. You don’t make me believe that the only reason you left was because you wanted to find out more about your father.”  
  
“Well, how else was I supposed to get information? It isn’t like you were very forthcoming with information.” Lin snapped.  
  
“Now, let’s try to stay calm.” Tenzin started which only annoyed Lin even more.  
  
“Fine, fine.” Toph seemingly conceded. “So, how did your little search go? By the looks of Sparky 2.0 outside you got sidetracked quite fast. Having the time of your life while we had no idea where you were. Well, I don’t believe any second of it. You might wear those platinum boots, but I can tell when a story stinks, even without using seismic sense. And your story doesn’t add up.”

“Of course you don’t.” Lin dismissed her mother with narrowed eyes. She knew she shouldn’t take the bait, but her mother just had a way of rubbing her the wrong way.

““Mom!” Suyin interfered in a warning tone, but Toph did not listen. “I think you just couldn’t stand the fact that Tenzin here didn’t choose _you_ after whatever secret thing it is the two of you had and you were too ashamed to face the consequences and that is why you left.”  
  
And Lin really didn’t know why those words of her mother hurt her, yet they did. But what hurt her even more was that, when she looked around the table, she saw in the eyes of her family that despite their disapproval of Toph’s outburst there was also a hint of convincement in their eyes that this was indeed the reason why she had left. They all thought she had left because she couldn’t deal with Tenzin choosing Pema over her.  
  
And suddenly Lin felt herself overcome with anger. “You know, ever since I got here you have been making these kinds of snarky comments. Making it sound as if I did something horrible to you and you are all the victim of my selfish actions. But I didn’t _ask_ you to be here and torture yourself with my presence.” Lin snarled. “Besides, did it _ever_ occur to you that you are _wrong_? All of you? Come on, do you really think I would leave everything behind just because that Airhead didn’t choose me over Pema? Do you think me that shallow!? Did you ever think that I might have left because it was in all of our best interest!? That it wasn’t just my own well-being that I was taking into account when I left!?”  
  
“Oh please don’t try to make yourself out to be some martyr here, Lin!” Toph retorted slamming her hand on the table to emphasize her words, making the others flinch.  
  
“Toph,” Katara tried, “I don’t think that-“  
  
“No Katara, I tried doing this your way long enough. I am not going to stay silent and listen to her spinning some story about how she sacrificed herself for the sake of the family. As if _anything_ in her life could have been so terrible to warrant such a claim. I want answers and I want them now. We don’t run away in this family! A Beifong doesn’t run away!”  
  
At that Lin let out a low chuckle. “And how would you call it what Suyin did? Or Kya? Or Bumi?! Because make no mistake, mother. We might have not wanted for food or a home and we may have grown up in peace, but you all raised some seriously messed up children!”  
  
“Now Lin, I don’t think-” Tenzin started, and it was the wrong thing to say at the wrong moment, as Tenzin so often did. Because Lin couldn’t keep her emotions in check anymore as she lashed out at him.  
  
“Oh please Tenzin, of course _you_ don’t think I should be saying this. But doesn’t that prove the point exactly!? They all got out, Bumi to the United Forces, Kya to discover the world, Suyin to the circus. And you stayed and look what good that did!? You are a grown man who feels so much pressure to carry on the legacy of his nation that you completely lost sight of your own personality, so much so that you got a complete meltdown the moment that perfect little picture you had painted for yourself with Pema threatened to break. Then you came whining to me and I was _stupid_ enough to go along with it, because what did _I_ know!? I was doing the exact same thing after all, learning metalbending as soon as possible to make my mother proud; never showing my emotions, hard on the outside, hard on the inside, to make my mother proud; join the police force, to make my mother proud - every stupid, damned thing in my life, I did it to take my mother proud, while completely blind to the fact that _my_ _mother_? My mother can never be proud of me, because my mother rather had I didn’t exist! And then I _finally_ have the courage to break free, because it is not just me anymore it is me and my child. And the press would have a field day trying to find out who the father of this child out of wedlock would be, and the scandal it would cause if I stayed would be bad for everyone in this room. So I leave – I leave everyone and everything behind and then I end up back here again due to circumstances outside of my control and then that same mother has the audacity to call me a coward!? I am sorry but I am not having it!”  
  
It was completely silent when she was done yelling. And somewhere mid-rant Lin had gone from sitting down to standing, and she wasn’t quite sure if she should use the opportunity to bolt or that she should stay. And they were all staring at her with wide eyes, and Kya and Suyin held a look of disbelieve on their face whereas Tenzin looked sad and her mother’s face was contorted in anger. But it was Katara’s expression, a mixture of hurt and sadness that made Lin realize what she had just said and what she had just confessed. And a low “shit” escaped her lips before she bolted.

..

The silence Lin left behind was deafening until Toph scoffed “What a load of bullshit.” And Tenzin got up abruptly mumbling something unintelligible just so that he could escape as soon as possible. Leaving only Katara Toph, Suyin and Kya behind.

Just then Jun ran back into the house followed by Bumi who apologized and said he really couldn’t keep her away any longer. Sensing the tension in the room, the commander of the united forces made himself scarce as soon as possible, leaving Jun behind with the others.

With a panicked look in her eyes, Jun looked around the room before wanting to know where her mother was. And her breathing quickened as her eyes scanned the group of people but didn’t find the person she was looking for.

It was Suyin who eventually said that Lin was only getting some fresh air and promised to be back soon. And surprisingly, Jun seemed to accept the answer as she calmly walked over to Suyin and asked in a small voice if she could sit with her.

Suyin nodded and pulled Jun onto her lap before introducing herself as Lin’s sister and Aunt Su, not having had the chance yet to do so before.

“You look like me, aunt Su. Black hair, green eyes, same colour. That’s fun. ” Jun mumbled as she put her hand on top of Suyin’s hand. And the innocence of the remark instantly pulled all the tension away from the room - as the other adults relaxed and engaged in conversation with Jun, while Suyin introduced Toph and Katara to her as well.

Jun’s eyes widened in surprise as Suyin mentioned that Toph was her grandmother. “You are mama’s mama?” She asked, to which Toph gave a short nod.

“Mama says you are a hero.”

In light of Lin’s previous outburst, those words – meant as a compliment – hurt Toph more than she wanted to acknowledge.

“Well I don’t know about that, kiddo.” She mumbled.

But Jun, in all her innocence persisted. “She says you helped the Avatar defeat the bad guys and that you are the best earthbender in the world and that you can tell really good jokes and are really brave.”

“I am surprised your mom bothered to tell you about your family at all.” Toph replied bitterly, earning her a disapproving look from Katara. “Don’t let your frustration out on Jun, Toph. She has done nothing wrong.”

Oblivious to it all, Jun continued. “She told lots. But I never met any of my family. This is nice.” She sighed. “Now there is Aunt Izumi, and Aunt Su, and Aunt Kya and Grandma Toph, and Uncle Zuko and Uncle Bumi and Uncle Tenzin and Aunt Katara.”

“What stories did she tell you about your family, Jun?” Kya asked with an interested look on her face. It earned her an equally disapproving look from her mother however. “It isn’t correct to pry for information by using her daughter, Kya.” Katara mumbled, but the older woman didn’t stop Jun when she started to talk.

“Mama said my family lives _far_ away from home, because they work to make the world safe and that is very difficult. That is also why my daddy cannot visit. He lives far away in a very big city on an island. And he is really tall and mama says that I am good at being patient and listening, just like him. And sometimes she tells stories about when she was little and she and my daddy would play together and play tricks on people.” Jun chuckled and it went unnoticed to her young mind how the smiles on the adults’ faces had disappeared and had made place for shock and realization as they put all the dots together.

“I’m going to _kill_ him, this time for real.” Kya growled, while Katara sadly shook her head and Suyin let out a defeated sigh.

“How can only _two_ people create such a mess for themselves.” Toph sighed and at that Suyin whipped her head up and looked at her mother sharply. “Have you heard _nothing_ of what Lin just said? She wasn’t that far off, you know.” And Toph saw Kya give a nod in agreement.

“You too? – Don’t listen to my ungrateful kids, Katara.”

But the older woman slowly shook her head as she took Kya’s hands over the table in one of her own, while placing the other on Suyin’s shoulder. “We made mistakes, Toph. We made mistakes and we all worked through it. Even Tenzin did eventually. But he did it with our help. I think it is time you help Lin now to do the same.”

Toph shrugged “Good luck with that. I don’t think she’ll let me.”

“Oh please, you are not even going to try?” Suyin asked incredulously. “Does it really not bother you that your eldest daughter just basically confessed that she thinks her own mother doesn’t _love_ her? That she thinks you don’t _want_ her here?! If circumstances had been any different I would be worried senselessly by those words, since it looks to me as if her leaving was the _least_ radical thing she could do if that really is how she feels!”

“Don’t raise your voice like that. You are scaring the kid.” Toph countered.

Jun indeed say with a winced expression still on Suyin’s lap.

“Yes, well-“ Suyin said in a clipped voice before looking down at Jun and gently cupping the girl’s face as an indication that everything was alright. “You’re not making that very easy.”

“Then I’ll go.” Toph snapped before standing up and leaving the room.

As she walked, she started to pick up on an erratic heartbeat and frantic steps coming from outside the house. Redirecting her intended path to her room to go outside instead, she felt her eldest daughter pacing back and forth on one of the hills furthest away from the house. Lin had kicked off her shoes apparently, something she had always done, even when she was a kid, when she was upset. The feeling of the earth helped her to ground, and Toph could understand that.

Her stomach twisted at seeing her daughter like this, however. It wasn’t a sight she had often gotten to see. And those inside might think that Lin’s words had no effect on her, but the truth was that they added to the worry and guilt she was already feeling. She just wasn’t very good at expressing it. Instead of showing her vulnerable side, she would lash out – like she had done just now. She knew it wasn’t fair towards Lin thought, and it brought them no further either. And Suyin had been spot on when she had said Lin’s words would scare her senselessly. They did. Toph had no clue that Lin thought so little of herself, and especially thought that Toph did not love her.

She started to make her way up the hill. Lin was too caught up to notice, but had moved from pacing to sitting on top of the hill, legs dangling over the edge of it, because whereas a hill on this side, on the other side it was a cliff.

“If you came to yell at me you can save it.” Her daughter snapped when she was only a few meters away. Her voice sounded heavy with held back tears.

“I didn’t come to yell.” Toph calmly said as she went to sit down next to Lin. She felt her daughter tense and for a moment she thought Lin would get up and walk away, but surprisingly she stayed.

“When we won, when Aang defeated the Fire Lord, I was so happy and so proud of him that I stomped him on his arm so hard that Katara had to heal it.” Toph started. “And when you were born I did it again, but this time it was Sokka who took the hit. Katara still had to heal it though.” She grinned but Lin didn’t react. Her daughter was completely silent next to her except for an occasional sniff or shuddered breath. Still fighting the tears then.

“As a kid you cried a lot, but as you grew up that became less. In general you only cried when others were hurt. Never when you hurt yourself. And as you got older you didn’t cry at all. You’re different in that sense and – ”

“I really don’t know what you’re going on about here. But honestly I am not very much in the mood for a trip down memory lane to hear about everything I did wrong or the ways in which I wasn’t what you wanted me to be.”

Toph sighed. Was she really that bad with words for Lin to still get it wrong?

“Kid!” She therefore said firmly, “the point of me saying this, is to explain to you that I don’t do well with expressing my emotions and my feelings. But that doesn’t mean I don’t love you! How on _earth_ did you manage to get in your head that I dont love you!? We had our arguments in the past, but surely they don’t outweigh the fact that you are my daughter? I will _always_ love you!”

She felt Lin stiffen next to her and there was silence for a moment. “You have never said that to me out loud. _Never_.”

“I didn’t think I had to. Suyin seemed to be fine and she knows I love her all the same, and I thought you would too.”

“Yes. Well, I am not Suyin. Sorry to disappoint.” Lin went on the defensive again and Toph sighed.

“I know that, kid. And I am sorry to hear how you felt. It’s just, back in the day, you tried so hard and every time we spoke it ended in an argument.”

“Sorry for trying to make you proud - and failing.”

“Spirits, kid! Are you just purposefully not hearing what I’m saying? I _am_ proud of you! I just - I just found it hard to see you trying so hard and I sometimes wondered if the police force was even really what you wanted.” Toph sighed.

She felt Lin tense beside her even more at that. “Well if you had just maybe taken the time to tell me that, I wouldn’t have needed to _try_ so hard!”

Toph didn’t know how to respond to that. Maybe Lin was right, maybe she should have confronted her daughter about it. But at the same time, Lin should know she was not good with words, and she had thought Lin was the same. She had thought they had had an understanding between the two of them that they were more about doing things than speaking about things. But Toph could now see how that had just been Lin trying to accommodate her, pushing away her own feelings. People would say Lin was just like her mother and Suyin was the unruly one. But at the end of the day, it was Suyin who took the most after her mother by just being herself, whereas Lin was the one who maybe looked the part, but was so different on the inside.

“You know,” Toph then started, breaking the silence that had descended, “your daughter came in just now and mentioned a thing or two about what you have told her about her father...and I get it now. I get why you left - But spirits, _Lin_ I wish you would have just come to me. I would have come up with a plan that would keep you and your kid out of the press. I would have even found a way so that Twinkletoes 2.0 wouldn’t find out, if that is really what you wanted. But at least you wouldn’t have had to leave..” Toph felt herself almost gasping for air as she suddenly struggled to keep control of her emotions. Now that she had opened the gate, it seemed like everything came pouring out at once. “I wouldn’t have had to _miss_ you so.”

At that she heard a strangled sob leave Lin, as her daughter finally seemed to break upon realizing what Toph was saying without using so many words. “You can’t tell him. You _can’t_.” She sobbed. “I – I just, I - oh damn it I think you _broke_ me, I - I can’t even breathe without crying.” And it was all Toph could stand to hear before, in a bold move, she mumbled a ‘come here’ and pulled Lin into her, wrapping her arms firmly around her daughter.

She felt Lin go rigid and somewhat resist the embrace mumbling ‘no, no, you don’t – ’ against her shoulder, but what it was she didn’t have to do, Toph didn’t wait for as she just tightened her arms around Lin. “Yes I do, Linny. I really do.” She countered. “You know - you scared the crap out of me when you left and I couldn’t even follow you through the earth or the spirit vines anymore. And I figured that maybe you didn’t want me in your life anymore. _That_ is why I didn’t go looking for you, _not_ because I didn’t love you. And I felt so hurt and guilty when you returned and it turned out you had had a daughter of your own and we all knew nothing about it. Because I _do_ want you to be on this earth, Lin. I do want you to exist and preferably I want you to exist somewhere where I can _see_ you, can find you, can talk to you. You are my daughter, my little badgermole who could already metalbend at eight. My sensitive, pensive, Lin who tries so hard for the world to see her as the opposite. And you are so good at it that you even succeeded in making me believe it. “

And as Toph calmly brushed through Lin’s hair, like she would always do when Lin was a child, she felt her daughter relax under her touch as she cried, until her sobs grew quieter and her breathing calmer again.

“And you know what,” Toph spoke after a while, “it is of course your decision to make. But if you don’t tell him, that is not all that different from how I did not tell Su. And I _know_ you have an opinion about that..”

“I know..” Lin muttered. “None of this was supposed to go as it went.”

Toph chuckled “That’s life, kid.”

“I just want what is best for Jun. And I don’t know if he is. If he always puts his sense of duty before me, then who is to say he won’t do the same with Jun? She doesn’t airbend, she is a _firebender_ for spirit’s sake.”

“Tenzin has changed.” Toph said. “A lot. He is more mature, less anxious, less on edge. I can feel it in his heartbeat and Katara has noticed it too. I know your ship has probably sailed, he seems pretty happy with Pema and they have three kids and all – And I don’t think you are really looking for a rekindling of your relationship either, but it wouldn’t hurt to try to establish some sort of connection again for the kid’s sake. Don’t make the mistake I made with Sokka..”

“Yeah...” Lin sighed, “Closure would be nice.”

“Exactly.” Toph nodded and by now, Lin had moved from leaning against Toph to lying next to her with her head in her mother’s lap, and Toph had to admit, she loved it. If anyone would ask later, she would deny it all, but she loved this sappy moment with her daughter close to her again.

“Was my father a firebender?” The question came out of nowhere and Toph stilled the hand that had still been brushing through Lin’s hair.

“He was...” she then said slowly. “Though not nearly as talented as your kid is. She clearly inherited the skill from her parents.” She sighed then. She figured, as they were being honest with each other, now had come the time to finally tell her daughter why she had always refused to give more information about Kanto. “I know you want to know more about him. It’s just – as soon as you were born and I said I sensed you were going to be an earthbender, he lost interest in us. Or actually, in you. So I showed him the door. I didn’t tell you much about him because I didn’t want you to know that. I didn’t want you to feel as if you weren’t good enough... Although apparently I kind of failed in that anyways.”

She could nearly hear her daughter’s brain processing what she had just told her and Toph worried that she had made the wrong decision telling Lin after all. But then Lin nodded. “Thank you for telling me that. I just thought you never talked about him to spite me.”

“I am sorry I made you feel that way, kid.”

They sat like that for a little while longer until Toph felt the patter of small feet approaching them.

“Mama are you okay?”

Sitting up Lin turned to look at her daughter.

“I am, Pebble. Don’t you worry.”

“You cried.” Jun’s voice sounded accusatory and Toph chuckled as it reminded her of Lin.

“I did,” Lin confirmed, “but I am okay now.”

“Your mom made it better then?” Jun questioned as she approached the two woman and went to sit in Lin’s lap.

“She did.” And Toph felt a weight lift from her shoulders as she senses the sincerity of her daughter’s words, a smile appearing on her face.

“I’ll do better from now on, kiddo. I will really try to do better.” Toph said, to which Lin mumbled a thank you before redirecting her attention to her daughter and complimenting her for not having panicked while Lin had been in the garden.

 _Right_ , Toph thought at that. One Beifong’s troubles solved, but another one to go. And by the permanent anxiety lacing her granddaughter’s heartbeat, that was going to be a tough nut to crack as well..

..

Lin found Tenzin in his usual meditating spot. It was evening now and Jun was already asleep, with Miyuki watching over her.

Although Lin felt emotionally exhausted already, she still forced herself to go through with what she was about to do. With her secret out to most of her family it wouldn’t take long before someone would accidentally tell Tenzin about Jun, and she wanted to be ahead of that. That, and she wasn’t sure if she could go through with all this intrigue for much longer herself either.

“Meditation still working for you when you are troubled, hm?” She made her presence known as she went to sit down on a stone bench not far from where Tenzin was sitting in the grass.

Opening his eyes slowly he looked directly at her and she could see he too was plagued by many thoughts and feelings - and in just a couple of minutes she was going to add some more to that.

“I need to tell you two things.” Lin continued before he could speak. “And I want you to let me finish, and after that you can do whatever you want, yell at me, ignore me, fight me, whatever. But I need you to know that I will _always_ protect my daughter, no matter what your reaction will be; and I need you to know that I am not expecting anything from you. I made it this far without any problems - well except for the recent events - and we will be fine in the future as well.”

She saw the airbender frown at her cryptic words. “What are you taking about?”

“First say you will respect that.”

“I - but what are we talking about?”

Lin sighed. “Come on, Tenzin. Just say you will let me finish and that you understand what I just said.”

“I - uh - alright.” He then nodded.

“Good. So, the first thing is that I want to apologize for my earlier outburst.” Lin said matter-of-factly, “Although I stand by what I said and how I see what happened seven years ago, I shouldn’t have yelled it the way I did in front of our entire family just because my mother got on my nerves. Secondl-“

“Lin I-“

“Hey, I said no interfering!” She snapped and Tenzin abruptly closed his mouth again, gesturing for her to go ahead.

“Secondly, I need you to know that I somewhat twisted the sequence of things when I told you all why I left earlier. You see, I - uh - I was already pregnant when I left and – ”Spirits this was so much harder than she had thought it would be. She wished the earth would just open and swallow her right now – and as a matter of fact, that was a scenario she could make happen herself, and it suddenly, _really,_ was an interesting way out if she didn’t know any better. Taking another deep breath, Lin then continued“The thing is - well, Jun is _yours_ and that is why I left, because staying meant scandal and pain for all of us and I wasn’t going to let that happen. Least of all to my child.”

She saw his eyes widen. She saw his mouth opening and closing with no words coming out. She felt his heartbeat pick up. She saw his brows furrow, his hands curling into the grass as he processed this.

“You can speak now - if you want.” She added superfluously and his head whipped up at her words and although it shouldn’t come as a surprise, she was still taken aback by the raw emotion reflected in his grey eyes.

“I am so sorry, Lin.” And _that_ she hadn’t expected at all. She had expected him to yell at her, or ignore her altogether, but not this.

“What are you sorry for exactly?” She asked tentatively, because in her book there were a thousand things in their lives where he owed her an apology for.

“For having treated you the way I did back then - on that night. For saying the things I said and then doing the complete opposite the following morning. And to know now that I did not only hurt you by that, but also our child.”

Lin shifted uncomfortably as he referred to Jun as _their_ child - she wasn’t used to thinking of Jun as someone else than her child alone.

“I - I know you didn’t just leave because of what I did. I know you better than that and for your mother to suggest that was a very low blow.” Tenzin continued, and Lin watched him as he struggled with carefully choosing the rights words for what he wanted to say. “But I do know that our history, our past actions shaped our lives, both yours and mine, the way that it did. And that _did_ contribute to you feeling the need to leave. And although I understand better now, after what you just told me, _why_ you did this - it still pains me and I feel very ashamed that in a time where you needed the support of all of us, being pregnant – instead you felt it was best if you left, thinking more of others than of yourself.”

“Well, it didn’t turn out so bad for me either to leave..” Lin countered halfheartedly, and she let her words linger as she studied Tenzin and this completely unexpected reaction of his. “I am sorry,” she mumbled then, “I don’t get it. Mom said you changed and Izumi said it too, but still, I expected you to throw a tantrum over this news, not _apologize_ for it...”

He looked at her at that with sad eyes “Don’t make the mistake into thinking I am not sad or hurt over not having been part of my daughter’s life for six years. I am, and I will need time to process.”

Lin nodded in understanding.

“But I have learned a lot in the years since you left. I talked to a lot of people - learned to separate my father’s expectations of who I am expected to be, from who I actually am. I wasn’t able to do that back then. And, I - I learned to love Pema over time, and I love my children, of course I do – but there always was a discrepancy back then between the Tenzin I felt I _needed_ to be, who loved his wife and who would rebuild the air nation. And the Tenzin I actually _wanted_ to be and who I deep down already _was_ , who – ”And the airbender swallowed, and looking down at the patch of grass in front of him, he continued in a whisper, “who would have been okay with not having children if it meant staying with his first and most-loved love.”

And Lin felt her face contort in sadness at his confession. Because wasn’t that exactly what she had come to understand about Tenzin in the years apart? And wasn’t the way he described what he felt for Pema not exactly the same as she had felt about Tadao? Although she had not been able to go through with it whereas he had forced himself to do the opposite. And to be honest, she really wasn’t sure who was better off. The man who learned to love a woman that was not his soulmate, pushing to the back of his mind the hope of ever finding the kind of all-encompassing love he had come to known again; or the woman who held onto the memory of that love for dear life, unable to properly move on as a result. They were two different ways of dealing with the exact same problem that they had had equal parts in creating it. One was definitely not better than the other.

“We both felt that pressure, Tenzin. And in hindsight I should have opened up to you about it more.” Lin offered and suddenly feeling the need to clarify, she added. “I never wanted _not_ to have any children. I just didn’t look forward to becoming a _broodmare_ for new airbenders when the genetical statistics were so low of that happening - and then I hadn’t even been taking into account that our child could be a firebender.”

Tenzin shook his head. “Although _now_ , I understand that so very well - I doubt if I would have even heard what you were saying if you had explained it to me back then. I feel like I was in some sort of permanent overdrive to live up to my father's expectations. Everything and everyone had to make way for me to achieve that goal.”

“Don’t I know it..” Lin replied sounding accidentally more bitter than she had meant to, but expressing quite well how she felt. “Are you at least happy with her?”

Tenzin sighed. “I don’t think I can ever take back my actions. You should know that I did tell Pema, about that night. I felt that if I wanted to make things right, I should start by being honest. She didn’t speak to me for weeks and things remained tensed until well after Ikki was born. I stayed for the sake of the kids at that time. I figured that for once I shouldn’t put myself or the legacy first, but someone else’s wellbeing. I went to seek you out as well, but by that time you had already left - and now I realize that by taking the approach I took, I still managed to disadvantage one of my children and hurt you as well.” He let out a bitter chuckle before looking at Lin again. “I - I hope you will allow me to make that up to you.”

“It took me a long time to get past the point of feeling used.” Lin replied, looking away to an imaginary point in the distance as she showed herself so vulnerable to him. “And even after that point...I was in a relationship...but I couldn’t commit, not to the same degree as he did. It made me realize that going away might have been good for everyone back here and for Jun, but in the end it wasn’t good for me. Because I didn’t get any closure. If this entire mess with the Red Lotus hadn’t happened, I had meant to seek you out at some point, to show my daydreaming brain that there is no love lost between us anymore, and then I had meant to leave again. I was never planning on telling you about Jun.” Lin confessed.

“But then all of this happened, and I realized that what I had been planning on doing was unrealistic and unfair to both you and Jun. But the fact remains that you hurt me more than anyone in my entire life has ever hurt me, Tenzin. And although I will allow you to see Jun if you want to, will allow you to establish a relationship with her. And although you will always have a special place in my heart, I want nothing from you and least of all do I want to see you groveling for my forgiveness. I simply don’t see what good that will do. It won’t change the past and it won’t change the future. I am happy, I have a good life. So do you. This has to be about closure, not about revisiting the past.”

Lin didn’t wait for Tenzin to reply to her words, instead she stood up and made her way down the hill again, all the while clenching her hands into fists to keep it together. She meant what she had just said. It was surprising to her, but the emotions and feelings she had felt back in Fire Fountain City whenever she would think back to her past with Tenzin – about how she had felt when they still had been together - and how that was not how she felt about Tadao, all those feelings did not resurface when she looked at Tenzin now. He had changed, as had she. The love they had shared was something of the past, she knew that for a fact now. And although she mourned its loss, she was also happy about feeling that way, for it meant that her mind had finally moved on from the past and into the future.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,
> 
> Thanks to all of you who commented on the previous chapter and wished me well. I do feel better again, it was just one of those weeks where the quarantine got to me. 
> 
> That is also why this is a bit of a shorter chapter, and I am not too happy with it. But oh well, not striving for perfection every now and then is ok too, I guess. I still generally like the chapter and it allows the story to continue and change scenery again, which I think is good. 
> 
> I also did another digital drawing (or an attempt at least) of Lin as she reunited with Jun. You can find it on my Pinterest (as I don’t have tumblr):   
> https://pin.it/TafCw6J <— (Pinterest.com/metope on the board called “Drawings”) 
> 
> Best,   
> Metope

The Fire Nation might have been the epicentre of industrialisation under Fire Lord Ozai, as the war demanded the perpetual innovation of bigger, better and faster ships and weapons. But it was Republic City where the second wave of industrialisation took place, with record players and then radio stations, telephones, satomobiles, and even the first movers being developed in this area. A lot of it was thanks to Sato Industries. The family-owned company with a large factory on the outer skirts of republic city. As a result, the city was bustling with innovation and technology. Compared to Fire Fountain City, life was faster here, more raw, but also more advanced.

To most people, Republic City represented the epitome of the future therefore, it was the place to be. For Jun, it proved to be hell on earth.

It had been four days now since they had arrived at Air Temple Island. Miyuki and Sora had since gone home, Bumi had a new assignment at the United Forces, Toph had reached her limit of socialisation for the month and had gone back to her swamp - giving Suyin a nonchalant wave goodbye but Lin a tight hug and a whispered ‘see you soon, kiddo’- and Suyin, who couldn’t leave her husband to deal with five children all by himself for much longer, had gone home as well - but not after making Lin promise explicitly that they would keep in touch and would talk more at a later stage.

That had left Lin, Kya and Katara staying at the guest house. And then there was Tenzin and his family of course. He and Lin hadn’t talked a lot anymore since Lin had told him about Jun. Lin would have to reintroduce Tenzin to Jun, but right now all of their attention went to helping Jun to deal with the trauma she had experienced. Adding to the stress the girl was already experiencing by telling her Tenzin was her father would not help.

So Tenzin kept his distance, helping out and stopping by every now and then, but without actively seeking out Jun- and Lin was grateful for that. Especially since Jun’s therapy only seemed to progress ever so slowly.

And then on the fourth day Jun had come teary eyed into the kitchen where Lin and Kya were having a late lunch and with a trembling voice she had asked if Kya could maybe make her better by taking her bending away, because she did not want it anymore.

Lin’s heart broke at seeing her daughter so distressed and worry clamped around her heart upon Jun’s request.

Kya had calmly asked why on earth Jun would want that. And that is when the girl finally opened up. Sobbing that there were só many signals here, coming from the sea. There were voices, noises, buzzing, beeping and it made her head “loud and wild”, as Jun put it. And as she said all this, she pointed in the direction of the large reception tower that stood in the middle of the sea and functioned as the main reception point of all in- and outgoing signals of Republic City. It had been built a couple of years ago to the great dismay of Tenzin, as it somewhat ruined the clear ocean view from the island.

Lin couldn’t believe how she hadn’t thought about that before. Of course Jun would be affected by the presence of a reception tower so close by. Opening her arms invitingly, Jun climbed into her lap and as Lin sat with her back towards the tower, she suddenly had an idea and with the flick of her wrist she bent the metal oven door from its hinges and placed it behind her and Jun - she would put it back later. Bending it in half a circle so that it served as a shield behind them, thus blocking the signals coming from the tower directly behind them, she asked Jun if she sensed a difference.

Jun had sighed that it helped a little bit.

At that Kya had mumbled it was good that they knew now what was bothering Jun so much. They could treat this, would learn Jun how to close off her mind to the signals - much like earth- and waterbenders had to learn to close their mind to their ever present elements as well. It would take away an important element that now kept Jun’s mind preoccupied and would hopefully create the mental space for her to work through the trauma.

So as Kya set to work, Lin spent her days pondering what to do next. The decision to take the position of ambassador had already affected her daughter in so many ways within the first few weeks that she really wasn’t sure what to do about that. At the same time, her daughter was now tied to the avatar family again anyways , as she reconnected with her family and Tenzin would be playing a role in her life too, so either way, their safe and quiet life was over.

On one of those days she had run into Pema. It had been bound to happen at some point, of course. Lin had been quick to say that the acolyte didn’t have to worry that she was trying to steal her husband away from her or anything like that - quite the opposite actually. And to Lin’s surprise Pema had nodded, had said that Tenzin had explained things and even offered that her kids and Jun could have a playdate some time soon to already get to know one another without the context of their familial relation and to take Jun’s mind of everything.

Lin found that she was genuinely grateful for the offered help by Pema. The woman had matured over the years and was not nearly as annoying. They would definitely never become friends, but for the sake of their kids - and Tenzin - it was nice that they would probably be able to be civil.

That was at least one worry less, but still left so many other troubling thoughts at the front of Lin’s mind. And as she saw Jun getting better and better by the day - a combination of Kya’s mindfulness training and the fact that Lin’s mere presence was already reassuring for the girl, according to Katara- the day was nearing that Lin would have to make a decision about her role as ambassador. She had no idea how, though.

The entire matter wasn’t aided when the following morning, Lin got into her first real fight with her daughter. Up until then, there had been the usual disobedience expected of a child and the occasional temper tantrum when she had been a toddler. That morning however, Jun did not want to go with Kya for another session. Kya had mentioned the day before that they were getting closer to breaking through to the core of the Jun’s trauma, something that exhausted the girl and made her emotional- understandably so. 

It thus explained Jun’s reluctance that morning and no matter what Katara, Kya or Lin said, she stubbornly sat down on the floor and refused to get up. Eventually Lin had had enough, she wasn’t going to let a six year old order three adults around. She was the parent here, she knew what was best for her daughter. So resolutely she picked her - immediately squirming and protesting - daughter up from the floor and walked with her to Kya’s office. The entire way Jun yelled and screamed and sobbed, throwing a temper tantrum that Lin remembered well from when she had looked after Su when she was younger.

Pretending it didn’t affect her at all, Lin just continued to walk before putting her down in Kya’s office and sternly telling her that this was for her own good and that she expected Jun to behave now. As Kya entered the room Lin turned around and she closed the door. But not before she heard her daughter furiously shout an “I HATE YOU MAMA!”. She registered Kya reprimanding Jun for her misbehaviour, and Katara saying that she didn’t mean that, that she was just saying it in her youth and anger without realising the actual meaning of the word. But Lin didn’t hear it. All she heard was “I hate you” coming from her daughter. 

..

For the fourth day in a row, Katara saw Lin sitting outside alone, staring out over the ocean. Waves of tension radiating off her. It was the last day before Katara and Kya would start to make their way back home to the South Pole. Time therefore to have a heart to heart with the stubborn Beifong.

“With the joyous news that I have a fourth grandchild, whose mental health has improved considerably, and your reconciliation with your mother and sister well underway, I would think you would be happier than you are, Lin. Care to share what is bothering you so?”

Only by the way Lin clenched her jaw, did Katara get any indication from the younger woman that she even heard what Katara had said as she went to sit next to Lin on the bench.

“I am sorry I lied to you before...about Jun. I just-“ her voice was uncharacteristically quiet as she shook her head and her fingers nervously fidgeting.

“At least you told him eventually. And I can understand why you were hesitant.” Katara offered.

“You do?”

Katara nodded. “You want what is best for your child..even though you can never be entirely sure if what you choose will indeed be that.”

“I worry constantly.” Lin sighed. “I know all mothers do, I think - maybe except for mine. I don’t want to become her - so I worry, and I feel guilty. From the moment she was born I have felt guilty for mistakes I make that affect her.”

Sensing there was more there to the story, Katara offered “Do you want to tell me about it? About your pregnancy and your time with Jun?”

She saw Lin weighing the question before nodding slowly, eyes trained on the horizon in front of them. “The pregnancy was fine. Just regular symptoms like morning sickness and tiredness. But then- in the seventh month it went wrong. And Sora says it is a coincidence, and in theory I know that because I already had contractions that morning before reading the newspaper - I just didn’t recognise them as such. But it was the day I read that - that uncle Sokka had passed away. And I remember it was the first time that I felt regret about leaving and not being able to pay my respects to him. And I didn’t pay attention as I rounded the corner of the street, bumping into some guy with a cart full of cabbages, and that is when I went into labour. Three months too early. And I couldn’t hold Jun for five weeks after she was born. She needed a machine to regulate her temperature and another to regulate her breathing, until she could breathe on her own.”

Katara took a sharp intake of breath as Lin almost mechanically recounted the circumstances around her giving birth. Three months early was a lot. In fact, it was close to a miracle that Jun had made it, Katara thought. For Lin to have gone through that practically alone was definitely not nothing.

“Have you ever talked to someone about this?” Katara asked carefully, and as she already expected Lin shook her head.

“You are actually the first person I am telling. It’s not easy for me to talk about it. I was so scared. And I felt so guilty for not having been able to keep her with me for three more months. And eventually she got better, the only things that reminds me of it now are her asthma and the fact that she is so tiny- and I think she is doing okay. But the guilt never entirely went away..”

“From what you have told me I can assure you there is need to feel guilty. But your friends have probably often told you that already as well.”

Lin nodded. “I just don’t want her to ever feel like I felt. I - I don’t want to give her reason to yell that she hates her mother and one day find that she does mean it.”

Katara closed her eyes at that. Again, it all came down to Lin’s troubled relationship with Toph. The waterbender often wondered lately how she could have let it come this far. They had all seen Lin becoming more distanced as she grew up, and of course they would sometimes tell Toph not to be so hard on her children, but that it ran so deep for Lin, that her self esteem had suffered as much as it did, even now - that Katara hadn’t quite pick up on.

“You are a wonderful mother, Lin.” She whispered as she put her hand on top of Lin’s and softly squeezed it.

“You don’t know that.” Came the clipped response and Katara shook her head in disagreement.

“But I do. I see it in the trust Jun has in you, I see it in her manners, in how at ease and confident she is even despite the recent events. I see it in how you look at her, make sure to compliment her when she is doing something good, and chastise her when she is not, yet never making it personal, always making sure it is a learning moment and not a moment where she can feel criticised anddamaged in her self esteem. You are patient with her, transparent and show her you love her by gestures and by saying it explicitly. You really are a wonderful mother, Lin. I am very proud of you.”

Lin bit down on her lower lip in response as her brows furrowed. “I do everything for Jun.” Lin whispered. “And I always will. She comes first. And that means I should turn down the position as ambassador, even though, deep down, I don’t want to do that. Deep down, my ambition is stronger than the best interest for my child. That doesn’t make me a good mother at all.”

Katara frowned. “Forgive me when I don’t see how one thing has to do with the other.”

“Well, let’s see, I accept a new position in the public eye and within three weeks my child gets kidnapped from the Fire Palace all before I am even officially in office.” Lin responded sarcastically.

“The Red Lotus kidnapped Jun for her subbending, not because of your job.”

“Which they knew about because we went to the Fire Palace.”

“- which they would have heard about at some point anyways.” Katara countered, “as Jun gets older her talents will develop. Word would get out at some point. I don’t say this to scare you - but the reality is that specialised benders will always be of increased interest to certain groups that do not mean well. Your mother had the exact same worries over you when you turned out to be a metalbender, since her academy at the time wasn’t even done yet training it’s first batch of benders. It was just your mother and you, and Toph was terribly worried that someone would try to take you and groom you into “their personal metal bending machine” as she put it.”

Katara watched closely as Lin processed this information, a hint of surprise making her eyebrows raise, before returning into a scowl again and Lin scoffed. “Forgive me if this doesn’t make me feel much better, aunt Katara. If anything it makes me want to bend a bunker into the ground and hide in it with Jun forever.”

Katara sighed. “It is nothing like you to want to avoid a problem. I know you to face your demons head first.”

“Yes, well, I changed.”

“I think you are scared.”

“I think we already established that, yes.” Lin deadpanned.

“Not of Jun. But scared of yourself. Scared to face Republic City and its press again. Doubting if you are good enough.”

Lin slowly blew out slowly as she looked down. “I am afraid that my ambition is clouding my judgement of what is right and what is realistic.” She half confirmed Katara’s guess and the older woman nodded in understanding.

“There is nothing wrong with ambition, Lin. It is healthy. It is something that keeps you motivated, allows you to develop. Being a mother does not mean you can’t be anything other than that. If you want this position and Izumi thinks you are cut out for the job, then there is no reason not to take it. Your daughter will be fine. You can work out a system for Jun, just like you had when you were working in Fire Fountain City. Whatever you choose, you will be a great role model for your daughter. But remember, choose because you think it is the right decision, not because you are afraid to choose the other option and rather play safe.”

They sat in silence after that, as Lin was processing what Katara had just told her and Katara patiently waited for Lin to work her way through it.

Then, Lin nodded slowly. “Thank you aunt Katara.” She muttered and the older woman smiled lovingly at the earthbender. 

“You know, you and Tenzin might not be a couple- but I still see you as my daughter. Don’t hesitate to ever come to me when you have a question or a problem. I am always there for you.” And with those words up in the air, Katara slowed got up again and made her way inside, hoping that she had been able to help Lin with her struggles.

..

Lin had been anxious for her daughter to meet with Tenzin’s children - her brother and sisters. 

For no reason, as it turned out.

The first time they met, Jun showed them a blue flame, they showed her their air scooters and the beginning of a friendship was made. None of them were used to meeting other children with a type of bending that was just a little more special or rare than regular earth- water- or firebending. They seemed to find a friend in one another on that basis.

Jun and Ikki, although almost the same age, were like day and night. Although equally kind and open to the world, Ikki was chattery, a force of energy to be reckoned with. Whereas Jun was calmer, more observing. More like Tenzin’s oldest, Jinora. At nine years old the girl was still young enough to enjoy playing tag, hide and seek or a bending game with two six year olds and a toddler. Yet responsible enough to keep said toddler from harms way.

After the first play date, had come a second and then even a third. Lin watched them with a soft smile as they were currently playing just outside the garden near a tree with a swing on one of the hills- Meelo, the toddler had stayed with Pema today.

Katara and Kya had left the day before, Jun was well on her way back to her old self and Lin had agreed with Tenzin over the phone the day before that they would tell Jun about Tenzin tomorrow. That would leave three more days before Lin and Jun would return to Fire Fountain City to make preparations to move.

The heart to heart with Katara a week ago, and then a long phone conversation with Izumi in the capacity as her closest friends as well as Fire Lord, had led Lin to the conclusion that she would go through with her moving to Republic City to become the new Ambassador of the Fire Nation. Izumi had been quick to say that she would increase security at the Fire Nation residency in Republic City, located just out of the city centre. After going through the practicalities, the phone call then had mainly been about Lin updating Izumi on the events of the past weeks.

Although it started out with Izumi apologising to Lin for not having been able to be there for Lin, as a good friend would be, Lin caught the hint of loneliness and sadness lacing her friend’s words and returned the favour, promising to visit soon - and not just for work. Being Fire Lord in a palace with hundreds of people still was a lonely life- especially after the passing of her husband.

Noticing a new pair of feet approaching the garden Lin got pulled out of her thoughts and looked to her left to see Tenzin approaching. She nodded at him in greeting as they made eye contact. Then looking back to the children, she was just in time to hear Jinora and Ikki cry out in shock as they flew on their gliders above the sea just next to the hill where they had been playing, as Jun catapulted herself off the cliff as well, while simultaneously producing blue flames from her feet. The flames produced enough energy to keep her going upwards into the air for a moment. But then she lost control, and the flames disappeared and Jun started falling.

In a reflex, Lin stamped down her foot on the earth, making a rock on the side of the cliff sticking out in an attempt to catch Jun. Jun was further away from the cliff than eyesight from where Lin was standing showed however, and the rock didn’t reach Jun as she continued to tumble down. For the first time in year she hated that she wasn’t wearing her metal uniform now.

Tenzin who had been walking towards Lin with his back to the garden noticed by the look on Lin’s face and the cries from his children that something was going on and as he started to turn around Lin shouted at the top of her lungs.

“Tenzin!! Jun fell off the cliff, you have to save her!”

Simultaneously Jinora called for her dad as she went after Jun herself with her glider. Tenzin, who was closer to the cliff than Lin, had his glider out in a split second as he jumped off the cliff, while Lin sprinted to the edge herself.

As she watched over the cliff her stomach turned at the height they were at. She saw how Jinora managed to catch Jun only a few meters before she would crash into the sea. The nine year old wasn’t strong enough however to keep herself floating with the extra weight and the girls would have both fallen into the sea if Tenzin hadn’t caught the two of them right in that moment.

In an instant the three of them were back on the cliff again,Ikki landing beside them as well.

Lin had Jun scooped up in her arms as Tenzin let her go. Her daughter didn’t say a word but trembled from head to toe and had wide eyes and a wildly beating heart.

“Jun! Don’t ever do that again! What were you thinking!? You could have been seriously hurt!” Lin exclaimed as she put Jun down again in front of her and put a hand on either of Jun’s shoulders as she looked her daughter in the eye.

“I am sorry.” The girl replied dazed and Lin could see that she hardly needed to tell her daughter to never do this again, as the shock of the fall had scared her daughter to the core and taught her her lesson already. - all of this, while Lin pushed to the back of her mind the fact that some Firebenders were known to indeed fly short distances through the air using this exact technique. They were advanced, adult firebenders however. Not six year olds.

“Jun, I - I am sorry. We shouldn’t have been flying around while you couldn’t.” Jinora now muttered.

Lin smiled encouragingly at the girl. “That is kind of you, Jinora. But Jun should know better. Just because someone else does something does not mean she should do the same.”

Something shifted in Jun’s demeanour at that. Turning so that she could look at Tenzin as well with something akin to a scowl on her face she said, “But I need to fly. Because you fly.” She muttered and pointed at Tenzin. And before either Lin or Tenzin could ask what she meant by that Jun continued. “How come I am not an airbender too, when Jinora and Ikki and Meelo are?”

It was a question Lin did not immediately have an answer to.

“Well,” Tenzin started hesitantly, “I am an airbender, and Jinora, Ikki and Meelo are my children and -“ 

“But you are _my_ dad too.” Jun countered and Lin felt herself pale at her daughter’s words. Tenzin was equally shocked and it wasn’t until Jinora carefully asked what was going on that Lin recovered from her surprise.

“Uh- Jun- kiddo, what makes you say that?” - She tried carefully. They had been so careful around Jun the past days, Lin really did not understand how Jun had come to this conclusion before she had been told.

“You and Tenzin said so on the phone this morning.” And at least her daughter had the decency to look guilty as she said this. Lin had been having the phone call on the other side of the house, there was no way Jun could have heard her.

“You used your bending to listen in on the conversation?” Lin asked and as Jun caught on to how displeased her mother sounded by this news, a deep blush crept up to her cheeks as she stared at her feet and nodded.

“I am sorry mama.”

Pinching the bridge of her nose Lin let out a deep sigh. “We will have a talk about this later young lady.”

“Is what Jun says true? Is daddy also her daddy?” Ikki then piped up.

Spirits, Lin thought, this did not at all go according to plan - as usual..

Thankfully Tenzin jumped in at that moment. Crouching down so that he was on the same level as this kids he looked at all three of them. “To answer your question, Ikki: yes, Jun is your sister - half sister, technically. We had meant to tell you all tomorrow, but it seems Jun here was a little faster.” At the soft smile Tenzin sent Jun, the six year old suddenly got shy, and moved to hide behind Lin’s legs.

Sensing that her daughter needed her support now and that reprimanding her for her behavior would come later, Lin took her daughters hand in hers and gave it a comforting squeeze.

“I am sorry we did not tell you before, Jun” she said, “we wanted to make sure you were feeling better first, before we told you.” Not entirely true, but not entirely a lie either.

Lin wasn’t sure what reaction she had expected to come from Jun, but no reaction at all, safe for hiding behind her mother, hadn’t exactly been one of them. And while Jinora and Ikki fired one question after another at them - ‘how come they didn’t know before this?’, ‘where did Jun and Lin live before?’ ‘Would Jun now come to live with them?’ ‘Why wasn’t she an airbender indeed?’ ‘Why does she have another mother?’ ‘Were they married before?’ - and Tenzin tried to answer the questions as well as he could while staying close to the truth and sometimes purposefully deviating from said truth for the greater good, to Lin’s approval- Jun just stared and listened.

And only when Jinora and Ikki were satisfied, did she move a little closer to Tenzin, a serious expression on her face, that always reminded Lin so much of Tenzin.

“Do you like me?” 

The question took both of them aback and before either of them could answer, Ikki blurt out a “ _I_ like you.” Followed by a stern ssssh from her sister.

“Of course I like you, Jun. I like you a lot.” Tenzin then said genuinely, emphasising his words as to make sure he got through to Jun.

“Even if I am not like them, or you, or mama?” Het voice was barely more than a whisper and Lin cursed inwardly at the fact that even at such a young age, Jun already seemed to have picked up on the way the society in which she was growing up, tended to order and rank life based on the type of bender you were.

“Everyone is special in their own right, Jun. You don’t have to be an airbender or an earthbender or anything else but just yourself for me to like you. You are good just as you are and I am very proud that I have such a talented little firebender as a daughter, just as I am proud of my other children.”

And Lin was so grateful for Tenzin in that moment, as that was exactly the right thing to say judging by the wide smile that appeared on her daughter’s face.

In three quick steps Jun crossed the distance between them and spread her arms wide so that she could give Tenzin a hug. Tentatively and a little surprised, Tenzin responded by wrapping her arms around his daughter as well.

“I am happy that I finally met you, daddy.” The girl sighed and Tenzin responded by wrapping his arms tighter around his daughter. And as he looked up from his daughter to Lin, Lin knew from the sheer emotion in his eyes that she had made the right decision after all to tell the Airhead in front of her. 


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,  
> thanks to all your comments on the previous chapter and sorry for the wait (although it was only a week, so one could argue I am just back to my regular updating schedule ;) ).  
> I figured we could all use a bit of a happier chapter, so that is what I wrote here, while also preparing the plotline for the next chapter that will be even happier (and allows me to bring back some of the crew again :)).  
> Let me know your thoughts and comments on this chapter again, as that is always very much appreciated ;)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

Lin had never really thought about how Jun would react to her father being in her life. It had simply never been a relevant scenario. Surprisingly, now that it had become reality, Lin found that she apparently always had had the implicit assumption that her daughter would be over the moon with her father and would want to spend as much time with him as possible.

And while that was true for Jun’s excitement over her brother and sisters - she and Tenzin had agreed to drop the “half”, seeing as the word gave Lin a bad taste due to her own insistence on the term when things had been bad between her and Suyin - Jun seemed to be a lot less interested in Tenzin.

Tenzin had apologetically said that it was a good thing, that it meant that Lin had made sure that Jun didn’t lack parental love and guidance of any sort in her life so far. But Lin could see that Tenzin was a little disappointed as well, even though he did not show it- least of all to Jun.

She had told him to give it time. Jun had only just turned six, and the understanding of what a father figure could be to her, having grown up without one, was a complicated thing to grasp for a six year old. Lin assured him that he could come over to visit whenever he wanted, to establish some regularity. In fact- now that they had acknowledged Tenzin as Jun’s father, she expected no less than regular visits from him - for Jun’s sake. If he wanted to be a father to her child, he would have to be a committed one. There was no in-between possible in Lin’s book and she was relieved to find out there wasn’t in Tenzin’s book either.

On the day that Lin and Jun would return to Fire Fountain City Jun’s relative lack of interest until then was finally explained: she hadn’t felt any urgency.

“You are not coming with us?” Jun frowned as Tenzin and Pema and their kids came to say goodbye to the two of them in front of Republic City Train station. They would travel by train from Republic City through the Earth Kingdom before taking a boat to Fire Fountain City. The whole journey would take two days. It would probably have been quicker to accept Izumi’s offer to send an airship, but Lin actually somewhat looked forward to showing Jun the Earth Kingdom from the train.

“No kiddo, Tenzin lives here, remember? On the island.” Lin explained calmly while Jun’s green eyes traveled from Tenzin to her mother and back again.

A troubled look entered her gaze. “But...I thought...” she muttered and Lin’s stomach dropped as she realized what her daughter had probably thought.

As she looked up, she saw Tenzin and Pema realized the same and had equal expressions of sympathy on their faces.

“Jun, look,” Tenzin started as he dropped down on one knee so that he was on the same eye level as his daughter. “I am staying here on Air Temple Island with my wife and children, and you are going with your mother. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t have contact until we see each other again. We can have a phone call, and soon you will be moving to the City and then we live much closer by again. Ok?”

“Yeah and then we can play together again, Jun.” Jinora, who was so wise for her age, Lin thought, added sympathetically.

As Lin looked down at her daughter she saw that Jun didn’t like the situation at all, but she was furiously trying to keep her tears at bay.

“We will call Tenzin as soon as we are home, Pebble.” Lin soothed.

“Ok then..” Jun muttered finally before stepping forward and without warning flinging herself at Tenzin who was still crouched down. Tenzin aptly caught his daughter and returned the tight hug she was giving him.

“When I come back I will do a new bending trick.” Jun said with determination once she had let go of Tenzin again.

The airbender chuckled. “I am already looking forward to it.”

The sincerity of his words brought a bright smile on Jun’s face and Lin mouthed a thank you to him, as the airbender got on his feet again.

Just then the large clock in front of the station indicated that the train would be living soon. After having said their goodbyes, Lin and Jun quickly made their way to the train. And once inside Jun almost immediately crawled onto Lin’s lap, snuggling quietly against her mother. And although Lin didn’t like to see her daughter so timid and sad, part of her was also content that at least Jun and Tenzin seemed to had built up more of a bond already than she had initially thought.

She had made the right decision then.

..

Lin hadn’t really spoken to Tadao anymore since they had broken up, now almost two months ago. Shortly after their break-up Lin had gone to the Fire Palace and then things had gone as they went. She therefore didn’t expect him to be there to greet her and Jun as they arrived at the harbor of Fire Fountain City. And he wasn’t. Surprisingly, Lin felt a twinge of disappointment about that. She had hoped that maybe the time away would have normalized things, that they could move towards friendship.

Miyuki and Sora were there however, helping her with getting her bags to the apartment - though they weren’t carrying much, and happily filling her in on the things that had happened back home while she had been gone. Upon her careful question if they had talked to Tadao since they had been back, she saw the two women shot each other a knowing look.

“I am just asking out of curiosity.” She heard herself defending herself.

“Sure..” Miyuki joked, and Lin let an annoyed huff. “Fine, whatever.” She grumbled.

“Lin, we are just teasing.” Sora soothed. “Tadao wanted to be here to say goodbye, but he is away for two weeks visiting family. His mother fell ill. He asked me to give you this.” And she handed Lin a letter at that.

A small smile graced her lips as she accepted the letter from her friend. “Thanks,” and when she saw Miyuki wiggling her eyebrows she rolled her eyes “Oh please, come on. It’s not going to happen - we are done.”

“Didn’t seeing Tenzin help you to get over him?” Miyuki asked and Lin sighed in annoyance. Now that it was all over and done with, she really didn’t feel like going over all of it again. Miyuki and Sora had been there for her through it all, though, so she realized she did owe them some sort of information.

“Tenzin is something of the past.” Lin said matter-of-factly. “It was good to see him again to realize that I do not have feelings for him anymore, nor have I had them in a long time. It was just…the memory of how happy I had once been, I guess.. However, that does not change the fact that I like Tadao, but just simply do not love him. So the bottom line is: I hope to remain friends with Tadao, as we both agreed we would try to be, but we haven’t really had a chance to clear the air yet - and I would really appreciate it if you wouldn’t go all suggestive eyebrow wiggling on me each time he is mentioned, because then it will most certainly never grow into a friendship. And Tenzin will be around because he is Jun’s father. End of story. Alright?”

The two women nodded, wise enough not to push Lin for more information and Lin let it at that as she moved to set the telephone connection up so that Jun could call Tenzin as they had promised.

Next, while she and Miyuki and Sora caught up with the events of the past weeks, Lin listened with one ear to her daughter’s conversation with Tenzin, and a smile crept up her face as she heard Jun recount everything she had seen during their trip through the Earth Kingdom.

The days that followed were filled with packing boxes and saying goodbye to friends and colleagues. She would be leaving for the Fire Palace – again – in a week and a half.

A few days prior to Lin’s arrival, the Fire Nation had made it public that Lin was to be the new ambassador to Republic City. And although she knew it was going to happen, Lin mourned the loss of the last bit of anonymity she had known in Fire Fountain City- as its people now knew who she really was.

It had been Kari, the girl whose parents initially hadn’t wanted her to firebend anymore until Lin had talked to them, who had made Lin aware of the fact that the town _knew_. She had just left her home when she had nearly bumped into Kari.

“Sifu Lin!” The girl had breathed in surprise and upon Lin greeting her in return, she had expected the girl to leave. Instead however, the girl had suddenly pulled her into a hug and let go just as quickly again.

“That’s for helping me with my parents. And also for being an example- I had no idea Master Toph Beifong is your mother. That is really cool!” The girl had beamed, her signature teenage scowl and moodiness momentarily forgotten.

Lin had muttered a perplexed thank you in return, and as she continued her way she had become aware of more people staring, whispering and sometimes even flat out pointing at her.

Now, as Lin was entering the school, it was the head master who came running towards her in much the same fashion as he had six years ago when she first set foot in the school. Although this time, instead of desperation, it was admiration that explained his anxious state.

“I had no idea! _No_ idea!” He exclaimed , “The daughter of the great Toph Beifong, teaching in my school. What an honor.”

Lin had to suppress an eye roll at that. In seven years she had never gotten very close with the man. And though he was formally her boss, she had a hard time seeing him as such. He just didn’t radiate a lot of leadership qualities and the groveling he now did, annoyed her.

“I am still the same Lin, Miko.” She therefore grumbled and her tone of voice seemed to pull Miko back together somewhat.

“Of course.” He nodded. “But still… _Anyways_ , I am glad you returned before taking on your new position. The kids have been asking for you and of course us colleagues would like to say a proper goodbye as well.”

Lin nodded. “Nothing too big, I hope? The past months has been...eventful. I am looking forward to calmer times.”

At that Miko hesitated. “No, no….nothing _too_ big.” He parroted. “How is Jun doing? I heard she fell sick during the trip? - We are sorry to see Jun go as well, she is such a bright and kind girl, and so much firebending potential.” The head master continued rambling and Lin answered all of his politely, while indicating vaguely that Jun had come down with the flu and would be staying home to recover for the next two weeks.

They hadn’t told anyone about what had actually happened to Jun, it seemed better that way. Jun would stay home for the next two weeks before they would be moving to Republic City. Although she had recovered a lot compared to the day Bumi had found her at the North Pole, her daughter still wasn’t entirely her old self. Lin wasn’t sure if going to school might trigger anything, and thus she had agreed with Kya and Katara that she would keep her daughter at home for these last two weeks. Republic City would then be a fresh new start.

In the end, the goodbye Miko had organized for Lin definitely not small, but it wasn’t big either, so technically the head master hadn’t lied. All her colleagues had prepared something with her classes to give or perform for Lin – it was absolute torture for Lin to be the center of this kind of attention, however, she figured that there were many of these situations to come as ambassador, so she should best get used to it.

In the commotion of it all, it wasn’t until nearly a week later that Lin remembered the letter from Tadao that she still hadn’t read yet. Sitting down on the side of her bed, with Jun asleep in the room next to her and the entire house being enveloped in that comfortable silence of a late night, Lin carefully opened the envelope, before unfolding the letter inside and beginning to read.

A smile appeared on her face as Tadao joked that next time she would go swimming in the North Pole, she should call him as he didn’t want to miss out on such adventures. The tone of his letter grew serious again as he expressed his relief up on hearing from Miyuki and Sora that the two of them were alright and that he was sorry that he couldn’t be there now while she was preparing for her definite departure from the town.

_“I know we parted ways on some pretty rocky grounds, but I hope we can fix that and become friends in the future”_

Lin found herself rereading that line several times as warmth spread through her chest and it felt as if an imaginary weight was lifted. She hadn’t quite been aware, in the commotion of everything that had happened recently, how anxious she had actually had been that she might have lost her friend, when their relationship had ended. And now she was happy to read that Tadao seemingly looked at things the same way as she did. He wanted to remain friends as well, and that was a great relief to her. She greatly appreciated his challenging, witty, intelligent but strong-willed character. And she was happy that the universe allowed her to have him around for a little while longer – just not as her partner, and that was fine.

..

The two weeks in Fire Fountain City flew by and before Lin knew it, her belongings and furniture had been loaded into a container, pulled by a satomobile, on their way to Republic City and she and Jun were on a train to the Fire Nation.

Saying goodbye to Sora and Miyuki turned out to be harder than Lin had expected it to be, even with the knowledge that the two had promised to visit soon. But as soon as the Fire Palace loomed in the distance, Lin pushed those emotions to the side. Time to focus on the present now – and on Jun, who had started to squeeze her hand tighter and tighter as they approached the palace.

“It’s okay, Jun.” Lin whispered softly as they now entered through the gates of the palace. It’s just Uncle Zuko and Aunt Izumi again and her kids. They checked the whole palace _twice_ after what happened last time – there is no Red Lotus in this Palace anymore. They are all in jail.”

Jun nodded in response, but her green eyes, filled with anxiety, remained trained on the palace in front of her.

It wasn’t until Iroh came running out of the palace, a bright smile on his young face, that Lin felt Jun’s heartbeat calming down.

“Jun! You have _no_ idea how happy I am to see you!” The boy exclaimed, the calmness and mature posture the 14 year old usually presented to the world momentarily forgotten as his relief over seeing Jun again. Lin had heard that Iroh had been blaming himself in the days after the kidnapping about what had happened. So she was glad to see that the boy seemed in better spirits now.

Jun let go of Lin’s hand in an instant before running up to Iroh and wrapping her hands around his legs in a fierce hug. “I missed you, Iroh.” She sighed.

“I missed you too, little one.” Iroh answered. “I heard you had quite the adventure.”

At that Jun let go and nodded seriously. “It was really scary. But I got saved _and I met my daddy_.” Jun’s eyes lit up as she said this and Iroh laughed. “I heard about that too.” Looking up the boy now gave a short bow to Lin. “Hello aunt Lin. I am happy to see you are back.”

Lin returned the greeting of her own. “Happy to see you too, kid.” She replied before the three of them started walking back towards the palace.

Alright, Lin thought. Time for a new beginning, preferably one that was going to be smooth, predictable and calm.

But as soon as she entered the palace, a loud “SURPRISE!” filled her ears, causing her heart to skip a beat and Jun to shriek in shock. So much for a smooth and calm new beginning then..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also - what do you think? Will Lin and Tadao manage to become friends or will things get messy (not dramatic messy but like, friends- or a little more than friends but with no strings attached as long as they're both single anyways) ? (I am definitely not making Lin with Tadao endgame or anything - but I figured that doesn't mean I can't have a little bit of fun writing about them here and there in the meantime. You know, like things are messy in real life sometimes too ;))


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> Thanks for all of you who commented on the last chapter, it is much appreciated ^^! - This chapter is a happier chapter again (am giving all of us a little break before I have some more DRAMA planned ;-) ). I put a few Lin-Jun and Lin-Jinora scenes in here. The bonding of the latter serves a specific purpose for later, and I hope you like the way I wrote the interaction between the two.  
> As always: comments and feedback are much appreciated as they help me to be/stay motivated :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope

“Bet you didn’t see that one coming, Linny!”

She cringed at the nickname.

“Look at her face, I told you she wouldn’t appreciate this.” Kya cackled.

She didn’t and to make matters worse, the trembling little hand in her own told her Jun hadn’t either. “Why did they do that, mama?” Her brows frowned and her nose scrunched up in disturbance.

“Because most people like surprises, Jun. They did it because they thought we would like it.” Lin explained, keeping herself from giving the cynical answer she wanted to give- there was plenty of time for her daughter to turn cynical because of the world, without her help.

“Jun! Come! We can play!” That was Ikki, running up to Jun from in between the legs of the adults and taking the girl’s hands in hers.

Jun looked questioningly at her mother.

“If you want to go, you are free to go. Just don’t go too far into the palace exploring.” Lin answered her daughter’s unspoken question and at that the girl happily skipped after her friend. At least her anxiety over the palace was forgotten for now, Lin thought.

“I am sorry, aunt Lin.” Iroh’s apologetic voice pulled her out of her thoughts again.

“No worries, kiddo. I take it you were as much a pawn in this whole idea as your mother?” - there was no way Izumi had come up with this idea on her own.

Iroh chuckled and nodded in confirmation.

“Well, are you going to stand there all evening? This will be a boring birthday then!” Kya now called to Lin and with a sigh, Lin approached the group of people.

“Hi Kya, you really didn’t have to do this. _Really didn’t.”_

The waterbender just smiled with glee. “I know. But Su and I weren’t going to let your birthday pass this year, after we had to do so for the past seven.”

“I don’t see what’s to celebrate about 43.” Lin replied moodily.

“The fact that you can still turn it around and appear younger. I’m just getting a decade older when I do that.” Kya joked.

“Move over sis, I want to congratulate Lin too.” Bumi’s voice boomed and pushing his sister to the side he pulled Lin into a hug before she could dodge his arms.

“Bumi please let me go again!” Lin demanded, but she couldn’t entirely hide the amusement in her voice as she said so.

“Hi Lin!” Suyin’s eager voice then sounded, and Lin noticed a slightly nervous trembling in it as well. “I hope you are not mad. It is just that we wanted to do something nice for you, after… _everything_ and we are just so happy to have you back you know, and-“

“Su,” Lin interrupted her sister’s rambling and her annoyance ebbed away a little as she saw how anxious her sister was about Lin’s reaction. “It’s alright Su. I appreciate the gesture.”

“Oh, good.” Suyin sighed, her shoulders lowering somewhat in relief.

“I do am curious how you managed to get Izumi here on board with this.” Lin added, turning to include Izumi who was standing a little behind Suyin in the conversation.

“Why, whatever makes you think I would need to be managed to be on board?” Izumi replied in a mocking tone.

Lin chuckled. “At least, if you are hosting, I know things won’t get too crazy.”

“And that’s why I offered for it to be here instead of in Zaofu.” Izumi quipped, causing Su to call out “hey!” In mock-indignation.

“In any case,” Izumi continued unfazed,” you should know that tonight we celebrate over dinner with the crew, but tomorrow I am throwing you a formal birthday party for a small group of people. Just some ambassadors and other friends and acquaintances who it would be good to already know before you go to Republic City. - nothing too formal” she added hastily when she saw Lin pull a face. “They’re all incredibly nice and also good fun for throwing a party with.” Izumi said with a glint in her eyes.

“Honestly, Izumi, why on earth would you throw this on me like this?” Lin countered unamused. “I just spent half a day on a train. I am tired and dusty. I just wanted a quiet dinner, sleep and calmly start tomorrow. Instead of having a dinner that will have way too much alcohol involved and then having to do the whole thing again tomorrow but with people I don’t know.”

“I know, dear.” Izumi now said apologetically. “But two things. One, if I would have told you in advance, you would have died of nervousness of having to socialize without true purpose yet the entire evening. – _don’t_ give me that look, you know it’s true. Now, you can’t overthink it too long and you have your family with you. And secondly, if you get to Republic City, the press is going to be all over you. You need to have a network already before then, a network that can help you out if necessary. And with a network I don’t mean Tenzin, because as much as I like him, he is not the kind of spin doctor you might need. And tomorrow was the only night available to organize this in the palace.”

Lin huffed in annoyance. “Well I still think that –“

The clearing of a throat caused the conversation to halt, as Lin saw Tenzin awkwardly approaching the three.

“I’ll go see if anyone has a drink yet. Izumi, Lets’ go!” Su said quickly and before Lin could say another thing the two women disappeared in an instant.

“Happy birthday, Lin.” Tenzin said warmly and despite her irritation over Izumi’s stunt, Lin found herself returning the smile he gave her.

“ _Now_ I know what that trip was all about Jun mentioned you were making. You’re here with Pema and the kids?”

“No, just me and Jinora and Ikki. Pema stayed home with Meelo. He is a little too young for this still. But for Jinora and Ikki it is nice. Su also brought Opal and the twins to play with.”

And as Lin’s eyes traveled to the direction in which Jun had gone, she saw her daughter animatedly talking to a girl slightly older in age and two identical boys playing by keeping a stone up in the air with Jinora and Ikki. The boys doing so through earthbending, the girls through airbending.

“It is also nice for Jun to have another chance to get to know them better.” Lin nodded, unsure what else to say.

Tenzin nodded. “I hope you don’t mind my being here..” he then added and a look of insecurity crossed his face.

“Why would I be?” Lin asked in genuine surprise. “Like I said it is nice for Jun and -“

“Yes for Jun,” he interrupted her, “but for you I mean. Because...You know.. I feel the need to apologize to you every time I see you and it still won’t be enough.”

Lin sighed. How could this man still have _such_ a poor timing with bringing these kinds of things up. “Look, Tenzin. Everything that happened brought me Jun, for which I am happy. But tomorrow Izumi has decided to throw me some formal dinner I didn’t prepare for tomorrow and it is my birthday today, which I wasn’t going to celebrate, but now that we do, I want it to be a nice evening. So if you want, we can definitely have another conversation about our past, although I really can’t see what good it will do. But please not tonight. Let’s all just enjoy ourselves tonight and try to survive.” And to emphasize her words Lin took a glass of champagne from the waiter that just passed her and took a big swig from it as she turned her back to Tenzin, desperately in search for someone else to talk to.

Just then it was announced that dinner was ready and Lin gratefully went to collect Jun and enter the dining room.

In the end Lin found herself to quite enjoy the dinner and she was happy to see Jun enjoyed herself as well.

As usual, Suyin, Kya and Bumi did most of the talking, with Izumi laughing along, Tenzin being on the receiving end of most of the jokes and Lin just observing it all. Just like old times, before everything had become difficult and ugly, Lin thought.

Before she could slip away in darker thoughts, Kya was suddenly ticking her knife against her glass to ask for attention and Izumi had stood up from her chair with a glass in her hand.

“Dear friends, let me start by saying that I know, Lin, that you hate speeches when they’re about you, so I will keep it short.” The table chuckled and Lin just gave a short shrug in response.

“But allow me to say, that I am so, genuinely happy, Lin, that we are celebrating your birthday tonight. That you are here with us, in good health, and you didn’t return alone, you even brought this wonderful little girl with you. And I wish the two of you all the best as you start your new chapter in Republic City. To Lin!

At that glasses were raised.

“Ah, Mama you are turning all red!” Jun giggled.

“Oh hush, Jun.” Lin said softly and she tried to give her daughter a stern look but failed as everyone burst out in laughter and she saw the mischievous look in her daughters eyes. That hadn’t been there in a very long time.

The rest of the evening was spent in comfortable chatter. There seemed to be an unspoken agreement at the table that controversial topics were to be avoided. A good recipe too, as it turned out, for Lin to learn that her sister really had changed. She had become more mature, more empathetic and a good mother at that too- as she maintained the right balance between letting her children play, and ensuring they behave.

With the twins – cheered on by Tenzin’s youngest daughter – that proved to be a bigger challenge than with Opal. She, Jinora, Jun and Izumi’s daughter had been quietly playing all night in the children’s room adjacent to the dining room, while Ikki and the twins occasionally came whirling into the dining room for attention and hoping to steal some food from the adults’ table. The grass was always greener..

That evening, when dinner was over and they were back in their room where Lin was brushing Jun’s hair, a thing that had become somewhat of a ritual between the two, Lin gently asked if Jun had had a good time that evening.

The girl nodded. “My cousins are nice. And I like Jinora a lot.” She sighed. “It think it will be really nice to have a big sister too.”

“I am happy for you, little Pebble.” Lin pressed a kiss in her daughters hair.

“I hope Jinora also likes being a big sister.” Jun went on. “Do you like being a big sister, mama? Aunt Suyin never visited before..”

The question was asked innocently, but Lin felt a pang of guilt nonetheless. “That is...that is because your aunt Suyin and I had a very big argument once, and we refused to say we were sorry... that is why you always have to say sorry, Jun. Don’t make the same mistakes we made.”

Turning, Jun now looked at her mother with worried eyes. “I didn’t mean to make you sad...”

Mustering a smile, Lin shook her head. “You didn’t, kiddo - and I am sure Jinora loves being a big sister to you.”

“I really hope so.” Jun sighed contently.

After Lin had put Jun to bed and Lin had returned to the modest ensuite, she heard a soft knocking on the door.

Opening the door, she found Jinora standing on the other side, a hint of nervousness in her eyes as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other and back again.

“Aunt Lin..” she started, and Lin had to admit that she still had to get used to the title being used by anyone else than Izumi’s kids. “Dad asked me to give you this. He would have come himself but Ikki is being... _Ikki_.. so he needs to stay with her.” The girl said with a slight roll of her eyes as she mentioned her sister, before holding an envelope out to Lin.

Lin wordlessly took the envelope from her and instantly recognized Katara’s handwriting on it.

“Thank you, Jinora.” She said, “Was there something else?” She then added on instinct upon seeing the troubled look in the girl’s eyes.

Jinora’s eyes widened a little at the question before looking away, Lin waited patiently as she saw the ten year old weighing whether to share with Lin whatever it was that bothered her. “It’s nothing...just that my dress for tomorrow got ripped by Ikki. That is why dad couldn’t come, he is talking to Ikki. He told me to see if aunt Kya can mend it. But she is still out somewhere in the palace and I don’t want to bother aunt Izumi with it. So, uhm, I will just wait until tomorrow and see if aunt Kya has time. Nothing to bother you with.” They were the most words Lin had ever heard the girl speak in one go. She was clearly upset about this.

“Well..” Lin offered hesitantly, “if you want, I could take a look at it? Jun just went to sleep so I have time. And I have mended a lot of Jun’s clothes in the past.”

“Really?” Jinora perked up, relief on her face.

“I am probably not as good as your aunt or your mother though..” Lin said cautiously but Jinora was already halfway down the hall, helped by her airbending.

“I’ll be back with the dress in a bit! Thank you aunt Lin!” She called out happily.

Now let’s hope that she could actually keep true to her word… Lin wasn’t quite sure she suddenly felt a little nervous opposite the ten year old, but she was. Anxious to ensure that the girl, Jun’s half-sister, would like her and wouldn’t turn away from her like most children would. Despite being a mother to Jun and having been a teacher and counselor, she still felt somewhat awkward interacting with children she did not really know. Especially if those children were Tenzin’s children. Jun had been positive about Pema up until now, and she would be damned if she would give Pema’s children any reason to not be equally positive about her.

Jinora was back in mere minutes. “I let dad know where I was. He said something about two left hands or something, but I didn’t really get that.”

Lin huffed at that.

“Anyways,” Jinora continued. “here is the dress. And _here_ now is a huge tear because Ikki can never be just content with her own things” The airbender’s frustration was clearly audible in her voice and it made Lin chuckle.

“Little sisters can be challenging sometimes, can’t they?” And she chuckled again when Jinora nodded vigorously.

“I just don’t understand why she can’t just be calm and think things through first. Like me – or like _Jun_.” Jinora added. “How can both of them be my sister and be so different."

As Lin went to sit down in a chair after having grabbed a sewing kit from her suitcase she looked up at Jinora with kind eyes. “It is nice of you to have accepted Jun as your sister so quickly, Jinora.” She complimented and she saw the ten year old blush a little as she sat down on the edge of the chair opposite of Lin.

“Well, she _is_ my sister. And…And I don’t really understand, and daddy doesn’t really explain it. But if Jun is my sister, then she is family and that is what counts.” Jinora said firmly. “Just like you, you are family now too, aunt Lin. Not like aunt Su, but like aunt Kya.”

Lin felt her heart warm at the young girl’s words. “That is very kind of you to say, Jinora. Thank you.” She smiled.

They sat in silence for a while as Lin worked on sewing the orange and yellow dress back together again.

“Aunt Lin,” Jinora then started, “Could _you_ maybe explain? – when I was in school last week, kids said that Jun wasn’t my sister and that my dad had been unfaithful. But I don’t really understand what that means. Mom just said that I shouldn’t pay attention and that they probably didn’t know what they were saying either. But she wouldn’t explain..”

Lin stilled her movements at Jinora’s confession. The rumors had already started then. Slowly looking up from her hands she saw the genuine confusion and hunger for an explanation in Jinora’s eyes. The young airbender wasn’t asking for sensation or just to joke around. She really wanted to know. And although ten years was still very young, Jinora seemed much older than her years already.

“Before your father met your mother, your father and I were… _together_. Boyfriend and girlfriend, if you will.” Lin started, adapting her speech to wording Jinora would understand. “Then, for many reasons that you are still too young to understand, we broke up, and your father met your mother and they got married. Your parents love each other, and they love you and your sister and brother a lot. _That_ , is all you need to know and remember about your father and my past.

As for the kids in your school. I imagine, in the upcoming weeks, especially once Jun joins you at the school, you will hear more of these things, as people like to talk. These things are tied to matters that you are still too young to understand, and I should not be the one telling you about this, that is something for your father to do. He will tell you when you are old enough. But the important thing for now is that you should heed your mother’s advice not to pay attention to whatever the kids in school say. You and I know the truth about the kind of man your father is. A kind man, and a good father and that is what counts. Jun is as much his daughter as you and Ikki are, and that is why I was so proud of you just now when you explained why it is only logical to you to see Jun as your sister. You three girls will have to stick together and look out for one another a little in the upcoming weeks. Do you understand what I am saying?” Lin asked, her tone not unkind but serious as she looked at Jinora.

She saw understanding and determination settling in the girl’s grey eyes, before she gave a short nod. “I understand, aunt Lin. I will protect Jun.”

At that Lin smiled, before handing the dress back to Jinora again. “Here you go. – You are a clever girl Jinora, thank you for looking after Jun. But don’t forget to let your sisters look after you as well every now and then. They might just be _little_ sisters, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t have your back.”

At that Jinora nodded while taking the dress from Lin. “Thank you, aunt Lin.” She smiled before stifling a yawn.

“Looks like it is time for bed for you too.” Lin said softly. As the two got up, Jinora suddenly moved to wrap her arms around Lin’s waist, giving her a firm hug before letting go again. “Thanks a lot, aunt Lin.” She beamed with genuine appreciation in her eyes.

“You’re welcome, kid.” Lin smiled. “Now, offyou go.” Lin said gently, accompanying Jinora to the door and watching her as the girl skipped through the hallway back to her own room, giving a wave goodbye to the earthbender just before she rounded the corner.

With a smile, Lin closed the door to her room again. As she turned, her eye fell on the letter Jinora had delivered.

Time to see what aunt Katara wanted.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> Two chapters in one week! - as a little Thanksgiving present, if you will ;).   
> I really enjoyed writing this chapter, and I hope you will like it too.   
> This is probably the last chapter completely void of angst, because next chapter will be Republic City, and I'll leave you with a nice cliffhanger then, just so you know already :-).  
> Very curious to hear your thoughts about this one, I especially enjoyed writing a socially awkward Tenzin here :).  
> Best,  
> Metope

The following day started slow, but Lin felt her mood sour as she watched the palace staff preparing the palace for the party that evening. A _small_ party, Izumi had said. But judging by the number of glasses that were being placed at the buffet and the entire stage they were building on one side of the ballroom, Lin started to doubt the truth of those words.

She spent most of her day in her room therefore, while Jun was out playing with her cousins. Only going down right before dinner. She still felt moody, and the scowl that had settled on her face that morning hadn’t left yet.

“Oh wow, I thought you would maybe hate the surprise part, but then like the rest of it. But that scowl tells me otherwise.”

Lin turned around at the familiar voice and her eyebrows raised in surprise as she saw Sora approaching her, with Miyuki not far behind.

“Wh-“

“We took the same train as you did, but stayed in a hotel nearby. I am actually quite proud you didn’t notice us, madam Detective.” Miyuki beamed to which Lin replied a somewhat sour “I am not a detective.” Before sending them a yielding smile. “But I am happy that you are here.”

And she meant it. Miyuki and Sora gave her a sense of balance and footing whenever she felt her family was threatening to swallow her into their toxic and overwhelming dynamics again.

“We have a surprise too.” Miyuki blurted out, earning her an eye roll from Sora.” Woe is the unfortunate soul who trusts you with their secret.”

“ _Hey_ , I kept Lin’s secret, didn’t I?”

And Lin chuckled, “You miss my birthday and you are going to fight?”

With a huff Miyuki turned away from Sora and looked at Lin directly. “ _No_.” She said determinately. “Instead, we are here to celebrate. A day late, but that was due to the surprise, you’ll see. - You know, if you want you can borrow something from me to change into, because I take it this is not what you are going to wear?” She then added, looking Lin over.

“I wasn’t exactly expecting to walk into a formal birthday party after travelling.” Lin replied dryly. “I haven’t actually given it any thought yet.”

“I know! Typically you not to think of such things two hours before the party. But that is why I brought extra clothes, since yours are all packed! We are about the same size.” Miyuki beamed.

Lin frowned. “I don’t think your dresses will suit me Miyuki.”

“Oh come one, Lin. It’s your party, take advantage of the whole occasion.” Sora pushed with a smirk.

“ _You_ just want to see me in one of those dresses for your own amusement.” Lin pointed at Sora, narrowing her eyes.

The waterbender shrugged. “What can I say... Isn’t a party meant for amusement?”

“Fine..” Lin sighed. “But first lets have dinner.”

Ignoring Miyuki’s squealed ‘ _yes_!’ Lin turned around to find Jun and take her to the dining room.

Half an hour after dinner had ended Lin emerged from her room again with an awkward look in her eyes. “I really don’t feel comfortable, Miyuki. Don’t you have pants? Or something with shoulders?” She murmured as she plucked at the dress Miyuki had made her wear.

The sleeveless dress had a high boat neckline that ended at her shoulders. The body was relatively tight fitting and as such accentuated both her toned arms and waist. The skirt was straight and long with a moderate split on the right. The fabric was a deep emerald green color with a gracious bordeaux red swirly pattern embroidered at the neckline and around the waistband.

Her hair was pinned back on one side, while the other side nicely framed her face - and conveniently hid her scars somewhat. Light red eye shadow accentuated her green eyes, complimented by painted red lips. In her ears she wore green earrings.

“You look absolutely gorgeous, Lin.” Sora said encouragingly.

“I never said that I didn’t think I looked _good_. I just hate wearing a dress like this and feeling so exposed.” Lin almost snapped.

“Whoa, Lin, what is going on?” Sora frowned as she approached her friends.

Lin shrugged before looking away to the window. “Sorry, I am just tensed. I don’t like that this was all organized on such short notice. “

“You know, as ambassador there will probably be a lot more of these occasions.” Sora said carefully and Lin sighed.

“I know. But I will not be the kind of ambassador who enjoys these occasions. Izumi knew that when she appointed me. “

Sora nodded. “Maybe try to see tonight as a trial version then..”

Lin nodded. “Yes..” she spoke halfheartedly. “Do you know where Jun is? I should probably see what I can give her to wear.”

“That’s all taken care of as well.” Miyuki said triumphantly. “Izumi said she could wear one of her daughter’s dresses from when she was that age. She is helping her with it right now.”

“Ah…alright...” Lin swallowed. “I feel bad not having thought of that sooner. I was so focused on my own discomfort with the whole thing...”

“That’s only understandable, Lin. That is why we are all here. To help you.” Sora said encouragingly.

“Now, I think it is time for us to go downstairs. The first guests will be arriving soon.” Miyuki said.

“You two go. I’ll follow soon, I just need a minute.” Lin said and the two women nodded in understanding before leaving the room.

Breathing in deeply through her nose before exhaling slowly between her lips, Lin tried to ground herself. Involuntarily her eyes traveled to Katara’s letter again, lying on the table next to her bed.

She knew its contents by heart now.

“ _Dear Lin,_

 _I am writing this letter on behalf of your mother, who wanted to make sure to wish you a happy birthday.”_ Its first sentence said. It was definitely not what Lin had expected when she had started reading.

“ _Toph is currently visiting the South Pole. That probably surprises you as much as it surprised me, after all those years that she stayed just in her swamp. She is still looking for ‘enlightenment’, but I think she has come to realize that she might not necessarily find that in the swamp. We talk a lot._

_I see it as a sign that something has changed since your time at Air Temple Island and I hope you will see that too._

_Either way, your mother wishes you a very happy birthday- as do I, of course. She also insisted on adding that you shouldn’t be too hard on Kya and Suyin - or, Sugar Princess and the Rebel as she put it - for organizing you a birthday party. They mean well._

_Enclosed you also find a present. It is a necklace that once belonged to your grandmother. Toph never wore it because “what would good would jewelry do her if she can’t see for herself if it is actually pretty”, but after I ensured her it is quite beautiful, she decided it should be yours._

_We are both incredibly proud of you, Lin._

_Happy birthday, dear._

_Love,_

_Katara and Toph”_

Lin’s hand subconsciously traveled up to where the pendant of the necklace was now resting just below her collarbones. An emerald green stone, dark of color, surround by a subtle golden frame to attach it to the chain.

The gift and letter made the tiny seed of hope that her mother was really trying to change grow a little bit again.

The door then opened and Jun came jumping into the room, dressed in a beautiful red dress with golden details. Her long black hair was pulled back into a braided bun on the back of her head. Jun stopped in her tracks as she saw her mother, eyes widening and mouth falling open.

“Wow, mama you look like a _princess_!” She admired as she approached her mother and softly touched the velvet fabric of Lin’s dress.

Lin chuckled. “If I am, then you most certainly are a queen, Pebble. You look gorgeous, are you happy with your dress?”

At that Jun nodded. “It waves when I move, look!” Jun beamed and Lin watched her daughter twirl in delight as the light fabric of her dress graciously floated along.

“Looks like we are both ready for the party, then. Let’s go.” Lin said gently, before nudging her daughter in the direction of the door. Jun happily skipped downstairs as Lin followed. Her eyes following her daughter and smiling at her excitement. Every day Jun became more like her old self again.

“Wow aunt Lin, you look really _pretty_!” Ikki exclaimed as soon as she saw her aunt. “And you too, Jun!”

“I like your dress too Ikki.” Jun smiled.

“Thank you! It isn’t a dress actually, but wide pants. Look, now I can still airbend without my dress going everywhere, isn’t that great?” The six year old rambled and she demonstrated her words by propelling herself up before floating down again while Jun laughed in excitement.

Seeing that the new governess had already arrived to keep an eye on the children, Lin gave her daughter a kiss in her hair before joining the other adults in the ballroom. Izumi had assured her that they thoroughly vetted the governess this time, and she was completely clean, so felt Lin felt comfortable leaving Jun in her care along with all the other children.

“Oh, Lin! You’re beautiful!” Suyin gushed as soon as she saw her sister.

“You sound so surprised..” Lin commented dryly as she took a glass of champagne from a platter nearby.

“Well, the number of times you wore a dress can be counted on one hand.” Suyin countered.

“Really?” Miyuki now asked in genuine surprise. “I have seen Lin wearing dresses before. More practically ones, most certainly. But she wears one every now and then.”

It caused her to receive surprised and somewhat confused looks from Suyin and Kya.

“Really...well, what do you know?” Kya muttered, in the awkward silence that followed.

“Yes, well, as detective it wasn’t very useful to wear dresses, but as teacher it was just fine.” Lin said curtly, before an uncomfortable silence descended between the women again.

“Ah, there are the first guests.” Izumi said and relief was audible in her voice that she had a reason to get out of the conversation – or lack thereof. “Lin, let’s go.” And she pulled Lin with her by the arm as she moved to greet them.

The evening progressed alright after that. Izumi had invited around thirty guests and introduced Lin to all of them. Some were just friends of Izumi’s who lived in Republic City, but there was also the Fire Nation Councilwoman of Republic City and her wife - really nice people - the former ambassador to the Fire Nation and his wife - a little dull, Lin could see how he hadn’t been able to advance the Fire Nation’s interests effectively until then - and there was the owner of SatoIndustries - she didn’t like him much, he gave her an uneasy feeling.

Lin had feared the people she would meet today would judge her, being who she was, the daughter of Toph, an earthbender, a single mother, not to mention the fact that it has already leaked that Tenzin was Jun’s father - Lin was quite sure some arrogant air acolyte had purposefully dropped that to spite them.

But she couldn’t be more wrong. For these people, all close friends of or belonging to the Fire Nation, it counted that they were represented by someone cut out for the job, and apparently they all thought that Lin was that person. Besides, they focused on the other half of her parentage, which she knew little about, but which made her just as much part of the Fire Nation as she was part of the Earth Kingdom. It sure helped that her daughter was in fact a firebender too.

Every now and then, Lin cast an eye on the adjacent room where the kids were having their “kids ball” accompanied by the modest classical music a little orchestra on the stage in the ballroom was playing.

“And, are you enjoying yourself?” Sora asked as she showed up next to Lin, the two of them overlooking the ballroom.

Lin gave a tentative nod. “I think so. It is not as bad as I thought it would be.”

“Good.” Sora nodded. “Don’t you want to dance though?”

Lin shook her head at that. “I’m not quite feeling like it. Besides, classical dances have never been my strongest suit- and who would I dance with? I am _definitely_ not going to dance with Tenzin, if that is what you were thinking.”

“Spirits no.” Sora said quickly, before a smirk played on her lips. “Just you wait, your surprise will be there soon.”

“Oh my..” Lin mumbled unamused, she had forgotten about the whole surprise altogether up until then. As Sora walked away again, Lin made her way to Suyin and Kya who were standing in the back of the ballroom.

“Do you know what this secret Sora and Miyuki are going on about is?” She asked directly.

Kya laughed. “I have honestly no idea, Lin. But it better be good, because I don’t want to be on the receiving end of your wrath if it isn’t, judging by the look you are giving me now.”

At that Lin relaxed a little, unclenching her jaw. “I am sorry, I just don’t like -“

“-surprises. We know, Lin.” Suyin finished. “That’s why our surprise was yesterday, when it was just all of us. I don’t know what your friends have planned either.” She said apologetically.

Lin nodded as she exhaled slowly. “Alright. I just hope that -“

At that moment the violin waltz that had been playing abruptly stopped, and Lin’s eyes widened upon hearing the tunes of a jazzy song, started accompanied by a familiar voice saying “Good night ladies and gentlemen.”

..

Suyin watched Lin’s eyes widen as the music suddenly changed from the - in her opinion terribly boring - classical piece to an upbeat jazz song and a male voice with a deep bass in it started speaking.

“That can’t be...” her sister whispered and as the man finished speaking by announcing it was time for some more upbeat music and started playing, Lin wordlessly turned around, making her way through the people with an urgency that made Suyin frown.

She only had to cast one look at Kya to see that the waterbender was just as confused and together they quickly followed Lin to the front of the room.

Lin had come to a halt in the middle of the ballroom staring at the stage where a tall man in Fire Nation tuxedo was casually singing, a smirk on his lips and his eyes, holding a mischievous glint in them, trained on Lin.

Looking at her sister, Su saw Lin’s face was a mixture between surprise and amusement, her lips slightly parted with the corners of her mouth turned upwards slightly.

“Who is that man?” Kya whispered in her ear and Su shrugged.

Just then Jun came running from the adjacent room, dodging the arms of the governess who tried to keep her from entering the hall.

“Mama it is Tadao!” She called out to Lin, cheeks red with excitement. Her daughter’s voice seemed to break whatever spell Lin had been under as she turned to look at Jun, a bright smile on her face as she confirmed her daughter’s words.

“Well, our surprise is a success, I think.” Su heard a content voice say next to her and she turned to see Miyuki and Sora standing next to them. “You arranged this?” She asked somewhat superfluously and the two women nodded.

“There is history there, am I right?” Kya asked with a smirk and Miyuki nodded excitedly.

“They were together - now they are just friends. Or so they say... but we thought, maybe now that Lin has worked through some things of her past, she can finally move on and we could help a little. Besides, they haven’t seen each other in months.” Miyuki explained excitedly.

Su gasped in surprise. She was suddenly reminded again that even though a lot of things felt the same and familiar with Lin, there had indeed been seven years in between their reunion. And there were clearly also a lot of things she did _not_ know.

“Mama can we dance?” Jun chirped and she heard Lin answering that this was maybe not the moment to do so as they were standing in the ballroom while most other guests weren’t quite sure what to do with this new type of music. The guest didn’t seem to disapprove of the new, more modern music, but they weren’t quite sure how to behave either. Thus, everyone was just watching the band. Starting to dance now would mean being the center of attention and that was just not something Lin was comfortable with. Not _everything_ had changed after all.

Kya beside her snorted. “Yeah, good luck, Jun. Lin doesn’t dance.”

“ _Yes_ she does.” Miyuki countered with a confused frown.

“And she is quite good at it too.” Sora added.

Kya looked up in surprise. “Oh...okay?” Again, Su felt the same awkwardness as she had felt earlier that evening when she had said Lin never wore dresses and the two women had challenged that statement as well. It seemed as if they had come to know a completely different person than the sister she knew.

“Ah, the little miss Beifong has an excellent idea!” The man, called Tadao apparently, now said through the microphone as he winked at Jun. “Time to dance! Come on everyone!”

And at that he stepped away from the microphone, while the rest of the band continued to play and jumped off the stage, making his way to Lin. Lin, knowing what Tadao was getting at, started to shake her head. “No, Tadao, definitely not.” She said determinedly.

“Oh come on, one dance?” He laughed but Lin shook her head.

“I am not dancing with all these people staring at us.” She hissed.

Suyin got distracted when someone suddenly held an outstretched hand in front of her. “Come on, Su. I think we have to help Linny a little.” It was Bumi, who clearly was much less shocked and confused by the whole situation and much more amused. “Let’s dance.” He clarified.

“Yes! Let’s all dance!” Miyuki said excitedly as she pulled Sora with her.

Su frowned. “Do you know how to dance?, Bumi?”

“Do I know how to _dance_!?” He called out in mock indignation. “Of course I do, we all learn how to do so in the UF. I can even do a foxtrot, so come on!” And before Su could say anything else, he pulled her with him and they fell into a jazzy foxtrot.

Now more guests followed as well, and it seemed to be just what was needed for Lin to be convinced by Tadao, as they too now joined hands and fell in line with the rhythm of the music. All the while, the governess had managed to collect Jun again, who was now happily dancing on the tunes, holding hands with her cousins, the sight was adorable.

Nearly just as adorable as her sister.

“Have you seen them!? Just as you think you have seen everything!” Kya called excitedly to Su as she passed them, while she was dancing with brother. Su nearly burst out in laughter as she watched Kya practically _pushing_ Tenzin through the dance, while the airbender stumbled and struggled and looked completely out of his element. For an airbender he was not exactly quick on his feet when it came to dancing.

But Kya was right, Su was astounded by her sister, her rigid, serious, no nonsense sister, dancing in sync with this man - this _good_ _looking_ man – hitting all the moves, rhythmically swaying and hopping. But what took Suyin back even more was the light and calm look in Lin’s eyes. Her green eyes were filled with joy as she conversed with Tadao while dancing, an almost permanent smile on her face. Su couldn’t remember the last time she had seen Lin like this- wasn’t even sure if she had _ever_ seen Lin like this.

And for the first time, Suyin saw how Lin’s disappearance might indeed have been a blessing for her. She wasn’t so very sure if her sister would have been celebrating her 43rd birthday with such joy if she had stayed..

..

Kya sighed as she sat down on a chair against one of the walls of the ballroom. She had danced four songs, quickly stealing Bumi away from Su after that first dramatic song with Tenzin. It was getting late now and all the external guests had left already.

Tired, she had let Bumi go back to Su who still had energy for another slow jazz as Tenzin had gone upstairs to put his children and Jun to bed.

Her firebending niece had begged for a ‘sleepover’ with her sisters, and when Lin had dryly remarked that technically they were having a sleepover already since they were all sleeping under the same roof, Jun had countered in similar fashion that that was of course not what she meant and that she wanted to have a sleepover in the same _room_ \- like mother like daughter...

Lin had agreed after checking with Tenzin, and now her brother had the challenging task of getting three instead of two hyperactive girls ready for bed.

She laughed when she saw her younger brother entering the ballroom again, a perplexed look on his face.

“You look white as a sheet, did they give you that much of a hard time?”

Her brother almost mechanically shook his head. “N-n-no that’s not it. That’s - no - it just - uhm - I saw -“

Kya sighed as her brother fell into his signature stammering whenever he was shocked or confused by something.

“Deep breaths, Ten. What is it you saw that has you so confused?”

“I - the - Lin and - “ he started pointing towards the now empty kids room.

“Well, this doesn’t make much sense. I’ll go have a look myself.” Kya rolled her eyes and she ignored her brothers slightly panicked ‘no!’.

She had to stifle a gasp and a snort however when she turned the corner quietly and saw Lin in an intimate embrace with Tadao, as the two were kissing. Miyuki and Sora’s plan seemed to be working then, Kya thought with a smirk as she quietly retreated again and returned to her brother.

“I see...” she said slowly. “And what exactly is it that makes you stammering so much, Tenzin? Haven’t you ever seen two people kiss?”

A wide grin appeared on her face as she saw her brother’s head turning completely red. “Of course I did- It’s just- it’s Lin and-“

“And what?” Kya challenged him. “She is her own person. She is nothing to you but a friend, so what has you so confused?”

“Oh come on!” Tenzin now pulled himself back together. “It’s just _weird_ you know!? Just as it is weird if I see you kissing someone. It just _is_...” he sighed in frustration.

Kya chuckled as she got up before patting her brother’s shoulder as she walked past him. “Alright, good to hear you are placing Lin and me in the same category. For a moment I thought you were so upset because you were _jealous_ , and that would be very inappropriate..”

“Jealous!? _No_! I am not!” She heard her brother call out after her, and Kya just shook her head in response, a smile of amusement on her lips.

Socially awkward and upset Tenzin was the best Tenzin after all..

..

The following morning Lin woke up next to Tadao and instantly let out a sigh.

“That’s a deep sigh, so early in the morning.” She heard his gruff voice beside her.

“Yeah...” she replied slowly, not sure whether to voice her thoughts or not.

“I hope you don’t regret it...I don’t.” He already made the decision for her, answering one of her unspoken questions. “And as far as I am concerned this was a one time thing. Just like we agreed yesterday before starting this. A proper goodbye, to end this chapter and start a new one as friends. Okay?”

At that Lin turned on her side towards him, wrapping the sheets closer around her as she looked at him, green searching eyes locking with calm and trusting amber ones. The evening before, one dance had turned into two, and a quick foxtrot accompanied by jazzy tunes had turned into a slow, more intimate blues.

And Tadao had told her she looked beautiful tonight, and that he was so happy she and Jun were alright. And she had told him she was genuinely happy to see him before moving to Republic City. And then, caught in the moment, they had almost kissed, before Tadao had murmured that that probably wasn’t a good idea. And Lin had agreed, until she had suggestively remarked that they had never really had a ‘last time’. And Tadao had frowned, had said he didn’t want to give the wrong idea, that he thought they had both agreed that, although they liked one another, their relationship as a couple didn’t have a future. And Lin had reassured him that that was still the case, but had then boldly suggested that that didn’t mean they couldn’t be together just for one last time.

It had seemed a good idea last night, and she was still content with her choice this morning. She was a grown woman, she was free to make decisions such as this one - regardless of what others might think. It was a one time thing anyways. She just hoped Tadao still felt the same too.

“Look, Lin,” Tadao started, hearing the hesitation in her silence. “I came to the party yesterday as your friend, to support you and to say goodbye you. That was my agenda, nothing else. This,” and he gestured at the two of them, “wasn’t expected, but I am happy we spent this last night together. It feels like a proper ending of our relationship. Something to cherish. As much as I agree with ending the romantic connection between us, that doesn’t mean that you won’t always have a special place in my heart, Lin.”

She felt herself blush at that, and immediately internally scolded herself for it. What was she? Some foolish school girl?

“As will you have in mine, Tadao.” She said softly. “And I had an unexpectedly wonderful evening last night.”

“Good. I did too.” He nodded with a smile before sitting up. “Well, I am going to take a shower if you don’t mind. We can talk more later, if you want. I just have some errands to run in the capital this morning.”

“You won’t have breakfast? Where are you staying?”

He shook his head. “No time. It’s past 10 already, I need to head to the pharmacy all the way on the other end of town to get the medicine for my mother I told you yesterday about. It will take me a while to get there. But I am in town for three more days, so we can have lunch maybe? - as friends.”

She nodded at that and averted her eyes discreetly as he got out of bed. “As friends.” She confirmed.

Tadao was right, she thought. Last night had been about saying goodbye as lovers. About being together one last time with both of them knowing that this was the beginning of the end. And it was good that way. Besides, and a hint of a smirk appeared on her lips, it had been a while since she had slept with someone, so there was that benefit too..

A knock on the door pulled her out of her thoughts. Looking for something to cover herself with, she saw Tadao’s white shirt lying at the end of her bed. Slipping it on over a pair of shorts she quickly grabbed from her suitcase, she hurried over to the door.

Opening it she was surprised to see Tenzin standing there with her daughter. By the look on his face he was just as surprised, as she saw him taking in her undoubtedly quite disheveled state. To make matters worse Jun chose that exact moment to be her naive but perceptive six year old self.

“Hi Mama, there is lipstick on your shirt.”

“Hi there kiddo.” She smiled. “Did you have a nice sleepover?”

As Jun nodded happily, Lin tried to ignore the waves of awkwardness radiating off Tenzin. She knew Tenzin knew this was not her shirt, and she could nearly hear his brain processing what this meant.

“Uhm- I - Well-“ he started to stammer. It caused Lin to shoot out of her somewhat dazed state.

“Good morning to you too, Tenzin.” She smirked. “And thank you for bringing Jun. Have you had breakfast yet?”

“No.” Jun answered for him. Good, Lin thought, that bought her some time.

“Do you mind taking Jun downstairs for breakfast in that case? That gives me time to get ready here...” Lin asked Tenzin, signaling with her eyes to the direction where sounds of the running shower being turned off could be heard.

Lin found she wasn’t embarrassed in the slightest, nor feeling awkward about Tenzin knowing it was clearly Tadao in the shower. If anything, she was enjoying seeing Tenzin’s discomfort, he never did well with these kind of personal or intimate things.

“S-Sure.” Tenzin muttered, as a blush had now spread from his neck to his ears.

“Alright, see you later.” Lin replied amused, closing the door again.

Half an hour later, after having said goodbye to Tadao, Lin descended the chairs and entered the dining room for breakfast.

“Hi Lin, did you _sleep_ well?” Miyuki greeted her with a wide smirk, causing Lin to arch an eyebrow at her. “Perfectly well, thank you. How about you?” She replied calmly before sitting down at the table in between Sora and Bumi.

“Well, it looked like you had a great time with your _friend_.” Kya now added, and as Lin looked across the table at her old friend, she saw Kya’s blue eyes burning with eagerness to hear more.

Instead of replying, Lin just grabbed a glass to pour herself something to drink. She enjoyed it much too much that the entire table was nearly bursting with curiosity. Foolish lot.

“Oh come on, Lin. You have to tell us _something_!” Miyuki then whined. At that Lin, slowly looked up from her breakfast.

“Do I? Like what?” She asked innocently.

“Like whether you are together again!” Miyuki exclaimed seriously. From the corner of her eye, Lin noticed Jun who had up until then been contently chatting with the other children perk up and shift her attention to the rest of the table.

Enough games, then, Lin thought. She didn’t want Jun to get her hopes up.

“Look,” she therefore said sternly. “despite it being none of your business, I will have you know that no, Tadao and I are friends and that is it.” Seeing from the corner of her eye that something else had grabbed Jun’s attention again, Lin then continued, “- but I thank you for inviting Tadao. It was a lovely surprise.”

At that Bumi burst out in laughter. “Well, that is most certainly one way of putting it.”

And his contagious laugh caused Lin to smirk as well, before she shrugged. “What can I say. It was a memorable goodbye.”

And her smirk changed into full laughter, joined by the others as Tenzin choked on his juice upon hearing her words.

The three days that followed, Lin spent alternating between spending time with Sora, Miyuki and Tadao, and Bumi, Tenzin, Kya, Suyin and Izumi. She wasn’t quite sure why, but the two groups of friends did not quite seem to get along with one another. She took a mental note to ask Sora or Izumi about it some other time, for now it had to wait, because Republic City was waiting…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With regards to the dances and the music:   
> I know I am inserting Western dances and 20's/30's culture into the story with this type of music and dances - which has two reasons: 1. I have absolutely no idea what kind of music and dancing was in fashion in Asian countries in the 1920's and 30's. and 2. Legend of Korra kind of ruined the accuracy already by inserting a very European oriented sort of steampunk/industrailisation era in their story. The type of cars, development of movies etc. makes it fit with a foxtrot, jazz and blues. So I just went with it (- also because the 20s are THE BEST ERA).


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, I am so sorry for the wait and for this short chapter too! I sort of injured my shoulder and neck, so all time I have without it hurting too badly is spent behind my laptop for work :(. I hope you still like this chapter. It is mainly a chapter to mark the start of the Republic City “era”, and I decided to go easy on Lin with regards to the press, because there is enough drama to come haha. 
> 
> Best,  
> Metope :) 
> 
> Ps. I am not sure if I can update next weekend, I will either just make it, or it will be Monday because I am flying home for Christmas that weekend (so in the days after that, despite still working, I will have all the time in the world because I am quarantining then :”)).

Kya was agitatedly tapping her fingers on the kitchen table as she waited for Lin to return home to the stately Fire Nation residence that was now her home. There was a lot wrong with that image. Kya rarely sat at a kitchen table, she rarely waited for someone, let alone Lin, usually it was the other way around, and lucky was the person who would find her in a agitated state. She was either calm or angry. There wasn’t often a situation in which she would have been chewing on her emotions or frustrations for so long that it would make her agitated. Yet, again, here she was. 

Finally the front door opened and a content, relaxed looking Lin - it would go too far to call it bright looking - entered the house, arms filled with folders full of documents. Jun following behind her. 

“Sorry for taking so long, Kya. I ran into someone I knew from Fire Fountain City. So I went straight to the school to pick Jun up.” Lin apologised as soon as she entered the kitchen after having dropped the folders in her study. 

“And you didn’t avoid them?” Kya asked, her voice revealing surprise.

“Uhm..no?” Lin said slowly, a slight frown on her face as her green eyes studied her friend, picking up on her mood. “Is everything okay?”

The genuine concern deflated Kya’s agitation right away. She had no right to feel this way, did she? “No..no it’s fine.” She therefore sighed, but Lin didn’t let go.

“I find that hard to believe. You are not exactly good at hiding your emotions, you know?”

“Well, you clearly are.” Kya snapped involuntarely and she continued as Lin raised her eyes in questioning surprise.

“Oh I don’t know, Lin.” Kya huffed. “It just confuses me seeing you like this, all happy and lighthearted. Was your life really that hard before? Were we really that much of a burden on you?” 

Kya watched as understanding appeared on Lin’s face, followed quickly however by a guarded and closed off expression she knew so well. There was her answer then. They had been. 

“You are sorely mistaken if lighthearted is even close to what I have been feeling, especially over the past few weeks.” Lin said in a low voice. “But I am not going to apologise for feeling happier than ten years ago. And I don’t have to justify that towards you either. So if you are here as my friend, to support me and to get to know your niece better, then you are most welcome to stay. But if you are just here to study me and judge me then I’d rather you leave.” 

And without waiting for Kya to answer, the earthbender turned around and left the kitchen. 

The waterbender buried her head in her hands with a deep sigh. Way to mess things up, Kya, she thought to herself. 

Kya had arrived a week ago, to help Lin with unpacking boxes, and also because she just wanted some more time to spend with her friend and new niece. She hadn’t announced her arrival beforehand, so Lin was of course not exactly thrilled when she just showed up one evening, duffel bag in hand and announced she was visiting for a couple of nights. 

Lin’s scowl had melted away quickly however when she said it wasn’t just to annoy Lin, but to see Jun as well. Kya and Jun had built up a relatively strong bond already over the short time that they knew each other. That wasn’t exactly surprising seeing as Kya had been there when Jun got saved and also talked through her trauma with her in the days after.

“Aunt Kya, are you okay?” A tiny voice sounded beside her. Looking up, Kya saw Jun standing in her school uniform in the doorway. 

Forcing herself to smile she greeted her niece. “Hey there little firebender. Back from school already, hm? How was your day?”

For a fleeting moment, a shadow washed over Jun’s face before she managed to school her features again and responded with a lighthearted ‘good’. She had picked up on that skill already from her mother then, Kya thought. 

“Why don’t you sit down next to me and tell me about it while I make us some tea, hm?” She said, getting up from her chair.

“I can warm it with my fire?” Jun asked eagerly. 

Kya chuckled. “Of course you can.”

Kya watched amused how Jun diligently set to work as soon as her aunt put the teapot in front of her, concentration written on her face as her eyebrows furrowed slightly. 

“You’re really good at that, Jun.” Kya complimented and Jun smiled widely in response. 

“I will become the best firebender.” She said with such determination that Kya sensed there was more behind that statement than just young dreams.

“Why?” She therefore asked simply

“What do you mean, why?” Jun frowned.

“Well,” Kya started slowly as she went about pouring the two of them a cup of tea. “Is it because you like firebending so much, or because you think that you need to do it for others?”

From the corner of her eye she saw Jun processing her question. The girl may only be six, but she was bright and Kya saw she caught onto what Kya was getting at with her question. 

“I thought... if I become the best, then daddy will be proud.” She answered hesitantly. 

“Why do you think your father isn’t proud of you as it is?”

Jun shrugged. “At school...” she started, but her voice faltered and Kya saw how she was losing herself to whatever thoughts were bothering her. Kya had a good idea of what was going through her niece’s head though.

“You mustn’t listen to what other people say about our family, Jun.” Kya said softly. “Our family is famous, that causes people to talk without knowing what they are talking about.”

“Like with mama when we got here?” 

Kya nodded.  It has been two weeks now since Lin had given a press conference upon arriving in Republic City. Of the entire half hour of questions maybe two minutes had been about her new position. The other 28, Lin had spent dodging impertinent questions from the press about her past with Tenzin, Jun’s parentage and what “this meant”, whatever they meant by that. Lin had been absolutely amazing putting the press in their place, acknowledging that Tenzin was Jun’s father - it didn’t make sense to deny - but that she failed to see how that had anything to do with her new position as ambassador, that if they wanted to know what this meant for Tenzin they should just ask him, but that she hoped the press would have the decency to leave them alone regarding what can only be considered to personal matters. 

After that the press left Lin and Jun in relative peace- the memory of Lin as deputy chief and Toph’s own legacy still fresh - and going after a single mother and her child, even if that mother was Lin Beifong, was a low blow anyways. 

Tenzin however, they did not leave alone. Lin had told Kya that he had called her in absolute fury to ask why she had “sent the press after him”. He had only calmed down when Lin had said she hadn’t done it for her own gain but for Jun’s. They were all going to feel the consequences of Lin’s return for a while, but his family, including his children, were better protected against it, due to the mere fact that they were airbenders. They had a certain stature in this city that Jun did not, and that Lin had lost when she left. It would take time to rebuild that. 

To Kya’s pleasant surprise, her brother hadn’t continued sulking, as Lin put it, but had agreed with Lin.

“I hope we can see daddy soon again.” Jun sighed, pulling Kya out of her thoughts again. 

“We could pay a visit now, if you want?” Kya asked impulsively, eager to cheer Jun up and get out of the house while Lin was probably still angry with her. “It is still early, we can go to Air Temple Island and be back in time before dinner.”

“No it’s okay. I will see dad next time he visits.” Jun said quickly, too quickly Kya noticed. 

“Or...we could call Tenzin and ask if he can come and visit us here?” She tried, and at that Jun perked up andsmiled as she nodded eagerly. Well, that was odd, Kya thought. 

“Okay, dear. Spit it out, what is the problem with Air Temple Island?” Kya then asked directly and Jun’s face fell. 

“I don’t like it there.” She shrugged. 

“Why? You have spent time there before, playing with your sisters. That seemed nice?”

“It is..” Jun nodded, but then she continued in a voice barely more than a whisper, “but the people working in the temple are mean to me and say I do not belong.”

There were few things that could get Kya’s temper from zero to a hundred in mere seconds. Air acolytes belonged to that exclusive group. 

“Lin!” She yelled, hiding her sudden anger rather poorly, “I know you’re mad at me but you have to come in here for a second, Jun needs to tell you something!” 

Then she turned to look at Jun who looked at her with wide anxious eyes. “Jun, don’t you dare listening to those acolytes. They know absolutely nothing. Of course you belong. Of course you are allowed to be there. The person who determines that is Tenzin, and he wants you there, understood?”

Jun nodded a halfhearted nod as her eyes studied her aunt. “I am sorry to have made you angry.” She whispered and Kya shook her head as she pulled Jun from the stool next to her onto her own lap into a hug. 

“You are way too much like your parents sometimes.” She sighed. “You don’t have to hide your emotions or apologise all the time when someone else isn’t hiding them. It is normal to show and share how you feel. Healthy even.” She said, pressing a kiss into the girls hair.

“What is it Kya, if you are trying to use my daughter for me to talk, I’ll turn around again.”

Lin’s gruff voice sounded from the kitchen doorframe and studying her daughter in the arms of her aunt, a troubled expression on her face, she added in a softer tone. “Jun, what is wrong?”

Kya ignored her friend, instead turning to Jun. “Honey, can you please repeat to your mom what you just told me about why you don’t like visiting Air temple Island?”

Lin’s eyebrows already raised at Kya’s question.

“Because the acolytes say I do not belong and should go away.” Jun muttered, eyes averted and trained on her cup of tea.

“What!?” Lin barked, her eyes full of anger. “I shouldn’t be surprised, those cowardly, underhanded, sneaky acolytes.” She growled, “Jun don’t listen to a word they say. You have every right to be there.”

“That’s what I said.” kya said happily. “See Jun?”

Kya saw Lin studying the two of them, while her mind was clearly brooding on something else. “Right.” She then said and she turned on her heels.

“Uh- Lin, what are you going to do?” Kya hesitantly asked, suddenly not so sure if she handled this in the best way.

“I’m going to tell Tenzin to control his acolytes.” Lin called from the hallway. “Please look after Jun for me, will you?”

And before Kya could do anything else, the front door slammed shut and through the kitchen window they saw Lin stalking towards the docks.

“Mama was really angry.” Jun said somewhat perplexed. 

“Isn’t she always though.” Kya grinned and it was her turn to be surprised when Jun uttered a sharp and somewhat indignant _no_.

“Mama is stern sometimes. And serious. But mama is not always angry, aunt Kya.”

The waterbender nodded pensively at that, the remark taking her back to her earlier discussion with Lin.

“Well,” she said, shaking herself out of her thoughts. “How about you show me what you learned in bending class today.”

Jun’s eyes widened. “Really?”

Kya laughed. “Sure, I am a waterbender, remember. I can take it.”

Jun smirked at that, and it struck Kya how much she looked like Lin in that moment. “I’ll kick your butt, aunt Kya.” She said mischievously and she jumped up giggling when Kya called after her in mock indignation. 

..

The subtle shaking of the earth beneath his feet was how he knew was Lin on the island even before she had announced herself.

It also told him that she was angry before he heard her thundering voice calling his name.

He rushed outside, ignoring the questions from his children and wife as to what was going on that had made Lin so angry - he had no idea himself after all.

“You!” She pointed her finger at him as soon as she saw him, green eyes narrowed and shooting daggers at him.

“Lin- wh- what is going on? Did something happen?” Tenzin stammered. “Is Jun alright?”

“Yes. But no thanks to _you_.” Lin snarled.

“What? what don you mean? I don’t understand?” Tenzin frowned, and noticing all the acolytes outside having halted their work as they startp at the two of them he added. “Why not come inside for a cup of tea? Where we can speak in private?”

“I don’t want any tea! And I don’t mind anyone else hearing, in fact the more the merrier!”

Finding himself growing annoyed he raised his voice as well “Fine! But will you please tell me what had you in such a state!?”

“I came here to tell you to keep your fanclub under control!” Lin snapped. “My daughter does not want to visit this island anymore because apparently its spoiled, sneaky inhabitants have been telling her that she does not belong here and should leave! To a _child_!”

Tenzin frowned. Surely that couldn’t be true..could it? But then again, if he thought about it, he had seen them throw some looks and whisper a lot when Jun visited. He had assumed it had been directed at him, but maybe it wasn’t..

“That is-“

“That is unacceptable, is what it is!” Lin interrupted him, and Tenzin swallowed, had seldom seen her this angry.. never poke a mama Platypus bear..

He nodded. “It is and I will-“

“Tell these underhanded arrogant no-goods to shut it. Or I will!”

She was challenging him. Pushing his buttons, and it worked. “Now wait a second! Is that a threat!?”

Lin scoffed at that, standing close to him and looking up at him with those jade eyes, that swirled with anger, frustration and..guilt?

It caused his own anger to subside slightly. “Lin,...” he muttered, not sure where to go with that sentence.

“When it comes to my daughter I do what is necessary to protect her. Especially when it comes to our messy past. Jun should not have to feel the consequences of the mistakes I made - the mistakes _we_ made..” Lin’s voice was quiet now and laced with sadness.

Tenzin let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers. “You are right, Lin. I will talk to them.” He muttered.

“Good.” With that she turned around, and catapulting herself with a rock from the island, she managed to jump off the pier onto the ferry that had only just started to make its way back to the city again.

Well, Tenzin thought. If anything had any doubt whether it was really Lin Beifong who had returned to Republic City, this had surely settled it. 


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tadaaaa, I made it on time with a new chapter :)! Thanks to all of you who wished me well, my shoulder is much better ^^!  
> I hope you will like this chapter - it is a rather sad one, but I still oddly liked writing it. It has quite some Jun-Tenzin and Lin-Tenzin moments in them.  
> Let me know in the comments ^^!  
> Best,  
> Metope

The asthma attack came unexpectedly. There was no warning, and even later she wasn’t able to figure out what had triggered it. One moment she was doing her homework together with Jinora and Ikki. The next she was wheezing for air as her sisters anxiously asked what was wrong. They were alone, daddy had gone to fetch them some snacks.

Well, they were alone _safe_ for an acolyte lady. With frantic eyes Jun searched for the woman’s attention, but the warm eyes and soft smile with what they all looked at her sisters and daddy was not the expression she was now met with.

“Enough with the antics and seeking attention.” The woman spoke, and Jun vaguely heard Jinora say that she really didn’t think Jun was pretending. But it didn’t matter, the woman didn’t seem inclined to help, all the while Jun continued to wheeze and pant for air as her hands frantically went through the pockets of her dress.

She had forgotten her inhaler. Mama had told her countless times not to forget it, especially when she wasn’t with her, and it had happened anyways.

“I’m going to get daddy, Jun!” Jinora called out and she was out the door in a second, followed by her sister.

That left Jun with the acolyte who was looking at her with cold eyes. “I mean it. Cut it out, you spoiled bastard brat!”

Dark spots entered her swimming vision and by now Jun wasn’t so sure anymore if it was because she couldn’t get any air or because the lady terrified her.

Suddenly an inhaler was pushed into her mouth while strong arms lifted her off the chair and held her as someone was pushing the buttons of the inhalers so that it released its medicine.

Slowly, her vision returned to normal again, as her lungs managed to fill themselves with air, and opening her eyes properly, she found herself surrounded by red and yellow fabric and looking up into familiar grey eyes.

..

Tenzin ran faster than he had run in ages as soon as his daughters came running into the kitchen saying that Jun had an asthma attack and didn’t have her inhaler and needed help.

Ever since Lin had told him of Jun’s condition, he carried an inhaler with him wherever he went. No matter if Jun was with him or not.

So, armed with the small device he airbent-ran himself to the room the girls had been making their homework.

“...you spoiled bastard brat!” Was the first he heard when he pushed open the doors in one go, seeing one of the acolytes standing in the room with a cold stare directed at his daughter who was gasping for air with a frantic and terrified look in her eyes.

In an instant he had taken her in his arms, lowering the two of them to the ground and holding her in his arms so that her lungs could inflate easily as he gave her the inhaler.

After a few puffs he saw her green eyes, _Lin’s_ eyes, shift back into focus. A moment later recognition appeared on her face, and the whimpered ‘ _daddy’_ that followed, nearly broke his heart.

He pulled her into a tight embrace as her tears started to fall, sobs shaking her body as her hands curled into the fabric of his robes. “Sssh, it’s okay Jun. You are okay now. I am here. You’re alright.” He soothed her.

Looking up he saw the acolyte looking at them, a mixture of confusion and disapproval on her face.

“What happened?” He asked, getting up from the floor with Jun still in his arms. His voice was clipped and he tried his hardest to keep his tone levelled.

The woman did an impressive job at schooling her features and putting on an innocent look. But he had heard what he had, and with his conversation with Lin fresh in his memory, he didn’t fall for it for even a second.

He had spoken to them after Lin’s visit. Had diplomatically said that Jun was his daughter just as much as Jinora and Ikki were, and that he expected them to treat her accordingly. They had all nodded in unison. It clearly hadn’t been enough.

“I don’t know master Tenzin. One moment she was fine, the next the poor girl was gasping for air. I didn’t know what to do, I was so scared-“ to emphasize her words – all lies – the woman approached the two of them as if she wanted to lovingly pat Jun’s head. If Tenzin had had any doubt still, the way Jun started squirming and whimper as the woman moved her hand to reach for Jun, would have told him all he needed to know.

Sharply turning away from her, he kept his daughter out of her reach. “Cut it out, Mala.” He hissed.

“I heard you speaking to my daughter just before I entered. Heard what you called her!”

The acolyte shook her head, eyes widening somewhat as she realized things were not going well for her.

“Master Tenzin, you must be mistaken, I would never-“

“You called her a..a...oh I can’t even bring myself to say it! But I know what I heard. My daughter could have been severely ill now or worse, all because of your malicious intents and refusal to come to her help. And how dare you stand here in front of me and lie to my face about it!” He now all but yelled.

“But master Tenzin, _please_...” the woman now started to beg. But again, Tenzin didn’t let her finish.

“I don’t want to hear it! In fact, I want you to go to your dorm, pack your things and leave this island tonight!” He roared.

He heard Jun whimper as he raised his voice and he protectively moved to cover the back of her head with his hand, as she still had her head buried his shoulder.

“But-“

“You heard me. Leave. Now!”

At that the acolyte finally realized that this was not up for discussion. And with a choked down sob she fled the room.

After she left Tenzin just stood there for a few more seconds, breathing deeply in and out to calm his nerves, while his daughter was still in his arms.

“Jun, are you alright sweetheart?” He then asked in a calmer and soft voice while sitting down with her at the table.

Jun finally moved a little away from him so she could look at him. Her eyes were puffy and red from crying and she still had the hints of a haunted look in her eyes.

“Why do they say these things, daddy?” She asked in a wobbly voice as another tear made its way down her cheek.

Tenzin wasn’t sure if he had ever felt more emotional pain than in this moment, seeing his daughter so hurt at such a young age.

“Because people can be very narrowminded Jun. And because I didn’t look after you enough. I didn’t make sure enough that people were treating you correctly. I- I didn’t realize either that people could be so... _mean_..“ he sighed, and it was true. He instinctively always saw the best in people. Not always the cleverest instinct, as it turned out. “But I’ll do better, I promise Jun. Because I love you, you know that right? And you are always more than welcome here. Anyone who tells you differently is wrong.”

He saw his daughter nod, her small form relaxed ever so slightly, telling him that his words had reached their target.

“I love you too, daddy.” She sighed. “Thank you for saving me.”

“I will always save you, Jun. Always.” Tenzin murmured as he pressed a kiss to her forehead.

As Jun settled against his chest again in response, they continued to sit like that, until he eventually heard her breathing even out as she drifted to sleep.

“What’s going on here? Is Jun ok?” The sharp voice of Lin broke the comfortable the silence.

..

“What is going on here? Is Jun ok?” She demanded as soon as she entered the room Pema had said her daughter and Tenzin were in.

Worry was audible in her voice, understandably so since she had run into Jinora and Ikki on her way here , both nearly besides themselves, while Pema tried to comfort them. Jun had had an asthma attack, was all Pema could tell her. ‘And daddy was really angry at one of the acolytes, we heard him yell!” Ikki had called after her.

It had been enough for her to almost run towards Jun.

“Jun had an asthma attack.” Tenzin explained, “she didn’t have her inhaler with her, but Jinora and Ikki went to get me and I made it in time.”

Lin studied her daughter, asleep in Tenzin’s arms, with dried up tear tracks on her face and with a sad and fearful expression. This had been about more than just an asthma attack.

“And?..” she therefore asked, folding her arms and arching a questioning eyebrow. “Your heart is beating at an insane speed which it only does when you are upset and Ikki said you yelled at an acolyte.”

Tenzin nodded, and Lin frowned a little at the flash of anger that crossed his face as he began to speak. “There was an acolyte with the girls, watching over them as they did their homework. When Jun got her attack, she did _nothing_ to help Jun. And I caught her talking with _incredible_ disrespect to Jun. So-“

“What!?” Lin interrupted him. “You see, Tenzin!? I told you those acolytes are a problem! You said you would talk to them!”

“I did!” Tenzin countered. “And if you would just listen, then -“

But she was too angry to listen. Too angry at the acolytes and too angry at herself for having left her daughter alone here on the island. “No, you listen to me.” She hissed. “Jun could have been severely ill now because of that woman, or worse! If you hadn’t been on time... “ Lin shook her head as her throat constricted as she refused to think of what could have happened if Tenzin hadn’t been there on time.

“But I _was_ on time.” Tenzin said softly. “Thank the spirits that I was on time. And yes, Ikki heard me yell. I yelled at the acolyte. I sent her to pack her things. I don’t want her around me or any of my children or family and friends.” He said in a low voice and Lin couldn’t help but be surprised at that.

“That is - that is quite something.” She muttered. “Being an acolyte is something you are for life. Being sent away is...”

“Possible the worst that can happen to an acolyte.” Tenzin nodded. “I know. But so is refusing to help an innocent child fighting for her life, just because she doesn’t fit into how you picture things. Someone like that is not cut out to be an acolyte at all.”

The bitterness in his voice made Lin swallow as she tentatively stepped forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. It was the first time they touched each other, that she touched him, in seven years. She realized it with a start. Up until then, they had purposefully kept a good feet distance between them.

“Thank you.” She whispered.

“Standing up for my daughter needs no thank you.” He replied as he caught her gaze. His stormy grey eyes staring seriously into her own. “You might have had your doubts, Lin. But I am serious about being a parent to Jun. I hope that tonight showed you that.”

She gave a slow nod in response, somewhat perplexed by the determined expression on his face. The Tenzin she had known would try to avoid, twist and spin around confrontation. Maybe he really had changed, like everyone kept telling her..

..

It was only a week later that Lin found herself in a similar situation. With a teary-eyed but this time also remorseful looking Jun sitting sideways on the lap of her father in an empty classroom of the Republic City school.

Lin had been in an important meeting for the larger part of the afternoon, and her secretary - now _ex_ -secretary - had deemed it unnecessary to call her out of the meeting when the school had called regarding a matter relating Jun.

As soon as she did receive the news, she had rushed to the school.

“What is all this then?” Lin asked tentatively. There weren’t a lot of instances in which Jun sported this look on her face.

“Do you want to tell your mom yourself?” Tenzin asked gently, but Jun shook her head determinedly, her cheeks coloring red in shame.

“It’s okay, Jun.” Tenzin coaxed gently, “I hardly think your mother will be angry, I wasn’t either, was I?”

Lin frowned at that. It was nothing like Jun to be afraid of her reaction. If she was, she must be deeply ashamed of something that happened.

“Alright then I will tell her-“ Tenzin started but he was interrupted by a frantic “no!” From Jun.

“I’ll do it.” She said with newfound determination. But Lin saw her struggling with finding the words of how to start.

“It’s okay, Pebble. Whatever happened, you can tell me.” She said gently as she went to sit down on a nearby chair.

“I used radiowavebending on a classmate even though I know you said I can never use it on people.” Jun then said quickly, in a voice barely more than a whisper and while keeping her eyes trained on her feet.

“The teacher got really angry. And then they called you and the parents of my classmate and they were angry too. And then daddy came.. I am sorry..”

Lin felt her stomach drop at her daughter’s words. It was bound to happen at some poit that Jun would use her bending on another person, as children do when they try to find their limits. She just hoped it had been in defense and not as an attack. “Wh- what made you decide to do that, Jun?” She therefore asked, careful not to let any emotion shine through on either her face or in her voice.

Instead of answering a tear rolled down her daughter’s cheek as she suddenly let out a whimper and choked on a sob before swiftly climbing off Tenzin’s lap and throwing herself in Lin’s arms instead.

The earthbender quickly caught her daughter, lifting her into her arms and holding her tight while rubbing soothing circles over her daughters back as she cried, face buried in the crook of her mother’s neck.

“Hey Jun, it’s okay, I’m here…It’s alright..” Lin tried to comfort her daughter as her eyes, filled with alarm and pain over her child’s misery, searched for Tenzin’s.

She saw her own emotions reflected in his expression.

“Apparently this classmate has continuously bullied her over the past few months about..us...” Tenzin supplied. “Ikki told me, I ran into her before going to the teacher’s office. Apparently it has been going on for a while, but Jun had told Ikki and Jinora not to mention it. Today...it was apparently the last straw for her. She bent radiowaves so that she created a sort of pressure in this boy’s mind.”

Tenzin’s voice had a hint of awe in it as he said this.

“I talked with her about using her bending...Jun understands that what she did was wrong and that this must not happen again. But…I also told her that I can understand very well that it must have been very hard for her, and that for future reference, she has to come to us sooner. So that we can address the matter.” Tenzin continued and Lin nodded as she continued to rock her daughter whose crying had subsided now, safe for the occasional sniffing or hiccup.

“The kid’s parents were of course besides themselves.” Tenzin replied bitterly. “But I told them and the teacher that no child should be bullied. No kid of mine should be bullied. And that yes, Jun should have dosed her defense, but that she will always have _my_ permission to defend herself whenever she deems necessary. And that they should think twice before thinking of bullying any kid, or in this case the granddaughter of Avatar Aang ever again.”

Lin’s chest filled itself with warmth and gratefulness at Tenzin’s words on how he had come to their daughter’s defense. And especially for making her lineage so explicit. Part of her hadn’t been so sure if Tenzin would be willing to recognize Jun fully as one of Aang’s grandchildren as well. But he did.

Again, since Tenzin knew of Jun’s existence it had surprised her time and again how he had fully committed to being her father from day one, decorum be damned.

“I am sorry I couldn’t be here on time, kiddo.” She said to her daughter. “But it sounds like your daddy did a pretty good job at coming to your rescue.” She looked at Tenzin as she said this, and sent him a small smile and a mouthed thank you.

Jun gave her a nod a hint of a smile even before her face grew serious again. “I don’t want to go to school anymore. And not to Air Temple Island. I just want to stay with you.”

Lin’s heart sank. “Why don’t we first return home and we can talk about it there, hm? You can’t not go to school, you have to learn after all.”

“Then I want to go back to Fire Fountain City. There no one was mean.” Her daughter countered defiantly.

“But we live here now, Jun..” Lin started, but it caused Jun to break away from her mother and jump off her lap.

“But I don’t _wánt_ to live here!” She yelled angrily, her whole body tensed up and Lin could feel her daughter’s heart beating angrily.

Waves of guilt washed over her at the sight. She had done this to her daughter. If she just had stayed in Fire Fountain City, none of this would have happened. However, Jun wouldn’t have had Tenzin in her life either.. did that weight up to what she was putting her daughter through right now?

“Jun, I know this is incredibly hard. And none of us like it that people are giving us such a hard time. But we will get through this. It will get better, I promise.” Tenzin said. “We will talk to the school, and besides...by the looks of that other kid, I think you scared him enough today for him to think twice before he will think of bothering you again.. this will pass by Jun. I promise you. They are just intimidated by you. By your family and by your bending. It is strange to them and then sometimes people do stupid things like this. But you are a bright, kind and friendly girl. You’ll make friends. And until then you will always have Jinora and Ikki, okay?”

Lin watched intently at her daughter, curious what Tenzin’s words would have for an effect on her. To her surprise, Jun let out a deflated sigh before slowly nodding with a snif. “Fine.” She said sulkily. “Can we now go home please? I am hungry.” She then asked Lin

“Of course, kiddo. You go ahead and wait in the hallway. I just want to have a word with your father.”

The girl obediently nodded before leaving the room. Following her footsteps with seismic sense to check if Jun would do as she was told, Lin felt her move to sit down on a chair not far from the classroom. Good.

“Lin-“ Tenzin’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. “I am sorry - I - I hope you don’t think I overstepped. When they couldn’t reach you, they called me and- well I am her father so..”

“No!” She interrupted him. “No, of course I don’t mind.” She clarified as she saw Tenzin’s hesitant expression. “If anything I am grateful for you handling this. By the sound of it you did a great job. Let’s just...hope that you are right this will blow over soon.”

Tenzin nodded. “It isn’t easy to see her like this.”

“No, it isn’t.” Lin agreed, and she turned away from him as she suddenly felt another wave of guilt wash over her, forcing her mouth to shape in a downward slope.

“Lin..what is it?” Tenzin asked carefully.

“Nothing. I just- this, this is _exactly_ why I left all those years ago. Because I didn’t want this for my child or for you, or even for myself. Yet here we are, because of my damned ambition.” She confessed without turning around, just wrapping her arms around her frame in an attempt to give herself some support.

Tenzin didn’t say anything to that for quite a while before she felt his hand on her shoulder, just like she had done to him a week ago. “I am always here to talk if you need it, Lin. We have to do this together, whether you like it or not.” And with that she heard him leave the room.

She stayed in the empty classroom for a few more minutes in an attempt to collect herself and will away the tears of frustration that were building themselves up behind her eyes. When she felt sufficiently composed again she swung the door open and approached her daughter with a smile plastered on her face. Time to go home.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I am with another update :)! Some Lin- Toph scenes this time!  
> I also hope there aren’t too many typos since I wrote this entirely on my phone because I am at my parents’ for the holidays and I couldn’t bring my laptop.. 
> 
> Let me know what you think of this chapter! I’ll try to update again before Christmas!
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

She had been ambassador to Republic City for a little over six months when she finally felt like she started to enter some sort of routine.

Tenzin had been right about the people of Republic City, their kids, and the acolytes coming to terms with Lin’s and Jun’s presence and more importantly, with Jun’s place in Tenzin’s life. It helped that word of Jun’s bending had spread quickly. And where the initial reaction of the Fire Nation Palace Staff had been one of fear, the people of Republic City took it better. It almost seemed as if it didn’t come as a surprise to them, she was after all the daughter of Councilman Tenzin and Lin Beifong, and the granddaughter of Avatar Aang, Master Katara and Chief Beifong. No wonder the child was an excellent bender.

As Jun started to feel more at ease and at home in Republic Fity, bringing friends home to play with and getting good grades in school, so did Lin.

The tension that had been there a few months ago with Kya and Suyin had subsided, she frequently wrote or called with Sora and Miyuki and Tadao would stop by every now and then - never for longer than one night, and even that arrangement was coming to an end, bringing them to the stage of good friends finally.

With Tenzin, Lin had figured out a suitable system of co-parenting where Jun in principle stayed with her mother, but would spend every other weekend on Air Temple Island - that had been more difficult to her surprise than anticipated, the first few times. In return, Lin had even had Jinora and Ikki over for a sleep over with Jun occasionally. She was grateful this hybrid family situation had come so easily to them, even Pema was tolerable in all of this. She kept her distance from them, declining invitations to stay for dinner. She allowed Tenzin back in her life for Jun. That didn’t mean she was going to play along with some sort of hybrid extended flexible family concept.

Besides, she didn’t want to give people the wrong idea, which it turned out, wasn’t an irrational worry. Suyin had been visiting and had one night suggestively remarked that she and Tenzin were getting along well. Lin had brushed it aside, but when Suyin had kept pushing, she had lost her temper somewhat.

“Listen,” she had hissed angrily. “What brought me in this situation in the first place, is the fact that the airhead has a half hearted separation with his wife, comes to me crying about it, I manage to keep my distance the entire night, but by the end of it he says it has always been me, that he loves me and wants to be with _me_. So under the influence of hope, dreams and some alcohol I finally cave, only finding him the next morning ready to return to Pema, saying it doesn’t matter that it is me whom he loves because he needs to return to Pema. And I am left alone and as it turns out later, with child. So, sorry but no, after that I have no desire whatsoever to rekindle my relationship with Tenzin past the bare minimum that is necessary for Jun. It cost me long enough to separate the love I have known and do hope to find again some day, from the love I once had for Tenzin. I am not going to blur that again.”

Suyin had sat there for several moments, blinking and processing. “He said all that to you and then he _still_ left?” She had muttered eventually and Lin had nodded bitterly.

“I am sorry Lin. I won’t joke about it again.” Suyin had said firmly at that, disapproval over Tenzin’s words written on her face. 

“Please don’t act differently to Tenzin now, Su.” Lin had cautiously remarked upon seeing her sister’s expression. “It is in the past and he is the first person, even before me, to admit that what he did that night was wrong on so many levels. He has changed- several people already told me that, but I have since seen it for myself as well.” 

Suyin had nodded begrudgingly. “I always liked Bumi better though.” She had mumbled. 

“Mom better never hear of this, or she will kill him. Last airbender or not.”

Lin had snorted at that. “Fat chance that mom hears of this, I haven’t heard of her in months. Do we even know where she has gone after leaving the South Pole?”

The bitterness was audible in her voice, and Su had sadly shaken her head. “I really thought she would change..”

Well, be careful what you wish for, Lin learned. Because only a few weeks later, her mother had stopped by. 

Between her and Toph things were definitely tensed at best, but the hostility Lin had once felt had disappeared. And it helped that Toph seemed to have taken quite a shine to Jun. It had been brought about when upon her arrival, she had searched for her granddaughter and she had noticed Jun firebending on her own in the courtyard of the residence, Surrounded by a couple of radios and phonographs that she would occcasionally use to radiobend. 

When Toph had asked what her granddaughter was up to, Lin had answered with a shrug that, since there wasn’t exactly a firebender teacher who could teach Jun anything on radio wavebending, Jun had taken to teaching herself. 

“It made sense to me.” Lin had supplied.” After all that’s how Su and I learned too. And you too...”

Toph nodded in approval. “Figuring it out yourself is the best type of learning. I knew it would be much better if you learned yourself first, than if I taught you.” 

“Yes..well, that doesn’t mean their mother doesn’t need to even so much as take an interest in their child.” Lin had snapped at that, ruining the lightheartedness of the moment but not having been able to help herself. 

Toph had sighed and had then patted Lin on her back. “I know, kiddo.” 

“I heard you got off to a flying start here.” Toph then had tried to pick up the conversation again. 

“Yes” Lin had replied quickly, and then somewhat insecurely “thank you for the present..the necklace, it’s really nice.”

Relief had flashed over her mother’s face at that. “I am glad to hear. Katara assured me it looked pretty, but you never know, you know?” 

Lin had hummed at that as her eyes desperately look around the kitchen they were sitting in for anything new to talk about. Luckily, Jun then had entered the kitchen again. “Grandma Toph” it had been almost more of a statement than a greeting. Jun had only spent a short time with her grandmother, and it had been in the days right after “the Incident”, as Lin now referred to it in her mind. 

“Hello there, kid.” Toph had turned to her granddaughter. “For as far as I can tell, those were some powerful firebending moves you made out there. Pretty bad ass.” 

Lin had groaned at the language, but Jun had beamed. The ice had been broken and from that moment on, she saw the two of them together talking about spirits know what, more often than not. 

One evening, when getting Jun ready for bed, she asked Jun about what they talked about, and her daughter shrugged. “You know, mom. Just things. About bending , how school is. What it was like living in Fire Fountain City, you..” 

Lin’s hands, brushing Jun’s hair, stilled. “Me?”

“Yeah,” Jun answered lightly, “I asked her about you, about when you were little.” 

“And..what did she say?” Lin asked carefully. It felt a little wrong to ask her daughter for the details of a private conversation, but she feared for what her mother might have told Jun and if it would change her daughter’s perception of her. 

Jun, with the attention span of every six year old, had gotten bored of the conversation however, and shrugged a little annoyed. “I don’t know. Just things. Are you done brushing yet?”

Lin didn’t say anything at that, just nodded and put the brush down. 

Jun hopped off the stool she had been on to crawl into her bed. Lin somewhat absentmindedly read her a story as her mind raced over what Toph might have said or asked about her. 

Once done and entering the living room again where Toph was lazily bending her meteor bracelet in all sorts of shapes, she moved to sit at the table to get some more paperwork done. 

“What on earth has you so nervous, Lin? You’ve been more tensed than I sensed you over the past few days.”

Lin’s back went rigid, her mouth shaping into a thin line. “You’re not so calm yourself either.” She countered. “Your heartbeat is faster than it should be..especially at your age.” 

Toph chuckled. “Touche” but then her face grew serious again and Lin felt the atmosphere change from a charged tension to a more anxious but also sincere one. “If it is not doing you any good that I am here, Lin, then you just have to say the word and I’ll go. To a hotel, or away entirely if you prefer that...”

Lin now dropped her papers and buried her head in her hands. “And let the media have a field day reporting that Lin Beifong is not letting her mother stay in her huge mansion? I don’t think so.”

“But you do want me to leave?”

She considered the question and found to her own surprise that the ‘no’ she gave as answer was a sincere one. 

“Ok..” Toph drawled somewhat apprehensively. “Then...do you want to talk about it?”

Lin looked up from her hands with a sceptically arched eyebrow at that. “ _Talk_ about it?”

Toph shrugged. “Katara says talking about things, getting them out in the open is good.”

Lin blinked at that as she studied her mother. 

“I can imagine you are giving me several sceptical looks now.” Toph mumbled. 

Lin sighed audibly. “Can you blame me?” 

“Look, Lin, I am trying here!” Toph now raised her voice. “But you have to give me something for this to work.” 

At that Lin hardened her gaze. “I have to _give_ you something? What is that even?”

Toph rubbed her hand over her face in irritation. “Perhaps I better go then...seems like that is what you really want.”

Her mother’s irritation was the last straw, slamming her hands down on the table she cried out in a volume loud enough to express her frustration yet low enough as to not wake Jun.

“I don’t know, mom! I know we had a moment on Air Temple Island, and- and I am grateful for the necklace. But that is also the first time you even got me a present since I was 18. And I am happy that you seem to get along with Jun. But then she tells me you talked about me with her, and I can’t help but fear what you told her. Because when Jun calls me mama, it means something, to her and to me. But when I call you mom, I am not so sure about that. And I don’t want Jun to ever get to that point. So yes I am tensed! And angry, because I want you to be involved, and I want you to care, but I don’t know how to talk to you when you are here and I hate that I feel anxious when I hear my daughter talked with her grandmother about me, because that is not how things are supposed to be!”

She saw her mother’s mouth twist and her eyebrows furrow as sadness entered her face. There was a long silence as Lin looked expectantly at her mother as Toph seemed to be searching for what to say.

“Jun, asked me what you were like when you were as old as she is now.” Toph eventually started, her voice uncharacteristically quiet. “So I told her that you were a bright child, a great bender and just as goodhearted and selfless as she is, that I recognise that of you in her. But also her need to protect others, her feistiness and her sense for a little mischief every now and then. I told her I am proud of you and Su as my daughters and that I am proud of al my grandchildren. That’s all.”

As Lin processed those words, silence descended again.

“Oh.” She then said, as she got up so abruptly that her chair almost fell over, before she almost ran out of the living room into her bedroom, slamming the door shut and leaning against it. 

That hadn’t been what she had expected. Repeating the words over and over in her head, she soon felt guilty for her outburst. And for leaving the room just like that.

Opening the door again with just as much force as she had closed it, she stalked back into the living room only to find it to be empty. Looking to her right she saw the door of the guest room ajar, no one was in there.

Without a second thought she used seismic sense, just in time to locate her mother’s steps at the end of the garden leading up to the house.

She was out the door in an instant, her speed fuelled by emotion and feeling, ratio pushed to the back for once.

“Mom!” She called and the older woman paused, turning around to face Lin just before Lin reached her.

Instinctively Lin suddenly wrapped her arms around her mother, pulling her into a tight embrace and resting her head in the crook of her mother’s neck.

“I am sorry I yelled.” She didn’t know what else to say and she hoped the hug would convey her feelings well enough. It felt weird hugging her mother. She couldn’t remember when she had done so the last time. Actually, she couldn’t remember ever having hugged her mom as an adult.

She wasn’t someone who handed out hugs just like that anyways. Miyuki or Tadao would pull her into one every now and then. But of her own accord, her hugs were scarce and reserved for special moments. Except for Jun of course, Jun got all the hugs she wanted. 

Slowly her mother’s arms came up to rest on her daughter’s back, reciprocating the hug. “I am trying, Lin. I really am.”

Lin nodded as she pulled away a little so she could look at her mother. “Please don’t leave?

Or at least not now at night. Stay?”

Toph nodded slowly. “I guess one more day won’t hurt. “

Relieved Lin let go of Toph and together the two women returned to the house again. There was still a long road ahead, but Lin felt a little more confident that night that they would be able to get there eventually. 


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,  
> I managed to update before Christmas, yay!  
> So this chapter has a tiny trigger warning for the last paragraph, related to the events in the real world we are currently living with. See the note at the end for that. 
> 
> I hope you will like this chapter, and I’m sorry I am sending you into Christmas with sort of a cliffhanger :”).
> 
> Best and happy holidays!
> 
> Metope

Jun’s seventh birthday was celebrated ridiculously extravagantly if you asked Lin. If only because the number of guests was almost three times as much as years before. 

She deserved it though. 

Usually it would be just Miyuki, Tadao, Sora and she and then some friends from school. This time, however, aside from them, the entire family came to celebrate as well. Su brought her entire family, giving Lin the chance to finally meet Baatar and Su’s two eldest children as well. Then there were of course Tenzin and Pema with their children, Bumi, Izumi and her son and daughter, with a birthday card and an note of apology for not being there from Uncle Zuko, and Kya came with Katara- who said this would probably be the first and also last time she would be able to still make the journey from the South Pole for any birthday, and she wasn’t going to let it pass. Even Toph was there. 

Lin had observed her daughters, cheeks red with excitement and eyes beaming more with every present and hug she received, every compliment on her dress and every new school friend that showed up - Lin hadn’t commented on it, but she had noticed her daughter had been quite anxious the past few days whether her friends would show up.

It had been a good day, as were the weeks that followed. Her job remained challenging, but she liked that about it. There were many meetings - with the council, where she and Tenzin kept a professional distance between them to prevent any compromise of integrity from occurring - and with other ambassadors and stakeholders related to the instabilities caused by triads and other organised crime. She found she worked together quite well with her mother’s successor. The chief wasn’t as hands on and charismatic as her mother had been, but he did an alright job, and was easy to talk and negotiate with. 

But all in all, things were going well. Months, even years later, Lin would often think back to that time, chastising herself for not having enjoyed it more. For there were challenging years to come. And it had all started with her catching a silly flu.

..

“Daddy?”

Tenzin looked up from his newspaper to see his daughter standing hesitantly in the door opening.

“Yes Jinora?”

“Jun is already here..She just got dropped off by the chauffeur and not by aunt Lin and she says she is staying for longer than just the weekend.”

His eldest daughter gave him a pointed look as she said this, but Tenzin couldn’t quite figure out yet, why.

“Perhaps aunt Lin had an obligation at work that prevent her from dropping her off herself. It also explains why she is early.” He got up as he said this. Usually he would make sure he was at the dock of the ferry to greet Jun. It also gave him the chance to briefly talk to Lin and ask her how Jun had been that week and if there was anything he needed to know. 

“I don’t think that’s it. Are you coming?” Was all Jinora said wisely before skipped back to the living room.

His eldest could be as wise as an adult and as playful as the nine year old she was in the same minute, Tenzin thought, as he followed her, curious to find out why Jun would be staying longer.

Not that he complained. He hadn’t seen her in fourteen days, as he and the kids and Pema had traveled to the South Pole to visit his mother and the new Avatar. Korra would soon turn 15, in about two years she would finish her training. Tenzin would teach her airbending then, and it seemed like a good idea to already get acquainted with what he could only describe as a very eager, confident teenager. But even if Lin would think it was a good idea Jun would stay a few days longer because of that, it was nothing like her not to check that with him first.

As he entered the living room, Jun’s face lit up as soon as she saw him and she ran towards him to give him a hug which he happily reciprocated.

“So, what’s this business about staying longer, hm? Although I am delighted to have you here a few days longer of course.” He asked lightly, but the smile on his face disappeared when he saw Jun’s face grow serious before she ran back to her bag and pulled a note out of it which she handed to him.

“Mama has the flu and she doesn’t want me to catch it, because of the asthma and all, so she asks if I can stay longer this time.” Jun spoke, already saying what was in the note, because as Tenzin read it quickly, it became clear Lin hadn’t thought it necessary to elaborate more beyond writing she would be very grateful if Jun could stay a few more days until she was feeling better again.

“So, can I...?” Jun’s hesitant voice pulled Tenzin out of his thoughts,

“Yes, yes of course you can, Jun.” Tenzin said quickly, and as he looked over her head to his wife, he saw Pema nodding in confirmation as well.

“Was she very sick, Jun?” Tenzin then asked. But Jun shrugged. “She was sneezing a lot all week. And then yesterday someone from work brought her home and mama was really cranky about it.” The girl chuckled as she said this. “But then she went to sleep and she stayed in bed since then. I made a sandwich myself for dinner and for breakfast and also for mama.” Jun said proudly, but then added with a frown. “But mama said she is supposed to look after me and not the other way around so then she asked the chauffeur to take me here early. I think she was feeling pretty sick.”

“Aha..” Tenzin nodded in response as his mind went over Jun’s words. Lin was never sick. And even when she was, she would just pull through, so for Lin to eventually give in and stay in bed, it had to be a nasty flu she caught. 

Turning towards his wife, he said “I think I am going to head over there and make sure she is okay. She has staff of course, but you know Lin..she probably sent them all away. And it sounds like a pretty bad flu..”

His wife thankfully nodded in understanding. “Just be careful, I wouldn’t want you to get sick as well.”

Tenzin nodded before quickly turning around and leaving.

Arriving at Lin’s, he accessed the stately mansion with the spare set of keys Lin had given them in case there ever was an emergency with Jun - well, this counted as an emergency too, Tenzin thought.

The house was dark. Walking upstairs he saw light coming from under a door on his left, that was probably where Lin was then.

Opening the door gently after having knocked without response, he found the mighty metalbender curled up and shivering under a blanket, eyes screwed shut and discomfort written on her face. Gently touching her forehead with his hand, he established that she most definitely had a fever.

When he softly called her name, watery eyes opened but recognition didn’t settle. On her nightstand stood a cup of tea gone cold, and now that he thought about it, it was rather cold in general in the room. 

So he set to work. First lighting the fire place in her room and grabbing some more blankets to cover Lin with. Then he made a new pot of tea. 

As he went to work, Lin seemed to be pulled a little out of her delirious sleep.

“You’re gonna be sick..”

“No I won’t.” He answered gently. “And even if I do, I still wouldn’t leave. You need some help.”

“I don’t n-“ but she cut herself short when Tenzin sent her a look.

“Yeah ok. I do need help..” Lin sighed.

“It’s a flu. Nothing terrible, but serious enough that it is important you stay in bed for the next few days and break that fever.” He answered gently and Lin nodded, her usual stubbornnessgone. If he still had had any doubt, _that_ would have confirmed one hundred percent that she was ill.

“I’m going to make you some vegetable broth now in the kitchen. If there is anything...” he looked around the room to find a way in which she could call him.

“I’ll bend a rock in the kitchen.” Lin supplied. “I can still bend and I know this house and it’s structures by heart.”

Tenzin nodded with a small smile. “Alright.”

As he set to work on making the broth, Lin didn’t call him however. And when he returned upstairs, he saw it was because she had gone back to sleep. 

It was a light sleep however. Because she woke up again when she heard him placing the soup next to her on the night stand. 

“You’re still here?” She asked confused. “What time is it?”

“Only 5pm.” He smiled. “I made you some broth like I said I would.”

The confusion didn’t quite leave Lin’s face, but she did move to sit up, helped by Tenzin who placed some pillows behind her back before handing her the soup.

He watched her as she ate, tousled hair, pale skin but red cheeks from the fever. 

“Don’t stare at me like that. I look like shit.”

He chuckled. “I didn’t know Lin Beifong cared about what she looked like to others.”

“She does when she is a sweaty, germ-infested mess.” Lin countered but with a small smile as she ate her soup. “This is really good. Thank you.”

Tenzin nodded before taking the finished plate from her. 

“I have to go back to Air Temple Island now. But I made you a fresh pot of hot tea. It is here next to you on the night stand, next to a pitcher with water. Please make sure that you drink enough. Downstairs in the fridge is more soup, you can warm some tomorrow yourself. But I will stop by in the afternoon in any case to check on you.”

“You d-“

“I _do_ , Lin.” He cut her off. “I - I hope you can consider me a friend again. But even if you didn’t, the fact remains that you moved to a new city, away from your friends. So I am your support system now.” 

Lin looked at him at that with studying, tired eyes. “Of course you are a friend...” she then said eventually before moving to lie down again.

“Try to get some sleep.” Tenzin said softly as he pulled the covers over her before turning to leave the room again.

As he did, his eye fell on a couple of photographs at her vanity, tucked under the frame of the mirror. There were several of Jun, and of her friends in Fire Fountain City. There was one of her, Su, Izumi and Kya. And then, barely visible because it was covered by other pictures- though he would recognise it anywhere - was a photo he knewdepicted Lin and himself at twenty years old at the Yue fest. Dressed in kimonos, both of them unaware a photo was being made as they were looking at one another with love and happiness in their eyes.

Tenzin suddenly felt a jolt of pain run from his stomach to his heart as he thought about that moment and the fact that she still had that picture. She still held on to parts of that past, just like he did. How could they not? It had been such a big part of their lives for so long, and there was Jun - and then he had gone and ruined it all.

He shook his head as he left the mansion. ‘Of course you are a friend’, she had said. Well, there wasn’t very much ‘of course’ about it, if you asked him. Lin was too good for him, too forgiving and too kind. The least he could do was look after her now.  


..

In the end he went to Lin two more days, before on the third day, she had stood in front of him on the island. 

Her skin was still pale, the bags under her eyes were still there and she looked a little thinner too, but her eyes were focused again, the fever induced redness of her cheeks was replaced with a more healthy glow, and her cold had disappeared as well. She was better. 

Pema quickly invited her in, as it was a rather cold day outside. And to Tenzin’s surprise, Lin accepted the invite for a cup of tea, whereas usually she would decline. 

Jun happily jumped in her mother’s arms upon seeing her. Asking with a concerned look on her face if she was better again.

“Of course I am, Pebble. It was just a little flu, don’t you worry.” Lin smiled.

That seemed to satisfy Jun, and soon she was back to playing with her siblings in the other room.

As soon as she was gone, Pema turned to Lin while handing her a cup of tea over the kitchen counter she was sitting at. “Not to insult you, Lin, and I wouldn’t want to overstep..but it seems to have been a pretty heavy flu rather than a little one. From what I’ve heard from Tenzin, I mean. Do you..do you have enough ingredients and groceries at home to cook tonight? It is important to regain your strength quickly. You are more than welcome to stay for dinner, although I can also imagine you may just want to go home and spend time with Jun.”

Tenzin subconsciously held his breath as Pema finished speaking and he was waiting for Lin’s response. The two women got along civilly up to now, but Lin didn’t like people minding her business, and even if she _did_ allowed it, Pema wasn’t a likely candidate to belong to the limited list of people she allowed to fret over her.

He saw how the earthbender’s eyes narrowed as they studied his wife. Tenzin saw apprehension there but also confusion, expressed as well by the slight crease between her eyebrows as she frowned. 

Then her face relaxed, and all of a sudden she smiled a reserved but grateful smile. “You know, that would actually be very nice. You are right in that that flu took me down much more than I anticipated.”

Pema let out a laugh in relief and surprise over Lin’s reaction. “Alright then. I’ll head out to get the ingredients from the cellar then.”

Lin turned towards Tenzin as soon as Pema had left the kitchen. “Tenzin, thank you for helping me the past couple of days. You didn’t have to do that, but I am very grateful you did. I was pretty out of it, walked around with that flu for far too long before my staff almost forced me to go home.”

The expression on her face was serious but Lin’s green eyes shone with gratefulness and something new that Tenzin hadn’t seen in them whenever she looked at him in a long time, _appreciation_. 

Tenzin shook his head, brushing off the gratitude. “It was nothing, Lin. Of course I would help you when you’re sick.”

Lin gave a nod, her eyes warm. “Yes, well...I am still grateful. You could have caught the flu yourself, or pass it on to your family.”

“Yes, but we would have had each other to look after one another. I wasn’t just going to let you deal with it alone, Lin. Not with your friends and the rest of the family far away.” 

He cringed inwardly as he said “rest of the family”. He saw Lin as family again, it had grown on him like that, but he wasn’t sure if Lin did. He saw her eyebrows raise for a split second at his choice of words but she didn’t comment on it. Instead she just sent him a quick smile. “Well, that’s the thing. I am not so sure the Tenzin of the past would have reasoned that way. You truly changed..”

He was taken aback by that. Of course he would have come to her aid in the past as well..or at least he hoped he would... The smirk she sent him as she got up from the stool at the kitchen counter to hang up her coat told him that, although she may be really feeling that way, she was also just teasing him a little 

Sending her a grin of his own he said “Well, the Lin of the past probably wouldn’t even have accepted any help. You have changed too.”

“Touché.” She laughed before leaving the kitchen. Tenzin shook his head with a smile. He was glad he and Lin had reached the point where they could handle a little banter- and that Lin felt well enough again to joke.   


The dinner that evening was a nice and peaceful one. 

Two months later he would think back to that evening, as he attended council meeting after council meeting until deep in the night. As he missed his children, worried about whether they would be fine at the South Pole, with his mother and Kya, but without their parents. As his eyes were trained on Lin on the other side of the table more often than not. Lin, who had still been regaining her strength from the energy draining flu she had beat but had cost her quite some of her body’s reserves and fitness. Lin, who didn’t acknowledge that that meant she was at risk as well. At risk for this strange new flu that was going around and had cost so many to fall ill or worse already...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning:
> 
> As I am imagining LoK as a mixture between roaring twenties and thirties and times before, I am introducing a Spanish flu of sorts in this chapter, as you might have guessed already. I am not basing this off on the current covid crisis nor was that the inspiration for this plot line, but I do understand that it might be triggering for some who have had to deal with covid in one way or another. All I can say, is that it is the Spanish Flu that I will have in mind for the next chapter and that the illness itself won’t feature longer than one full chapter (the next one). It won’t be too detailed (or so I think since I haven’t written it yet) and hopefully not too dramatic. Next chapter I will also include a trigger warning for those who prefer not to read that chapter. And I will write a recap of sorts in the chapter thereafter so that you are still caught up without that one chapter.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> I hope you all had or are having a great Christmas. Here is another long chapter, with a trigger warning for epidemic/ill people. 
> 
> I hope you will like this chapter, although it is a rather sad one. I decided to write the majority of it not from Lin’s POV, so that I could better describe how Lin is holding up in all of this in reality - since we all know that if I had written from Lin’s POV, she would have argued half of the time that she was doing just fine ;-).. 
> 
> Anyways, let me know what you think and what you think happens next ;)? 
> 
> Best,
> 
> Metope

The Gaipan disease - called as such because the first case was established in the small Earth Kingdom village, which was unfortunate in its own right, since the town had only just rebuild itself after having been flooded and washed away from the earth shortly after the hundred year war had ended - didn’t seem to be that much of a problem in its first two months. Yes, there were reports here and there of entire villages getting ill, but it seemed to remain isolated.

Until suddenly cases were reported in several Fire Nation towns, more and more villages in the Earth Kingdom, in Republic City, as well as even at the Eastern Air Temple.  


And the reports were not good. So, as the number of reports increased, so did the frequency and length of the many, many meetings Lin had to attend. Contingency plans had to be drafted, facilities had to make space for the many sick people and even more healers had to be found. A blanket of anxiety and concern seemed to cover the world.

Lin wasn’t afraid of the illness, she wasn’t afraid for herself, nor was she afraid of the sharp criticism of virtually every decision the City and United Council took to manage the disease. What she _was_ afraid of, was the health of her mother and of Jun. Katara was a risk as well, but the virus hadn’t reached the South Pole yet and the United Council was about to take the decision that visiting the North and South Pole would no longer be allowed. The same would be the case for the northern and southern Air Temple, which were both still free of the illness as well.  


Thar meant Katara would be fine, hopefully. But her own mother was a different story. All they knew was that she was somewhere in the swamp. There was no way they would be able to find her if she didn’t want to be found. And she clearly didn’t want to be found, or else she would have shown up already and have gone to stay with herself or Su, or preferably Katara, so Lin reasoned. And then there had been Jun, who was severely at risk with her asthma, since the disease mainly infected the lungs. 

And so, Lin had taken the difficult decision that Jun had to be relocated to stay with her grandmother Katara and Kya at the South Pole. As soon as she had carefully shared this plan with Tenzin the airbender had wholeheartedly agreed and eventually even decided that Jinora, Ikki and Meelo could best join Jun as well. That made the farewell from their parents just a little bit less dreadful, as they at least had one another and would be with their grandmother and aunt. 

It didn’t take away the fact that Jun had cried heart wrenching cries when she had to say goodby to Lin in Republic City - Tenzin would fly the children to the South Pole while Lin and Pema would stay behind, whose children were not faring much better.

Upon his return, Tenzin had told Lin that Jun hadn’t said another word the entire journey, safe for a wobbly I love you when it was time for Tenzin to say goodbye as well.   
The two adults reassured each other that they had taken the right decision, but Lin’s concern and guilt didn’t diminish until she received the first letter from Katara saying the children of course missed them, but were doing fine.

Those events had taken place three months ago. Since then, Lin had written to Jun nearly every day, it didn’t matter how tired she was or how late it was, she made sure to write a letter every other day. And occasionally, she would receive one from Jun herself in return. Her daughter had learned how to write, and her scribbled, wrinkled letters filled Lin with love and heartache at the same time. 

Ironically, her job kept her from dwelling too long on how much she missed her daughter. By now, Kya had also returned from the South Pole to help treat the sick, arguing that fifteen year old Korra and some of the other men and women of the Southern Water Tribe were powerful and responsible enough to keep the Tribe safe and they needed her more here. Lin couldn’t say she was wrong about that.

They worked almost day and night. As ambassador of the Fire Nation, at first, Lin had been working tirelessly on getting all Fire Nation citizens living in Republic City back to the Fire Nation as borders closed in an attempt to limit migration. That also meant that, since Izumi could no longer travel, Lin was now also tasked with representing the Fire Nation at the negotiation table of the United Council in Republic City as the four nations discussed how to best combat the disease together. Then, in her spare time, she helped out where she could in thinking up solutions for every new challenge or problem that presented itself.

Lin carried on like that for four months. And then Baatar had called. His voice tired and timid, but filled with worry as he told her that Su had fallen ill several days before, that she had forbid him to tell Lin anything since she had so much to worry about already, but things had taken a turn for worse and Su was now on her way to the RC Hospital because Zaofu didn’t have enough space anymore, not even for their Matriarch.

From that moment on several hours at Su’s bed were added to Lin’s daily schedule.

..

Tenzin landed with Oogi long after the sun had set. For the past two weeks he had been in the Fire Nation to bring necessary supplies to the hospitals there and to take stock of the situation over there and talk with the officials at the Palace.  


On Oogi he was virtually the only one right now who could travel without the risk of contracting the virus during his travel. As long as he felt well and didn’t contract the virus anywhere on the ground, he thus was the one designated at delivering classified messages and crucial equipment in person that could not be transmitted otherwise.

Despite it being close to midnight, the house on Air Temple Island was still alive and busy as he entered. His wife was stirring in a big pan of soup while the exhausted faces of Kya and Bumi greeted him from the kitchen table.

He was too tired to properly greet them. Falling down on a free chair and thankfully taking the bowl of soup from his wife moments later as she joined them for a long overdue dinner.

Only once he had finished two bowls did he feel like he had enough energy to carry a conversation in the first place.

“How many?” _Ill and deceased,_ was the unspoken ending of that sentence.

He saw Kya tighten her grip around her spoon, as he asked this. He _had_ to ask the question, despite knowing that she would take the numbers as a personal failure.

“The hospital is nearing its capacity limit. And today alone we had to perform the passing rites for ten people again.” Bumi said eventually, his voice void of its usual liveliness and optimism.

Tenzin’s eyebrows raised in surprise at that. “Are you sure? That- that’s a lot.”

Bumi nodded sombrely. “Lin has come up with a more efficient way to keep track of the numbers. So we know for sure these are the correct numbers.”

Tenzin nodded before looking at Kya. “I heard from Izumi that Su has also been admitted a week ago. How is she doing?”

Kya shrugged, a bitter look on her face. “Suyin is strong. She is still fighting it and the symptoms are relatively mild on her. But she is still quite sick. And her husband couldn’t even come with her as he has to look after their kids back in Zaofu. At least Lin is there every moment she can. Still no word of Toph..”

Again, Tenzin nodded. Pema had quietly got up and started collecting the bowls. “Thank you for the meal, dear.” He thanked her. “It is important we eat healthily so that we can keep going. This vegetable soup was just what we needed.”

Pema nodded. “You’ll have to thank Lin, she stopped by earlier today with groceries and fresh vegetables.”

Tenzin frowned a little at that. “I see...” he mumbled, making a mental note to ask about that later. First he had to know what the United Council  had been up to in his absence as Bumi had filled in for him.

As Bumi filled him in, Tenzin couldn’t help but notice how often Lin featured in his stories about both the Republic City Council and the United Council. She had made sure both bodies wouldn’t drift away in endless bureaucratic discussion but actually got things done.

“Lin did all that hm?” Tenzin asked when Bumi had finished, and he said it loud enough so that the others shifted their attention to him again. “Looks like Lin has been doing a pretty good job at looking after everything and everyone those past two weeks...Might I ask who has been looking after her in the past few weeks?”

It was quiet for a while, and Tenzin’s stomach dropped. Silence had been the only thing Tenzin had hoped not to hear as an answer to his question.

“Sounds to me like she improved the administration of the hospital, looked after Suyin, made sure all of us stay healthy and strong, and went well beyond what is expected of her as ambassador in both the RC council and the UC. But last time I checked there are only 24 hours in a day..”

“Well, “ Bumi started, “I had all these council meetings, which was all new to me, so I just...”

“I spent nearly all my time in the hospital...” kya added.

“Baatar is stuck in the Earth Kingdom, and I have been here working on changing Air Temple Island into a second infirmary...” Pema added.

Tenzin sighed, rubbing his hand over his face. “You do know that if Lin had reasoned that way, none of the things I just mentioned would have happened, right?” And then with a little more force. “I can’t believe we are about to make the same mistake here _again_. Haven’t we learned from before? Lin won’t ask for help, she will just give her all, to help those she cares about. We mustn’t take that for granted!”

They all just stared at him.

“You are right...” kya eventually sheepishly reacted.

“ _Yeah_.” Tenzin bit out before sharply turning around and stalking to the door.

“Tenzin, where are you going? It’s late!” Pema called after him. But he didn’t answer, too tired and disappointed in that moment.

He found Lin where he expected to find her, next to Suyin’s hospital bed. She got up from her chair as soon as she saw him, casting a quick glance at her sister as if to make sure she was still doing the same as a second before, and then she made her way towards Tenzin, who had remained waiting for her on the hallway that was nearly completely empty at this hour.

Lin didn’t look well. Red rimmed eyes, hollow cheeks and pale skin framed dull jade eyes. Her movements were slower and less precise than he was used to from her and her lips were twisted in a permanent downward slope.

“You’re back.” She whispered, stating the obvious.

He nodded. “I am so sorry about your sister, Lin. How is she doing?”

Like Kya had done, Lin shrugged. “She has been fighting. But it is taking her a long time. The doctors say the fever has to break in the next 48 hours or it won’t look good.”

He nodded as he took in her words. The past few months had hardened them both, they now processed this kind of information as cold facts almost, rather than information about someone they both cared about.

“And how are _you_ holding up?”

She shrugged, shoulders squaring. “I’m as fine as is possible right now.”

“Are you?” He pressured. “I was just home and as the others filled me in on what happened, I couldn’t help but notice how you featured in all of their stories. You have been helping us all out a lot... but I wonder if you have been looking after yourself too, Lin.”

She turned her head away from him as he said this.

“Please don’t take this the wrong way, Lin, but you don’t look good. You look exhausted. And I -“

“Please don’t.” She cut him off, her voice sharp but she refused to meet his gaze. “I am not your wife, so please just let me handle things my way.”

Tenzin frowned confused. “This has nothing to do with our past or with Pema for that matter, Lin.” He countered. “I care about you, as a _friend_. You helped all of us out, and we threatened to take it for granted again. I am here to make sure that we don’t. That we look after you too.”

Lin just shrugged again, crossing her arms.

“Come on, Lin!” He now said in a more stern voice. “You _have_ to look after yourself, and if you don’t, let others do so for you. What am I going to tell Jun or your mother if something happens to you? “Sorry, she was a hero looking after everyone but she didn’t look after herself so that is why she is gone now’!?”

He knew it was a harsh thing to say, but it was a scenario he was seriously fearing and he felt like it might be the only thing he could say to get through to Lin, or at least get a reaction out of her. Especially since it was clear to him that she had completely shut her own emotions and needs down in order to be able to deal with the reality around her.

It did the trick, as she angrily whipped her head back to look at him, eyes seething with anger. “Don’t you _dare_!” She hissed. “Don’t you dare using my mother or Jun against me like that.”

Tenzin sadly shook his head. “I am not using anyone against you, Lin. I just want you to allow someone, _anyone_ to look after you. If not me, then someone else. You can’t go on like this. I- for a moment I didn’t even recognise you just now, so thin and with slumped shoulders..”

He seemed to get through to her a little more with every word. And as he finished speaking, her lower lip wobbled as she bit down on it in attempt to keep herself together, arms wrapped around her waist.

Knowing her like he did, he pulled her with him to the storage room next to the infirmary. Closing the door behind them he leaned casually against it as she stood in the middle of the room.

“You can let go, Lin.” He said softly. “No one will see or hear or know but for me.”

He caught her gaze, calm grey eyes looking into her green ones, now swimming with unshed tears already.

“I won’t tell a soul.” He promised.

That seemed to do it. And after the first tear fell, a second quickly followed as a strangled sob escaped her lips. 

What he hadn’t expected was for her to move towards him in one big stride, resting her forehead against his shoulder as she sought comfort, tears now freely falling.

Somewhat awkwardly at first, he wrapped his arms around her trembling frame. It soon felt familiar again however to hold her like that, an odd sort of muscle memory taking over as he held her while she cried, accompanied by the occasional sob of how unfair all of this was and how tired she was.

When her tear subsided, she moved away from him as abruptly as she had stepped towards him. A light blush of embarrassment coloring her cheeks as she first looked down at her feet and then at him. “Thank you..” she whispered, her voice hoarse and her eyes still so incredibly sad. “I- you must be tired as well. I didn’t even ask you about how your trip was.”

Tenzin sent her a smile. “That’s for later. How about you go home and try to get some sleep now.”

But Lin shook her head. “No, I promised Baatar there always would be something with Su. I can’t leave her, I haven’t been home in days.”

Tenzin swallowed. It was even worse than he thought.

“Lin, please, go home and get eight hours of sleep. I will stay with Su instead.”

“But if something happens..”

“I will come and get you or ask someone to do so instantly.

She looked at him hesitantly. “With any change at all? For better or for worse?”

He nodded seriously. “I promise. You can trust me. I won’t leave her side. I will send a wire to Pema right away to tell her I am staying here tonight and as soon as I’m back I will take your place and you can get some rest.”

It seemed as if the solution he offered her and the tear she shed suddenly put a stop to the adrenaline she had been running on and he saw her seeking support from the wall, caused by the exhaustion she was clearly experiencing.

“Alright then.” She sighed.

He nodded and knew he should leave to send the wire now, but something about Lin’s expression made him wait. When she spoke again, he was proven right in following his instinct to stay a little longer.

“In four months, Jun turns eight years old.” Lin whispered, her eyes trained unseeingly on the door behind him. “I will have missed seven months of her life. I have never been away from her for longer than a week. And now I’ll have missed seven months and probably more.”

He nodded sadly. “I missed Meelo turning five and Jinora turning 11. And for Jun and Ikki I missed those months in which they shed those last hints of the toddlers they once were to become true seven- and soon eight year olds in their own right. It...it’s just not fair.”

“No, it isn’t.” Lin agreed.

They stood there in what could almost be described as a comfortable silence if the situation hadn’t been so dire.

Eventually, Tenzin reached for Lin’s shoulder and gave it a soft squeeze in support. “I’ll go and send that wire real quick.”

When he returned moments later to the infirmary he saw to his relief that Lin had packed her things already and was waiting for him. She hadn’t changed her mind then.

“Oh and Lin..” he called after her as she headed to the exit and he sat down on the quite uncomfortable wooden chair next to Suyin’s bed. “Please _really_ go to sleep when you’re home. Paperwork can wait.”

A guilty look crossed her face before she smiled at him and nodded. “You are right.”  
  


When he saw Lin the next day, she didn’t look much better, but she at least didn’t look like she would fall over like piece of cardboard hit by a gust of wind. 

They carried on like that for two more days, Lin keeping up her impossible schedule and Tenzin trying to relief her of some of her duties where he could. But then Pema started coughing and soon after she was in bed with a fever, while Kya tended to her almost exclusively night and day - guiltridden and convinced she had brought the illness to the island despite Bumi and Tenzin’s insistence that it could have been them as well, and that all of them, including Pema, had always known this was a risk.

So Tenzin tried to divide his attention between his duties, Pema and Lin where possible.By then, they had changed the acolyte dormitories for the larger part into extra infirmary places. The area was completely off limits for anyone other than healers, meaning not even family could visit. They brought Pema there as it made sense, but it also meant Tenzin couldn’t visit her anymore.

In the evenings it was just him and Bumi now, as Kya slept in the dormitories as well. It was on one of those nights that Lin called him, her voice a little lighter than he had heard it in ages as she told him that Su’s fever had broken a few days ago and that she was doing much better already. It was followed by an immediate apology for her cheerfulness while his wife was still fighting the disease, but she also tried to comfort him by pointing out that cases like Su proved that there was a good chance that if the illness remained mild, Pema would recover.

“Thank you, Lin. I am happy to hear Suyin is awake and doing better.” He had said. “Will you go home now and get some sleep yourself too?”

It had stayed silent on the other side of the line for a moment until Lin sighed a “yes, you are right. Good night Tenzin..”

“Goodnight Lin.”

The following morning he woke up early, the sun was barely out yet, by the sound of pots and pans being moved in the kitchen. He was out of bed in an instant, with Pema not there, who was in the kitchen then?

As he got downstairs he saw it was Bumi who was attempting to make pancakes and eggs for breakfast. With the emphasis on attempting.

“I didn’t think we had any eggs left. Let alone blueberries.” Tenzin frowned.

“Hey little brother.” Bumi greeted him. “You’re right, we didn’t.But Lin stopped by with groceries, so I promised her pancakes for breakfast.”

At that Tenzin looked around if he saw Lin anywhere.

“No she isn’t here. Today is for practicing. Tomorrow is when she is stopping by. Suyin is ready for her recovery trajectory and I told her to bring Su here. This house is the best flu proof area we can make for her. I’ll stay on one side of the house with you, and she can have the other half after we thoroughly cleaned it and you blew some gusts of wind through it.” Bumi rambled and Tenzin just felt himself nod mechanically as his mind tried to figure out how all of this could have been decided already so early on the day.

“I’m...going to check how Pema got through the night.” He said eventually before heading out for the dormitories.

Once there, he saw his wife through the open window. To his surprise she was awake and even waved at him when she saw him.

“Pema! You’re awake! I am so happy!” He exclaimed as he stopped in front of the window but with enough distance between them.

His wife, although still looking frail and sick, smiled at him. “I feel better. And I have missed you.”

He nodded, eyes softening. “I missed you too. It hasn’t been easy not being able to visit you, even though you were asleep. Has Kya or another healer been by to examine you yet?”

She shook her head. “Kya will come in a bit. But I feel much better. I think I beat the flu already.”

He smiledat her as relief settled in his stomach. “The kids will be so relieved as well when I tell them.”

Just then Kya approached the window as well. “Alright, little brother. I’m going to examine your wife, see if she really beat the illness with flying colours as it seems. So time for some privacy. If everything goes to plan you’ll be able to have her in your arms again in no time.” Kya joked gently and Tenzin gave a nod as Kya moved to close the window and the curtains. 

Later that day he heard that Kya wanted to keep Pema for observation for two more days. If her situation remained stable or improved she would be able to go home after that.

Two days seemed a lot, but the day and the larger part of the next morning flew by as he and Bumi started to prepare the house as a recovery home for Suyin and now also for Pema.

Suyin arrived with the ferry of one o’clock, just like Lin had informed him. To his surprise however, Toph accompanied her two daughters as well. Over her mouth and nose she had a piece of fabric. 

“Lin, Su, how are you feeling?” He greeted, and the younger Beifong nodded in return. “Not great, but getting there.” Su smiled weakly.

“We’ll get you there in no time.” Tenzin smiled softly before directing his attention to Toph. 

“Aunt Toph, it is good to see you. I hope you are doing good in these times.” He greeted.

The old woman nodded curtly as they started to make their way back to the house. Tenzin offering to take over pushing Su’s wheelchair from Lin, but the latter of course refusing despite the way her arms trembled, as Tenzin noticed with slight worry. 

“They finally let me through the border.” Toph grumbled. “I wanted to come as soon as I heard Su had fallen ill, but apparently not even being part of Team Avatar gets you past the border now. I had to wait out a two week quarantine and then had to wait til the next moment when they would open the border. It is ridiculous.- I heard your wife fell ill as well?”

Tenzin nodded. “Yes, but she is doing much better. She will probably join Su to recover tomorrow.”

“That’s good. We need to separate those who haven’t had the illness and those who are resistant, from those who are ill. We have been too easy in that department. I thought about it while in my swamp, and it is the swamp that made me realise it. Plants contract viruses through their roots. If you want to prevent everyone from getting sick, you have to isolate the ones who already are. Our nose and mouth are our roots, so we need to protect them better.” Toph explained, point at the fabric covering her nose and mouth. “We need to be cleaner. And we need to isolate.”

Tenzin nodded. “That sounds very logical, aunt Toph.”

Toph nodded again. “Of course it does. Now it is important you lot get this up and running as soon as possible to end this mess.”

At that he saw Lin whipping her head to her right to look at her mother. Her eyes were red rimmed, Tenzin made a mental note to talk to her later in private and tell her to get some more sleep, especially now that Toph was here.

“We are doing the best we can, mother!” The metalbender bit through gritted teeth.

“Especially Lin has been doing an incredible job.” Tenzin came to her aid.

At that Toph grumbled something nearly unintelligible, that sounded a lot like “Yeah, at what cost”, if Tenzin had to guess.

Having arrived at the house, Lin and Toph went to get Suyin installed with help from Bumi as Tenzin moved to check on the latest news on his wife.

As Kya met him at the door, his already overactive brain added another point of attention to the already long list: his sister seemed to be looking more after others than after herself as well.

He was struck by the dullness of her otherwise deep blue eyes as her face had a permanently sad expression.

“I’m so sorry, Tenzin..” she started, and his breath hitched at her words.

“What!? What do you mean? Is she -“ he asked alarmed but Kya quickly interrupted him.

“ _No_ \- no, she isn’t- no. Sorry. I wasn’t clear. Pema is still here, but she isn’t doing as well as I had hoped. She had a little bit of a fever again this morning so I can’t release her yet.”

Disappointment settled in his stomach. “I understand. It’s only for the best.”

His sister nodded. “She is asleep now. So I think it is best to let her sleep.. again, I’m sorry..”

He nodded mechanically before turning around. He was about to make his way back to the house when he suddenly decided to turn right at the crossroads, to his meditating spot. 

He needed a moment to recollect himself, and back at home that wouldn’t be possible.

Meditation did him well under the circumstances. And when he resumed his way home twenty minutes later, the frustration and worry over Pema seemed less all consuming.

The relative peace of mind he had found disappeared in an instant again however, when in the distance he saw Lin walking from the house, then standing still, then seeking support from a nearby tree, then slumping against it as her knees hit the ground.

He let out an involuntary cry as he saw it happening. Bending the air behind him he ran towards her as fast as he could.

His cry had called the attention of Bumi and Toph as well as they came running out of the house but he reached her faster.

“No, no, no, no! _Lin_!” He called out feverishly as he reached her unconscious form. Her chest was heaving and her breathing sounded much like Jun’s when she had an asthma attack. Only this wasn’t asthma, that much was clear to the airbender.

He had her lifted in his arms in an instant and gasped at how much lighter she felt from what he remembered. He had tried so hard to get her to take better care of herself without hovering too much or invading her privacy. But he had clearly failed.

She didn’t respond to his calling her name, nor to Bumi’s loud voice. Not even Toph’s more staccato and almost angry voice - caused by her concern - seemed to do the trick.

“I’m bringing her to Kya.” He was already half way down the path back to the dormitories when he heard Bumi calling after him that he could not go there. If he did, he couldn’t get back into the house, nor take care of Pema once she got released and he could get sick himself like this.

“I don’t care!” He called back at them. And as he shot a look over his shoulder he was aware of Toph’s raised eyebrow and an expression that called him out on the facts he knew himself so well: he knew how it looked that he had been accepting of the rules not to enter the dormitory to be with his wife, but he was going to break them now for Lin. And he couldn’t quite explain it. All Tenzin knew in that moment, was that Lin, unbreakable steadfast and headstrong Lin Beifong, was lying limp in his arms. There was so much wrong about that image, that it felt as if someone had placed an enormous weight on his chest, preventing him from breathing properly, from thinking properly. It scared him like nothing had scared him in a very long time. All that mattered now was getting Lin back to health. He was acting on instinct and pure adrenaline. 

So he looked back at the road ahead and continued his way with Lin in his arms.

“Please hang in there, Linny.”


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, 
> 
> here I am with a new update! Thanks to all who commented on the previous chapter - I felt a little insecure about posting that last chapter as it deals so heavily with the effects of an epidemic and it is quite a twist and nee event in this story. This chapter is about recovery but also deals with a side-character death, though mainly as an event that characters have to deal with than as an actual event. 
> 
> Curious to hear what you think of this chapter!  
> Best,
> 
> Metope

Katara watched as her only firebending grandchild was sitting by herself in the farthest corner of the room, occasionally observing her sister who was closest in age to herself.

She could tell that Ikki knew Jun was looking at her and was purposefully ignoring her, directing all her attention to the game she was playing with her younger brother. Jinora was reading a book in a chair near the fire. Jinora was nearly _always_ reading these days, the stories giving her an escape to what had become a very dark reality lately.

The letter saying Pema had fallen ill was one she had eventually shared with the children when Pema was still ill by the next two letters that followed. Relief among the three airbenders was big when the fourth letter from their father told them their mother was getting better again.

The fifth letter did not contain much information about Pema. Instead it was entirely about Lin - that in itself was not odd, most letters her son wrote revolved around Lin these days, something that confirmed her suspicions that her son still harboured strong feelings for Lin. If only her husband hadn’t put so much pressure on Tenzin....

The fifth letter stood out however, because it said that Lin had fallen ill as well. Up until then, Jun had tried her best to keep her siblings’ mind off their sick mother. But now that her own mother had befallen to same, the young girl didn’t seem to have that strength anymore. Understandably so. So the waterbender had four kids on her hands that would sometimes burst out crying over nothing or have a tantrum, all because of the stress and anxiety they were feeling. 

Then the sixth letter brought the heart breaking news Katara had feared. And as she shared the news with her grandchildren she saw a certain spark leaving the three airbenders, much the same to how that spark had disappeared from her own eyes all those decades ago when her mother passed away. And that may have made her the best person to help them through it, but it didn’t make it easy. She did her best however, tried to include Jun as well. The firebender now had a permanently haunted expression on her face, as she seemed to be expecting that the next letter would hold the same information for her mother.

But the seventh letter came, and it did not contain the news they feared. Lin didn’t seem to be doing better, but she wasn’t doing worse either as Tenzin wrote that the doctors thought that the state Lin was in, at this point had less to do with the Gaipan disease, and more to do with the earthbender having thoroughly exhausted her body.

At the South Pole, things had become tended in the meantime. Until Ikki exploded, letting out all her frustration and anger and pain over the loss of her mother. It was good that it happened. It was definitely not good that it had been Jun who was on the receiving end.

“Just go away, Jun! It is not fair. Why is _my_ mom dead and _yours_ still alive!! Why isn’t it the other way around!”

“ _Ikki_!” Jinora, having turned eleven two months ago but no longer a child anymore, was quicker than Katara in calling her sister out on her words.

“ _What_!?” Ikki countered. “First she claims our dad, now she still has a mom and we do not!”

“Aunt Lin is very ill too. This isn’t easy on Jun either! Besides, Jun did not claim dad, and you can’t compare this anyways. It’s different for Jun. We still have dad - and Jun does too, but with her mom it’s just...different.” Jinora tried to explain and despite the seriousness of the moment Katara’s heart warmed at how Jinora clearly understood so well that the place Lin and Tenzin held in Jun’s life were simply not the same - not yet anyways.

“It’s okay, Jinora.” Now came Jun’s soft reply. Her green eyes wide but also hardened and hiding how she truly felt. Instead there was a look of understanding on her face. “I think maybe I would have felt the same if it had been the other way around.”

That was all Lin, Katara thought, hiding away her own feelings to accommodate the other.

“Ikki,” she now spoke. “I think I want to to go for a little walk, are you joining me?”

“No!” The girl sulked.

“Well, let me rephrase. You _are_ joining me.”

At that Ikki quickly jumped up and went to get her coat. Katara smiled, she still had it.

Then Jun drew her attention. “I’m sorry grandma Katara. Please don’t be angry with Ikki. I am sure she didn’t mean it.”

“I know, dear. I am not angry with her. Not with any of you.” She promised and that seemed to comfort Jun.

When she returned later after a good conversation with Ikki, she found Meelo asleep and Jinora and Jun playing children’s pai sho. They would be alright, these four kids, just like she and Sokka had been. 

..

As long as Lin was still in the dormitories, and Su was still gaining strength, neither Su nor Toph was allowed to be with her.Toph had been right in saying they had to be more strict in isolating the sick from the healthy. It took a few weeks, but slowly but steadily the number of cases started to drop. Soon the approach was adopted by all the nations while healers and gurus worked tirelessly on finding a cure.

That left Kya and now also Tenzin to care for Lin and Pema both. It also had meant virtually everyone was angry with Tenzin now, for under the new rules, he could not leave the dormitory, could not attend council meetings unless he would first quarantine for at least fourteen days, and thus Bumi had to cover for him. Which was good for no one.

Tenzin seemed to be ignoring it all however, instead splitting every time he had between his wife and Lin.   


And then the unthinkable happened.

And in the end, it was the unthinkable that made them decide to get Lin out and back into the house. Because Tenzin needed to be looked after. Not for his physical well-being, but for his mental health. And if they would bring Lin to the house, Tenzin would follow, as there now was no else anymore in the dormitories but her to keep him there. 

For Lin, there was virtually no risk of contagion anymore. The healers said she seemingly was past the worst of the disease, but her body was nowhere near recovery and still completely exhausted from the neglect Lin had put herself under. Toph remained on one side of the house now with Tenzin after his quarantine, trying to help him through his grief in any way she knew. Su now was the one tending to Lin. Having had the disease already made it unlikely she would catch it again. 

So now roles were reversed. And Suyin couldn’t help but wonder if Lin had felt the same tending to her as she did now: chest constricting at the sight of her sister’s unconscious form, feeling a constant mixture of fear and tears that were ready to fall at any minute.   


It’s true that as the days passed, her breathing became less laboured and her fever dropped until she was quite literally “just asleep”. But that didn’t take away any of the concern Su was feeling.

After a week she and her mother reversed roles, which was a great advantage for Tenzin too who, if Su had to guess, wouldn’t have been able to deal much longer with her mother’s difficult character while going through his own grief. Su kept to her side of the house, even though it wasn’t entirely necessarily anymore to keep sides now as long as Bumi stayed isolated - Tenzin still wasn’t going anywhere anyways. He was preparing a funeral and for the return of his children, safe for her own niece. 

They had decided that, as there were no underlying conditions for the three airbenders as far as they knew of, and they seemed to get a better grip on the virus anyways, it would be best to get the kids so that they could be there at the funeral of their mother.

They all attended the funeral but for Lin and Toph, who didn’t want Lin to be alone. But Su knew it also had to do with the fact that she had never truly forgiven Pema for working herself between Lin and Tenzin, making use of Tenzin’s weaknesses. Toph was quite convinced that, if Pema hadn’t been there to push exactly those of Tenzin’s buttons that increased his anxiety over duty and rebuilding a legacy, things might have gone very differently. Su couldn’t disagree.

So she attended the funeral on behalf of all the Beifongs. Upon her return she found her mother asleep in the chair next to Lin, while somewhat cradling her daughter’s hand. It was the most affectionate she had seen her mother since Lin and she were both adults and she quietly left them, not wanting to disturb the moment that Lin would not remember a thing about, but which would mean a lot to Toph.

The following days were now filled with keeping three airbending kids under control - as the only handful of acolytes left on the island were still working in the dormitories - while Tenzin slowly started taking on his duties again.

Lin had been asleep now for a month. Exhausted chi and chakra’s were to thank for that, according to Kya, but it still seemed terribly unnatural to Su, especially with the tube going into Lin’s arm to reassure she would get the nutrition and fluids she needed, and she hoped her sister would wake up soon.

They now all tended to Lin a few hours a day.If it was up to Tenzin he would spent the entire night watching her too. It seemed that after his loss, he had all his hope fixated on Lin recovering. 

Toph mocked him for it. A coping mechanism. The frown that usually was there on her mother’s face anyways seemed to grow deeper and deeper with the passing days. Beifongs did not speak about their emotions, kept their feelings to themselves, and so Su felt herself completely incapable of addressing the situation of Lin’s health towards her mother.   


Meanwhile, Su was having her own struggles as well, having been away from her family and her city for a long time now. There was no question about her staying put however as long as Lin wasn’t awake yet, but that didn’t mean that it was any easier. 

More often than not she found herself next to Lin’s bed, whispering to her sister to please get better and wake up soon.

..

Lin drifted in and out of consciousness several times. Sometimes her thoughts were almost coherent - like the time she thought she heard Tenzin begging her to pull through because he couldn’t lose her too, which made her wonder who else he had lost. Other times she just heard voices, felt light beam against her closed eyelids. In all cases she felt too tired to open her eyes and in all cases she succumbed to sleep or unconsciousness rather quickly again. 

The first time she managed to open her eyes, it was to yellow and orange fabric. As soon as her consciousness was being noticed, a large hand was placed on her cheek in a somewhat caressing motion before the hand pulled back again. Grey eyes swimming with emotions but framed by dark circles locked with her own. The words his lips spoke she didn’t register. It was too much. She managed to give him a small smile before her eyes fell shut again.

The second time she opened her eyes, she also groaned in discomfort as her throat felt incredibly dry. A glass of water was immediately placed at her lips as a strong arm helped her up a little so she could drink.

When she had enough, the glass was taken away and she was pulled into a hug by strong arms. Against her usual instincts she let herself be held, feeling somewhat perplexed. And her astonishment only grew when she slowly started to register it was no one other than her sister holding her. Hadn’t it been the other way around?- Lin thought.

“I am so happy you woke up. I missed you so.” Her sister sobbed.

Lin wanted to say something, but she found herself still too tired to do so. And what surprised, and also scared her even more, was the fact that she was willing to surrender to that feeling of exhaustion and weakness.

Su seemed to notice her still present exhaustion too. “Don’t try to speak, Lin. Just...rest more, regain your strengths. We’ll be here, and when you wake up maybe we can see if you can hold some food down.”

It made her wonder how long she had been asleep for spirit’s sake. Before she could ponder on that question much longer she drifted back to sleep again.

The third time, she woke up because she heard two male voices, one raised and not far from her bed.

“She was my _wife_ , of course I _miss_ her, of course I _loved_ her, of course I - the grief - I - how can they even suggest that I don’t!?”

“Hey don’t shoot the messenger, brother. I just thought you should know.”

“How can the press have become so ruthless. So deceitful and negative?”

“It probably hasn’t gone unnoticed that you have spent so much time looking after Linny over there, and continue to do so.”

A frustrated growl. “What I do in my own time is none of their business. This is the work of the acolytes again. I have let that get entirely out of hand.”

Silence now. “Don’t be too hard on yourself, Ten. Dad caused those acolytes to think they are above everyone else. You are merely experiencing now what Kya and I have had to deal with our entire life.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t see it before. They are loyal to Pema, of course they are. But that must never result in intolerance and interference in my life or in that of Jun or Lin’s or of anyone else for that matter.”

“The important thing is that you see it now. Don’t let it bother you. You have enough on your plate. How - how are you _really_ doing?”

A long sigh, that nearly sounded as exhausted as Lin still felt herself, but also oddly tugged at her heart, giving her the sensation of wanting to comfort him. _Tenzin_.

She could nearly figure out what the previous conversation she had heard was about. But the fog in her mind didn’t want to clear and so she couldn’t quite grasp it. All she gathered was that something terrible had happened and that Tenzin was involved.

The fourth time she woke up the fog was gone. She was suddenly completely aware of her surroundings, of the tubes in her arm, which she immediately moved to frantically pull out. She hissed at the jolt of pain as the needle was released from her arm.

“Hey, hey! Calm down kiddo! Take it easy.” Her mothers voice sounded and strong hands moved to cover her hands.

“Mom..” Lin croaked out, her voice hoarse from lack of use. Turning she looked at her mother’s glazed over eyes, at the mixture of surprise and emotion on her face.

“What happened?” She didn’t know what else to ask, the expression on Toph’s face confusedher as she rarely saw her mother showing this much emotion.

“You were a fool, _that’s_ what happened.” Her mother said, shaking her head and Lin winced a little as she half expected her mother would now go off on one of her tirades on how Lin never did anything right.

Instead however her mother took one of her hands in both of hers, giving it a comforting squeeze. “Don’t _ever_ scare the crap out of us like that again, Lin. I know you always want to come out on top, but staying in an almost comatose sleep of exhaustion for weeks after battling Gaipan disease is _really_ overdoing it.”

Lin frowned at that, processing what her mother was saying. “H-how long was I out?”

“Five weeks.”

“ _What_!?” She gasped, felt dizzy over the shock and started coughing.

“Easy, _easy_..” her mother soothed, bringing her a glass of water to help get the cough done.

Lin’s mind was racing over the information. “How is everyone? Jun? Tenzin? Su?- she has been here before, I remember. Is she ok? Who has been filling in for me? How is fighting the disease going? And - and -“ Suddenly her chest started heaving again as her lungs fought to get the air in and out, the muscles already tired from the exertion of merely speaking.

“Badgermole, stop! This is exactly what got you into this bed in the first place!” Toph now chastised as she pushed her daughter back into the cushions.

Lin huffed, closing her eyes and pressing her fingertips to her forehead as a headache was spreading.

“Su has recovered perfectly, just like you will. Our firebending prodigy is still with her grandmother at the South Pole. The other kids are back here on the island, because...” Toph now paused and Lin knew that what she was about to hear would be the terrible thing she had picked up on previously when she had woken up.

“...Tenzin’s wife..Pema...she did not make it. The disease came back twice as hard after we initially thought she had recovered from it. She passed away a month ago, the funeral was shortly after.”

Lin felt shock wash over her at the news. She hadn’t been friends with Pema, but she had come to respect the woman. “That is- that is _terrible_.” She uttered, then opening her eyes and looking at her mother for her next question. “How are Tenzin and the children under it all?”

Toph grimaced. “He is a shell of his former self.He just went back to taking on his duties, but he is exhausted. He is past the first stages of raw grief but there is still a way to go. And then he has those three kids who are grieving too and the press...isn’t being easy on him either.”

Lin noticed her mother hesitating at those last words and suddenly remembering again the conversation between Bumi and Tenzin she had picked up on before she asked, “Has he been here? I think I remember him being here.”

Toph smiled a lopsided smile at that, “I probably shouldn’t tell you, but, yes. Every day. Even more so in recent days. It seems that now that he had lost his own wife, he was even more determined to get you back to health.”

Suddenly Tenzin’s words rang through her mind again “ _I can’t lose you too”_. Lin nodded.

“Seriously,” Toph continued. “At some point he was more looking after you than after himself. To that extent the two of you are so similar..”

Lin averted her gaze at that. She remembered Tenzin being the one relentlessly looking after her in the days before she had become ill. Pressuring her to eat, drink and sleep enough. She had hardly listened of course, but his attention and the sincerity behind his concern hadn’t gone unnoticed to her.   


And as they had been working together in those days, and as he had become the only one again with whom she felled safe enough to let her walls down, and show her emotions to, it had almost felt the same as before. _Almost_. With the difference that Tenzin had much more eye for the well-being of others, for _her_ well-being now. _Almost_. With the difference that Tenzin was married. No. Had been married- Was now a widower.   


She knew he loved Pema. Maybe his relationship with Pema was different from how their relationship had been, from what she could tell. But he had loved her, in the first place already because she was the mother of his children. _As are you_ \- a little voice in the back of her mind whispered. But the difference was, Tenzin hadn’t _known_ that for a long time, she had made sure of that, hadn’t she?

“Lin? Earth to Lin...are you alright?” Her mother’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. 

“You okay?”

The younger woman nodded.

“Now that you pulled those tubes out of your arm, I’ll go and see if we can get you something to eat.” Toph said. “You stay right where you are, you hear me?”

Lin nodded obediently, suddenly feeling like a child again.

As she waited for her mother to return, she briefly closed her eyes but soon noticed another pair of feet entered the room.

“Tenzin.” She whispered before opening her eyes to look at the tall man. She was shocked at the state he was in. Thinner than she remembered and with bags under his eyes, the grey of which held a deep sadness.

“How are you?” They asked in unison, then both chuckled before growing serious again.

“My mother just told me..I am so, _so_ sorry Tenzin. If there is anything I can do to help...once I am out of this bed..”

He shook his head with a sad smile. “The only way in which you can help me now is by focusing on yourself and on getting better. You had us all so scared, Lin. You had _me_ scared.”

Lin saw something shining in his eyes that she couldn’t quite place. Love? Pain? Desperation? Or maybe all three of them..

“Of course..” she finally nodded.

“How are the kids doing?”

“They are...coping, I think. Meelo has hardly any understanding of what is going on. Keeps asking for his mother. Ikki is emotional. Cries a lot, is angry a lot. But I think that’s good, at least she isn’t bottling up her feelings. I can’t say the same for Jinora. She is keeping everything in, quieter than usual, although her eyes betray her sadness. I tried to get her to talk, as did Bumi, Su and even Toph. But no luck yet. And then there is Jun, who is now all by herself with my mother. Mother doesn’t say it with so many words in her letters, she knows things are tough here, but in between the lines I sense that Jun is having a hard time as well. She is of course...worried about you..and about her sisters..”

“...and about _you_..I imagine.” Lin finished Tenzin’s outpouring of concern for his children. 

Tenzin nodded halfheartedly. “But on the brighter side, the numbers are going down steadily since we started new safety and hygiene procedures and healers in the Northern Water Tribe are apparently close to finding a medicine. We should hopefully be able to have it by the end of this month. If it really works, the world can start its path of recovery in no time, and Jun can come home soon.”

“That would be nice.” It was an understatement.

He nodded. “Yes it would.”

They held each other gaze in a comfortable silence after that. Just taking each other’s appearance in. They both looked terrible, but hopefully things would be better from now on.   
  


The spirit’s knew they both needed it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little note at the end:  
> With regards to Tenzin: I think he would truly grief over Pema, he had a whole life and family with her after all. She may have always in truth have been “second best” to his heart. But that doesn’t mean he could not and did not love her. So yes he is grieving. I don’t want to wallow in it though, but for the story to be realistic grief is part of the narrative. In any case it was in this chapter :)


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year!!
> 
> Sorry for being a little late with this chapter! I was away on a mini vacation within the country for the weekend :).
> 
> I hope you’ll all like this chapter!  
> Best,  
> Metope

Her mother knew how to fly Oogi.  


That was for sure the best kept secret to now be revealed.

Her mother hated all types of flying - she hardly used the cables the way Lin did, to _fly_ , because she wouldn’t be able to see mid-air. 

Moreover, Toph hardly ever mentioned her adventures with Team Avatar - and if she was honest, Lin was glad she didn’t talk a lot about it, the stories made her feel insecure and anxious, feeling like she was a failure, having accomplished close to nothing compared to her mother.

But the scarce times that Toph _did_ mention it, she would not let the chance go by to express her dislike for flying on Appa- although respecting and being grateful for the sky bizon’s efforts itself.

But apparently Toph _did_ know how to fly on the large animals, as long as the animal itself or someone else told her the way. And when Lin thought about it, it made sense. Katara, Aang or Sokka couldn’t always have been with Toph and Appa at the same time, that would have been highly impractical.

So now, Toph was flying Oogi while Lin was making sure they remained on course. If it had been up to her, she would have flown there herself. But in the end she had had to give in to her family who were saying she wasn’t strong enough yet to travel alone.  


She was able to eat proper meals again three times a day now, without her stomach getting upset - unused to processing food after a “break” of five months. She was able to walk again, albeit it not as fast as before - her legs unused to the movement. Her bending was still strong, although less precise. Kya didn’t let her exercise yet, but the waterbender was satisfied with her progress so far. They seemed little things, but it had cost her a whole month of practice to get this far. Lin hated recovery.

  
So yes, she was getting there, had even started some paperwork again, but she definitely wasn’t there yet. Thus, travelling alone was unwise.

And then there was that other matter: she didn’t know how to fly Oogi. Whenever she traveled on Oogi, Tenzin would fly. It didn’t seem all that hard to her, but when they started explaining to her what she should do in cases of heavy rain, snow or a storm, she realised that maybe now was indeed not the time to learn flying a Sky Bizon. 

But Lin was determined to get to the South Pole and finally hold her little girl in her arms again. It had all become possible now that a medicine had been created and successfully distributed in the past month. The end of the crisis was there. Jun had already been vaccinated and since Lin could not catch the disease anymore, it would be safe to collect Jun.

“You’re quiet.”

“What is there to say? It’s just forever straight ahead from here until we see the first icebergs. Or well, until _I_ see them.”

“How are you feeling? Not too cold?”

It was still extremely weird to Lin, this concerned version of her mother. Su had told her that she had rarely seen Toph so concerned and with so much emotion visible to others as when Lin had been ill and Su recovering. And slowly Lin had come to understandthat her mother had been sincere when she had said Lin had scared her. It hadn’t been just a catch phrase. It had been truly how Toph felt.

And when she had carefully shared her confusion over this with Kya, the older woman had nodded and said that she could understand that. Toph liked to be in control of things, and a disease was something she could not control. Well, that made sense.

And thus Lin answered Toph calmly and honestly, where normally, her question would have just irritated Lin. “I’m fine. Tenzin forced me to wear three sweaters and then Kya’s winter coat.” 

“He looked after you again.”

“I wish he also looked more after himself.” She replied and Toph snorted. “Pot calling the kettle black.”

Lin didn’t reply to that, instead steering the conversation away from her and Tenzin. “I talked to Jinora yesterday. She opened up to me a little, but overall she is just very lost still. It’s good Kya has less patients now that the crisis is ending. After she has had the chance to catch her breath, I think it would be good if she talked with Jinora. She is good in those psychological and emotional things. I think it will be good for her too to have Jun back. They are alike a lot.”

“Yes. I think _Tenzin_ will see it that way too. As her _father_ he’ll do what’s best for her.” Toph said and it didn’t go unnoticed to Lin how she emphasised Tenzin. She knew what Toph was getting at.

“Stop it, mother.” She said curtly. “I am allowed to worry a little over Jinora without you or anyone drawing all sorts of conclusions. I like the kid, she is the sister of my daughter and I have lived under the same roof as she for the past four weeks. Nothing more, nothing less.”

Toph nodded. “As long as it really isn’t anything more, you won’t hear anything from me. Just don’t try to fill the void. It will only complicate things.”

“Contrary to popular belief, I am still not that fond of other children just like that. So don’t you worry.” Lin bit back.  


They flew in silence after that.

..

The entire journey in the air, Toph hadn’t been able to sense her daughter’s emotions very well. But as soon as they had landed, she noticed Lin’s heart beating with anticipation as they made their way to Katara who was there waiting or them.

The elder woman greeted them with a hug, despite or maybe _because_ her knowing neither of them was very fond of those.

“Where is Jun? How has she been holding up?”

Katara smiled at that. “She is back home, Korra is with her. I didn’t tell her yet that you were expected to arrive today, in case there would be any delays. She has been on model behaviour though, no tears, no tantrums. But she is so very quiet, turned more inwardly than an eight year old should be.”

Ah yes, Jun was eight now, Toph realised. Her birthday had been only two weeks ago. Lin had been so frustrated that she hadn’t recovered fast enough to get to Jun in time- couldn’t even sent her a proper gift due to travelling and services still interrupted. Standing here now, Toph sensed her daughter’s heart skipping a beat as Katara mentioned Jun’s age. Lin still felt guilty.

“Come. It’s time you two get reunited. We can talk later.” Katara then said and the two women followed the waterbender, Toph holding onto Lin, as she could hardly see anything through the thick layers of snow and ice.

As soon as they entered Katara’s home, warmth spread around them and to Toph’s surprise her feet met earth as soon as she took her boots off.

Noticing her surprise Katara explained. “It isn’t much, but I asked for a path of earth to be created inside so you can see. I’ll clean it out later again.”

“Thanks Katara, that is- that is very kind of you.” Nothing less was to be expected of Katara, but still Toph was struck each times by Katara’s empathy and consideration for others. She wished she had more of it, maybe her own children - especially Lin, the eldest, the first one, with whom she made the most mistakes - wouldn’t have had so many struggles later in life as they had.

At the sound of the voices, Toph now heard a door opening slowly. Two pair of footsteps reminding her of twinkletoes entered. One were clearly belonging to Korra, and it moved Toph to get this close to Aang again after his passing. Her attention moved quickly to the second pair, however, the combination of light-footed steps but with an alert and _usually_ confident imprint on the ground of her granddaughter. Although now, that confidence seemed to be lacking somewhat.

At the same time she felt her daughter’s heartbeat pick up, emotion causing it to beat wildly.

“ _Jun_!”

“ _Mama_!”

They spoke in unison and Lin approached her daughter in two large strides before lifting her in her arms.

Finally they were together again.

Jun hadn’t shed a single tear, Katara had said. Well, now the gates were definitely flooding. Not just by Jun but by Lin as well - a sound and sensation that Toph didn’t experience often. Even as a child, Lin had hardly ever cried.

It strangely warmed her heart to be part of the reunion between mother and daughter. Of the emotion there. The expression of love and trust and heartache.

So different from the relationship she had with her own daughter. It was strange to think that this was one and the same person.

It made Toph feel proud. Her daughters both had become women, benders and mothers greater than she had ever been. Just as she had hoped, but arguably despite her best efforts. That, she regretted.

..

As soon as Jun saw her, Lin noticed her bottom lip started wobbling and in a split second her daughter’s face went from apprehensive and curious, to a combination of happiness and pain, or rather an outpouring of all the held back emotions of the past as she leaped into her mother’s arms with a cried ‘mama’.

And Lin held her, and pulled her as close as she could as tears started rolling down her own cheeks as well. But it didn’t matter. She just held her daughter, burying her face in her daughter’s hair, taking in her familiar smell, feeling her tiny form - although she had grown quite a bit over the year - in her arms. Rubbing soothing circles over her daughter’s back as they cried, Lin silently, Jun loud and nearly hysterically as her hands grabbed fists full of the fabric of her tunic and held on so tightly as if determined to never let go again.

Brushing stray strands of hair out of her daughter’s face she looked her over, over and over again. Taking in familiar eyes, a familiar nose, familiar lips in a familiar face. Yet all of her features were so changed as well. Older, with less innocence in them now. Her observations confirmed in the fact that her daughter’s green eyes, though swimming with tears were looking her over just the same.

“Are you not sick anymore mama?” The unsure question came. “You look...thin.” A frown accompanied her judgement, not meant to hurt, but merely expressing her concern and confusion - still innocent and honest as a child.

Lin pulled her daughter close her again. She couldn’t lie. Not now. “I’m not quite there yet. But I’ll get better.” She promised. “It will all get better now. Now that I don’t have to miss you so, anymore.”

A shuddered breath escaped her as she got up, lifting her daughter along with her. Now looking around the room she saw Katara’s face, full of emotion and her mother with a strange smile on her lips. And then, leaned against the wall next to the door was a gangly teenager looking down at her feet, unsure if she had been allowed to be apart of the moment. The Avatar.

Lin wasn’t sure what gave it away, but the girl reminded her of the kids she counselled back in Fire Fountain City. Kids with a good character, good future ahead, but struggling with insecurity or other demons which they tried to hide by a tough exterior. Korra radiated the same, the reason why quite obvious. Again, she was the avatar.

“It is an honor to finally meet you, Korra.” She spoke, and when the girl looked up in surprise over having been addressed before Katara, Lin sent her an encouraging smile.

Pushing herself away from the wall, Korra approached her. “The honor is mine, miss Beifong. I heard so much about you. And about your work as Ambassador and your role in fighting the Gaipan disease.” Korra replied in genuine admiration. “I wish I could have helped too..”

“I understand you have been a great help for master Katara and for Jun while she was here, taking her mind off everything happening in the world. I am very grateful for that.” Lin replied.

“I practiced firebending with Korra, mama. Uncle Zuko said I am a good trainer for Korra.” Jun now piped up with pride in her voice and Lin chuckled.

“Your uncle knows how to flatter you, that is clear.”

“But it’s true!” Korra now spoke up. “Learning how to firebend on the South Pole isn’t easy. I won’t be starting my firebending training until at least six more months, it got delayed due to the disease. But thanks to Jun I learned a lot! She is really amazing, I can’t do half the things she can do already.”

The teenager’s words were meant as a compliment, and Lin took them as such but she couldn’t quite shake the feeling of unease that washed over her at the same time. Her daughter was only eight, for spirits sake, she wasn’t supposed at all to be more skilled than the teenaged avatar.

Her mother seemed to have sensed Lin’s sudden unease as she joined the conversation. “Well, she is a Beifong, what did you expect?” Toph shrugged. “But how about we move into the dining room. I don’t know about you lot, but I am quite hungry.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea.” Katara nodded. “Why don’t you all head inside. Korra knows where everything is and can get you started on some tea. I want to have a look at Lin.”

Lin turned to Katara with a frown. “Aunt Katara that’s really not necessary.”

Katara gave her a stern look at her objection. “All three of my children wrote me separately to ask me if I would please have a look at you upon arrival. So _yes_ , I definitely do think it is necessary. Forgive me, but you look terrible, Lin. You haven’t done what I asked of you.”

This confused Lin even further. “Which is...”

Katara shook her head. “To look after yourself.” She said in a chastising voice.

“Oh..” Lin uttered sheepishly.

“Yeah, ‘oh’ indeed.” The waterbender said sternly. “So into the healing room with you.”

“I want to stay with mama.” Jun begged when she felt that she was expected to leave as well when Lin put her down.

“Your mom will be back in no time, kiddo.” Toph now said. “Let Sugar Queen look your mom over while you tell me all about your new firebending tricks, hm? I have definitely missed you too, you know?”

Jun seemed to consider Toph’s offer and turned to look apprehensively at Lin. “You’ll be back soon?”

Lin nodded. “Yes, Pebble. You can go with grandma Toph and I’ll be back before you know it.”

That seemed to satisfy Jun as she willingly went with Toph and Korra, after which Lin followed Katara into the healing room.

Now that her journey was over for the moment and she was finally reunited with her daughter again, did Lin feel how truly tired she had become, as she more stumbled than walked towards the healing bath.

Katara observed it with crossed arms and a disapproving look on her face.

“Tenzin tried to tell me to take better care of myself. I didn’t listen.” Lin tried to defend herself and her family, but Katara just shook her head as she set to work.

“You lost a lot of weight.”

“Well, I have been told five weeks of unconsciousness do that to a person.” Lin deadpanned.

“But Lin, how in _earth_ did you let it get that far?!” Katara sighed. 

It was a question asked out of concern for her well-being, but it irritated Lin nonetheless and she snapped. “Well, Lets see. I was living in a city where more and more people were dying every day, the systems weren’t prepared, the medicine wasn’t prepared, then Su got sick but there was no one to look after her but me, then Pema got sick and there was no one to look after Bumi and Tenzin but _me_ , Kya wasn’t faring that much better at that point, so I didn’t have that much of a choice to be honest.”

There was silence as Katara processed. “But _they_ didn’t pass out from exhaustion on top of the disease. And you did..” Katara then eventually countered.

“I didn’t have a _choice_.” Lin repeated stubbornly and she saw Katara shaking her head before looking at her with a mixture of concern and sadness in her eyes. “If you make everything your responsibility, others won’t even have a chance to take some of the burden, Lin.”

“Tenzin tried and helped a lot actually. Until...well, you know...my condolences by the way. I am sorry for not having offered them sooner.”

Katara nodded. “How is my son?” She then asked, and Lin was grateful for the change of subject, Katara’s message had been received by her loud and clear after all.

“He is...doing ok. Under the circumstances. He has taken most of his duties back over from Bumi and is very focused on how the kids are dealing with it. So much so that I sometimes think it is a cover so he won’t have to deal with his own grief too much.” Lin replied. “I try to help him where I can. We all do. But only time can heal the wounds.”

“You are right about that...” Katara said, her voice lingering as she continued scanning Lin’s body and bending water around her temples to alleviate the throbbing headache Lin hadn’t even told the healer she was having.

“I was thinking of going with you on the way back. So I can help Tenzin for a while.” Katara then said.

“What about Korra?” Lin asked carefully. “Is she done with her training here?”

“Kya can finish it. I think it would be good for her to have a few months of calm again.”

“I agree. I haven’t seen many people over the past year work as hard as she did.”

“That’s settled then. We will fly back the four of us once you are up for the journey back.”

Lin wanted to protest and say that they didn’t have to wait on her account. But she knew it would be useless protesting to Katara, so instead she just nodded.

Dinner came next and was a calm affair, with Jun sitting in Lin’s lap as they ate their soup, then falling asleep against her mother soon after. 

Usually Lin would bring her to bed as soon as that happened. But this time she selfishly wanted to keep her daughter close, so she just cradled the girl in her arms as the adults and Korra talked about the past year and about what was still to come.

They all had an early night, planning on starting preparing the next day for the journey back home. However, before Lin could get to doing anything the next day a knock on the door during breakfast and Toph returning with a letter and a grumpy look on her face for being disturbed so early in the morning, turned what was supposed to be a calm day of preparation and spending time with Jun into something quite different.

“It is a telegram, for you.” Katara said upon glancing at the paper in Toph’s hands.

Taking the telegram from her mother, Lin quickly opened it, unsure who would be sending her a telegram here and worrying something might be wrong in Republic City.

The letter came from Fire Fountain City however and its contents caused her heart to skip a beat as she felt herself turn cold from utter shock.

“Spirits, Lin, you’re crying, are you alright?” Katara’s concerned voice came.

Looking up at the sound of the waterbender’s voice, Lin only now noticed that silent tears were making their way down her cheeks. Realising she needed to give an explanation, but not being able to give one right then and there, she jumped up.

“I need air.” She breathed before leaving the house, having just enough clarity of mind to grab a coat on her way out.

She ran until the Water Tribe town was but a dot in the distance behind her. There, with nothing by snow and ice around her wherever she was looking, she suddenly felt infinitely small and weak. A new wave of hot anger and frustration washed over her as she let out a guttural scream, her voice echoing against the cliffs on the other side of the water.

..

Jun was the first who jumped off her chair when her mother had ran out, big anxious eyes scanning the room, searching for an explanation that of course wasn’t there. Until her eyes registered the letter Lin had dropped and picked it up.

Katara saw the girl was tempted for a moment to read its contents, before her better judgement decided to give it to Katara instead with a soft ‘mama dropped this, gran gran’.

“What on earth did that telegram say?” Toph’s loud voice sounded. 

“I don’t know, Toph. I’m sure Lin will tell us later.”

“Why wait when the kid just handed you the telegram already. Can’t you just read it out loud to find out?”

“I don’t think that would be a very polite thing to do.” Katara countered making herself up for the familiar argument that was to come between her and Toph.

And indeed, Toph huffed at her response. “Well, she is _my_ daughter and I want to know what is in that letter. Her heartbeat went absolutely wild when she read it. I am...I am _worried_..”

Katara was somewhat surprised to see Toph being so open about her concern for Lin. She was really making effort then. Still, that didn’t warrant breaking Lin’s privacy by reading the letter.

Just as she was about to say so, the echoes of a loud scream reached their ears. Causing all three of them to tense.

“That’s Lin.” Toph breathed. “ _Now_ , can you read what is in that letter?”

Katara gave a single nod. Politeness be damned. Lin was clearly in pain about something she read in that letter, would surely have bottled it all up by the time she would return and then it would take ages to get her on the right track again, she reasoned.

Unfolding the note her eyes started scanning its contents.

Ah. There it was. Looking over at her granddaughter she asked. “Jun, dear. Do you know someone called Tadao?”

The girl’s eyes lit up at the mention of the name as she nodded eagerly. “Yes! He is a friend. First he just taught me firebending, but then he became mama’s friend too.”

“ _Friend_ , hm?” Toph commented and Jun’s cheeks turned a little red as she was wise enough to sense Toph was getting at something else.

“When I was little, he was mama’s _boyfriend_ too - I think. But now they are just friends. Sometimes Tadao visits still. But that was before the disease...” her voice trailed off.

As Katara processed the new information, her mind took her back to a conversation she had had with Lin after she had just returned. ‘There was someone..it didn’t work out.’ She had sad. This must surely have been that someone. The waterbender’s heart sank at the realisation. Lin didn’t deserve this, especially not now that things just had seemed to get better again

“I see!” Toph grinned, still unaware of the contents of the telegram. “Well, what do you know..”

Katara looked up sharply at Toph’s amused voice. “There is no reason to be so cheerful.” She said and the coldness in her voice sobered Toph up immediately.

“Jun, would you be so kind as to get some wood for the fireplace?”

But the eight year old knew what her grandmother was trying to do and stubbornly shook her head. “No, gran gran. I want to hear what the telegram said too. Why is mama so sad? What happened with Tadao?”

And the fear in the girl’s eyes told Katara that her granddaughter had quite a good guess already about what it said. So she gave the girl a conceding nod.

“It seems, Lin’s friend Sora took to sending this telegram because Tadao...he has sadly passed away from the Gaipan Disease.”

She saw Jun swallow, the corners of her mouth dropping in sadness as she impulsively turned towards Toph who was closest to her in search for comfort.

Not one for hugs and tears, Katara momentarily feared what Toph’s reaction would be, but there was no need for worry asthe other woman wrapped her arms around her granddaughter.

“That sucks, kiddo. I am so sorry.” Toph said in a low comforting voice. Jun didn’t reply, but Katara saw her holding on tightly to Toph’s tunic as she came to terms with the news.

“I will really miss him.” She whispered eventually.

As Katara observed the two, she knew Jun would be alright with Toph. And so she stood up calmly and got her coat. Time to go look for Lin.

Already having an inkling where the metalbender might have gone, Katara made her way to the cliffs north of the town. It was quite a walk and one she probably shouldn’t be making on her own anymore at her age, but if she was right, she would have Lin to support her on the way back. And of _course_ she was right.

She stopped a little behind and next the other woman, who was crouched down, balancing on her feet, knees hugged to her chest with her arms wrapped around them as she stared out over the cold sea.

Katara saw tear tracks that nearly threatened to freeze on her cheeks. “I took the liberty to read what got you so upset when you ran away. My apologies for that.” Katara started. “And my condolences for your loss, Lin. Jun said the man was a very close friend of you..”

Lin eventually responded with a sniff and a shake of her head. “How did Jun react?”

“She is sad about it. But Toph is with her and she was surprisingly understanding about it. She will be fine. I rather want to know if _you_ will be. This man was, _more_ than a friend, was he not?” Katara tried rather boldly.

Lin shrugged, cocking her head to the side a little as she did so. “He was, then he wasn’t. I- I wasn’t _in_ love with him. But I did _love_ him. And to read that he is gone is just-“

She stopped to swallow, scrunching her eyes shut and suppressing tears.

“It is okay to grief, Lin. Just as it is for Tenzin, it is for you.”

“This is _nothing_ like what Tenzin is going through” Lin immediately snapped. “He lost his _wife_. I lost - I just lost someone...”

“ - you loved.” Katara finished the sentence for her and Lin’s shoulders slumped as she let out a defeated sigh.

“I just feel like I should have been there. That I should have done more.”

“But you did so much. Helped _so_ much, until you quite literally couldn’t go any further anymore, Lin. You did all you could.”

“But I wasn’t there. For them!” The blackhaired women countered stubbornly as she stood up, her eyes still fixed on the horizon.

“You can’t be in two place at the same time, Lin. You can’t save everyone.”

Lin swallowed and when she spoke again her voice sounded so small that it gave Katara a flashback to how Lin had been as a teenager; on a search for her place in the world and unsure about the question whether her efforts were enough.

“I’m just so tired.”

It was enough for Katara to approach Lin and place a comforting hand on the woman’s shoulder. 

“I know, honey. And you’re allowed to be. But you will get through this. Things will get better. They always do.”

They were somewhat empty words in one sense, but they were true and they seemed to give Lin the comfort she needed.

“Now, would you perhaps help to escort me back home? It is cold and I am old.” Katara matter-of-factly broke the silence after a while and it had the desired effect as Lin sent her a smile.

“Of course I will, aunt. And..thank you, once again.”

“Anytime my dear. Any time...” the waterbender mumbled as she held onto Lin’s arm and they started to make their way back home.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> sorry for this slow update! I flew back to the US on wednesday (impeccable timing obviously...), and am dealing with an annoying jetlag now :"). But here it is, a new chapter! And a happy one! There is some Jinora, Miyuki and Sora are back, there is dancing and there is Lin telling the press off. So yeah.. enjoy :)!
> 
> On another note, I downloaded this fic as an pdf to re-read in the plane (easy to forget details of the earlier chapters sometimes haha), and I noticed it is a freaking 200+ pages already, hahaha. Sorry for those who tagged along early for how long this story is dragging on. I hope it is still worth it :").
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

She felt numb and alive at the same time. Numb over the loss of Tadao, but alive because she finally had Jun with her again. If it wasn’t for the sake of her daughter, Lin wasn’t so very sure how she would have been faring right now. But luckily she didn’t have to think about that now. Jun was whom she was focusing on now, Jun and saying goodbye to Tadao.

She attended the funeral together with Jun. Sora said it would be good for Jun to be there. Jun had been on edge since she had learned Tadao had passed away. She wasn’t quite allowing herself to grief, not sure how to do it. And how _could_ she, she was only eight. An eight year old shouldn’t have to learn what it is to have to deal with the sudden death of a person years before their time

The four of them had flown to the south of the Fire Nation first, from there Katara and Toph had returned with Oogi to Republic City while Lin and Jun had taken the train to Fire Fountain City. Neither of the two older women had liked it that Lin would be travelling alone, but Lin had snapped that she was well enough to sit down for five hours in a train and after that her friends would be there to take care of her. That had satisfied them.

They stayed with Miyuki while they were in Fire Fountain City and it was good to see her friends again. Lin didn’t know how much she had truly missed them until she saw them again. They had all changed, the disease had forced them to. But their friendship was still the same, a point of certainty in the middle of all the chaos.

While she was in the Fire Nation, Lin knew it would have been polite to also stop at the Fire Palace to see Izumi. But she just didn’t have the energy to make that journey and deal with the protocol of palace. As if the Fire Lord had been able to read her mind, she had shortly upon arrival received a letter from Izumi, telling her not to feel obliged to visit. There would be time for that later. Once again, Lin had realized how lucky she was with a friend like Izumi, who was still able to guess correctly how she was feeling, even after all these years.

Miyuki and Sora were also well versed in the inner workings of her mind and character. Lin personally thought she had gotten through the whole funeral quite well, but when the time came to return to Republic City, both Miyuki and Sora declared quite decidedly that they would be accompanying her and Jun. And where it would have annoyed her to no end if her family had suggested this, with Sora and Miyuki she was absolutely fine. The prospect of spending some more time with the two women again reminding her of happier years gone by.

So that is how they returned to the Fire Nation residency in Republic City a few days later, where its large entrance hall and marble floor - representative for when she had to entertain official guests - had Sora whistling in awe.

Lin quickly set to work preparing rooms for her guests despite Miyuki’s and Sora’s protests that she should rest a little first The two men and one woman that made up her staff hadn’t returned yet.

“I’m entirely fine. I’m hardly more tired than I usually would be after a journey like that.”

“And _usually_ I would _also_ say you should rest first.” Sora countered but Lin just scoffed before leaving to get clean sheets.

When she returned, beds all made, she found her friends in the kitchen together with Jun. Miyuki was stirring in a big pan.

“Your fridge was terribly empty, but I found some canned vegetables so I’m making soup.” She said when she noticed Lin entering.

Lin shrugged. “Yes, well, no one really lived here for months. I’m surprised the lights and water still function.”

“I’m just going to pretend you didn’t say that.” Sora said shaking her head and Lin chuckled as she went to sit next to Jun at the kitchen island.

“If you want you can take a nap, Pebble. The time difference is confusing your rhythm. We’ll wake you when dinner is ready.” She said to her daughter who looked at her with sleepy eyes.

“No I’m just going to rest my head like this and stay awake.” Jun said, resting her head on her arms on the kitchen counter. It took a whole of two minutes before the girl was out.

Sora chuckled. “Just as stubborn as her mom.”

“You clearly haven’t spent enough time with her father.” Line countered dryly before brushing lovingly with her hand through her sleeping daughter’s hair.

“How is she holding up in general?” Miyuki then asked.

“She is getting there, I think. After that temper tantrum she threw two days ago I think she got that permanent anxiousness out of her system.”

Miyuki nodded. “Poor girl. You could literally see what was happening. One moment she was telling us a story, the next she suggests to go to Tadao’s to tell him as well, only to immediately realize _that_ isn’t possible anymore, and then she exploded.”

Sora nodded in agreement. “Yes, that is when it sank in.”

Lin was about to reply to that when suddenly the doorbell rang. Finding it hard to believe that press or anyone else wanting something from her had found out about her return so soon, and not expecting anyone, Lin stalked to the door with an annoyed expression on her face as she flung it open.

Her irritation washed away instantly however, when the next thing, she looked in the tearstained face of an eleven year old airbender.

“Jinora..” she spoke in surprise and it seemed to be the cue for the girl to fling herself forward, wrapping her arms around Lin’s waist and burrying her face in the fabric of her tunic.

“Aunt Lin, I heard from gran gran that you got home today, can I please stay here tonight? Please don’t make me go back?”

For a moment Lin was at a loss for words but as Jinora let go of her grip around Lin’s waist a little so she could look at Lin, she managed to focus again.

“Jinora, kid,” she started. “You are _always_ welcome here you know that, but something tells me your dad doesn’t know of your being here. So why don’t you come into the kitchen and tell me what has got you so upset and then we’ll see what we can do about the matter, hm?”

With a nod Jinora let go of Lin, then followed her into the kitchen.

If Sora and Miyuki were surprised to see her return with Jinora, they didn’t show it. Instead, casting one look at the girl’s upset face, Miyuki welcomed her enthusiastically and offered her a bowl of the soup she was just serving, while Sora gave her a kind nod as she was gently waking Jun up.

Jun just greeted her sister with a sleepy smile as she leaned against Sora, in an attempt to wake up.

“Now, why don’t you tell us what got you so upset, kiddo.” Lin said when they all had a bowl of steaming soup in front of them.

First, Jinora let out a deep sigh. Then she started speaking calmly but quickly grew more frustrated as she continued.

“Meelo keeps forgetting mom isn’t there anymore, and then Ikki gets mad and upset and she started shouting. And it is like that _all_. The. Time. And now it happened again and then Ikki broke mom’s favorite vase. And dad tried _really_ hard not to show he was sad about it, but I could see it in his eyes. And he doesn’t want to get mad at us so much because of everything, but it means he lets those two get away with _way_ too much. So then gran gran chastised Ikki and Kya got angry at dad for not doing so himself and then _they_ got in a fight and in the end everyone was just _yelling_ while gran gran tried to stop it, but she just couldn’t handle it all either. And just. I just. I couldn’t _be_ there anymore!”

With a frustrated sniff the eleven year old concluded what had brought her to Lin’s doorstep before taking a spoon full of soup.

The resoluteness would have made Lin chuckle if what Jinora was telling wasn’t so serious. “Well, sounds like a lot of tension...” The airbender nodded miserably.

“I can offer you an explanation of why everyone acts as they do, but I think you are clever enough to understand that yourself, aren’t you?” Lin asked gently and again, Jinora nodded.

“And sometimes all you need is a little peace and quiet. Or at least a place away from the tension. I understand that perfectly.” Lin then continued, all the while studying Jinora’s face carefully with each new word she spoke to check if what she was saying struck the right chord with the girl and wouldn’t upset her any further. She seemed to be doing alright so far. “And you are welcome to stay here for a while longer, but I will have to call your father to let you know you’re here, alright.”

“I know.” Jinora whispered. “But being just a little longer here would be nice.”

Lin nodded. “Of course, kiddo.” She smiled before getting up. “I’ll see what I can do. In the meantime Sora and Miyuki and Jun can keep you company.”

“Thank you, auntie Lin.” The girl smiled and Lin gave her another nod, still not that used to that specific title.

When she returned from her phone call, she saw Jinora and Jun giggling and clapping enthusiastically as Sora entertained them with waterbending tricks while Miyuki was doing the dishes.

As she entered the kitchen again Jinora looked up with a questioning gaze.

“You’re in luck.” Lin said. “Aunt Toph picked up the phone so I agreed with her that she would negotiate that your father won’t come to pick you up until 9pm tonight. So that’s half an hour of peace and quiet for you.”

“You think aunt Toph will be able to convince dad?” Jinora asked anxiously and Lin snorted.

“Kiddo, if my mom says she will negotiate, she means she will tell the other how it will be and that is that. So don’t you worry.”

Jinora chuckled at that.

“So, half an hour more hm?” Miyuki now joined the conversation. “What shall we do with that time?”

Lin arched an eyebrow as she saw the twinkling in her friend’s eyes. “I don’t have a particular suggestion, but by the look in your eyes I think _you_ do...”

“I think we should _dance_.” Miyuki immediately blurted out.

“I’m sorry _what_?” Lin uttered, and Sora looked even more skeptical than usual.

“Yeah, you know. Like old times. Dance away the bad.”

Lin’s stomach sank at that and she shook her head. “Oh, Miyuki, no I really don’t think-“

“Oh Lin come _on_.” Miyuki begged. “I know what you’re going to say, that it was Tadao’s thing. But don’t you see? That is precisely why we should do it! We are all miserable! Because of the past year, because of people we lost or people we were scared to lose. If Tadao had still been here, he wouldn’t have wanted to see us this downcast. He would have already gotten out some instrument and started a song.”

Lin swallows. She knew Miyuki was right, but she really didn’t feel up to doing anything of the sort right now.

“There are no musicians here.” She therefore countered weakly.

“We can get the phonograph from the study mama!” Jun now piped up, an excited twinkling in her eyes.

Of course, Lin thought, her daughter was all for this plan as she loved to dance.

“It isn’t exactly the peace and quiet Jinora came here for.” She tried again.

“Oh, but aunt Lin. Mom loved to dance, dancing sounds actually really good!”

Lin sent the girl an unamused look. “Jinora, you’re turning against me too?” She asked mockingly, and the girl let out a giggle in response.

Seeing the brunette laugh became instantly worth more than sticking too her own reluctance and so she conceded.

“Fine, fine.” She sighed before getting up slowly to get the phonograph from the study and move it to the hall that was big enough for all five of them to dance in.

Jun was quick to pick out her favorite record, a blues record that happened to be one Tadao often used to pick as well when he visited.

Lin swallowed heavily as emotion and memories seemed to take over as she looked at her daughter’s excitement.

“Come on, Lin. A little dancing might indeed not be such a bad idea.” She heard Sora’s encouraging voice next to her as the waterbender placed a hand on Lin’s upper arm in encouragement.

Shaking herself out of her melancholic state, Lin nodded, and aided by the enthusiasm of Jun and now also Jinora, she turned up the volume of the phonograph to its maximum. And eventually, when the volume still wasn’t quite to her taste, she shamelessly asked Jun to bend some waves so that the volume could even go higher.

And then they just danced. Blues, jazz, quicker and slower songs, she let the melodies take over as she was laughing with her friends and the two kids. She allowed memories of Tadao to wash over her, wiping away the occasionally lone tear and letting go of a lot of the buildup stress and anxiety of the past year.

Caught up in the music, she almost missed the knocking on the door some time later. Rushing to the door she swung it open, so that she stood eye in eye not just with Tenzin, but also with Kya and Toph.

“That’s a lot of people to come and collect one girl.” Lin greeted them, sounding fonder and happier than the three were clearly expecting, judging by their expressions.

Her mother recovered first as she shrugged and answered in signature sarcasm. “Nothing in town has reopened yet, so things like these are the next best thing to a ‘fun outing’ there is.”

Trying to look over Lin’s shoulder to where absurdly loud music was still sounding Tenzin asked, “What are you doing? Is everyone okay? You seem...out of breath.”

At that, Lin studied the three people in front of her a little better. Her mother annoyed and impatient as ever, Kya trying to look her usual calm and relaxed but with a tension in her jaw that betrayed how exhausted she was. And then Tenzin, all tensed up and anxious. They needed to blow off some steam as well, Lin decided.

So with an uncharacteristically mischievous grin on her lips she suddenly grabbed Tenzin’s arm and pulled him inside.

“We’re fine! We are dancing away this miserable, _miserable_ year. And I think you should join.”

And before Tenzin could utter anything she pulled him with her towards the hall. She was just able to hear her mother call after her ‘what are you high on cactus juice?’ before she entered the room where the dancing was still going on.

“Ah! More participants!” Miyuki laughed as she saw the three visitors. “Kya, come! This song asks for a duo dance!”

The waterbender, always open to the unexpected, didn’t need to be told twice - maybe _especially_ not since it was Miyuki asking her, Lin thought.

Pushing Tenzin towards Jun, who squealed a loud “daddy!” upon finally seeing her father again after a year, Lin turned to her mother who looked at her with raised unimpressed eyebrows.

“I didn’t know you danced.”

Lin shrugged. “Jun loves to dance. As did - as did Tadao...So now I dance.”

Her mother nodded and reached for Lin’s hand which she gave a squeeze. “Good.”

Then she went to sit down on a lone chair against the wall. “You go dance. I am going to enjoy all of your rhythmic footsteps and Tenzin’s not so rhythmic ones through the floor. I’m too old to dance.”

At that Lin nodded with a smile. As soon as she moved towards the dancing crew again, Sora pushed Tenzin in her arms - later, Lin would argue it was on purpose, but the waterbender denied that.

Holding one another to dance, didn’t feel at all like it was the first time in almost 15 years that they did so. And soon they were swaying rhythmically and in tune on the music, Tenzin’s two left feet suddenly no longer a problem as she saw his shoulders relax and the tiniest hint of a smile in the corners of his mouth.

Spinning and turning they danced through the song. And when it was over, they were met by silence and the occasional crackling sound as the record had reached its end.

“Better?” Lin asked quietly as she stepped away from Tenzin.

The older man nodded. “Better.” He agreed.

“Good...”And then in attempt to comfort him she added. “You’ll get there Tenzin. And Jinora is always welcome here if she needs a place to recharge. She is quite introverted and the island can be a crowded place sometimes.”

Tenzin smiled gratefully at her at that as he bowed his a head a little. “That is very kind of you, Lin. Thank you.”

“Of course.” Lin smiled briefly and somewhat nervously. With the music gone, so had the relaxed moment and they were back to their somewhat tensed way of communication ever since she had recovered again. They both knew Tenzin had been somewhat overstepping in his care for Lin, and Lin tried her hardest not to do so now either in lieu of Pema. It had created a fabricated distance between them, which was stupid, Lin thought – because there was nothing going on between them. It was just that the press didn’t see it that way, and even their own family was eager to read whatever they hoped for into each interaction between them.

“I – uh, I was planning on stopping by tomorrow with Jun, as I hadn’t expected you to visit this late today still.”

“You’re still welcome!” Tenzin said quickly. “I noticed how tired she is now and it _is_ quite late already after all. So it would be nice to see her tomorrow as well, and spend time with her when she isn’t so tired and overwhelmed.”

“Then we’ll be there.” Lin smiled, then pointing at their daughter and Jinora who were both now somewhat sleepily hanging on a chair, Lin said. “I think it is time you pick her up and take her home.”

“I think you are right.” Tenzin chuckled before moving to get up his oldest daughter.

“Do you mind if I spend the night here instead of on Air Temple Island?” Her mother’s voice now popped up next to Lin.

“Too much tension and drama there at the moment.” Toph explained as she must have sensed Lin’s surprise at the question.

“Of course you can stay here mom. I’ll prepare you a room right away.” Her mother gave a grateful nod at that.

When the others had all left, and Jun was in bed while Sora and Miyuki tended to cleaning downstairs, Lin moved to prepare a room for her mother. And as she moved to get sheets and blankets, the realization settled that she no longer felt numb. Still sad, and that would probably last a little longer, but no longer numb.

.

If any of their friends thought they had gathered any kind of spark between her and Tenzin that evening. They were rudely awoken from that dream some days later.

With schools starting back up, the kids had to be taken to and from school again and with both Lin and Tenzin resuming to work as well, that meant that a system to bring and pick them up had to be developed again for the days were previously Pema would pick the four up.

Lin took her usual two days, Tenzin two and Katara one day in the week. It worked well. And the cooperation was purely from a practical perspective, like it had been when Pema had still been there.

But unfortunately, the Republic City press had a field day following their every move, reading entirely too much into every little interaction.

It outraged Lin that they would so shamelessly do so, especially since Pema’s passing had only been eight weeks ago. As for herself, it annoyed her that to the press her -non-existent - love life still seemed to matter more than anything else she did. Well, at least they didn’t know about Tadao, that was something.

And then one night – she and Tenzin had just left the council building after a long meeting – Lin had had enough.

As soon as the two of them stepped outside, press reporters had flogged around them. Asking one impertinent question after the other. They dismissed and brushed away as well as they could. Tenzin moved to walk in front of her, making a path of sorts through the reports which Lin could follow.

But then suddenly a differently phrased question reached her ear, and before Lin knew what she was doing she stopped. And while Tenzin made his way through the crowd – not noticing that she was no longer behind him - Lin had whirled around furiously to the reporter asking the question, who repeated it as soon as he noticed he had her attention.

“Miss Beifong, don’t you think it is selfish not to engage with Councilman Tenzin? The man just lost his wife and now you are denying him his chance at finding happiness again.”

“ _What_?” She hissed. “ _What_ did you just say? Do you even _hear_ what you are suggesting? Whatever gave you the idea you can speak with such disrespect about other people and especially about the feelings of other people?! You are right, Councilman Tenzin just lost his _wife_! So if we are talking about not being selfish, the _selfless_ option for you lot would be to give the man some well-deserved space!”

She should have stopped there. The man had cowered under her state and even more so under her words. But now that she had allowed herself to engage with this bunch of fools, there was something else she needed to get off her chest. Something that had bothered her to no end since all of this started.

“Besides, make no mistake, I - ambassador Lin Beifong of the Fire Nation, daughter of the legendary Chief Toph Beifong of the Earth Kingdom, am _not_ a consolation prize to _anyone_!”

And with that turned around and stalked down the stairs, ignoring the new questions that were now being fired at her.

Finally downstairs she pulled Tenzin with her without looking at him, keeping her gaze firmly on the road ahead.

“I uh- I heard what you just said..”

“I’m sorry if I offended you.” She bit out.

“No, no, not at all!” Tenzin quickly said. “Actually, I thought it was really good what you said there. Well done, Lin! That will teach them. Reminded me of the Lin before all of this mess. Good to have her back.”

From the corner of her eye she could he was grinning at her and she found herself mirroring the expression at his compliment.

“Good.”


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> So sorry for the wait!! I had a craaaazy week and a busy weekend. The update you got here is shorter than you are used to from me. But it felt like a good cut of point for the chapter and otherwise it would have meant making you wait another week... so here you go! To be clear: over a year passes/has passed in this chapter. And also, my apologies for typos/mistakes as I wrote this on my phone and couldn’t do a proper grammar check etc. 
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

They were relentless. The press. Somehow they had found out about Tadao. Had dug as deep as they could to find out everything about her relationship with him. Dragged Jun and Tenzin in the equation or left them out of it depending on what was most convenient and built and then broke her character a thousand times over only to praise her to the spirits again the next day when she managed to solve her another triad problem.

And the irony, the _utter_ irony of it all, was that, while they were so busy spinning their stories, that they were completely blind to the actual relations that were being build right under their nose. 

Which was a good thing. Because she could indulge herself a little without getting punished by press.

But which also was a bad thing. Because there was no one but herself to stop herself from going too far. Her mother went back to her swamp, her sister had her own family and her best friend - and also her boss? - had to run a Nation.

She knew _he_ was struggling with the same dilemma. And for him too, there was no one to stop him.

His brother was back at the United Forces, and his sister back at the South Pole with his mother. He was all alone on that island with his kids, and sometimes also their kid. Just as she was all alone in that big residency with their kid, and sometimes also his.

And as they passed the one year mark of Pema’s death and then Tadao’s, they paid their respects to the them, but they also learnt that they had moved on. Because they had come to live in a new reality.

One where they would take silent walks through the park at night after a long, tensed council meeting where the insufferable water tribe representative was smug, and the others useless. Walks where at some point, somehow their hands would find each other, fingers intertwining. Walks of which the following morning neither of them spoke, let alone referred to the unacceptable, _bold_ move of hand holding. It had been a handholding of support anyways. Nothing else.

It was a reality in which he would sometimes come over for dinner, or she would go to him. For the kids’ sake, of course. 

And they would eat together, and then there would be something stronger to drink once the kids had left the table. Because they deserved it. And then, helped by the alcohol in their drinks, they would share stories, laugh and hum at memories.

They lived a reality where he could get on her nerves if he became too overbearing . Or where she got on his nerves when she pressured him too much into doing things her way.

They lived in a reality where one night she screamed at him from the top of her lungs that she still blamed him for what had happened. That he had broken something inside her the night that he led her on to believe against her better judgement that he was choosing her, and then he didn’t.

They lived in a reality where another night she yelled at him for trying to act like her best friend again whereas _surely_ they couldn’t ever go back to that again. Not after everything that happened. And it didn’t matter that it was a decade ago, and that they now had a wonderful nine year old daughter out of it. Because that was beside the point. He hurt her. _That_ was the point. He hurt her and now he was trying to be in her life again as if nothing ever happened. - _and_ she was falling for it, although _that_ she didn’t scream to him but kept to herself.

They lived in a reality where he yelled at her that he was so sorry. That that night should have gone completely different from how it had gone. That he had been a coward and that he had been confused. That she had _known_ that he had been confused, and quite drunk. That that didn’t make it alright what he had said to her, what he had wanted to make her try to believe. But that there had been _two_ of them in that relationship, and that there had been two of them that night. And she yelled back at him that she knew that. That she wasn’t meaning to seem like some damsel in distress, abused or worse. No, spirits no. She had known full well what she has gotten herself into that night. Had gone into it with her full consent. There was no mistake there.

It was the part where, the following morning, he reaffirmed that he loved her, that it had always been her and always would be her, but that that didn’t matter enough - _that_ is what she was mad about. Not the one night stand, hell not even the question whether it had been cheating or not - they had been on a break, but at the very least it had been poor character and a breach of integrity.   


No it was the fact that he told her to her face that _she_ was not _enough_.

They lived in a reality where, after that, he tried to show her that she _was_ enough for him. As his _friend_. Nothing more. The argument having reminded both of them that they were better as a platonic couple than a romantically involved one. That much was _definitely_ clear.

And so they resumed their surreal reality again. With platonic walks - but _with_ hand holding because now they frankly had just become accustomed to it. And with dinners - where he _did_ bring flowers, because she lived in such a big house, it could use some decoration. And they ignored and brushed away their younger kids’ suggestions that they could just live together, and they gave pointed stares at his oldest and at their feisty, perceptive firebender for suggesting more than once that there was something going on between them.

And she willed her heart to stop its irratic beating and change to a casual frequency after his fingers had brushed the skin of her neck that time a necklace had gotten stuck in her hair and he helped getting it out.

And he stayed longer in the restroom waiting for his skin to turn a normal Color again when he saw his face and head had turned all red in the mirror after she had sent him one of her rare, genuinely happy laughs over a joke he made that had a compliment on her hidden inside of it.

And they both completely _definitely_ ignored how their handholding with intertwined fingers around the lake at night now had _thumbs_ involved that were lovingly caressing the skin of the back of the hand of the other as they walked.

And she ignored the lightness and the happiness she felt bubbling inside of her. Terribly out of character. She didn’t do bubbly after all.   


And he ignored the way in which he wanted to randomly make an air pirouette out of pure excitement every now and then. Terribly out of character as well. He was a serious man and bending was to be used for serious matters 

And then...then they both ignored all their feelings and emotions all together, because Korra had arrived in Republic City, while a dangerous gang of sorts was kidnapping benders and releasing them without their powers, which meant that the year of peace was over and a new enemy had presented itself...


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> Here you go, a new chapter :)! A more elaobarte note at the end, because I don't want to spoil :)
> 
> Best,  
> Metope

Lin stormed from the ferry towards the house on Air Temple Island with angry strides.

She saw Ikki jumping out the window in excitement upon noticing her, then startling by the look on her face and racing back inside again yelling “Dad! Aunt Lin is here and she does NOT look happy!”

Tenzin was outside waiting for her by the time Lin had reached the house.

“Where is Korra?” She all but barked at him and when he shrugged she rolled her eyes at him.

“Great. First she ruins months of negotiating with the Agni Kai Triad and now she has gone missing. What an Avatar she is. And - _don’t_ look at me like that. I’m not exaggerating. She really did ruin the whole thing. Ran into them on the street, tried to take them on because she thinks that because she is the Avatar, she needs to take on all the bad guys -“

“- well isn’t that technically exactly what she-“

“- she won, but she ruined an entire good street. _And_ now the triad leader doesn’t want to negotiate anymore because they think we were behind it. And without the Agni Kai triad present the others don’t show up either. So everything, a _year_ worth of negotiating has been ruined by one overconfident teenager in less than ten minutes!”

The airbender let out a deep, exhausted sigh at that. “That sounds just...like Korra.”

Lin nodded with an annoyed expression. When she first had laid eyes on the Avatar again, over a year after she had first seen the girl on the South Pole, she wasn’t met by the gangly unsure teenager of back then. Instead a confident - _too_ confident - strong, athletic young woman had stood opposite of her. One with a temper shorter than that of her or even her mother. That wasn’t a good thing.

Tenzin kept saying it was all overcompensation for her insecurities. That _she_ of all people should be able to understand that. Naturally she had then barked at him to shut up immediately. And now that Korra had ruined her work, she was even less inclined to believe his theory. An insecure sixteen year old didn’t take on half a dangerous triad on her own.

“Look, she can literally be anywhere right now. But she will come back at some point - I hope..” Tenzin mumbled. “Why don’t you come inside for dinner for now and we will deal with Korra later?”

But Lin shook her head. “No, thanks to Korra I have work to do, say hi to Jun for me and tell her I’m picking her up tomorrow from school a little later than usual, and that she is to wait inside the school.”

“I can pick Jun up as well if you want to?”

“No.”

“Fine, I only wanted to help.” Tenzin said, hands raised in front of him.

“Yes well, you can help me by controlling your Avatar.” Lin grumbled as she turned around.

“Oh, _my_ Avatar now hm!?” She heard Tenzin call after her in a mixture of indignation and amusement.

She raised a hand in the air and waved it at him dismissively, not showing him the grin on her lips.

..

Jun walked out of the school together with Jinora, Ikki and Meelo. They were being picked up by Korra, whereas she had to wait for her mother to show up, since her mom hadn’t allowed her to go with Korra.

The fact that they were the only four kids left in the school, because Korra was much too late, told Jun why her mother had decided so. But still, this was the Avatar and it was Korra. Her friend. She wanted to say hi to her. Thus she ignored her mother’s instructions to wait inside, opting to wait on the school yard with the others instead.

“I thought I had told you to stay inside!”

That wasn’t Korra. Instead her mother, a highly irritated expression on her face approached the four of them.

“Hi aunt Lin. Are you here to pick all of us up? Korra was supposed to get us but she didn’t show up yet.” Ikki piped up before Jun could say anything.

“I know.” Lin growled. “Something came up, apparently.”

Jun frowned at the vague explanation and she saw Jinora study Lin as well. “Is everything okay with Korra, aunt Lin?” The eldest girl asked, but it earned her an absentminded _yes_ and a nod.

“Let’s go. I have more meetings to attend today.”

Jun’s stomach dropped at that. “You always have meetings these days.” She muttered, and looking at her mother through the curtain of black hair of her bangs, she saw her mom’s expression fall, a look of guilt shining through.

Instantly feeling bad for her comment Jun added “But it’s okay. I know it is important..”

Giving her a pat on the back, Lin smiled softly at her “Just a few more days, kiddo and then it’s weekend and we will go and do something fun, just the two of us, okay?”

Jun happily nodded at that.

The rest of the week she looked forward to her mother’s promise. But when the day came, they did spend it together, although it could definitely _not_ be described as fun.

That morning she had still been at her father’s home. She hadn’t been supposed to be there, but apparently something had happened to one of Korra’s new friends and now her parents were quite anxious in keeping her and her brother and sisters on Air Temple Island and under constant supervision as much as possible.

Jun wasn’t quite sure what it was, but it had something to do with a certain man called _Amon_ and something that had happened in the pro-bending arena the other day.

It scared her that her parents were so worried. There had been threads before, but her parents had never been afraid, always capable of defending their family against the bad guys.

The fact that now, they were on edge all the time, meant something truly dangerous was going. The other night, Jun had worked up the courage to ask her mother if this perhaps had to do again with the group that had kidnapped her years ago. Her mother had been quick to say that that was definitely not the case. But at the question if their new enemy was to be feared equally, Lin had eventually nodded slowly.

Jun appreciated that her mother had not tried to lie about the threat. Her mother was trusting her with more things lately, a sign that Jun didn’t just _felt_ older, but her mother saw it too and was treating her accordingly, allowing her to take her firebending training to the next level, and entrusting her with more information about the _important_ things, as Jun liked to call it, such as in this case. That was also why Jun didn’t protest against her father telling her that morning that he was accompanying her to her mom, even though she was old enough to go by herself now, she was almost ten after all.

Later, Jun was beyond grateful that her dad had gone with her that morning. Because they had only just left the ferry when her father took her hand in his and pulled her with him into an ally.

“Jun, no need to be afraid. But we are being followed. We are going to try to lose them but whatever happens, I need you to stay close.” Tenzin mumbled under his breath and Jun whispered an unsteady _ok_ back at him as she tightened her grip around her father’s hand.

Losing their followers turned out to be not an option however, as suddenly four masked men jumped in front of them, and another two showed up behind them. They were stuck.

Feeling her father’s grip tighten, Jun knew what was going to happen. He was going to airbend them onto the roof. Preparing herself for the strong gust of wind that was about to come, Jun shrieked when, before Tenzin could do anything, one of the man attacked her father by trying to slam his hand down on her father’s shoulder. Tenzin swiftly moved to avoid the attack, but because his other hand was still holding onto Jun, and as he was shielding her from their attackers, he missed another man with an odd looking glove attacking him from his right, sending an electrical current from the glove through him. And Tenzin let out a pained growl.

Jun’s eyes widened as the electricity immediately traveled from Tenzin towards her, as she was still holding onto her father.

It took her only a split second to decide what to do. These men clearly did not know what _she_ could do. Absorbing the electricity like a sponge, pulling it all away from her father, she immediately channeled the energy towards her free hand and with an angry cry she directed it at the man attacking them, hitting him in the chest with the electricity.

As the man flew backwards, Tenzin had time to regain control of the situation. Letting go of her hand, he used both hands to create a powerful bold of wind, blowing all six men away.

Jun herself called on her bending to create a blue fire bolt in one hand and an electric sphere in the other, ready to attack.

Neither of them noticed the seventh man jumping off the roof and Jun let out a terrified scream as a hand suddenly landed hard on the space between her nek and shoulder. And just like that it was as if all energy left her, her power disappearing and with it all her strength as she fell to the ground, arms and legs limply beside her.

Lying there on the ground, terrified and unable to defend herself or see what was going on around her except for a lot of feet stumbling around, it felt as if an eternity was passing by before she was lifted from the floor by arms clad in yellow and orange fabric.

Dad.

“You’re safe, Jun. I got you.” He whispered as he launched them finally onto the roof with a gust of air.

“We defeated them. You will be fine. They blocked your chi. It will come back with some rest, just close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing.”

She could hear in her father’s voice that he was trying to stay calm for her sake, but that he was just as terrified as she was feeling.

Listening to his instructions, she closed her eyes, and soon fell asleep.

Upon waking up, she instantly felt sick. Finding herself able to move again and taking in the familiar surroundings of the living room in her home, she shot up, searching for something to throw up in.

“Here, kid.”

A bucket appeared within her vision and grabbing it with both hands she was just in time as her stomach decided to empty its contents.

A hand started rubbing soothing circles over her back and by the feel of it she knew it was her mom.

After the bucket she was given a glass of water and a towel to rinse her mouth. Feeling slightly better she turned to look at her mother next to her and immediately leaned into her so that her mother could wrap her arms around her.

“It’s okay. You’re safe. You’ll be fine.” Lin soothed.

“Dad?” She croaked out.

“He’ll be fine too. He went to the healers to get himself looked after.”

“I tried to help...” she answered helplessly, then grimaced. “I feel awful.” She heard her mother hum at that

“You did a great job helping, Pebble. I am so proud of you. There was a lot of electricity that was charged at the two of you, judging by what your father told me. You saved him by absorbing it. But having relied on your bending so heavily, shortly before a chi blocker hitting you, is heavy on your body. That is why you feel so sick now.”

Jun sighed. “We were supposed to do something _fun_ today.”

“Well, we will do something fun when you feel better. At least, today we’ll be together all day, hm? And the day after too. Until you feel beter again” Her mother comforted and the ten year old nodded solemnly.

“Who are these people, mama? Why are they attacking us?”

Lin sighed. “They call themselves equalists. They are nonbenders who think the world isn’t fair and that benders control everything.”

Jun thought about that for a moment. “It is true that benders run a lot of things….But then they could just start a petition. They wouldn’t need to attack us.”

Her mother chuckled. “Exactly. And since they resort to violence, that is why we are trying to stop them. And in return, they want to stop us. Especially those with unique bending skills.”

“Like dad...”

Lin nodded. “And you, now that they saw what you did. A girl your age usually cannot bend electricity so well.”

“What would they do with us if they got us?” Jun continued.

Lin swallowed. “Don’t worry about that, Jun. We are going to make sure they don’t get you.”

Jun definitely wasn’t satisfied with that answer. But she also felt too awful to say so. She would get back to it later, she decided. Now she wanted to sleep some more.

Later never came however, as in the two weeks that followed, there seemed to be an attack or a problem of some sort every day. And before Jun knew it, the city was under attack, she, her parents and her siblings were flying away to safety on Oogi and then the air ship came for them.

She saw her parents exchange looks, saw that the message their eyes sent, meant that things were taking a turn for the worse for them. She heard her father speak a firm “ _Absolutely_ not” through gritted teeth. She heard her mom reply with a snapped “if we do nothing we are all dead within an hour from now.”

“We take them to safety and then go after them together.” Her dad said but her mother shook her head. “ We won’t make it in time.”

“Fine, then _I_ will hold them off.” Tenzin huffed.

“And hand them the most powerful airbender in the land? I don’t think so. Besides, think of your children.”

“I could say the same to _you!_ ” Her father hissed.

“ Mom?” Jun asked unsure, there was something going on in the conversation her parents were having that she couldn’t quite grasp, and looking at her siblings they were equally at a loss, but just as worried.

“You are not sacrificing yourself for us, Lin. Not for the kids, not for me. Not again. We will find a way to defeat them. I will bend a tornado to keep them away.” Tenzin said determined and he started to move towards the side of Oogi’s back, trying not to fall off or make anyone else fall as he did.

And as he did so, while her mother continued their argument, neither of them noticed two equalists jumping out of one of the ships and catapulting themselves towards them, until Ikki shrieked and pointed at them. Another pair of two was standing on the airship that was now almost flying directly below them, ready to jump as well.

Oogi groaned under the added weight as the first two equalists landed, although one was just as quickly blast off the Sky Bizon again by a gust of wind from her father. The other one was a more skilled fighter. They all expected him to go after the airbenders, and that is why none of them – not even Lin herself – were prepared for the equalist to launch itself at Lin and jump off the Sky Bizon with his arms wrapped around her, so that he was pulling her with him.

And while Jun cried out “ _mama_ , _no_!”, Tenzin launched forward in an attempt to hold onto Lin. But it all happened too fast, and later Jun would wake up in the middle of the night with the look of utter surprise and disbelieve on her mother’s face carved in her mind.

Although midfall, she continued to struggle free from the grasp of the equalist, and to everyone’s surprise succeeded.

Great, Jun thought. Now that mom was near the metal airship, she would have more metal to bend next to the cables in the suit she was wearing. They would all be save.

It was the umpteenth wrong assumption she made that day. For her mother did use her bending, and she did draw her cables from her suit. But as she turned around and looked up, her eyes locking onto Jun’s own, Jun realized that her mother was not going to try to get back to Oogi.

And she screamed and tried to jump up and go after her mom, before strong arms wrapped around her and kept her from doing so as she thrashed wildly, while watching through her tears how her mom took on the equalists on the ship before ripping the metal and letting the ship crash into the other two, sending them all down in a big cloud of dark smoke.

And as the smoking site became smaller and smaller, the arms of her dad were replaced by the embrace of her siblings, while her dad urged Oogi to fly faster than he had ever done.

Jun didn’t at all pay attention to where they were going, but when they landed and jumped off Oogi, the familiar amber eyes framed by glasses of Izumi met her and she launched herself into the woman’s embrace without a second thought. They were at the camp of the Fire Lord.

A kiss in her hair made her turn around, only to see her father moving from her to do the same to her siblings before jumping on Oogi again. “I’m getting her back! Don’t you worry!” He called after them, and Jun, with every bone in her being, hoped that her father was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha all,
> 
> So I hope you liked this chapter! I made a few time jumps, for I don't really find it interesting to retell things that happened in the episodes. I did change a couple of things though:  
> 1) I thought those elektric gloves had an unrealisticly weak effect in the show. When someone is shooting an elektric current through you and you are not a firebender who can bend elektricity, then it is very unlikely that you can just shrug it off like that...   
> 2) I feel like part of the reason why Lin jumped off Oogi in LoK is because she feels like she needs to protect Tenzin and his family and SHE has nothing and no one to lose. Now, with Jun in the game, I don't feel like Lin would make a decision like that equally fast, so I had to bring an element in there, that would push her over the edge when it comes to that decision. So that is what I did in the chapter. Oh and..Tenzin is going to be furious with her when he finds her. To be so selfish and sacrifice herself whereas their kid needs her, and I can't say I disagree..Jun for sure is traumatized probably, as are the other three kids, I would say. But first, I'll let him go and look for poor Lin... 
> 
> Let me know what you think :)!  
> Best,  
> Metope


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, here I am again with another chapter :)! Thanks all of you who commented on the last one, so two things about this chapter:  
> 1\. I didn't follow the plot of canon LoK very much with this chapter but I do plan on getting somewhat back on track again in the next one;  
> 2\. Therefore, I first need to rewatch a couple of LoK episodes because I don't properly remember anymore what the order of events is when Amon gets defeated, so please bear with me while I do that hopefully next week, haha. 
> 
> Always curious to hear what you think of the chapter of course, so leave a comment if you feel like it :)!  
> Thanks!  
> Metope
> 
> Ps. I just noticed that this story hit over a 100.000 words and over 10.000 views. HA! That is craaaaazy! Thanks to all of you who read this story :D:D!

She stumbled out of whatever silo they had kept her in relatively unharmed. That is, no cuts, no bruises.

‘ _You captured the ambassador of the Fire Nation!? Are you out of your damn mind!’_ She had heard someone call at some point. ‘ _We don’t want war with the Fire Nation. Not yet Anyways.’_

Well, that had explained her release.

‘ _But sir. It is not just the ambassador. It is Lin Beifong.’_

And that had explained what did happen to her just before her release.

The whole ordeal had left her weak, nauseous and disoriented regardless. Taking in her surroundings she felt a terrible fear wash over her as the dark alley seemed twice as haunting in her current state.

She couldn’t see. It was so dark, and her head was hurting. She should be used to this, had lived through this before, but she felt too rattled to keep herself calm enough to deal with anything at all honestly.

Finding her way out of the alley by following the wall, she soon found herself on a deserted street in one of the more dangerous areas of the city. She best not get recognized now or she would get some cuts and bruises after all.

Staying in the shadows of the buildings and out of the light of the street lamps she started making her way east where she knew the city center would be. After half an hour of walking, or rather stumbling her way through the dark alleys, she finally got to a place where she at least knew where she was.

The Sky Bizon that suddenly landed in front of her made her nearly jump out of her own skin.

“Lin! I found you! Thank the spirits you are okay!”

A flurry of yellow and orange fabric jumped off the Bizon and pulled her into a tight hug before she could do or say anything.

Wriggling herself out of the embrace at the first opportunity she got, Lin quickly set a few steps back, a scowl on her face. “What on earth are you doing here!? Out in the open and being loud. Are you out of your mind?”

Tenzin shook his head. “Why, looking for you of course. Saving you, but -“

“I didn’t need any saving. The only thing you did by showing up is making my sacrifice useless, as you are walking right back into the lion’s den.”

Tenzin frowned, opening his mouth to reply but Lin shook her head.

“Save it. First we need to get out of here.”

The two adults climbed on Oogi and quickly flew into the air again on their way back to the Fire Nation camp.

At first, Lin didn’t say anything, and she made it a point to avoid any eye contact. Then Tenzin lost his patience.

“You know. For someone who just got captured by equalists, you’ve got awfully little to say.”

Lin shrugged. “What is there to say. I let myself get captured so that you could get to safety. They let me go since I am the Ambassador to the Fire Nation and even they are clever enough not to want to confront the Fire Lord just yet. Then you come flying back in, putting yourself in harm’s way. If anything you should be _grateful_ for what I did, not talk to me as if I am some petulant child!”

“You are absolutely crazy.” Tenzin hissed.

She just arched an eyebrow in response.

“You really think I am grateful, or happy about what you did? How you treated your own life with so little value?! How you abandoned your daughter!?”

“I did not abandon her. I did this for her! For her and for you and your children!”

“What rubbish!”

“I was already falling. What else could I have done!?” She still refused to look at him.

“Well, I don’t know…if only you had been a metalbender who could have shot a metal cable towards us to get back on Oogi...oh wait. YOU ARE!”

She bit her lip at that. Truth was, in the moment she had been so sure it had been the right decision, had assumed they would let her go as soon as someone with an actual brain realized they had captured a Fire Nation Diplomat. As things went on, she had gotten less and less sure of that assumption however, and now, as Tenzin yelled at her, she started to see the error of her ways and realized that the fact that she was sitting here now, had a lot to do with sheer dumb luck.

Suddenly feeling even more vulnerable than she already did she muttered a quiet “Jun would have had you. And, I didn’t think th-“

“Yeah that is the problem with you, Lin!” Tenzin interrupted her, still yelling and Lin was glad they were already high up in the sky or he would have surely awoken all of republic city. “When it is about your own well-being you never think! Not of yourself! And for _what_ this time? To prevent these criminals from taking our bending away? So what? Your life should be worth so much more than bending, of any kind. Your life is to me at least!”

At that she whipped her head to the right so that she could look at Tenzin, her irritation and anger suddenly forgotten. Her eyes widened as she saw his red face, brows furrowed in anger, jaw tensed and grey eyes swirling with anger, fear and concern.

“Don’t just look at me like that!” He growled. But all Lin could do was blink as she processed his words.

“Do you really mean that?” She finally uttered and Tenzin let out an exasperated sigh.

“Of course I do! And I am glad that I do, clearly one of us needs to value your life and you are not going to do it.”

She took a sharp intake of breath, searching for words in her perplexed state.

“That is the first time I have ever witnessed you put me above your airbending.” She then blurted out.

It was as if all anger and adrenaline left Tenzin at once when she said that. Instead making place for defeat and exhaustion as his shoulders slumped and shame and self-loathing entered his eyes.

He just sat like that for a while, looking at her with that expression on his face while she stared back at him, studying him as she tried to make sense of what this meant.

“I can never say or do anything that will make the past right. It is just not possible. Trust me, I would if I could. I - I really love my children, all four of them. But I would do it all differently if I could. I would do right by you.” He sighed, his voice tired and old.

Feeling that she had to say something now, Lin swallowed. “The other day, I said that nothing you could ever do or say could make up for the past, nor could it make me forget any of it. Or even make me trust you fully again, no matter how much I want- wanted that...”

“Yes, yes. I know.” Tenzin interrupted her curtly, frowning and a closed expression appearing on his face as he tried to shield himself from her words.

“ _But_ ,” Lin continued, her voice softer. “But I think...I think you just did.”

When he looked up with a non-understanding look on her face she emphasized, “I think you just _did_ show me you changed. You just did show me I can trust you. You just, literally flew into a city under siege, where every eye is set on capturing you to get me out. While you didn’t even know where I was exactly, or what you were flying into. And you just literally put something else, someone else, _me_ , above your bending and the future of the Air Nation.”

Tenzin shrugged, looking down. “I also have three airbending children.” He countered half-heartedly.

“Who wouldn’t stand a chance without you, and you know it.” Lin countered. “And none of them are truly introduced to the culture yet either.”

“They could learn.” He tried halfheartedly, but she could see that he was just trying to avoid admitting that she was right by her observation.

“Are you now just trying to disagree with me for the sake of it? You are kind of digging your own grave here while I am forgiving you.” Lin remarked unimpressed and Tenzin chuckled nervously as he lifted his head again.

“No, no..it is just..I hadn’t even thought about it that much. I just— did what I thought was the right thing, it feels logical to me to do and say what I just did.”

Lin’s eyes softened at that as she held his gaze. “I know.” She said softly. “That is why I know it was genuine. You didn’t overthink, you didn’t debate, you didn’t strategize You did what your heart told you, and that was putting someone other than yourself or your culture first.”

They held each other’s gaze at that, Lin’s words lingering in the air as neither of them dared to speak while Oogi flew on.

Lin was the first to shake out of it. “Easy there, Airhead. My forgiveness doesn’t meant anything more than just that.”

“I didn’t think anything else.” Tenzin countered and he quickly turned back around to direct his attention to Oogi again.

They continued their way in silence. At some point Lin went to lie down on Oogi’s back, and soon after she drifted off to sleep.

She woke hours later under soft sheets, with the sounds of morning in the Fire Nation hide out coming from outside the tent she was finding herself in.

Slowly sitting up, she put her feet over the edge of the bed and gently placed them on the ground, her knuckles turning white as she held on tightly to the side of the bed as she tested her footing. Her hands were now as numb as her feet. That was new.

Before she could dwell on it some more, the tent door swept open and in came Izumi.

“Good. You are awake.” She said, and before Lin could say anything else she pointed a finger with a sharp nail at Lin, while sending her a threatening look over her glasses. “If you _ever_ do anything like that again, I will fire you immediately. As ambassador and as my friend. Spirits, sacrificing yourself like that. I was ready to break decades of pacifist policy and go to war for you! Do you know how _disastrous_ that would have been!? – Don’t just sit there looking at me like that! What do you have to say for yourself!?”

Lin stared at her friend umbfounded. It wasn’t often that Izumi let her emotions show so much. “Uh-the- I am...sorry you almost went to war for me?” She stammered.

“Oh it wouldn’t have been for _you_ -you.” Izumi swatted the half-baked apology away. “It would be because of your status and title in the Nation.”

Then, with all the anger out of her system, the Fire Lord let out a sigh as she went to sit next to Lin on her bed.

“That is what I would have told the world. In my heart, I would definitely have gone to war for you. Spirits, Lin, what were you thinking.”

Again, Lin shrugged. And again she answered that she didn’t see that she had much choice when she had already fallen off Oogi.

Izumi shook her head. “You are unbelievable. What would we have told Jun if you hadn’t returned?”

At that Lin had the decency to look ashamed.

“I mean -“ Izumi continued, “I get it you have always sort of been alone. But now you have Jun. And I know that having the man you loved-“

“ _Tenzin_ has nothing to do with this.” Lin found herself snapping suddenly and it earned her a surprised look from Izumi.

“I was going to say Tadao, actually.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, ‘oh’.” Izumi said pointedly, and then tentatively asked. “Should I - should I have said Tenzin instead?”

Lin was quick to shake her head. “No. – Or, well, I don’t know. We grew closer over the past months that’s all. But we also kept fighting, always finding ourselves back at the same point in time, ten years ago. Unable to get past that. So I was convinced I had let it go. As did he. But then last night...it was the first night I saw him putting something else above his culture, above himself. He put _me_ before him. So now I am confused...”

Izumi hummed in wonder. “But he has put you before himself before, when you were ill.”

“I wasn’t conscious when he did that. Besides, that wasn’t the exactly putting me before his _airbending_. That is what was different this time around. And now it is all muddy and dramatic.” Lin scrunched up her nose in disgust as she said this and her friend chuckled.

“For someone who abhors romance, your life sure has a nose for the dramatic.”

“I know.” Lin scowled.

Then the tent opened again and in came a flash of red fabric and black hair. “Aunt Izumi! Aunt Izumi, I picked up on a radio signal with my bending _and_ I could translate it. The equalists are going to attack the island. They think we are hiding somewhere on the island! I already informed dad, and he is going to send uncle Bumi there to make sure the acolytes are safe And- _Oh_. You are awake, finally.”

Jun at ten years old was a ball of energy and of contradictions. Almost a teenager one moment, and a child the next. And she had transformed from the latter, excited over her contribution to their fight against the equalists, to the former as her gaze hardened and her features schooled themselves upon seeing Lin there.

It was the most terrifying thing Lin had ever seen, not in the least because she _knew_ that look. That was how she had looked at her own mother when she felt her mother had disappointed her again, had abandoned her again.

“I will leave the two of you to talk.” Izumi said discreetly before leaving the tent.

“I don’t have anything to say to you.” Jun said promptly as she leaned against a chair.

Lin sighed. The key was not to react now as her mother had always done, which was trying to justify her choices. So instead, she lowered her head in remorse. “I made a mistake, Jun. I’m so sorry.”

She could see by the stiffening in her daughters posture that that had not been the reaction she had expected.

“You didn’t even _try_ to get back to us.”

“I thought I was protecting you by doing what I did.”

“Protecting us how? From what? From fear? From pain? From anger? Well, you failed mama, because I felt all of those!”

The words cut right through her heart and the tears she could see shimmering in Jun’s eyes made her get up on wobbly legs and walk over to her daughter to pull her into an embrace.

The girl kept her rigid posture for a little while longer before melting into the hug and burying her face in the fabric of her tunic.

“I thought you were gone. And for what? We could have made it out of there. We were six benders against four non-benders. We outnumbered them!”

“They were chi blockers.”

“Still.” The girl said stubbornly.

“I know…I know..” Lin soothed.

“Did dad yell at you?” Jun asked after a while.

“Yes he did.”

“Good. I told him to do that.”

Lin laughed at that. “Well, he listened. He gave me an earful, I was worried we would wake up the entire city and it would ruin our escape.”

Jun chuckled in response before breaking away from the hug and studying her mother. “Did they do...anything to you? While they had you captured?”

“Nothing that prevents me from living my life.” Lin answered, and it wasn’t a lie. It was an odd answer however and she saw Jun frown and ready to ask another question.

“Come, I’m hungry let’s try and find something to eat before we see what the plan to get out of this predicament is.” She therefore quickly said, and Jun kept on staring at her for a moment longer before she nodded, instead starting off on how the breakfast in this place was terrible but she had tried everything so at least now she could recommend her mother what not to eat.

Later that day, it was decided that the following day, they would all stay at the Fire Nation Residency, as the Fire Nation Camp was not equipped to house four children and two non-combatant adults. The fact that the equalists had let Lin go, meant they wouldn’t attack her residency. Not yet at least, so with some reinforcements it would be safe for Tenzin and his children to stay there. Meanwhile, Izumi would stay at the Fire Nation Camp on the border of the Fire Nation, where they currently were, ready to intervene when necessary. And hopefully Korra would have managed to defeat Amon before the equalists did feel ready to attack.

That night, Lin woke up with a start to what she soon found to be the sound of her own screaming. Two guards, Tenzin, Jun and Izumi all entered her tent at once and it took her the better part of an hour to convince all of them – especially – Tenzin that she was fine, and that it had just been a dream.

A scary, terrifyingly realistic dream, she thought to herself – but a dream nonetheless. The better part of the following day, she noticed both Jun and Tenzin keeping an eye on her at all times, watching her every move. They felt something was off. Of course they did…

After dinner they sat down to make a plan on deciding how best to get to the residency unseen that night.

“You must take the children by foot, and I will go with Oogi.” Lin said to Tenzin that evening when it was just the two of them and Izumi and Bumi. “That way, I can distract them and you four don’t run as big a risk of getting caught.”

She had hoped her friends would go along with her suggestion easily, but of course they didn’t as it didn’t make sense at all. “Wouldn’t it be more logical if _you_ went with the kids, seeing as they go by foot over the earth and you are an earthbender and such? Whereas Tenzin here, is the airbender?” Bumi pointed out dryly and Lin tried to pull her face into an annoyed and impatient scowl.

“That is exactly what they expect us to do, and that is why we shouldn’t do it.”

That seemed to satisfy Bumi, but Izumi wasn’t buying it. “I don’t know, Lin. Reversed psychology? I don’t think they’ll fall for it.”

“Of course they will!” Lin countered with a little more force in her voice than she had meant to.

“But what if they know we are using reversed psychology and they use _their_ reversed psychology on us, so that in the end we do _exactly_ what they want us to do, while we think we are doing the opposite, but they _knew_ that we _knew_ that they would think that.”

“Careful there Bumi, or you might fry your brain.” Izumi teased before her face grew serious again. “I do agree with him though.” She turned to Tenzin then. “What do you think?”

The airbender hadn’t said a word up until then, instead he had his gaze transfixed on Lin, eyes narrowed and arms crossed.

She sent him a nervous smile as she noticed this, but in response Tenzin just slowly unfolded his arms, reached for the ground next to him with his left arm, before grabbing a hand full of sand and dirt which he squeezed into a lump of dirt before suddenly throwing right at her.

For a split second her bending reflexes kicked in, before she yelped instead and dug to avoid the earth from hitting her. Time to ask what on earth Tenzin was doing, she didn’t have, because as soon as she looked back up, she found that he had already thrown a second hand full at her, followed by a little rock he had also found.

She was up and out of her chair in an instant, trying to avoid whatever he threw at her with a disappointing success rate.

“Tenzin, what are you doing? Stop that!” Izumi called out, while Bumi just stared perplexed at the whole ordeal before he slowly lifted his finger and pointed at Lin.

“Why isn’t she bending it away?” He asked softly, but loud enough for all of them to hear.

Tenzin immediately stopped his actions at the question and Lin’s heart sank as she heard it.

“Yes, Lin. Why aren’t you bending it away?” Tenzin drawled, his eyes glinting with held back anger, Lin noticed with a start.

She looked from him, to the questioning gazes of Bumi and Izumi and back again before swallowing heavily and looking towards her feet as a blush crept up her cheeks.

“Please don’t make me say it..” She whispered.

“Say what, Lin?” Tenzin pushed further and she hated him for doing that, but she also knew that he did it because she should have told them right away, because it was a secret that needed to be out, for her own sake and this was quite literally the only way in which she would have come forward with her secret. By putting her on the spot. She was her mother’s daughter after all. But not quite. And where Toph might have screamed and yelled and cursed at everything and everyone around her if this had happened to her, Lin had just bottled all of her feelings up and pretended like they hadn’t existed.

And it had last not even 48 hours before that bubble burst. And she felt the tears rising in her throat, as she tried to bite back a sob. And she felt her hands starting to tremble. And she started to feel hot and cold at the same time. And she bit down hard on her bottom lip to stop it from wobbling but it did not work.

And just as she was about to break, was about to fall on her knees and let her sobs ring through the tent, she felt strong arms wrap around her, pulling her into familiar robes and a familiar embrace that kept her from falling and swallowed her sobs.

And she cried. And finally, finally she said the words she had wanted to be untrue for the past hours.

“They took my bending.”


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,
> 
> Sorry for not having updated in a while. Thank you so much to all of you who have reviewed the previous chapter. 
> 
> I didn’t feel too well at the beginning of the week and work has been really busy. But here I am with a new chapter, and it is all Tenzin POV!   
> I wanted to update this weekend already, so I haven’t written everyone reacting to finding out Lin losing her bending yet. But I think /hope you will also like this chapter, as it is another important step in the Linzin arc :).   
> Best,  
> Metope

Lin.

The way in which she crumbled in this embrace was not exactly how he had imagined the first time holding her again would be.

And yes, he had imagined it. He had tried not to, had _consciously_ made an effort because he didn’t feel like he had the right to even do much as imagine it, that it was his place to do so.

But they had grown closer, and they did spend more time together. And sometimes when he did not make that conscious effort, his mind would just wonder. Or rather his heart.

She had been so surprised when he had come to help her escape from Amon. _Help_ , yes. Because he knew that “save” would not be accurate here. Lin didn’t need saving. She was perfectly capable of holding her own.

Help however, is not always there for those who can’t help themselves. Help is also there, offered by others, to make things easier and more comfortable. Like getting out of the city on Oogi instead of having to navigate her way out on her own. And now, in hindsight, he was all the more happy that he had found her. Navigating Republic City without her bending would have been a terrible idea.

So he had helped her. And she had been surprised. And she had been even more surprised when he had said that his bending was worth less than her well-being. Which it was. Which it always should have been.

It had cut straight through his heart how that surprise was a mirror of how little she thought of herself - something he had definitely contributed to with how things had gone for them in the past.

He felt her form tremble as the weight of what had happened to her truly crashed into her and in a reflex he tightened his embrace around her, as in an attempt to shield her with his arms from all the bad in the world. Instinctively he lowered his head, and he almost pressed a soothing kiss in her hair before he stopped himself, realising that that was overstepping it and certainly not something she needed right now.

He loved her.

He loved her so much it hurt.

He had realised it a while ago. When he had found her sitting underneath a big tree in her garden one day when he was dropping Jun of. Her back resting against the bark of the tree, the late afternoon spring sun graced her face, accenting her sharp cheekbones and making her dark hair shine. There was an occasional grey strand to be found in her raven black hair and Tenzin found he liked that she just let them be, unlike many other women.

The relaxed look on her face, eyes closed and the hint of a smile on her lips changed when she sensed his presence. Opening her eyes she turned to look at him and the corners of her mouth curled upwards as she greeted him. 

“What happened to you?” She had asked, motioning at his clothes. Instead of his usual robes he had been wearing loose beige pants and a white shirt.

“Jun challenged me to a training match and she may have caught me off guard and I fell in the pond.” He had shrugged and he had chuckled at the rumbling laughter that escaped her at that while she got up from under the tree.

He loved hearing her laugh so he had continued. “When I reappeared like this she remarked in awe that she had never before seen me in “normal” clothes and that I didn’t look half as cool now.”

Lin had chuckled. As she walked past him she had briefly touched his shoulder. “Well, I like you much better this way than as an airy airbender.”

He had turned around to follow her as she continued her way to the house, steps lazy and relaxed. And that was when he realised. As warmth and affection had burst from his heart at her comment.

She liked him for _him_. Just as he loved her for _her_. He couldn’t believe it had taken him so long to realise it. That it had taken so much pain and heartbreak. But he realised it now.

It had been why he had approached her more. And why he had pushed her every now and then to address the matter that always hang inbetween them. That of that faithful night and everything that came before.

Before that she had never once addressed it towards him or express how he had made her feel.

And he knew that if they wanted to be anything at all in the future, from just co parents to friends or anything else..she would have to tell him, and he would have to listen.

So he pushed and asked and reacted. But above all, he listened. And as he did, both during the easy and the hard conversations, he realised that every emotion he had ever known over the past decade felt heightened, sharpened when he felt it with her. His joy more joyful, his hurt more hurtful, his doubts, his fears, his laughter, his love...

At first, that had scared him. Worried him. Because what did that mean about the previous years, decades even?

Did it mean that he hadn’t been honest about his feelings. Hadn’t been sincere about his life? Hadn’t...loved...Pema?

Pema.

Pema was kind, sweet natured and...moderate. Moderate in everything, and in a world and a family that seemed to always be coloured by extremes, he found that he had loved that. He really did. 

She was a great mother. They had had a great life together. She could always tell, just with one look what was bothering him, just as he could tell in an instant when her back hurt due to carrying their kids and he would try to relief her pain.

Their love wasn’t the earth-shattering star-exploding, one moment you’re okay, the next you are head over heels in love- kind of love. And maybe that is why they struggled, had been separated - on a break - around the time everything with Lin happened; and had struggled again some years later.

But they did love each other and they loved their children and their family.

And nullifying their time spent together, their love, wouldn’t be fair to anyone, not Pema, not himself, not the kids, not even Lin.

Just as one can have more than one friend and like them in various degrees, one can love more than one person in a lifetime and do so in various degrees. The big difference being that, with love, one typically ties oneself to the first person one encounters and feels the most love towards .

And that is where things had gone wrong for him. He had not felt. He had only thought, and reasoned, and listened to his father and his expectations. And he had pushed away from the person he loved the most, choosing a life without love in it. A life where he hoped he would find someone that would fit the narrative his father had cut out for him better. To pursue a life with someone he loved as well - just not quite as deeply...

And then, when he had been all alone. He did what was expected of him; he moved on. And he found love again. Different love. With Pema.

It was a love that was less all consuming, allowing him to feel and think at the same time. Love and reason. Love and work. Work and have a family. Go to the park on days off. Live a... moderate life.

So moderate...so...boring, that Pema had gone to look elsewhere. And he had felt so hurt, so scared. Because hadn’t the deal been that by choosing Pema, by moving on, byliving up to his fathers expectations, he would be doing the right thing in a relationship for once? Wasn’t the deal that he would be happy and make someone else happy? By choosing the moderate? The sensible? The love that saved space for a clear mind when he thought about his wife? A love that still made his heart swell, but just not cloud his mind that much as well?

And then he had had dinner with Lin. And all reason went overboard. Because she took all of it. Clouded his mind. Made it feel like his heart would explode, with that sly smile she would have on her lips, that stern look, her curling black hair, her toned arms and green piercing eyes. Her sharp mind, her quick wit, her sense of humour and her way of looking after everyone but vehemently denying it if anyone pointed it out.

And with enough cactus juice he had spilled all of his thoughts, all of his feelings and they had spent the night and when he woke up he had gotten scared. He couldn’t ask Lin to be less than she was. But wasn’t that exactly what his father expected him to do? Wasn’t he expected to continue the Air nation? He couldn’t force that life onto Lin. That is why things had gone as they did. His father had lost everything and still managed to save the entire world. Then why couldn’t he make this one sacrifice? That of his true love, his soulmate. If not for himself, then for Lin. Who didn’t want to have children, as she had said so many times. And he respected that. But didn’t that mean he had to leave?

There weren’t many moments in which he had loathed himself as much as when he thought back to that very moment. How he had told her that it always was her but that it didn’t matter in reality. How he had left her, had effectively made her feel like she had to leave. Had not been there for his daughter to grow up.

He hadn’t realised how wrong he had been. Still just blinded by reason, duty, his father. Pema and him got back together not much later, agreeing to try again for the sake of their daughter and soon after, their second daughter growing in her womb.

When Lin disappeared he wanted to go after her. Turn every stone if needed, to find her. ButPema interfered. Told him that he had to choose between her and Lin and that he didn’t have to bother coming back, to her or to their one, soon two children. He couldn’t abandon his children like that. And a little voice in his mind told him that he wasn’t allowed to care this much about Lin anymore Anyways, he had lost that right the moment he had left her the second time. So he had stayed.

But they hadn’t found Lin. And from that moment on he made a conscious effort to push Lin out of his mind. He felt he had no right to claim her, not even in his thoughts. And as Toph had drawn the conclusion that Lin was probably alright but had decided actively to disappear, he tried to come to terms with her decision. He tried to respect it, as he thought that was the least he could do. And over time it became easier and he found a place in his heart to love Pema again, and his children filled the rest. And the void that his past with Lin had left...it had remained there, but he had learned to ignore it. Like it wasn’t even there.

And then... _everything_ had happened. And now he was here and she was in his arms. 

Lin.

It always _was_ Lin. It always would _be_ Lin. And even if she wouldn’t choose him.

It _is_ Lin. 


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The good news:   
> Update! It's all feelings and I indulged myself so I put Izumi, Jun, Katara, Tenzin and Toph moments in there, just because I can ;-). 
> 
> The not so good news: I think we are two maaaaybe three chapters away from the end to this fic.!
> 
> The better news: I do have an idea for a new fic already :)
> 
> So, enjoy and let me know how you feel about this chapter ^^!   
> Best,  
> Metope
> 
> P.s. So, I don't think someone is keeping track - I definitely am not - but I have the feeling that all my characters eat in this fic is vegetable soup, haha... :")

“But why!?”

“Izumi..”

“Don’t _Izumi_ me! I am the Fire Lord, I can do what I want. So tell me why can’t I attack Republic City!?”

“Gee, well, I don’t know. Maybe because they also got the Chief of Police, Amon has taken over the city, has declared bending illegal, and if it hadn’t been for Korra here, your son would have been _dead_ now!”

Izumi winced at Bumi’s harsh words. It wasn’t like him to be this hard and direct, and his words cut deep, for she knew they were true. They had thought that the arrival of Iroh’s division of the United Forces would solve things, but it hadn’t.

Her son had reassured her several times beforehand that he would be fine – this was his second year as a captain in the Forces. But aided by technology designed by the father of Korra’s friend, the Equalists had defeated the fleet in a matter of minutes. Iroh’s ship had been attacked and hit by an explosion, her son would indeed have drowned if it hadn’t been for Korra getting him out of the water.

And she knew that barging in with the Fire Nation Army would solve nothing, but fuel the support for the equalists instead.

“I am sorry.” Bumi apologized upon seeing her reaction. “But until we have a real plan, we are stuck here on Red Sand Island. No matter how angry you are about what they did to Lin or your son.”

“I know.” Izumi deflated as she let herself fall back in her chair and crossed her arms. “But let the record state that I. Am. _Livid_.”

“What record? Is there supposed to be someone keeping a record?”

“No Korra, it is used proverbially.” Tenzin supplied and the Avatar, who everyone had seen turn into an anxious teenager the moment she had been around the Fire Lord, nodded quickly and let out a nervous laugh. Who would have thought that the presence of _royal_ authority would finally instill the sense of healthy nervousness and respect towards her elders in Korra, that the rest of her family should have been able to instill just as easily, Izumi thought.

“So then the question is, what do we do?” Tenzin continued.

“Well...I have a suggestion.” Korra started hesitantly. “I think it is time I face Amon. I am sick and tired of hiding.”

Tenzin sighed. “Korra, that is not a good plan.”

Bumi nodded in agreement. “We need to stick together now.”

“No!” Korra said more forcefully this time and Izumi noticed a new type of determination in the Avatar’s eyes that she hadn’t seen there before. “I am done. I’m not going to wait for him to hunt me down and my gut is telling me that it is time to end this. On my terms.”

“This is not something you should be handling alone, Korra.” Tenzin countered.

“Mako is coming with me.” The girl countered and Izumi hid a smirk behind her hand. She understood now why Lin liked this girl but said she drove her crazy at the same time.

“I think we should trust the Avatar’s instinct. That is what my father always says.” Izumi added, and that seemed to be the winning argument.

When plans had been made for Korra and Mako’s departure that same evening, Izumi got up and made her way to Lin’s tent.

Now that Amon had taken over the city after having taken control over the police, there was no way that she, Tenzin or the children could go back to Lin’s home. So they had arranged some more tents to be put up and Lin had locked herself up in hers as soon as she could.

Inside, she found Lin on her back lying on top of the sheets of her bed, staring up at the ceiling while absentmindedly stroking her daughter’s back with the hand of the arm holding her. Jun was lying in her mother’s embrace, head resting on her mother’s shoulder and chest, staring up at the ceiling with an equal pair pensive green eyes. Izumi didn’t think there ever had been a moment in which the two looked more alike.

“What are the two of you thinking about so hard?” Izumi broke the silence.

Jun turned to look at her, but Lin did not. “Just thinking.” Jun shrugged before sitting up. “I assume you want to talk to mom?”

Izumi nodded with a gentle smile. “If you head to the main camp, your father will have some vegetable soup for you.”

Jun nodded and jumped off the bed, but not before pressing a kiss to her mother’s cheek. Lin hardly reacted to it.

As Jun passed Izumi, Izumi noticed dark circles under the girl’s eyes and a sad look in her green orbs. As they locked eyes Jun swallowed. “Mom hasn’t eaten all day. Nor did she have dinner yesterday.” She whispered before moving on and leaving the tent.

Izumi frowned and made a mental note to tell Tenzin that they needed to keep a closer eye on Jun. She sounded much too tired and much too grown up. And when had Jun stopped referring to Lin as _mama_ , instead adopting the more grown up _mom_?

“I won’t starve myself you know. I will eat…later..” Now came Lin’s voice from the bed. Her usual strong voice sounded fragile and exhausted.

“Will you?” Izumi countered and Lin nodded slowly, her eyes still trained on the ceiling of the tent.

“I know I worry her. I – I just need another moment… My mind needs another moment.”

Izumi sat down on the side of the bed next to her friend, placing a hand on the other woman’s upper arm.

“I feel like I need to...” An exhausted sigh. “- Need to process this first before I can do anything else.” Lin continued, her chest going up and down with every word as if a big stone was weighing down on it.

“That might take a while though, Lin..” Izumi tried carefully. “And you can’t go without eating.”

“I’m almost there.” Lin countered. “I know that.. It is just..” she huffed, then started again. “You know what it is? I was thinking about what if I hadn’t left, what if I hadn’t had Jun? Then I would have most likely become Chief of Police only to end up in the exact same situation as I am in now.”

“Oh Lin. Don’t –“ Izumi started, worrying that Lin’s reasoning would lead to her somehow blaming herself.

“ _But_ , “ Lin continued, “The big difference being that without Jun, I would have truly been only a metalbender and nothing else. Whereas now…now I know that I am more than that. I am…I am a _mother_. And I am a friend to people; I think I am even a _sister_ again. I know all that…so I think I am almost there…with processing…”

Izumi watched as her friend finally tore her gaze away from the ceiling and looked at Izumi instead. If Izumi had found her voice to sound fragile, the look her usually stubborn and steadfast friend gave her now, was a thousand times more fragile. She saw Lin searching for reassurance, affirmation that what she had just said was true, that she really was all that and that it really meant she was coming to terms with her situation. The silent conclusion behind it all being that Lin had a reason to go on; had many reasons in fact.

“Oh Lin, of _course_ you are all those things. You are _so_ much more than just your bending!” Izumi exclaimed, and before Lin could do anything about it, Izumi pushed herself more onto the bed and pulled her friend into a tight hug.

“I am so happy that I know you. I am so happy that you are my friend. Don’t ever doubt that.” She whispered, and after initially going rigid, she felt Lin melt into the hug and hug her back. “Besides, even if you had become Chief of Police, you _still_ would have been my friend and you _still_ would have been more than just your bending.”

“I am grateful that you are my friend too, Izumi.” Lin murmured, and Izumi mentally filed the confession along with the handful of other rare occasions in which Lin truly showed her friends how she felt about them.

“So, what do you say about some vegetable broth?” Izumi said when she had let go of Lin again.

Lin who sat upright now nodded but then hesitantly added, “Could you maybe ask if someone can bring a bowl here? I- I really don’t want to see anyone yet. They’ll just stare and make me feel worthless all over again.”

Izumi gave her a pointed look, as to say that there was no need to to ever feel worthless. But then she nodded – the insecure voice in Lin’s mind would always be louder than that of reason and asking her to come to terms with her own situation _and_ to face the others all in one evening would be too much.

“I will. And I will also send your daughter back here for an early night. She looks exhausted..”

Lin winced and nodded. “She worries – and all some of these tents hold all sorts of electromagnetic devices, which of course aren’t stopped by the tent’s fabric, so she is completely overwhelmed here. I would have bent her a metal dome or something in different circumstances, but here I am…” Lin shrugged. “Pretty useless.”

Izumi quickly shook her head. “Not useless at all! I don’t want you saying that again. We’ll think of something to help Jun. And let’s hope Korra succeeds tonight and this might all be over by tomorrow and you can return home.”

To Lin’s questioning look Izumi explained, “Korra is facing Amon tonight.”

“Alone!? Is that really a good idea?” Lin exclaimed and Izumi nodded.

“That was what we thought first too. But she _is_ the Avatar, and if her instinct tells her that she needs to seek him out, than we should follow that.”

Lin nodded pensively. “Follow the Avatar’s instinct. Just like Uncle Zuko always said….fair enough.”

Izumi smiled as Lin referred to her father’s words. “Exactly.”

“Well,” Lin sighed. “Fingers crossed then…”

..

Naturally, nothing of what Korra’s “Team Avatar” had planned went as it was supposed to go, but the net result of the next day was in fact that Amon was defeated. Albeit because he blew his own cover when he had landed in the ocean and would have drowned if he hadn’t used his waterbending – but still. The other net result was that Korra now too had lost her bending – safe for her _airbending_ which had finally kicked in after her other three elements had been nullified.

Disheartened and equally demoralized as Lin had been – still was, actually – the group drafted a plan on how to find a way to get their bending back. Thus, saying goodbye to Izumi, Bumi and Iroh who stayed behind to deal with the remnants of the Equalist attack in Republic City, Tenzin, Lin, the children and Korra and her friends made their way to the South Pole, to the only two people they hoped would be able to help them.

“Toph!”, “Grandma!” Tenzin and Jun exclaimed in surprise upon seeing not Katara or Kya, but Toph standing at the Southern Water Tribe docks to great them, and Lin watched as Jun jumped off the ship and ran to give the older woman a hug – despite the latter’s mocked protests.

Bolin, Korra’s most _foolish_ friend nearly fainted upon seeing Toph, which made Lin feel even more annoyed than she already was, having spent the better part of the past 48 hours with those teenagers on a ship while feeling tensed over the uncertainty if Katara or Kya would be able to help.

She followed last when everyone finally moved to make their way to Katara’s practice. Her vision having been blocked by the others – why were Korra’s friends so tall? – she was surprised to find her mother still standing there when the others have left.

They just stared at one another for the longest time. Toph’s face unreadable, while Lin was sure that all her fears and insecurities were clearly visible on her own. She wasn’t a bender anymore and they wouldn’t know if she would ever be again. What did that make of her in her mother’s eyes? Who had always been proudest of her when she was bending?

It was as if Toph could read her mind.

“At the risk of sounding sappy..” The old woman croaked out, “You will _always_ be my daughter, and I will _always_ love you. Bending be damned.”

Lin gasped, then choked on a sob as unexpected tears filled her eyes. Carefully having rebuilt her mental resilience after having broken down in Tenzin’s arms, she now crumbled again. And this time it were her mother’s arms that caught her and held her.

“I feel _so lost_ without it.” She confessed. “Even when I lived in the Fire Nation I held onto my earthbending, because I don’t feel _whole_ without it. And now it is gone..”

“Let’s hope Sugar Queen can work her magic and restore your bending.” There was a cracking in Toph’s voice that Lin had only heard a handful of times before – when her mother was fighting her own emotions.

“And if aunt Katara doesn’t?” She asked in a small voice.

“Then you will still be a killer Ambassador; and a Beifong; and my daughter; and a rocking mother to that Fireball of yours….And then I will not rest until I have found every, single Equalist and have made them _pay_.” Gone was the crack in Toph’s voice, back was the fighting spirit and Lin was incredibly grateful in that moment for having such a strong mother.

“Deal.” Lin sighed, and as they parted, Lin could see that her mother’s eyes were watery, just like her own.

“Now, let’s get inside before we find our dead here outside in this freezing cold.”

..

They agreed that Katara should first try to restore Korra’s bending. As the Avatar her connection to the elements could possibly be easiest to access.

The waiting was excruciating.

“If gran gran can’t do it, I won’t bend anymore either.” Jun muttered at some point.

“No you won’t.” Lin gently chastised her daughter. “You have to bend _extra_ , bend for the both of us.” That earned her a small smile from Jun. Looking her daughter over, Lin wondered when Jun had started to grow up. Two more years and she would be as old as her own mother had been when she had joined Aang on his travels. And here Lin was still worrying each time Jun would go home from school all by herself. With good reason, if she said so herself, but still.. Her daughter was not just a child anymore. Her eyes looked wiser, and some of the chubbiness in her face had disappeared.

“I love you, Pebble.”

“I love you too mom.” Jun smiled, before pressing a kiss on her mother’s cheek and skipping towards her siblings who were playing a game with Korra’s friends in another room.

And thus the waiting continued, while Kya and Katara were inside the healing room with Korra.

Toph was pacing the room, Tenzin sat on the couch and she herself had been staring out the window for a while now. Feeling her legs starting to tire, however, Lin turned to look for a place to sit.

Her options were an empty chair, or the couch. And suddenly not caring anymore, she allowed her craving for comfort and warmth to take over and let herself fall down on the couch next to Tenzin.

Before Tenzin could say or do anything – like jumping up to give her some space, typically something for him to do just that one time she didn’t want him to – she leaned to her right, so that she was leaning against him, before slowly lowering her head and letting it rest on top of his shoulder. All without a word and without looking at him.

She felt him holding his breath for a moment, could practically hear his brain trying to process what she was doing, before he slowly exhaled again and moved his left arm out from in between them, before carefully wrapping it around her, his hand curling around her left shoulder.

She saw her mother momentarily pause her pacing as she sensed the two of them so close together, before she continued her march again without saying a word.

They sat like that for at least another hour before the door to the healing room finally opened again.

Lin tensed in anticipation as she lifted her head from Tenzin’s shoulder and Tenzin pulled his arm away from her, both sitting up straight, eager to find out what the verdict would be.

The sad looks on Katara and Kya’s faces and the broken look of Korra told them enough however.

An involuntary sob escaped Lin, the sound drawing the attention from the kids in the other room.

Jun was on the couch, wrapping her arms around her mother in an instant, vouching that she would indeed bend for the both of them, and that she was still the best mother in the whole wide world. Tenzin leaned forward, burying his face in his hands as he processed the news, and Toph punched a hole in the wall before growling she was going for a walk.

The others tried to comfort Korra, but the young girl brushed their well-meant comments away before running out of the house. And Lin could not blame her. If it hadn’t been for Jun – who was anxiously studying her every move, sensing that Lin was only barely holding herself together in that moment – she would have done the same.

The teenagers went after Korra, while Tenzin and Kya sensed Lin was loosing it and took the kids out of the room. And just like that Lin was left alone with Katara.

“Looks like you could use a healing bath.”

“If you couldn’t fix Korra, I hardly think the experience with me will be any different.” Lin bit out.

“Healing baths can also be used as a way to help someone relax and let go of stress.”

“I am too angry to be sensible enough to agree with you.”

Without warning a body of glowing water suddenly wrapped as a headband around Lin’s head. The relief it gave made her let out a sigh.

“Still too angry?” Katara asked when she had bent the water back into the flask attached to her hip again.

“Fine.” Lin sighed, following her aunt into the healing room.

Katara worked silently, leaving it to Lin to decide if she wanted to speak or not. She did not.

She just allowed herself to give into the treatment, the warm, healing water.

At some point Katara started to softly hum a gentle tune, rhythmically moving the water on the melody. And only once she pressed a tissue against Lin’s cheeks, did the younger woman realize that she had been crying.

Looking up in surprise at Katara, the waterbender smiled. “Tears of stress and frustration. It’s good that you’re letting them out. Getting rid of them is part of the healing process.”

“I don’t know what I would do without you, aunt Katara. You always have my back, always had, even when I was little.” Lin sighed.

“I think you have shown that you can do perfectly well without me in your life. For seven years you did, to be exact.” Katara countered and Lin blushed.

“Well, you know what I mean. Just – thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me, sweetheart. You are just as much a daughter to me as Kya is. You were before you and Tenzin got together, and you remained it after my son decided to be a fool.”

Catching on to Katara’s criticism of her son, Lin chuckled. “Weren’t we all fools.”

“Safe for my husband, no one as much as he was back then…I will not say a single bad word about dear Pema, may the spirits have her soul. They loved each other a lot. But I know true love when I see it. And theirs was love, but no _true_ love.”

Lin let silence descend in the room before as she mulled over the implications of what Katara had left unsaid. “He isn’t a fool anymore.” She finally muttered.

“Is that so?” Katara asked and Lin noticed how she tried her voice to sound neutral, but curiosity still shone through.

“Yes..” Lin replied, pondering what next to say which would prove her point but wouldn’t cause Katara to jump to any wrong conclusion. “He – he was willing to lose his bending if it meant keeping me out of the hands of Amon. He would _never_ have done that back in the day – Or maybe he would have, but it would have had to have been under much greater duress than that we were in now.”

Now it was Katara’s turn to remain silent for a while.

“He has indeed changed. A lot – and for the better.” The waterbender eventually agreed. “I am happy he was able to show you that. It is nice to be able to see that…since he will always be in your life as Jun’s father…”

Lin noticed how Katara was choosing her words carefully, not wanting to make any assumptions or suggesting that she was hinting on something; instead referring to Tenzin only as the father of her daughter.

“That is true.” Lin found herself agreeing before closing her eyes again and leaning back into the bath, while ignoring the little voice in the back of her mind asking her if that is really all she saw Tenzin as..


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> So here it is! The moment many of you have been waiting for: it is LinZin time, FINALLY! This also means that this was scariest chapter for me to write of this entire fic, because I really hope that I did them justice, and that you will like what I wrote!  
> So please do let me know! 
> 
> As for the length of this story...I think one more (long) chapter and then an epilogue :")...
> 
> All the best,
> 
> Metope

In the days that followed, while Katara and Kya continued to restore Korra’s bending – to no avail; and while Lin continued to try not to get her hope up – also to no avail – Lin found to her surprise, that the person with whom she found the most support and from whom she could draw the most strength, was not her mother or Katara, but _Tenzin_ of all people.

She noticed that he had been studying her carefully every day to see what she was doing and to decide if he could offer her company when she didn’t want to be alone, a listening ear when she needed to vent, someone to confide in and talk with when she needed another perspective than her own; or someone who would make himself scarce if she was in no mood to talk to him or anyone for that matter.

It was a degree of caring for her and of showing her that he _saw_ her, that he really was there for her and that she could take her time coming to terms with everything that was going on, that Lin had hardly ever seen in Tenzin when they still had been together. And none of the others seemed to be able to offer her that same balance of calm, comfort, courage and strength.

Lin had been worried that they would all be stuck now in Katara’s home – which wasn’t small, but definitely couldn’t harbor four kids, four teenagers and three extra adults. Luckily however, it was soon decided that Jun and Lin could stay with Kya, while Korra’s parents took in the teenagers – thank the spirits for that, teenagers were annoying and if it were up to Lin, Jun could skip that stage, Lin did not envy her mother who was already staying with Katara. Lin and Jun were staying with Kya, which brought its own set of challenges, as Kya turned out to be someone who did not particularly care for tidying things up.

On more than one occasion that week, it caused her to flee the messy hut for a brisk winter walk. And on more than one occasion she would run into Tenzin. Just like she did that afternoon.

“Running from your kids again?” She greeted him.

“Possibly..” The airbender shrugged helplessly. “They are just…a lot…”

“They’re airbenders.” Lin countered.

“I was never like that.”

“No, that’s true.” Lin nodded. “You were calmer, more observant. Like Jun is too – I like that about you two.”

That earned her a smile from Tenzin. “I like that about the two of us as well.”

Lin chuckled, before she looked up at the clear sky. “So, what do you say? Do we dare make it a longer walk this afternoon? It doesn’t look like there will be any snow anytime soon?”

Tenzin followed her gaze and when he had established as well that the clear blue sky didn’t show the slightest hint of any incumbent, heavy, grey cloud filled with snow, he nodded in agreement and they headed in the direction of one of the trails.

As they walked, they exchanged pleasantries or walked in a comfortable silence, and Lin realized that it had been a long time since she had truly enjoyed a walk as much as she did now. Just having nothing but snow and mountains surrounding her, with complete silence surrounding them that only they could decide to break by speaking, gave her a sense of calm and being in control that she hadn’t felt recently.

As they continued, neither noticed the dark clouds gathering behind them. Only when they turned to head back again did they realize that their earlier predictions had been to optimistic.

“Do you think that will cause us problems?” Lin carefully asked, but Tenzin shrugged.

“Let’s just pick up our pace and hope we get out of the mountains before that cloud reaches us.”

As they went down, they could already feel the wind picking up and the temperature drop as a result of it. The upper layer of snow that had been soft and with a good texture up until then, changed into snow mixed with ice as they walked, making the trail a lot more difficult to navigate.

Tenzin could use his airbending whenever he was about to slip to propel himself into the sky and back on the trail again, and under usual circumstances Lin would have used her bending as well. The fact that she couldn’t now caused the by now familiar feeling of helplessness and immense irritation to take over again; making her feel hot and sweaty despite the cold.

Tenzin had moved to walk in front of her now, offering her a hand to help her down particularly slippery parts of the trail. When the wind started to be mixed with flakes of snow and ice, their vision became blurred as well. The comfortable silence that had been between them on the way up, had now been replaced by a tension instead. Tenzin’s grip around Lin’s hand grew stronger and stronger with every new ledge they had to jump off, until eventually, he didn’t let go of her hand at all anymore, instead just leading her down the path.

In any other circumstance, Lin would have told Tenzin that she did not need him to lead the way for her, but now, without her bending, she was actually incredibly grateful, more so even for the fact that his broad shoulders shielded her a little from the harsh wind. Then again, in any other circumstance, Tenzin probably wouldn’t have acted like he did now, precisely because he _knew_ Lin could hold her own.

Suddenly she felt Tenzin pull her to the left, and only once the snowflakes and wind impairing her vision and hurting her skin were abruptly gone, did she register that Tenzin had found a cave carved out in the side of the mountain that they could use to shelter.

“I think we need to wait until the worst is over. The next part of the trail is even steeper and I don’t think it is responsible to continue. The snowflakes are so heavy with ice and falling so heavily that I can’t bend it all away.” He was panting slightly from the exertion.

Lin nodded. “Let’s just hope it passes soon. At least we are halfway there already. – Thanks to..you..” She added half hesitantly.

Still not knowing how to take a compliment, Tenzin shrugged and looked away as he mumbled. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

They stood like that for a moment, Tenzin staring at his feet and Lin stealing glances at him while she pretended to look outside – before she decided to break the spell. “So, you happen to have anything on you with what we can make a fire?”

When Tenzin shook his head apologetically she sighed before sliding into a sitting position against the wall of the cave, bringing her knees to her chest, “I thought so. Then let’s _really_ hope that this doesn’t last long.”

Tenzin mirrored her movements as he went to sit next to her, making sure to leave some space between them.

“I hate this, you know that? I don’t think I have ever hated anything as much as I hate being this helpless right now.” Lin said after a while. “If I still had my bending, I could have just used seismic sense and get us out.”

“You really think I would let you take off your shoes and walk barefoot in this weather?” Tenzin remarked and Lin chuckled.

“ _Letting_ me, hm? I don’t think I need your permission to use my bending.”

“Of course you do not need my permission. But since I happen to know that you actually have quite delicate feet with ten lovely toes, I am invested in keeping it that way, rather than seeing them turn blue and then worse.” Tenzin countered with a smirk and it caused Lin to instantly arch her eyebrow in response.

“That is seriously the weirdest comment I have ever received about my appearance. Delicate feet? I’m an earthbender, you know that right?”

Tenzin just shrugged, grin still on his face. “For an earthbender they are quite delicate.”

“This almost feels like an insult.”

Tenzin mock gasped. “I would _never_.”

That finally elicited a genuine laugh from Lin as she raised her hand to casually bend a pebble to playfully throw to his head.

Her laugh immediately died down, turning into a shocked gasp as she pulled her hand in and hid it between her knees again when of course nothing happened.

Eyes trained on her knees, trying hard to school her features while her face wanted nothing more than to contort in frustration, she said nothing and waited for Tenzin to make fun of her or pity her.

“Lin – “ He started, his tone softer and comforting. Pity then.

“I forgot – that’s all.” She cut him off, her voice barely more than a whisper and to her frustration her vision started to swim with tears. She used to almost never cry, but in the past two weeks she was sure she nearly cried once a day - pathetic.

“Lin, look at me..” Tenzin coaxed, and something in his voice made her give in. She bit her lower lip as she was met by calm grey eyes, that did not shine with pity nor were they gloating. Instead, there was understanding in them – and Lin had no idea how this man, whose entire life had been about his bending and the nation that he represented, could understand something as fundamentally the opposite to that as losing one’s bending, but he did.

“How can you…” She started to ask but Tenzin already replied before she could finish her question.

“When dad died, I was at my wit’s end. Not just by grief, but also by everything I had suddenly become over the course of 24 hours. From just the son of Avatar Aang, the last airbender, _I_ had become the last airbender. Suddenly _I_ had become the one to lead the Air Nation, to decide what was right and what was wrong. I freaked out completely, and I – I somehow blocked my own chi and just like that I couldn’t bend anymore. And this is nothing like what happened to you, once I finally got help a guru was able to fix it, so it fades in comparison actually. And I only _thought_ I couldn’t bend anymore because I was a foolish, childish idiot at the time. But in that period in which I thought I had lost my bending, I really _believed_ that I did and I have never felt more empty, alone and out of control than in those days. So again, it is nothing like what you are going through now, Lin. But the feeling of utter disappointment, betrayal even, when you forget for a moment that you cannot bend, only for reality to crash back into you twice as hard when you try, _that_ I understand.”

Lin frowned and for several moments there was only silence between them as she processed what Tenzin had just told her. “We were still together when your dad died, I haven’t noticed anything of the sorts happening to you.”

“I didn’t tell anyone, not even my siblings. I even only told mother once I had gone a month without my bending already and I had tried everything and had become convinced I had lost my airbending for good.”

Lin shook her head, an annoyed expression settling on her face. “You aren’t making this up just to make me feel better, are you? Because if you are, that is a seriously shitty thing to do.” She snapped.

Tenzin remained unfazed however. “We weren’t exactly seeing much of each other at the time, and I made a conscious effort to stay out of your way during the whole ordeal. Remember our planned trip to Fire Fly Island? I canceled it because there was no way that I was going to keep this a secret from you if it was just the two of us.”

“That is ridiculous. Why didn’t you just tell me? Or anyone else in the family for that matter, for we indeed weren’t in the best of place anymore already by then, I give you that.”

“I was ashamed,” Tenzin sighed, “the last airbender losing his bending the moment his father isn’t there to guide him anymore doesn’t exactly look good. I still hoped I would find a way to fix things and no one would have to know – it is stupid, I know.”

“Well, what is _stupid_ is that our parents, for all their great, impossible expectations and standards for us, completely overlooked the part where they also have to allow us to become our own person. If they hadn’t, you wouldn’t have been so lost probably.” Lin replied cynically, before turning so that she could look at Tenzin better as a wave of anger suddenly washed over her.

“Spirits, Tenzin, I thought we didn’t go on that holiday because we had had an argument _again_ about having children and I thought you didn’t want to go anymore after I told you I thought we were going on a vacation, not a baby-making-getaway! I have always thought of that particular argument as the beginning of the end, and now you tell me it was because you were _so_ stuck-up that you had stressed yourself into a chi block!?”

Tenzin blinked perplexed at her sudden outburst before looking away in shame. “I think…I think there are many reasons why our relationship was at that time where it was – but my whole attitude certainly didn’t help – and honestly, these days, when I think back on it, I just want to strangle my younger self and yell at him to stop being such a spoiled, naïve, insecure fool and grow up, own my own life and be the person you deserved to have as your partner, rather than the narcissistic prick that I was.”

Now, _that_ Lin hadn’t expected and it took her several moments – her mouth opening, than closing again – before she knew what to say, while she tried her hardest to ignore her heartbeat that seemed to have picked up a beat or two in speed.

“I must say that I didn’t mind hearing that..” She started eventually, having decided to go with teasing first, as way of deflating some of the tension between them. “But I also feel the need to say that it wasn’t _all_ you – I at the time was completely incapable of communicating about my feelings or my thoughts as well…and, again…the fact that the two of us managed to live such separate realities of the same life alongside one another, while our family was all over us, _all_ the time, makes me wonder, if _they_ as an independent third party didn’t see it, how on _earth_ were we supposed to?”

Tenzin scoffed, eyes focused on the wall opposite of them. “Can you imagine if someone would have just sat us down and told us how it is? It would have saved us so much heartbreak…”

“And so many headaches..” Lin nodded. “I mean, every time I think about what could have been, I realize that in that scenario, I wouldn’t have had Jun and you wouldn’t have had Jinora, Ikki and Meelo. I wouldn’t have met Mitsuki and Sora, and Tadao; you wouldn’t have got to know Pema…We would have been completely different people from who we are today. And –“

“-And yet, you wonder..” Tenzin finished her sentence in understanding and he turned to look at Lin now, his eyes serious and focused on her. “I feel the same...and you know what? Recently I have come to the conclusion that I am allowed to feel both. I am allowed to feel happy about having met Pema, having loved her, having four kids, a family – just as you are allowed to feel happy about Jun, about how far you’ve come in the relationship with your mother and sister, about your relationship with Tadao – although I regret having contributed to the cause of you leaving Republic City, for which I think I can never apologize enough. But at the same time, I have realized that all of that, does not have to negate the fact that I also _utterly_ regret that I pushed you away and let you go. That I regret that we broke up in the first place, as the underlying problems had so little to do with how I _felt_ about you, and so much more with what others expected of me, which shouldn’t be a factor at all when it comes to the person you truly love.”

Lin gasped at that, Katara’s words of earlier that week about true love coming back to her mind. And Tenzin was referring to their younger selves when he referred to her as the person he truly loves, she knew that. But could it be… And as she stared at the man in front of her, the past four years in which Tenzin had been back in her life crashed into her in full force.

Shared dinners, shared walks, shared laughs, shared worries over their daughter, shared hardships, shared arguments. The realization that Tenzin had changed; the realization that Tenzin was a _good_ father to his three kids and now also to Jun. The realization that Tenzin no longer put himself first, he put his children first. The realization that Tenzin put _her_ first when he thought she needed it. The realization that Tenzin truly regretted his past actions. The realization that Tenzin also truly _understood_ what he had done to her. The realization that she could yell at him and accuse him of how he hurt her, without him coming up with poor excuses, owning his faults instead. The realization that he had almost seemed to worry more for her than for his own wife when they had gotten sick during the pandemic – something Lin had not allowed herself to think about but which now did not let itself be pushed to the side right now. The realization that Tenzin no longer asked of her to be less than she was; that he no longer asked her to be someone else nor did he himself try to be someone he was not. The realization that he _got_ her, that he _understood_ her, that he _cared_ for her.

The realization that they had grown so close again over those past four years, that they had worked through their issues which at the beginning had seemed too big to ever get past. But which they had managed to do regardless. And Tenzin had worked _hard_ to get to this point, Lin realized now. Since for her, reconnecting with Tenzin was about waiting, about healing old wounds through time and through new experiences and memories, it was a relationship that revolved around Jun, and anything else was secondary to that. That meant that if this was to change, Tenzin would have had to do the work. Tenzin would have had to be the one creating these new experiences and memories, because she was not going to be looking for them. And he _had_ done it.

And now, now that he had made his confessions and was looking at her in earnest, Lin saw something in his eyes that wasn’t there when he looked at other people, something that hadn’t even been there when she had seen him looking at Pema. It was that calmness, that warmth with what he would always only look at her, back when they had been together. It was _love_. Tenzin loved her. He still did…or maybe he did again.

And she felt ridiculous over the warmth that spread through her upon _that_ particular realization. Because hadn’t she been suppressing her own budding feelings for the past year or so? Or had she not even been aware of them? Since their connection had grown so steadily, so unbeknownst to the both of them over those four years rather than announcing itself loud and clear like it had in the past, and like it had never quite done with Tadao?

“D-do you..still…love me?” She eventually whispered, but it was as if she had screamed the bold question through the cave.

And while she saw Tenzin’s face turn bright red despite the cold, she braced herself for a possible rejection in which he would say that _that_ is not what he had meant, that she had made it all up in her mind, or worse: that he would always love her but not in _that_ way.

But the airbender, cheeks still bright red and eyes trained on his feet in front of him, proved her wrong entirely. “I don’t think that I _still_ love you. I think that I love you _again_ , Lin. I only realized it myself recently, but as a matter of fact, I am so _in_ love with you that I am pretty sure your mother already knows as my heart has been beating as if I were still a school boy every time I saw you this past week.”

“I see…” It was all she knew how to say, because, again, she had not expected such a clear and honest answer. The changed Tenzin was most definitely also a more confident Tenzin in this department.

“ _But_ –“ Tenzin quickly said, and he raised his head again so that he could look at Lin, eyes now frantic and pleading. “That means in no way that things have to be different between us. I won’t ask anything of you. I have no right to do that. This does not have to change anything and I don’t want you to think that you have to do anything or that y–“

On impulse, Lin placed her hands in front of her knees, moving her weight to lean on it before pressing her lips firmly against Tenzin’s. It was a short, chaste kiss to silence the rambling airbender and when she broke the kiss she saw it had had the desired effect as he looked dumbfounded at her.

Now it was her turn to be honest. “I – I don’t know if I want it to change…I don’t know _yet_ anyways, but I do know that all the things you said in this cave today, were the most honest, heartfelt and kind words you have ever spoken to me. And…and my feelings for you have definitely changed. I don’t think I love you _still_ either, but I think I _could_ be starting to loving you _again._ And uhm- that is worth investigating, so…so I’m going to kiss you again, alright?” She rambled. She never rambled, but now she rambled. And when Tenzin gave her the slightest hint of a nod, eyes still wide and cheeks still bright red, Lin leaned in again.

This time, Tenzin responded to the kiss by moving his own lips against hers. And as their kiss deepened Lin felt all her thoughts and worries eb away. His kiss was familiar yet different. Just as he was. But when his hands traveled up to cup her face, muscle memory kicked in as she pulled herself closer into him.

When they ran out of air and broke the kiss, neither of them moved, their faces still mere inches away as they held each other’s gaze, as they were searching and finding clues on how the other was feeling now.

“So we are taking things slow then.” Tenzin said and Lin nodded.

“Slow sounds good.”

“Then slow it is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ps. I just also uploaded the first chapter of my new fic! --> https://archiveofourown.org/works/29623332 It's called "The Seven Truths; or how Lin Beifong found her way back home" - would be very honored if you would check that one out as well ^^!


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all,
> 
> there you have it! The last 'real' chapter, only an epilogue to go! I can't believe we have come this far, I will save the emotional author's note for the epilogue. Here I just want to say, for those who haven't seen it yet: I already started a new LinZin Fic! It's called The Seven Truths; or how Lin Beifong found her way back home. https://archiveofourown.org/works/29623332/chapters/72824865   
> Would be very grateful if you would check it out and let me know what you think of it ^^. 
> 
> As for this chapter...some of you know already that I had meant to give Tenzin a harder time when Lin first returned, but I stupidly forgot to write it that way (it was a bit of a messy time in my life :)). With this last full chapter I tried to right that missed opportunity just a liiiiittle bit.
> 
> So let me know what you think, and curious to hear your thoughts on what the epilogue could be like ;).  
> Best and thanks!!
> 
> Metope

When Lin and Tenzin had finally been able to make their way back from their storm-overcome-walk, they had been just in time to prevent their family from going off on a rescue party.

Cold to the bone however, they entered Katara’s hut, where Jun set to work to make the fire warmer for the two of them and Kya showed up with several blankets.

Surrounded by so many people again, for a moment, Lin wished she was alone with Tenzin in the cave again. The thought was quickly pushed out of her mind however as she watched her family make a fuzz over them. Five years ago she wouldn’t have believed anyone telling her that her family would ever go through so much effort as they did right now just for her. But they _did_.

Looking at them, Lin noticed someone was missing however.

“Where is Korra?”

Now everyone stalled their movements.

“Sh-she ran out, uhm, after mother told her that there is nothing left she could do…” Kya muttered.

“No, you can’t! You _have_ to keep trying! You are the best healer there is!” Lin blurted out in shock before she could help herself and she averted her gaze away from her family as she saw the pitying looks they sent her.

Next to her she felt Tenzin’s hand move over her own, covered by their blankets so that no one could see. His hand curled around hers and his thumb starting to rub soothing circles on the back of her hand. It was oddly comforting but did nothing to stop the feeling of utter desperation sinking in her stomach.

“We will find another way.” Toph said in a determined voice.

Just then the door of Katara’s home burst open by a strong gust of wind, showing Korra standing in the doorway, a flame in one hand, stones circling each other in the other.

They all stared at her with mouths agape as the teenager entered and closed the door.

“I talked to Avatar Aang.” The girl explained wide eyed, still in shock herself. “He gave me my bending back _and_ he told me how to do the same to others.”

Lin’s hand turned around so that she could curl around Tenzin’s hand now and she gave it a tight squeeze as she tried to keep the anticipation of what this could mean for her under control.

“Korra that is amazing!” Kya was the first to speak and as if on cue the other teenagers in the room jumped up and pulled Korra in a group hug to congratulate her.

The girl allowed it all to happen with a gentle smile, but her eyes remained focused on Lin.

“What do you say. Wanna try?” She asked when her friends had let go of her again.

Lin nodded breathlessly.

“Alright. Please come and kneel before me.” Korra directed her.

“What? Here? Shouldn’t we go to a more ceremonial place for this?” Tenzin asked and Lin sent him a glare.

“For whom? The otter penguins?”

Turning red again Tenzin nodded. “You’re right. You shouldn’t have to wait any longer.”

They all watched with holding breaths as Lin got up from the couch and then kneeled in front of Korra. Her whole body was trembling and Lin couldn’t tell if it was from the cold or because of how scared she felt.

If this didn’t work, if even the Avatar couldn’t restore her bending, then that was it. Her last resort gone.

Placing one hand on Lin’s shoulder and the other on her forehead, Korra closed her eyes and deeply breathed in and out. And then, as her eyes turned a fluorescent white, Lin felt an immense surge of power course through her.

The feeling went as fast as it had come, and as Korra’s eyes returned to normal, Lin stood up again.

She felt different. Familiar, like herself again, and therefore different from moments before.

“Well? Bend something, kiddo!” Toph exclaimed, not able to hold her curiosity any longer.

Lin turned, looking around the room she saw everyone looking at her with expectant eyes. Everyone but Tenzin. In his eyes she found understanding again. He understood that she was afraid to try. What if she was wrong and was just imagining that she felt different whereas nothing had happened?

Sending her an almost imperceptible nod, she suddenly felt less worried however. Even if she couldn’t bend, she had her family, she had Jun. Tenzin just reminded her of that. Maybe...just maybe she would also have Tenzin. She would make her mind up about that later.

Taking in a deep breath, Lin purposefully walked towards the door, pulling it open and marching outside, the others following suit. She directed her attention towards the rocks in the sea that around this time of year weren’t entirely covered in snow - calling it summer wasn’t right, but there was a little less ice.

With another deep breath in and out, she moved into a bending stance and lifting her arms as high as she could, next, she pushed them downwards, away from her and up again in one swift move. And as she did this, a perfectly rectangular carved out piece of earth rose and appeared on the surface of the ocean.

The rock only disappeared when Lin lowered her arms again. They all watched intently as the sea claimed its space again, before Meelo suddenly called out a loud ‘Yahooooo!’.

Startled, Lin turned around, but she couldn’t help but mirror the wide grin she saw on her family’s and Korra and her friends’ face.

“You did it!” Lin exclaimed to Korra, and for the teens it was the most enthusiastic they had ever seen her. Lin’s own smile quickly grew into a scowl therefore when the teens and Kya and the kids all moved in to give her a group hug.

“Come on everyone.” Tenzin chuckled. “Give Lin some space will you?”

The rest of the day was spent by the others making plans how to organize it so that Korra could restore the bending of all other victims of Amon.

Lin however, spent her time inside, curling and unfolding the metal cutlery with what she had been supposed to eat the dinner that was still standing before her, now cold.

All the while she was going over her this remarkably eventful day and the conversation of earlier with Tenzin. Her intuition told her to give Tenzin a chance, her ratio told her to be careful, she had been burnt before – _twice_.

There really only was one way to find out if she would get burnt a third time, or that a third time would actually turn out to be the charm, was there?

With everyone else distracted and elsewhere, Lin didn’t mind when Tenzin went to sit opposite her and put his hands over hers, stilling them so that she had to stop her bending

“I know all you want to do now is bending, but please eat something too?” His eyes were looking at her with warmth.

“My food is cold.” Lin protested and she grinned triumphantly when Tenzin got up with a loud sigh and took her food to the adjacent kitchen to reheat it.

“Still bending?” Toph who had reentered Katara’s apartment asked upon seeing Lin, who had immediately picked up the cutlery again, as soon as Tenzin had left.

“Too much effort to bend the earth here, so metal it is.” Lin shrugged.

Her mother went to sit opposite of her, a relaxed smile on her face. “Well, don’t stop on my account. I am just happy you can bend again.”

“I thought you said it didn’t matter if I could bend or not.” Lin countered but the question was one to tease, not to accuse.

“It doesn’t.” Toph replied genuinely. “But it saves me the effort of having to hunt down the bastards who did this to you in the first place.”

Lin chuckled that, but abruptly let the cutlery fall down onto the table upon Toph’s next question. “So, you and Twinkletoes Junior are back together?”

“N- wha-how-“

“Really? After all these years you still have to ask me how I know? I can read your heartbeats and tell if you lie, remember?”

“Well, that Tenzin’s heartbeat is going crazy doesn’t say anything about me.” Lin countered and Toph just shook her head with amusement.

“Your heartbeat is going just as crazy, Badgermole. Just accept it, don’t fight it..” and with that the old woman left as abruptly as she came, right in time for Tenzin to return with her now steaming hot dinner.

“My mom knows.” Lin blurted out as soon as he sat down, and she continued when he sent her a non-understanding look. “You’re not the only one with a crazy heartbeat around the other apparently..”

An involuntary blush crept up her cheeks as Tenzin showed a pleased smirk at that. “Ha, you like me too!” He teased.

“I thought we had already had established that I _might_.” Lin replied coolly.

“But now we have scientific proof!”

Lin chuckled at Tenzin’s glee before her face grew serious again. “I am serious though Tenzin. I want this to go slow, especially before we tell anyone. The kids have to know first and I am not ready to tell them yet. It is bad enough mother knows.”

The airbender matched her expression as he nodded. “Of course, Lin. I agree. I don’t want to rush anything, not with you, not this time. We take all the time we need. _You_ take all the time you need. And until then we keep things to ourselves.”

Lin nodded relieved. For a moment she had worried Tenzin was getting carried away, but she saw he was really listening to her.

Back in Republic City, taking it slow translated into a secret date once a week. The blessing being that the people of the city had seen them together before too, just as friends, and thus they didn’t think any of it when the two of them were seen together in public. They made sure not to appear too close in public and only shared an occasional kiss when they were behind closed doors of either of their homes.

They were able to keep things up like this for three months. How it leaked to the press after that point that Councilman Tenzin and the Ambassador of the Fire Nation were back together again, was completely unclear to Lin – she would bet good money on it having been a jealous acolyte. But when she opened the newspaper one morning there it was, written in bold letters, accompanied by a picture of the two of them walking through the Republic City Central Park. The irony was that they weren’t even holding hands in the photo, although there certainly had been moments where they had taken more risk, and Lin quickly decided that they could just brush it off as a foolish rumor and be done with it.

It was an assumption she made based on the fact that she was sure the press would mainly want to know how their relationship had grown and if it had before or after Pema’s dead. All of them eager to spin stories about yearlong affairs and what nots, she was sure.

What Lin did not expect however, was for public opinion _not_ to collectively turn on her for once, but on _Tenzin_. Sure, some wrote that they had known all along that the two of them would get together. But the majority of the papers declared Tenzin an opportunist, undeserving of the love and forgiveness of Lin Beifong. What had he done to deserve it? They asked. Hadn’t he left her as a single mother alone?

The press giving them hell was exactly what Lin had always feared about their relationship. But now that it had happened – aside from the fact that Lin wasn’t quite sure how to even call what she and Tenzin were having at this moment – it caused a storm that paled in comparison to the attention she had received upon her return and it was not she or her daughter who was paying the price, but Tenzin. And, as much as she cared for Tenzin, and as much as she felt sorry for the hard time he was having, Lin had to admit that somewhere, deep down, it felt pretty good that for once. Finally there was a time where Tenzin was the one who wasn’t allowed to escape the problems and deal with it on his own time, but was the one forced to keep himself standing in public while suffering in silence.

However, her secret glee turned into downright irritation once the press’ criticism on Tenzin started to affect her too. Tenzin was handling it well, all things considered. In public he refrained from comments and on the one occasion that he did comment, it was only to emphasize that he fully owned his mistakes, regretted them immensely and that, ‘no he could _not_ confirm or deny that he was in a relationship with Ambassador Beifong, but that if he _was_ , he would make sure that she would be respected and that he would never ask her to be less than she was’, respecting Lin’s wish in that comment not to confirm anything to the press.

But due to the press, it has been practically impossible to see each other with it going unnoticed. And since they both agreed it was best not to be seen in public outside of a work context for the moment, they had gone three weeks without one another already before Lin had had enough.

Under the truthful cover of Jun having a sleepover with her siblings, Lin marched towards Air Temple Island, flog of nosy reporters in tow. Thankfully the ferry did not allow any of them on board, and so they were finally freed from the incessantly yelled questions once at sea.

The two adults were equally shocked when they saw one another. Tenzin because he did not expect her; Lin because of the state the airbender was in.

“Lin!”

“You look absolutely terrible.” She stepped past him into the house.

“Hello to you too.” Tenzin muttered, before greeting his daughter with more warmth.

“You _do_ look funny dad.” Jun pointed out seriously.

“That’s because he hasn’t been sleeping, and is up all night debating if those dumbass newspapers are right and that Aunt Lin is better off without him. Which obviously neither of you is, everyone can see that.” Jinora deadpanned from the living room In the typical fashion of a 14 year old.

“What?! Jinora!” Tenzin exclaimed indignantly, but the girl just shrugged. “It had to be said.”

“Yes dad, when _were_ you going to tell us that you’re together anyways by the way?” Ikki now popped up from the hallway.

“I - the - we-“ Tenzin stammered.

“I think it is wonderful, don’t get me wrong!” The girl gushed. “Aunt Lin is so cool, and Jun is practically living here half of the time already anyways!”

The girl was now jumping up and down through the room, whirling around her father and then around Lin who was trying her hardest to suppress the urge to turn around and go straight back home again, triggered by the airkids who were jumping to way too many conclusions all at once.

All the while Lin’s eyes stayed trained on Jun. Her daughter was observing the whole ordeal quietly: her father yelling at Jinora for being rude, Jinora challenging him and talking back at him, Ikki bending around the room and Meelo soon joining in. And then Jun’s eyes landed on her mother, and in them, Lin found nothing but calm and understanding. This was no news to Jun, Lin realized with a start.

“You knew too?” She voiced her thoughts. And the fact that this was the first time Lin was speaking caused everyone else to calm down and finally be quiet.

The firebender chuckled before jogging to her mom who was standing in the middle of the room.

“I could already tell when we were still on the South Pole, mom.” Jun laughed.

“I see..” Lin said perplexed as she looked down at her young daughter, arms wrapped around her waist in a hug and a look of trust and happiness in her eyes.

“Well, I think I have a lot to talk about with your dad then..” Lin sighed.

Understanding that was their cue, the kids willingly left the room.

“Huh, they’re all out in less than a minute. They’re really rooting for us, aren’t they?” Lin remarked sarcastically when they were finally alone in the living room.

“They’re standing behind the door listening though, aren’t they?” Tenzin asked.

“Oh yes they definitely are.” Lin confirmed before stomping her foot on the ground once and smirking when they heard a choral of muffled “ouches” coming from behind the door.

“Go play outside! I want to see all of you on the hill with the swing in one minute. I mean it!” Lin called to them and the two adults grinned widely with amusement at one another as they heard the protests coming from behind the door.

“I can’t even go that fast, mom! I am not an airbender you know!” Her daughter protested from behind the door.

“I am sure you can!” Lin countered in a no nonsense voice and she watched amused when they soon heard the back door slam shut and saw three kids travel to the hill on air scooters while Jun managed to get herself flying there by bending blue charged flames from her feet.

“I expected her to run there, but I guess this works too.” Tenzin replied surprised.

“That kid is going to be a handful two years from now. Especially if she teams up with Ikki and Jinora.” Lin shook her head.

“They’ll be unstoppable.” Tenzin agreed.

“And here I learn that you are planning on leaving me alone to deal with that.” Lin suddenly accused Tenzin as she turned to look at him.

“Wait what?” Tenzin asked confused before he caught on to what Lin referred to. “Oh! No! No don’t listen to what Jinora said!”

“So you _do_ sleep at night?”

“Well, I have had better nights...”

“I thought so, because again, you look terrible.” Lin remarked, crossing her arms. “Care to explain?”

Tenzin took his time to answer. First letting out a deep sigh before sitting down at the dinner table and gesturing for Lin to follow his example.

She gave a shake with her head. “I rather stand.” Sitting down made her feel more vulnerable in situations like these, in which a talk about feelings and emotions was imminent.

“They write that I hurt you in the past.” Tenzin started. “And that is true. They write that I chose Pema over you. And _that_ is true. They write that I abandoned you, left you alone as a single mother and that the fact that Pema and I were separated at the time doesn’t change that. And that is true too – And though I am surprised they only write about that no, as if that part of our story only truly hits them now-”

“They were too busy hovering over me and figuring out where I had been, the last time.” Lin nodded. “And though interesting this all is, I didn’t ask for a close reading of the newspapers.”

“I know, I know. But the point is.” Tenzin continued. “They write all these things, that they don’t really know anything about but that are true nonetheless. So if all their assumptions are true. Then what about their questions? If they wonder if I am not just choosing the easy way, choosing you because there is no one else. Is that true? When they ask if I would have done the same in the past, knowing the chances of an airbending child are slim, and they say they think I wouldn’t have. Is that true? When they wonder that I might not even love you but just the _idea_ of us together. Is that true? What if I am making the same mistake again, Lin? The same mistake of confusing that what others see and think and expect, to be the ideas and feelings of myself? What if I hurt you again in the process? What if this is my chance to wake up, and do right by you?”

Lin blinked once, then twice, then a third time while she tried to process this outburst of the man in front of her, completely stunned into silence by the sheer talent this man had for overthinking _everything_.

“Let me ask you this…” She finally spoke. “Do you love me?”

“Yes I do.” The answer followed immediately and she saw nothing but confidence in his eyes as he said it..

“Is that what you _think_ or what you _feel_?”

“It is a feeling, it is something I just _know_. But Lin - .”

“Can you explain it?”

The airbender frowned, then shook his head. “No, it is just…I just _know_.”

Lin arched an eyebrow. “Does that sound very rational to you?”

The airbender slowly shook his head, as he started to catch onto what Lin was getting at.

“This is why you are so amazing…” He breathed. “You are the only one who gets my overthinking.”

Lin chuckled. “That is because I am pretty good at it myself too, and in the past few years, there has been a certain airbender who always managed to put things in perspective.”

Tenzin nodded as he mirrored her smile. “I _am_ doing it right this time. I’m going by feeling, and by wanting to do what is good for _you_ , what makes _you_ happy and in return will make me happy. And only if I listen to the newspapers and their questions, would I be going by what others think. Which is what I should _not_ be doing.”

Lin shrugged. “If you say so.” She teased.

Tenzin ignored the teasing however. “But Lin..”

“Hm?”

“Just know that there never was a moment like Jinora said where I thought I should break things off with you. I was just worried that I was being too….selfish.”

“You _are_ selfish.” Lin answered seriously before relaxing her face into a smile upon seeing Tenzin’s tensed face. “But so are _all_ of us, to some degree. Relax Ten, I’m just teasing you.” She now walked towards him to put her hand on his shoulder.

Before she could pull away, Tenzin had pushed his chair backwards and pulled her towards him so that she lost her footing and unceremoniously fell to sit on his lap, before he claimed her lips with hers in a sweet kiss.

Lin couldn’t help but smile into the kiss. These moments took her back to years ago, but at the same time she felt so much more herself and therefore balanced and equal in this growing relationship.

Just then the children chose to burst into the house again. Meelo groaned in disgust, Jinora in embarrassment, but Ikki and Jun cheered in enthusiasm upon finding Lin in their father’s arms.

Lin quickly jumped off Tenzin’s lap however upon their entrance, a blush creeping up her cheeks.

“Haha, mom you are turning all red!” Jun laughed.

“Are we going to live in your house in the city now, aunt Lin? Can I still call you aunt Lin? Or are you going to live here? When will you be moving? Will you get married? Will we get more siblings?” Ikki fired question after question at them and Lin felt the urge to bolt return again.

“Ikki! Calm down!” Tenzin chastised his daughter in a loud voice, effectively silencing her.

“Sorry dad, aunt Lin.” The girl apologized with a guilty look.

Lin swallowed, looking at the four children in the room who were looking back at them expectantly. he realized that, even though Tenzin and she hadn’t quite figured out yet where in their relationship they were, they owed the four of them an explanation.

“Ok, how about the four of you sit down on the couch and your dad and I will try to explain what is going on.” She therefore suggested. The siblings obediently went to sit down in the living room, eager to know more, while Lin gestured towards Tenzin to come with her into the hallway.

“So, what do you want to tell them?” Lin whispered once they were in the hallway with the door closed. “We haven’t even really figured it out ourselves yet..”

“Well...let’s just begin by tackling the questions that are easy to answer.” Tenzin suggested.

Lin nodded. “Ok, so, clearly the answer is a solid _no_ to any more siblings. Although possible, I am far too old to raise another baby and four kids is _more_ than enough.”

She hadn’t fully finished her sentence yet before she realized that, while for her this was a no brainer, Tenzin might look at this differently. After all, hadn’t that been part of the reason everything had gone south in the first place all those years ago? “Or did you…did you want…” She therefore hesitantly added, looking at the airbender with insecurity entering eyes.

“Spirits no!” Tenzin was quickly to say. “Four is indeed _more_ than enough. I quite agree.” He chuckled. “Although let the record state that, even if it did happen, I would welcome it with open arms. Just to be clear. But no, no more children.”

“Good.” Lin smiled. “As for _marriage_ …You know my opinion on that. It hasn’t changed. I don’t particularly care for it. In any case not in this moment and maybe not ever.”

Tenzin nodded. “I can live with that. I would love to make you my wife one day, but I also fully respect that you have different views on this. In the end, what counts is us being together. And on that topic, I think that for now, alternating between our two homes will be fine, at least for the time that we are still denying to the outside world that anything is going on between the two of us.”

Lin nodded, she was grateful that Tenzin was essentially pushing all these determinative decisions about a relationship to a later time. It meant they were very much on the same page when it came to this relationship, or Tenzin was in any case accommodating and respecting her wishes. Which was just as good, if not even better.

“So if we are saying no to all these things, what are we saying yes to then?” She asked carefully.

Tenzin shrugged. “I don’t know…we are saying yes to spending time together, getting to know each other even better…we are saying yes to _loving_ each other. That seems a pretty solid start to me, right?”

Now it was Lin’s turn to be the one to respond with an impulsive kiss, wrapping her arms around the airbender’s neck so that she could pull him down towards her before uniting their lips – his hands instinctively found their way to rest on her hips.

“See? I can do slow.” Tenzin grinned when they broke the kiss. He seemed to read her mind.

“That you do.” Lin smiled.

“So, time to go inside then and tell them?”

Lin nodded and she took his hand in hers as they walked went to the living room. They would be alright, the two of them. And more importantly, Lin knew _she_ would be alright, with or without Tenzin. But with Tenzin sure would be a lot nicer…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just another note> Even though Linzin literally just got back together in the previous chapter, I am conciously ending the story here. This story was about Lin and Lin's relationship to Tenzin, both in the past and then in the years that followed as they found their way back together again. With that focus, although I am sad this story is ending, it feels natural to end this story here. 
> 
> On that note, my new fic will have established LinZin in it much sooner, so that I can explore that side of things too. So I can only say, check it out ;)!
> 
> Best,  
> Metope


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